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I think that after the child becomes an adult, you should not be friends with the child, because the adult child should be separated from the arms of the parents, so that the child has the ability to be independent, at this time if you see the child as a friend, you will not be able to bear it.
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When the child is young, we should be a good teacher of the child, and we should not be friends with the child, which will usually make the child become unruly.
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<>1. When communicating with children. Communicating with them is one of the ways to build a good relationship. When you are young, you should talk to them more often, induce them to share their daily life with you, and if you have the desire to share, you will have a topic, so that even if the child grows up, he is willing to share it with you.
Where do friends come from, either they have the same hobbies or the same brain circuits. If you want to be friends with them, you must first learn their way of thinking. You can't look at this from an adult's point of view, because it's unfair to him.
With social interaction, what kind of people to talk to, with children, you talk about Ultraman, talk about Pleasant Goat, so that there will be a topic, and they are willing to communicate with their parents in depth; To put it mildly, parents want to communicate with their children, so they have to follow their wishes.
But remember not to be half-hearted when your child is talking to you. Either tell him to wait until you're done and listen to him, or stop listening to him, sometimes children's desire to share is like this. If your child is not willing to share with you and wants to be friends with him, it will be useless to have no topic.
When playing with themPlaying games with them, telling them stories, and taking them on a tour are all companions, but they also have to be done in the right way. You have to see the fun in the game, and from a parent's point of view, the child's game is so pediatric. But if we want to be friends with them, we must find fun in pediatrics, as the second article says, think from the child's point of view, think from the child's point of view, this game is the most fun.
Many of the child's advantages and disadvantages can also be seen from the company, which is more convenient for targeted correction in the future, and of course, it cannot be spared with appreciation.
But! We should be like parents like friends, not friends like parents. In the face of some major rights and wrongs, he cannot be educated as a friend, and over time he will ignore the identity of "parent".
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Some people think that parents should respect their childrenYou should live in peace with your child, so you should be friends with your childSome believe that the primary responsibility of primary parents is discipline and guidance, so you can't be friends with your child.
As a parent, sometimes you can be friends with your child, because after being friends, there will be more and more interaction with your child, and sometimes you have to discipline your child and can't be friends.
Friendship is a role-play, so playing with your child helps parents observe and understand how their child thinks and behaves. Children live in two worlds, one is with their peers and other children, and the other is with adults, mainly parents, relatives and teachers. Friends with children are conducive to the connection between these two worlds and are helpful to children's growth.
At this time, the child actually has a lot of time, and he needs the company of his parents very much, so parents have a lot of opportunities to be friends with them, which is actually a very rare opportunity for many parents to grow up again。By returning to the role of children and getting in touch with children's nature, parents can make up for many of the shortcomings of their own growth as children, provided that adults must catch their children like a child.
There is a fundamental difference between the relationship between friends and parent-child relationship, friends are completely equal to each other, and there are no obligations and responsibilities that must be borne by each other. In the middle of the relationship between the family and the bridge, parents are the responsibility and obligation of parenting, and parents must first fulfill their guiding responsibilities as parents, and then become friends with their children.
First, before the age of ten, it is the age of worship for parents
It is easier to listen to the advice of parents, so the bright wheel is fierce to parents at this stage, to be a good teacher, good rules, do not rush to be friends with children, children at this age do not have the ability to measure and judge things, when they are young, do not set good rules for children, and then set rules when they grow up will be very difficult, is public.
Second, after the age of ten, children despise their parents
Gradually form self-awareness, so at this time, parents should be their children's friends, ask more questions, suggest less, teach children to solve problems by themselves, and form an independent personality.
As a parent, when it's time to make friends with your child, you should be there for your child as a friend and play with them. When it is time to appear by their side as parents, we must educate them to be good people and do things well.
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<> many young parents believe that the best way to get along with their children is to be good friends with them. So when should parents become good friends with their children?
My suggestion is,Don't make friends with your child when it's time to make rules (2-6 years old).
It's about getting past this stage and becoming good friends with your child.
Children begin to perceive this colorful world from birth, if the awareness of rules is established in time, it is conducive to the development of children's cognition, which will make children have a "sense of boundary", if they are friends with children too early, lack of rules and authority, it is easy for children and parents to lack this "sense of boundary", which is not conducive to the establishment of stool rules; Moreover, children are in a state of parental attachment for a long time, which is not conducive to their integration into society. Therefore, at the age of 2-6 years old, parents should respect the autonomy of their children, not only have the authority of their parents, but also set rules for their children, parents and children respect each other, and then establish a friend relationship with children "both teachers and friends" is the best state.
