There are no jokes about the language

1. A girl in high school said, "I walk more than you eat salt."

2 The fish of the house died, and came to the surface, and I cried out:"Daddy is on the surface! "

3. Last weekend, in front of Hualian, someone who looked like a student asked me to donate money. My classmate only had 100 yuan in his pocket, and there was no change, so she blurted out - "I'm really sorry, I really don't have any love at all!" "(I was going to say that the change is gone).

4 primary school students went to the army to give a condolence performance, and the counselor read out a letter "Respected leaders", probably seeing a group of people in the audience, so their brains were hot, and they said: "Respected martyrs! ”

5When I was discussing the Three Kingdoms with one of my classmates before!

I asked the military generals of the Three Kingdoms who he liked the most, and he stood up and said: "Red rabbit among people, Lu Bu among horses, haven't you heard of it?" ”

6On the way home, I saw a small stall selling small turtles, and a small sign was erected next to it to solicit business. I only heard my classmate read seriously to the small blackboard: "Ba-West-Small-Color-Electricity!" "Faint ......It's obviously a Brazilian little painted turtle.

7 When I was in college, my classmates went to the Sichuan restaurant together to be corrupt, and when I ordered a piece of pig's head meat, I talked for a long time, and the waiter couldn't understand it, and a classmate smiled and pointed to his head and said to the waiter: "Oh! Pork head!

Miss: "Oh......I see! Since then, this gentleman has been nicknamed "pig's head meat".

8 When I was in junior high school, once, before the end of the exam, the teacher said: Please put the table on the test paper and you can go out. I laughed wildly, and it took a long time for the teacher and other students to react.

A short story about Chinese characters 1

Because of Chinese characters, he was beaten on the board, and he often wrote the wrong strokes. Once he made a roster, he wrote the "阝" of the word "Chen" on the right side, and was beaten by the chief on 20 boards. From then on, the scholar remembered that "阝" should be written on the left, but unfortunately he wrote the word "Zheng" incorrectly, and he was hit by 20 boards.

One day, a person surnamed Nie asked him to write a statement, and the clerk was shocked: "I wrote two 'ears', and I was hit by forty boards, and you got three 'ears' and wanted my life?!" ”

A short story about Chinese characters 2

One morning, "Tuan" was shopping, and suddenly saw "Member", and he went up to greet him enthusiastically: "Hello! Round! ”

He said, "I don't know you." ”

Tuan" said: "We used to go together to pay New Year's greetings to other people's families, wishing them family reunions, why is it that when the weather is hot, you take off your coat and you don't know me?" ”

A short story about Chinese characters 3

Ten thousand words are difficult to writeOne year, the old man hired a scholar from the Chu State to teach his son to read. On the first day of school, the teacher wrote a pen on a blank piece of paper and told his son the size code, "This is a 'one' character."

His son studied very seriously and memorized it firmly, and when he returned, he wrote to the old man: "I learned one word - 'one'." "When the old man saw that his son had learned to use Huai manuscript skills, he saw it in his eyes and was happy in his heart.

The next day at school, the teacher wrote two more strokes on the paper with a brush and said, "This is the word 'two'." This time, my son didn't think there was anything new, so he remembered it and went home.

On the third day, the teacher wrote three strokes on the paper with a brush and said, "This is the word 'three'." The son's eyes rolled, as if he had realized something, and he couldn't study, so he threw down his pen and happily ran back to his father and said

Literacy is so simple that children have already learned it. Now don't bother Mr., lest you spend so much dowry money to ask Mr. Father, please dismiss Mr. Seeing that his son was so smart, the old man happily prepared a gratuity and dismissed the teacher.

A few days later, the old man wanted to invite a friend surnamed Wan to drink, so he told his son to get up early in the morning and write an invitation. The son agreed: "Okay, isn't it easy?" Look at me. ”

The old man saw that his son was full of confidence, so he was relieved to do other things. Time passed slowly, seeing that the sun was almost west, and he hadn't seen his son write it yet, the old man couldn't help but be a little anxious: "What's wrong with my son?"

After waiting and waiting, the old man finally got impatient and went to his son's room to urge.

When he entered the door, the old man saw his son sitting at the table with a sad face, and the paper was dragged on the ground, and there was a gang of underworlds on it. The son was drawing on paper with a wooden comb stained with ink, and when he saw his father come in, he complained: "There are so many surnames in the world, why does he have the surname Wan?"

I borrowed my mother's wooden comb, and I can write more than 20 strokes at a time, and from early in the morning to now, my hands are sore, and I have only written less than 3,000 strokes! It's hard to write 10,000 words! ”