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Yes, you're not wrong. His willfulness must be corrected as soon as possible. He is still young, and now he will make trouble for you, and you will meet him, and when he grows up, his requirements will be greater, and the result of this kind of character may be more serious than making trouble, and he will feel that you don't love him, don't care about him, and it will have a bad impact on his character.
So, what you have to do now is to overcome it slowly. He wants something that you feel justified by you.
Just satisfy him, if it is not perverse, you will resolutely not satisfy him, even if he goes to make trouble, don't be soft-hearted. Of course, these are not enough, the key is that you have to convince him that what you are doing is right, and he will be convinced. Don't just confront without explaining the reason, let him know what should be wanted, what should not be wanted, what kind of requirements are reasonable, what kind of requirements are unreasonable, he must know that not all his requirements can be satisfied.
Hopefully he will change soon!
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The child is 7 years old, which is childhood in the field of psychology.
Some researchers have proposed a three-stage model: the first stage, parental control (before the age of 6), and most decisions are made by parents. In the second stage, co-control (6-12 years old), parents supervise and guide the child's behavior at a distance, reinforce the child's self-monitoring behavior (e.g., explain the standard of behavior, explain how to reduce harm), and teach the child to know when to seek guidance from parents.
Your child is in the second stage, and you can make rational judgments to guide your child to develop good behavior habits, which are mainly formed by simple repetition and conscious practice.
Remind you that in the eight stages of Erikson's personality development, it is said that the main psychological development task of children aged 7-12 is to gain a sense of diligence and overcome inferiority complex; The focus on cultivating children's good personality traits is ability quality.
Hope you can use it.
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This is not okay, if he wants something in the future, don't give it to him immediately, make demands for him, such as a good performance for a week, excellent grades or something, let him know that he has to pay if he wants to get it.
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If you don't beat it now, you won't have a chance in the future! Why barbaric education, because as a Chinese, you have to work, you have to work a lot of time, you don't have time to travel with him everywhere, increase his knowledge, let him know what the vast world is, and he is very small! However, once the child realizes that he is very small from an early age, his future development will be very formal!
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You can't accommodate him anymore, you can't give him what you can't give, you can't give it to him no matter how much trouble he makes, as long as you succeed once, the key is that you have to be ruthless.
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Children are self-willed are used to their parents, since they were young, they are obedient to their children, and if they suddenly do not agree to their children's requests, the child will be unreasonable and force their parents to agree with his ideas and get what he wants in many ways.
Let him be willful, don't hit the south wall and don't look back, only let him suffer a little loss will grow, how much ability he has to make how much ability, if he has the ability, he will find his own way.
Willfulness and untimely correction will turn into rebellion, and when the child is rebellious, parents can't control him. Educate children from an early age to have the correct three views, especially values.
Let him understand that his parents raised him not because he should have taken it for granted, but because they are a family, he is still very young and cannot afford to make money, so his parents are willing to spend the money they earn for him.
As long as the parents give to learn to be grateful, don't pick and choose, children who know how to be grateful from an early age will rarely be willful, he will listen to his parents, the education of parents is very important, which directly affects the growth of children.
In a very realistic case, both children asked their father the same question, "How much money do we really have in our family?" ”
One father's child "Our family's money is all our parents' and has nothing to do with you", and the other father "Our family's money is yours, and everything in the future will be yours".
If the two fathers are different, they will naturally educate different children, and it is strange that the latter can educate well-behaved and sensible children.
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1. Empathy: Children are very willful, confrontation with adults, and do not listen to advice, which must make you feel very angry and helpless, right? Let's take a look at how to deal with it.
2. Concretization: Can you give an example of the specific manifestation of your child's willfulness?
Third, the cause of the problem, and specific analysis:
A The child craves more attention: It may be that the parents lack the necessary attention as the child grows up, and the child wants to cause trouble through willful behavior, so that the parent can care about his state.
Solution: Increase the time spent with the child, play or entertain with the child, and pay more attention to the details of the child's life and learning to meet the child's reasonable attention needs.
b Children crave affirmation and encouragement: Could it be that parents usually affirm and praise their children too little and criticize and blame them too much? Children want their self-worth to be recognized and appreciated by their parents, which is a very normal and reasonable psychological need.
If you can't get it for a long time, you will use rebellious, confrontational, and stubborn behavior to maintain your sense of worth and self-esteem.
Solution: Carefully observe the child's behavior, find out his strengths and good performance, and give timely affirmation and encouragement. For example, "You have improved a lot in this exam, and I noticed that it is because of your recent hard work and seriousness!" "You're very attentive and efficient in your homework now! ”
c The child craves the necessary rights and freedoms: Is it possible that the parents ignore the need for the child to make his own decisions and demand that the child obey the adult's arrangement in everything? As children grow older, they need to practice making their own choices and decisions.
Without reasonable choice and freedom, children tend to exhibit willful, confrontational behavior.
Solution: Gradually let go within a reasonable and tolerable range of consequences, and try to let children make their own judgments, choices, and decisions, and bear the natural consequences. This is a very important process for the child's real development.