So how do you build a friendship with your child? First of all, we must change our mindsAbandon the traditional concept of parents and children, don't think that the child is not just a "little child" and "don't understand anything", to regard the child as an independent individual, fully respect their opinions, discuss and coordinate with them with an equal attitude to make decisions, help the child check on big issues, and learn to let go of small things; The second is to change the way you communicate, do not communicate with adults in a commanding manner, so that the child will not have any psychological burden; And learn to find common topics with your child, don't talk to the chicken, play the piano to the cow, so that soon, the conversation between the child and you will be boring; Encouragement to children is also a good way, children have just made a little achievement, when sharing with you, I hope to get your encouragement, so don't be stingy with your praise, otherwise the child will have a feeling of inferiority and self-esteem. When you get along as a friend, try to avoid hitting and scolding your child, and no friend will beat and scold your friend.
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To be friends with children, that is, to enhance the parent-child distance with children, to be able to understand his inner world of this relationship, to be a child's "friend" is to let children develop in a good way, in order to be more suitable for education.
So when should you be friends with your child as a parent?
Attitude is very important if you want to get closer to your childIn daily life, if you often treat your child's faults in a bad way like "yelling", your child will naturally be afraid of you, and the distance will naturally be shortened.
First learn to put down your parental shelf, joke with your child, and come together with harmless "pranks."Only by playing with children can children let down their guard against you and have no reservations about you, which is an important part of the parent-child relationship.
Children will make different choices in different things, and parents should listen carefully to their children's words and also give affirmation to the choices he makesIf there is something wrong with his choice, give some suggestions, but don't directly deny the child, you must respect him, respect is mutual.
When the child has made achievements, even if it is an inconspicuous thing in the eyes of the parents, it is necessary to give affirmation and encouragement to the child, so that the child can be more confident and increase the parent-child relationship, we should give the child a positive encouragement, so that the child has greater confidence in his heart.
Picture books can bring early education and enlightenment to children, but some of them children will have to consult their parents, and parents can not only let children learn more thingsIt can also increase the relationship between parents and children, and the children will also tell you what is in their hearts, and confide in their parents as friends.
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As a parent, you should become different types of friends with your child at different stages
1 During the child's infancy, parents should play the role of friends in their child's play
Children like to play with oaks during this period, and they will be full of curiosity about the world. Only with the full company of parents, happy interaction and play together, can a fortress of trust be established. Children will learn to share their hobbies and pleasures with their parents, and opening the door to sharing the world will be beneficial to children's future growth.
Children in infancy and toddler years trust the partners they play with, which lays a solid foundation for equal relationships later in life.
2. Serve as a learning partner in your child's primary and secondary schools
For children, learning is boring, as parents we need to guide children patiently, from time to time to help children solve learning problems and difficulties. Let the child feel that we are advancing and retreating with her, and he is not fighting alone. With the power of the collective, I believe that children will be more attentive in their learning.
My parents have worked so hard, and I must work harder. Parents should show an equal posture and not reprimand their children in a condescending tone, which will further dampen their children's enthusiasm for learning. This stage is the most critical period for children's learning, and it is necessary to use scientific methods to guide children and work together with children to advance and retreat together, which is the true meaning of partners.
3 In college or even after employment, be a good friend to your children in terms of life and growth
During this period, children have gradually entered society, and many aspects may be very different from what they imagined at the beginning. At this time, parents need to actively guide their children and talk to them more. In this way, we can ensure that the child will avoid detours and will not go astray.
Don't think that everything will be fine if you are admitted to university or even employed, in fact, there will be many problems when your child grows up, it just depends on whether he is willing to tell you, if you communicate with him as an equal, maybe it will help him a lot. Be sure to be good at communication and timely guidance.
That's my answer, I hope it helps.
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The relationship between parents and children is a very good oneBasicrelationship. The relationship between parents and children is not only as parents of children, but also as friends of children. But this"Friends" are not simply "friends" in our daily lives.
Friend relationships in our daily lives are comparisonsRelaxed and pleasantFor themselves isThere are no big requirements。But parents are sure to be with their childrenThere are requirements, so parents should be friends with their children at the right timeIt's not always possible for parents to be friends with their childrenAs a parent, you also have to take responsibility for educating your children. So when should parents be friends with their children?
Here are my personal thoughts:
1. Be friends with your child during their playtime. There must be education in the growth of children, so we have the most in educationThe child's academic problems. For children's academic problems, as parentsYou should stick to your principles.
Because the child's mind is still young and his self-control ability is weak, parents are neededGuide children to study hard, study hard, and complete their studies. In addition to the child's study time,During your child's playtime, you can be a good friend to your child as a parent. Interact with children during playtime and accompany them to grow up happily.
2. Be friends with your child on certain choices。On the road of life, it is inevitable to make many choices. SoParents, as the guides of children, must guide children to make the right choices in their children's choices.
But not all choices are made by children and their parents' choices. Parents are the guides of their childrenThe child is also a complete individual, an independent personalityThey will have their own ideas in their choices. As a parent, you also need to respect and understand your child's choices like a friend.
3. Be friends with your children in life. In ordinary life, parents need to be like friendsGive your child equality, respect, and understanding。Instead of oppressing children under the banner of being a parent of a child.
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