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1. Unclear panorama and silence.
Many people like to talk about other people's gossip as a way to kill their own boring time, but in adult time, casually judging others is a sign of low emotional intelligence. In the profession of psychology, a person's openness to the outside world and the evaluation of things are actually a kind of self-projection of the individual's body to a certain extent. In the projection effect, people will often classify their personal psychological characteristics to others, and then subjectively assume that others also have the same characteristics.
For example, everyone likes to drink tea, and then they feel that others should also like to drink tea like us, or they are half-orcs, or they are withdrawn. Many people have always liked to stand on the moral high ground to evaluate the advantages and disadvantages of others, and then use a single norm to identify how others should behave.
Looking at the mountains as mountains and the water as water, a person does not have a comprehensive understanding of a thing and makes a casual evaluation, which is subjective and does not have stability. And when a woman evaluates more often, she will be a character who sows discord in the eyes of others, and then makes people want to not want to chat with her. The Jewish Talmud says:
No one can see the world as it really is, all we see is the world as we see it. We can think of the "bathroom mirror" as a reason for everyone's loss of mind, and they affect others and harm ourselves! Therefore, when a woman treats a matter, the correct attitude should be to be modest and cautious, not to know the whole picture, and not to evaluate it.
2. Be the best version of yourself and don't spread negativity.
Husband and wife are the most intimate relationship in the world, so in the relationship, women can't help but increase the distance between two people, and use the other half as the help of their feelings. There is nothing wrong with this kind of behavior, just when we are too close, we will subjectively assume that the other party is the help of everyone's emotions, and then without the permission of the other party, let these good emotions or not so good emotions be distributed on the other person's body.
We always release the side of the trough cake to the people closest to us, but we hardly talk about whether they want to or not. People will encounter things that don't go well in their lives, but the most important thing is to get up immediately after falling, and then the next time you encounter a similar situation, you will be able to avoid it, instead of blindly scolding and complaining. When we show the negative emotions to the other half, they will comfort everyone and solve the difficulties for everyone, but the frequency is too much, who will be physically and mentally exhausted, and the constant reprimand and complaint will make the other person gradually fall into the bottom, and then unable to extricate themselves.
Therefore, a good marriage is inseparable from the maintenance of a good attitude, and a positive and optimistic approach to married life, so that married life will be grateful and return the same happiness.
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First, don't speak ill of your mother-in-law, second, don't say anything bad about your husband, and third, don't speak ill of your in-laws' relatives, which is conducive to the stability of the relationship between husband and wife.
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A smart woman who does not speak ill of her inner dissatisfaction in front of her husband, does not speak ill of her husband in front of her mother-in-law, and does not speak ill of her mother-in-law in front of outsiders often has a higher status.
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Don't say bad things about your husband's family, don't say bad things about your mother's family, and don't say bad things about your neighbors.
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Needless to say, the mother-in-law's flaws.
In all the TV dramas about mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it is because the man is quiet between the daughter-in-law and the mother that the family war breaks out. Women must understand that no matter how crucial they are in a man's life, the mother will always be an irreplaceable character for a man. Therefore, it is not good to tell your husband about your mother-in-law, which will only put the man in a dilemma, and it will even affect your emotions.
A woman with high emotional intelligence will understand how to replace sentences with behavior, be filial to her mother-in-law, ignore her mother-in-law's neglect, and be herself first. In this way, men will cherish you more, and your in-laws will think that you are very virtuous and really value you.
The personal property of the lover is not discussed.
Whether it is in the emotionally deep link or the emotionally stable link, there is no need to casually mention to the husband that their parents' asset problems are difficult. The reason is very simple, no one's parents would like an outsider who covets their assets. In the in-law's family, women are inherently intruders, and casually discussing other people's personal property is the main manifestation of money worship in a woman's camp.
Therefore, don't talk to your husband about the asset problems of your in-laws, which will make it more difficult for you to integrate into your in-laws. You need to understand that women don't say things like that in front of their husbands in order to get the high attention of their in-laws.
I don't blame my husband for wrongdoing.
As a parent, you must be looking forward to your son to find a virtuous and obedient woman who loves you, and I think in most cases, men also want to have a deep relationship with their parents. If a woman is a daughter-in-law, she often blames the man, which will seriously damage the man's self-esteem. When their parents learn that their son is gradually depressed and unable to keep up with anything, it is because of your factors, they will complain about you.
After all, his own son must be heartbroken. Therefore, if you often blame men, not only will the love that men give you gradually disappear, but also continue to reduce your influence in your in-laws' family, and even directly treat you as an outsider, and will no longer attach great importance to your existence.
