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When I saw this topic, Xiao M was in a coma when he got off work, and he suddenly chuckled in his heart, and thought about it seriously, it seemed to be true.
There are more and more outstanding single men and women around, and they are becoming more and more reserved, and everyone is shouting the slogan of getting rid of singles and doing chronic single cancer. Not taking the initiative and not paying is the biggest obstacle to this post-90s generation getting off the list, but even if girls are reserved, why are boys becoming less and less interested in pursuing girls?
Wait until you are excellent and then chase it.
Why not chase it? I feel that I am not good enough, and I want to wait for myself to become better before chasing it.
In the relationship between men and women, there is such a saying: in front of the person we like, we will feel inferior for no reason. In order to build self-confidence, we will set a goal threshold for ourselves before pursuing the other person to improve self-confidence.
As a result, you exercise, study, learn guitar, travel, take the TOEFL, and study, and slowly become the perfect person in your heart.
But the result? When you are successful and ready to confess with a rose, you find that person is in a pair with a person who can no longer be ordinary, talking and laughing.
As a result, you are heartbroken and feel that no matter how hard you try, you will not be able to get perfect love. Then, you fall, get drunk, dream and die, wander and never want to approach a person again.
Anyone who has ever been on the stage knows that people in the stands from under the stage always feel that they are shining. But if you go on the stage, you will find that the lights are too bright to see the people in the audience at all.
You always feel that you are not the best version of yourself, but the other party must be the best for her?
The timing of love is very important, and seizing the opportunity will have countless possibilities for the follow-up.
Concerns are growing.
There is a question on Zhihu about "why boys don't take the initiative to chase girls now", and the sharp expression has aroused many people's approval.
He said: "Life is already so difficult, why do you have to find an ancestor for yourself? ”
Although it is a joke, it is difficult to hide the helplessness of all the boys in the words.
Office Xiao Xu is a very handsome boy, and at first glance he is the type that girls will like. But once when I was chatting, I found out that he didn't have a girlfriend, and he had never even had a girlfriend, although he had liked someone before, but because he didn't take the initiative to pursue it, he didn't do it.
Xiao M asked him curiously the reason, and he said, maybe I don't think my conditions are enough.
Xiao M was very surprised at the time, his external conditions were really good!
Also, in a place like Shenzhen, where you live in a slightly better place, the rent will cost 3,000 yuan a month, or a four-bedroom bathroom will be crowded. Moreover, working overtime every day is a disaster, for him, it is only early morning and early morning, and he rarely gets off work before dawn.
He said that he just wants to make money now, and when he has enough confidence, he will pursue the girl he likes. He doesn't want to start a relationship casually when he doesn't have much savings every month, which is difficult to last.
After saying that, he pouted and smiled.
How so? Although as a girl, Xiao M thinks that there will be some girls who will not care about this.
But Xiao M understands his entanglement, too.
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I think boys don't want to chase girls, most of the reason is because it's too difficult to chase, because girls nowadays have very high requirements for their other half, and many boys know that their conditions are not up to the requirements, so they won't go to ask for fun.
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Because chasing girls is a very tiring thing, and there is not necessarily a return for paying, so it's because it's too difficult to chase, not that you don't want to chase.
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I think I really don't want to chase it, because sometimes you find that you pay a lot, but there is no result, so many people don't want to do this kind of thing a second time.
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Because girls nowadays are really difficult to chase, they are very realistic and want a lot of things, so today's boys don't have enough economic strength, and they don't dare to pursue them.
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Because the requirements of girls nowadays are too high, boys don't want to chase girls, mainly because it's too difficult to chase.
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In fact, I don't want to chase it, because I feel that a person's life is also very comfortable, and if there is one more person, I will not get used to it.
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It's because it's too difficult to chase, because girls nowadays are very realistic, and if you don't have a successful career and a high income, it's hard to catch up with girls.
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Today's girls are so realistic、What do you think is the fun of chasing young girls today? Just talk about money and get married!
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Oh, yes. It's really hard to chase, and my own conditions are not good, so forget it.
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Work hard to make money, and when the time comes, fate will come naturally.
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It's better to be single, don't chase it with time and energy!
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<> "Why are boys reluctant to chase girls now?", the following three points tell you the answer.
1. Some girls regard "poisonous chicken soup" as a love treasure.
If you love her, you should spoil her for a lifetime and tolerate everything about her. "If you meet true love, you can never be sensible. These words seem to be teaching girls how to take the initiative in love, but in fact they distort their view of love.
Love is the relationship between two independent people based on their emotional needs for each other, it is an equal relationship, and there is no one who wants to grovel to whom, and give what they want.
