Who have you met with high emotional intelligence?

Emotional intelligence, also known as emotional intelligence, is a kind of ability to control one's emotions, the so-called high emotional intelligence people, is emotional, when encountering difficult problems, can still maintain a calm mind, calm and calm; Or when getting along with people, be able to handle the relationship between people well; Or take everything around you seriously and be good at handling everything.

Nowadays, there is no shortage of people with high emotional intelligence around me, including my family, friends, classmates, and many movie stars, some people can play the role of roommates very well, some people can treat everyone very kindly, and some people can act as listeners among friends, but the two people I admire the most are Huang Bo and Wu Jing, Huang Bo is a member of the known "Double Yellow", because of his unique appearance, so the most memorable, the recent super popular "Wolf Warrior 2", It also allows more people to know this Chinese tough guy with an iron backbone, and everyone is deeply impressed by this man who regards his career as his life, and I admire his high emotional intelligence even more. <>

Let me admire Huang Bo's high emotional intelligence lies in a "Golden Horse Award Incident", once again at the Golden Horse Awards ceremony, Huang Bo appeared on the stage as an award guest, wearing a dress shaped like a "nightgown", which was sarcastically ridiculed by Zheng Yuling: Huang Bo, Huang Bo, why did you come today wearing a nightgown, haven't you woken up yet? In this case, the average celebrity guest with low EQ will be embarrassed, but the person Zheng Yuling is scolding today is Huang Bo, who knows that when he opens his mouth, his IQ is full of explosives:

I regard the Golden Horse Award as my home, I come to my house, is it strange to wear a dressing gown, of course not strange.

At that time, the audience burst into warm applause. Let's talk about another person with high emotional intelligence that I admire - Wu Jing, the recent "Wolf Warrior 2" can be described as a hot mess, in an interview, when the reporter asked: If you compete with Donnie Yen, who do you think will win?

Why would the reporter ask this question, it is rumored that Wu Jing and Donnie Yen are not in harmony, and both of them are martial arts action stars, so when asked this question, you must respect both the opponent and yourself, so Wu Jing has to take this question well, after 3 seconds of thinking, Wu Jing said: I hit 120. This sentence is to say that both of us are powerful, if we really fight each other, both of us will go to the hospital, how witty, even the tricky reporters have praised again and again.

<> modern society, IQ is no longer the only criterion for measuring a person, IQ and EQ dual quotient can really eat in this era. In life, there are often many people with high IQ but low EQ, and this kind of person will be very uncomfortable to get along with, I have met a lot of people with high EQ, they are unassuming but can not be ignored, EQ is actually manifested in the details of life.

People with high emotional intelligence tend to be listeners rather than tellers. When friends are in trouble or have something on their mind, they listen carefully and give the right advice at the right time. Low emotional intelligence is when a friend or family member confides in you, and you shift the conversation to yourself or simply ignore it.

Therefore, people with high emotional intelligence are always the center of gravity and focus of the lives of those around them.

Secondly, people with high emotional intelligence are mostly very self-controlled. They are able to control their words and actions according to their own consciousness and requirements, so people with high emotional intelligence generally do not do things out of the ordinary, their lives will be organized, and they will create a kind of "order" in their lives. This order makes them appear invulnerable at all times, which is why people with high emotional intelligence are easily admired and imitated by others because they live their lives the way others want them to.

There are also people with high emotional intelligence, who are easy to accept the opinions of others, they will humbly accept criticism from different people, and reflect on themselves and correct their mistakes. People with low emotional intelligence have an obvious manifestation of irritability and do not accept criticism from others, such people are often self-centered and very selfish, and there will be a lot of unhappiness in the process of getting along with the people around them. Over time, no one will really like this kind of person with low emotional intelligence.

The strong enemies I encountered, several big bosses, are all masters of mental skills, and they are enthusiastic on the surface, but in fact they are gradually wearing down your will, which is very terrifying.

<> one rainy day, when I got in the car, there were quite a lot of people, and I stood next to an old lady. The old lady's hair was gray, but it was evident that she had taken care of herself carefully before going out—her hair was meticulously combed, and the excess shredded hair around her ears was pinned with traditional black hairpins. The old lady looked up at me and smiled and said

Do you need me to help you with your umbrella, girl? "My first reaction was, why help me with my umbrella? Then I immediately found out that my umbrella was not put away, and when the bus turned, the rain dripped on the old lady.

I quickly apologized, and then put away my umbrella. In this case, others may directly and impatiently throw a sentence: The water on your umbrella has dripped to me!

I was deeply touched by the way this old lady handled it.

Huang Bo has a very high emotional intelligence, and he can often resolve some embarrassing scenes of notes.

People with high emotional intelligence tend to be peaceful, good at communicating, and are at home in relationships, better able to achieve the life goals they have set.

Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and relate to others.

You must have had the experience that when you are in a bad mood, it is easy to say something offensive to others, and even to get into conflict with others. This is a sign of low emotional intelligence.

So how can you improve your ability to regulate your emotions?

Emotions can be divided into two types: original emotions and derived emotions.

Primordial emotions are your instinctive reactions to events that you can't change.

For example, you are shy when you see strangers.

"Shyness" is your original emotion.

Derived emotions, on the other hand, are caused by your thoughts, which are how you feel after processing your original emotions.

For example, you don't dare to tell others about your shyness because you are afraid that others will look down on you.

At this time, "fear" is your derivative emotion.

To put it simply, a derived emotion is a thought that you generate, and if the idea is not reasonable, you will behave irrationally.

Therefore, to improve your ability to regulate your emotions, it is necessary to control your derived emotions and not let them interfere with your judgment of things.

There is a common way to regulate one's derived emotions:

Paying too much attention to what has already happened can lead to immersing oneself in the pain of the past and being haunted by past emotions. Only by accepting yourself without any judgment can you live a healthier life.

Wanting to improve one's emotional intelligence and being able to control one's derivative emotions is only half the battle. The other half is to improve your interpersonal skills.

There are four commonly used tips:

For example, instead of saying "You're me off so much that I don't want to pay attention to you anymore," say "I'm feeling angry and I want to be quiet for a while."

The advantage of this is that it reminds you to focus on yourself and focus on describing your feelings to gain understanding.

For example, "I'm sad to hear you say that" is better than "I'm sad to hear you say that."

While on the surface there may not seem like a difference between the two, the first statement means that you will be responsible for your emotions; The second argument has the implication of blaming the other party for one's negative emotions.

Active listening is not just listening, but also feedback.

Let the other person know that you are not only listening, but that you are able to understand what he is saying.

When you have the ability to control your emotions, as well as the ability to communicate with others, you are a person with high emotional intelligence.