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Don't say bad things about your parents-in-law, men are not embarrassed, and your parents-in-law are dignified. will not use love to morally kidnap her husband and make herself consume highly. will not insult her husband's personality, and you can occasionally talk about your husband's shortcomings, but you can't let your husband have no dignity.
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Don't talk about the shortcomings of your mother-in-law, don't talk about your partner's family property, don't count your husband's wrongs, don't talk about your family's contradictions, don't talk bad about your husband, don't talk about money, the establishment of marriage is very complicated, but if you want the marriage to continue, you need to think carefully.
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Don't talk about the affairs of your mother's family, don't talk about the basic situation of your mother's family, don't talk about the contradictions of your mother's family, don't take money too seriously, and don't talk about the shortcomings of your in-laws.
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The first thing to bear the brunt of is the mother-in-law's badness (there is no impermeable wall, one day it will be known by the mother-in-law, and what is known is still after adding oil and vinegar to intensify the conflict); The second is the economic situation of the in-laws, especially the conditions are not very good.
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The housework of the mother-in-law will not be told to others, and if it is said, it will be easy to leave a bad impression on others, and the relationship between yourself and your mother-in-law will generally not be told to others, even if you say it to others, it will not help much to improve the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in many cases.
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A smart woman will not tell the outside world about her mother-in-law's badness, and there are some ugly things in the family, because these things are disgraceful in themselves, and if you tell others, others will treat them as jokes.
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First, the economic situation of the in-laws' family, the wealth is not exposed. Second, the emotional crisis of the parents-in-law and mother-in-law, the ugliness of the family is not publicized. Third, the relationship between the husband and brother and sister. Not much involved.
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A smart woman never interferes with these things in her mother-in-law's family, how do you do that?
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After getting married, a woman has these two behaviors, which will make her in-laws look down on her.
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A woman who doesn't have any temper and is particularly indecisive, not only has no status in her in-laws' family, but even her husband will look down on her, because they only know how to give, and they don't ask for anything in return, and no one will take her seriously.
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A woman with a particularly strong sense of vanity and a more material personality must have no status in her in-law's family, and in real life, such a woman often has no dignity at all, and many people will look down on her.
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is a woman who has no opinions and is not financially independent, this kind of woman will make her in-laws and her husband feel that she is not very good, so there will be a phenomenon of looking down on her.
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It must be a woman who likes to toss, this kind of woman loves to be in the limelight, likes to compare, is often dissatisfied with life, and loves to nag.
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The woman who cheated and was finally forgiven, although she was forgiven, she had no family status, and no one looked down on her from top to bottom.
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Talk about some of the bad things about your husband. Because the in-laws are still oriented towards their husbands in general, they try to say as little as possible about their husbands' bad places. That will make a good impression of my grandmother's house.
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In fact, in the real society, there are really few mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship between mother and daughter, even if the status of the mother-in-law's family is very high, usually speak to achieve the most basic respect, can not show impoliteness to the family, impatience, a person's quality often also determines the level of your family status, we must try not to say bad things about the family, do not say bad things about the mother-in-law, do remember that you love the family.
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Don't say that her son is bad, only good. Don't say that the mother-in-law is not good. It's not easy to say that my mother-in-law is good or good. Not to mention how difficult it is at home. Just talk about how hard you work. Don't talk about your difficulties, just show your strength.
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Do not speak ill of your mother-in-law in front of outsiders, and often praise your mother-in-law and lover will think you are very sensible. Gain respect in a virtuous circle of mutual recognition and dedication. If you don't complain about your marriage at home, there will be friction and disagreements in your marriage, so you can gain a relatively stable married life by correcting your mentality and finding a way to get along that suits you.
I think that a really smart woman will not disrespect each other's feelings in a relationship, and she will not quarrel with each other often, and she will not often complain and dislike each other, and she will not often distrust each other, be suspicious of each other, feel that the other party does not love her, and she will not be too possessive and controlling of the other party.
Wise women are not willing to marry these three families, women must understand.
First of all, it is absolutely not acceptable to give up your hobbies, otherwise you will feel very bored, and then you can't give up your job, so you will lose your economy, of course, you can't lose your circle of friends, otherwise you will feel very empty.
As long as it's you, it's absolutely fine! Because you favor him. You know, although some men like that kind of openness, but what is the direct purpose? >>>More
If a woman doesn't share things with you, no matter if you go, you don't care about the things at home, it's like a dead heart to you.