2. Excessive pursuit of ritual after falling in love.
How important is a sense of ritual in love? When the freshness fades and returns to the plain, the sense of ritual can remind two people that even in the days of firewood, rice, oil and salt, love is still shining. But I don't know when it started, but the sense of ritual slowly changed its taste.
520 red envelopes, Qixi gifts, shopping lists for Double 11, Christmas surprises, it seems that all festivals have become Valentine's Day. There is even a boyfriend rating table for how much money to spend on girlfriends for a level, and every extra amount of money spent will be upgraded to a level, such a frequent and excessive sense of ritual not only can not warm up the relationship, but will make the boy feel invisible pressure. There is nothing wrong with the sense of ritual itself, but if you overemphasize your needs and feelings for the sense of ritual, you lose its original meaning.
3. The progress bar of chasing girls is slow, and there may be no results in the fight.
It is said that love starts from the heart, so the person who is moved first will pursue the other party in some ways, but in this process, the other party also needs to respond in order to keep the relationship moving forward. But many boys find that some girls just like the feeling of being chased and don't really want to respond to his liking, so they give up over time.
Unexpectedly, it was the other party who reversed the gear and accused him of being impatient and not chasing hard enough. At this time, the boy will also feel very wronged, and he holds a sincere heart, but he does not get the same sincerity, so why stop the loss in time?
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Because the boys know that women are not chased, but attracted, and it is their own charm that attracts girls to their side. And now boys don't chase girls anymore, because they don't know how to attract girls, so they don't know how to chase girls. Therefore, the reason why boys don't chase girls is because they don't know how to attract girls, so they don't know how to chase girls.
The reason boys don't pursue girls is because they don't know how to attract girls, so they don't know how to pursue girls. Because today's boys don't know how to pursue girls, they don't know how to pursue girls, so they don't pursue girls. Hello!
Because girls are hard to chase nowadays, boys have given up pursuing. Nowadays boys don't chase girls because they don't chase girls. Because girls are too difficult to chase now, boys don't want to put so much effort into it, so they don't chase it.
Hello! Because girls are hard to chase nowadays, boys have given up pursuing.
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The popularity of social**. Social networking is now very commonplace, and people can easily meet new people and potential partners through various apps. In this case, the boy may feel unjustified in pursuing the girl because they can find other ways to rent it to meet their needs through social**.
The fast pace of modern society. The fast pace and high stress of modern society can leave boys feeling tired and helpless. In this case, they may not have the time or energy to pursue the girl and prefer to choose to relax or find other ways to relieve stress.
Changes in gender roles. With the progress of society and the change of gender roles, women are more independent and dissimilar and have developed more in the workplace, they have more freedom and choice. This also makes it more difficult for men to pursue women, and even feels pressured and challenged.
Lack of self-confidence and experience. Some guys may lack the confidence and experience to pursue girls, fear rejection or don't know how to express their feelings. In this case, they may be more inclined to wait for the girl to take the initiative or find other ways to build a relationship.
In summary, changes in modern society and personal factors can lead to a boy's reluctance to pursue a girl. However, the pursuit of relationships is still an important form of interpersonal communication that can help boys improve their self-confidence and social skills, and it is worth trying in the right circumstances.
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Why are boys now generally envious and unwilling to pursue girls, combined with their own experience and opinions, there are mainly the following square halls:
1.Stress and anxiety: Modern society has higher expectations for men, and they face pressures from professional, financial, and social pressures. These pressures can make them less motivated to fall in love and pursue relationships.
2.Impact of Socializing: The popularity of socializing and the increase in virtual communication have made it easier for people to connect and communicate, reducing the need for traditional face-to-face pursuits.
Men may be more inclined to seek relationships through social platforms rather than traditional ways of pursuing.
3.Independence and personal development: Modern society emphasizes personal independence and self-development, and men may focus more on pursuing personal goals and career development and putting relationships on the back burner.
They may prefer a stable and equal partnership rather than just pursuing the process of falling in love and chasing.
4.Changes in values: Changes in values may also affect men's attitudes towards pursuing women. Men may be more focused on matching their partner's shared values, interests, and goals than just physical appearance or the process of pursuit.
Women will face more difficulties and obstacles than men on the road to success and development, and women must put in more hardships and efforts to achieve their careers. This is because there is a male-centered social background for thousands of years, women face more pressure than men, and because modern society requires professional women to take on the burden of career and family, and because women have more psychological obstacles and weaknesses that must be overcome than men in the process of development. Therefore, having a healthy psychology and cultivating a good psychological quality is the need for modern women to adapt to social development and the need for women's successful development.
Opposites attract, this is an inevitable trend of growth.
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