When some small decisions are made and the children are allowed to do it, and the children's rights and freedom needs are reasonably satisfied, when they encounter more important decisions, the children will not be easily willful, causing serious consequences.
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Study hard under the Chinese culture The lack of Chinese culture education has caused modern children to have no sense of responsibility, be self-centered, disrespect their parents, and act willfully, study hard, and learn to improve a lot.
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Nowadays, many parents spoil their children, especially the elderly, causing their children to become very willful. Wayward children, on the other hand, tend to be selfish, don't like to think about the feelings of others, and don't care about the consequences....So what should be done to prevent children from being willful? There are a few suggestions.
Tools Raw materials.
moreLong-term control.
Method steps.
1 6 step by step reading.
Analyze the causes. Children's willfulness is actually that children can't control their emotions and behaviors, and act arbitrarily, so parents need to cultivate children's self-control, which can start from the following aspects.
Say no at the right time. Most of the time, adults are too satisfied with the child, no matter what kind of requirements the child puts forward, they try to meet it, causing the child to think that what he needs is what he deserves. Therefore, sometimes the child's request may not be met, and the child should be given reasonable reasons.
What should I do if my child is rebellious in the third year of junior high school, and the rebellious child is most suitable for this method, which parents must see.
People who pay attention to the third year of junior high school are also watching.
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Punish at the right time. Parents can also punish children when they let themselves play freely, so that children can understand that letting go is wrong.
Appropriately inspired. When the child behaves well, no longer willful but controls the time he watches TV, controls the number of times he looks at the mobile phone, and does other more meaningful things, parents can give appropriate material rewards or give encouragement, then the child will perform better and better under the effect of incentives.
Develop empathy. Children often do not take into account the feelings of others, only consider themselves, so it is necessary to cultivate children's empathy, let children consider the feelings of others, and understand the hardships, fatigue and difficulties of parents, so that children will understand their parents better and get closer to their parents.
Specify the target. Sometimes children are more laissez-faire when they are aimless, and when they have a goal to pursue, they will strive to achieve the goal instead of letting themselves do meaningless things.
Precautions. Changing the child's willful bad habits requires long-term regulation, and the child will definitely make a huge difference with the efforts of parents.
Like and share.
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"Parents are difficult to do, children are difficult to manage" has become another disease of the times. Children are too willful, picky and picky, a little unsatisfactory, they lose their temper, cry and make trouble, do not achieve their goals, and vow not to give up Parents often hear parents complain about these, and many parents are helpless about this. What should I do in this situation?
The child's first teacher is the parents, who want the child not to be willful, first of all, the parents are reasonable in case of trouble, and make a civilized and polite example for the child. Secondly, the family atmosphere should be harmonious and coordinated, so that children can grow up in a good family environment, and the bad habits can be gradually changed. If the child behaves willfully, parents should resolutely stop it, and never obey him or change his own request because of his crying.
When the child does not listen to the dissuasion and loses his temper, parents can ignore him and temporarily "cold" him. At this time, it is most appropriate to do this, and after the child's mood is slightly stable, that is, point out the harm of his doing this, how to do it is correct, parents should be patient and reasonable, and must not compromise or compromise on the child's unreasonable requirements. There are a variety of ways to tell the truth, such as in the form of short stories, so that children can be inspired when listening to the story and know what is right and wrong; It is also possible to compare the behaviors and attitudes of two children, so that the children can be educated more exemplified, and I believe that the effect of this parallel education will be very effective; It can also be used through simple analysis to let children understand the dangers of willfulness, so that children know that everything must be reasonable.
In short, parents should seize the opportunity to educate their children in a targeted manner. To make the child feel that his parents love him, parents to the child every request, try to let them understand a truth, only reasonable children are good children, so that children will gradually listen to their parents, and also understand how to be an obedient good child. It is very important for parents to be careful not to indulge their children or hurt their children's self-esteem when discouraging their children's willful behavior.
For example, if the child is cheating in front of relatives and friends, then the way to deal with it should be flexible and calm, and find a way to calm the child's emotions first, and then further help the education afterwards, which will have a good effect. The consistency of education is very important to change children's willful bad habits, and to make a provision for children's regular behaviors, such as: usual work and rest time, polite requirements for treating elders, not being willful, not picky, and civilized behavior.
In the implementation, encourage and affirm the child's practice, so that the child will develop in a good direction. Consistency between parents is also very important in the process of educating children, parents can not be strict, the other is wide, even the slightest disagreement will bring certain difficulties to the education of children. As long as the parents are unanimous and the education is coordinated, the child will change the bad habit of willfulness.
In this way, the relationship between parents and children will become closer and closer, and the family will be more harmonious and happy.
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First, adults should be consistent in educating their children. Second, distracting children is also a good way to solve willfulness. Three, if necessary, to punish.
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What should I do if my child is too willful? Star Awareness Project
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What should I do if my child is too willful? Star Awareness Project
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First, adults should be consistent in educating their children. Second, distracting children is also a good way to solve willfulness. Three, if necessary, to punish.
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Gold Course for Qualified Parents.
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