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Teaching children to be kind is a common expectation among parents, and here are some suggestions to help develop kindness in children:
Lead by example: Be a good role model for your child and model kindness, kindness, respect, and care for others with your own behavior.
Develop empathy: Encourage children to put themselves in the shoes of others and understand their situations.
Encourage sharing: Cultivate children's awareness of being willing to share objects, knowledge, and feelings with others, so that they can experience the joy of helping others.
Praise for good behavior: Praise your child's kind behavior in a timely manner so that they know that kindness is recognized and encouraged.
Tell stories of kindness: Let your child listen to stories about kindness, kindness, and helping others to inspire their kind hearts.
Guided conflict resolution: Teach children to resolve conflicts peacefully and amicably, rather than using violence or hurting others.
Encourage volunteering: Participate in some volunteer service activities, so that children can experience the joy of dedication to society and others.
Let children make their own choices: Give children a certain amount of autonomy and give them the opportunity to make kind choices in their daily lives.
Promote the values of kindness: In family education, the values of kindness, kindness, respect and care for others are emphasized.
Correct inappropriate behavior: When a child exhibits unkind behavior, give appropriate guidance and correction in a timely manner.
Give love and security: Give your child plenty of love and security so that they can grow up in a warm, stable family environment.
Through the above methods, parents can help their children develop the qualities of kindness, friendliness, respect and concern for others, so that they can grow up to be a kind person. At the same time, it is also necessary to be patient and understanding, and give your child enough support and guidance.
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I remember seeing the question: "Should you teach your child kindness or reality first", teach him to be kind.
Life will slowly make him learn to be kind in reality, and you teach him to be realistic.
There was no one to teach him to be kind.
I choose kindness because it will make them slow in the days to come.
Learn to be kind in reality. But if I teach them reality, then no one teaches them kindness. I don't think that human nature is inherently good, nor does I think that human nature is inherently evil, I think that good and evil are inseparable, just like two sides of a coin.
In fact, I think that human nature is like flowing water, it needs to be guided. People will encounter a lot of good and evil things in this life, so I have to guide them to good. Because if you are directing an environment for good, then it will be better, and vice versa.
Here is a quote from Mother Teresa for you: Even if you are honest and straightforward, people may still deceive you, no matter what, you still have to be honest and straightforward; People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered, and you have to be reasonable anyway; Even if you are friendly, people may still say that you are selfish and ill-motivated, but you still have to be kind anyway; When you achieve fame, you will have some false friends and some real enemies, and no matter what, you will still be successful; What you've built for years, someone destroys overnight, and you still have to build it anyway; If you find peace and happiness, they may be jealous of you, and you will still be happy no matter what; The good deeds you do today will often be forgotten tomorrow, and you still have to do good deeds no matter what; Even if you give the best of you to the world, maybe these things will never be enough, no matter what, give the best of you to the world. You see, in the end, it's between you and God, not between you and others.
So we have to remember that it is the world, not the human being, that nourishes and gives us the life of the ox. Therefore, we must repay the world with kindness, and fight endless evil with endless goodness. Of course, I think there is a big difference between being kind and being brainless, and this point should be clearly distinguished.
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As a parent, you must set a good example for your children, so that children can have a kind heart and lend a helping hand when others are in trouble.
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Tell your child not to hurt anyone or animals. When faced with something, you must think on the bright side.
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Parents themselves should lead by example, treat others with sincerity and kindness, treat the begging elderly, give a little money, give other help to those in need, and be filial to their parents, and their children will follow their parents' example.
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Nowadays, however, parents attach great importance to their children's physical health and intellectual development, but pay little attention to whether their children care and are willing to help others.
1. Let children know how to care about others
As children grow up, we should focus on cultivating children's kind feelings, so that they can learn to balance their own needs with the needs of others. Therefore, parents should always emphasize in front of their children that they care for others and keep their promises, and affirm their children's caring and kind behavior towards others. For example, when a child is about to give up a team task, let him understand his responsibility to his friends and team, and encourage him not to give up easily, but to learn to face and solve problems.
2. Create opportunities for children to learn to care for and thank others
Caring for and thanking others is well established'One of the methods of interpersonal communication. Parents can use their role models to help their children learn and "imitate" how to care for others, and at the same time learn to show gratitude to those who care about them. Research shows that people who are accustomed to thanking others tend to be more warm-hearted, more tolerant, more compassionate and tolerant, and happier and healthier.
So, don't let your child take everything their parents do for granted. Only by learning to thank your parents can you thank others. Parents can also regularly call ** to care for their elders and teach their children to say some words of condolence.
3. Expand the scope of children's care
Almost all children care about a small range of family and friends. Our challenge is to help children learn not to be self-centered and to learn to care about people outside of this circle. Parents can give it a try and always ask their children about their school, their impressions of classmates, etc., to ensure that they maintain a friendly and grateful attitude towards everyone in their daily lives.
When teachers and classmates are sick, ask the children to take the initiative to give condolences and encourage them to care for the vulnerable.
4. Parents should be role models for their children
Children observe the behavior of adults they respect and thus form moral values, so the words and actions of parents play a crucial role in whether children can form the right values. For parents to be role models for their children, they must be honest, fair, and caring for others. Taking children to see their relatives often can help them learn to respect their elders.
Husbands and wives should respect each other and establish good moral "models".
5. Instruct children to control destructive emotions
Anger, shame, jealousy, or other negative emotions often impair the ability to care for others, so self-control is an important part of building a child's good character. Parents need to teach their children that any emotion is normal and that they just learn to deal with negativity in a constructive way. When a child has negative emotions, parents should help him calm down, such as taking a deep breath.
Then listen to your child's negative emotions and help him divert his attention and "digest" the negative emotions.
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Screenwriter Bai Bonnie said in "Wonderful Sayings": "Kindness is very precious, but kindness does not grow teeth, that is, weakness." ”
That's right, kindness without fangs is cowardice, and goodness without edge is weakness. In real life, there are many examples of being full of kindness but being let down, and being kind enough to help others but suffering a lot.
A compulsory course in life teaches children to arm their teeth with kindness, not to be a "good old man", to learn to refuse boldly, and to learn to distinguish people's hearts.
Parents should pay attention to educating their children as soon as possible, and don't let their children suffer and break their hearts in the process of interacting with others.
Kindness is precious, stop letting those wicked people continue to wantonly consume children's kindness.
Tell the childKindness is not weakness, and gentleness is not compromiseIn this noisy world, grow up unhurriedly, with ease, health and happiness.
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You should find opportunities to tell your child about the dark side of society.
You can't have the heart to harm others, but you can't have the heart to defend people.
We need to teach our children to be kind, but we can't help but tell them what society really is.
Otherwise, when they grow up, they will encounter disillusionment, it turns out that society is completely different from what I learned in school and what I learned in books!
I want my children to be generous and kind, and I have been raised in this way, but as a result, I am very uncomfortable.
My son uses a pen with better quality, and other classmates know that it is easy to use, so they borrow it and don't buy it, because it is too expensive. Several classmates have teased and asked if they can buy it in **, but they haven't seen anyone buy it. My son's big dictionary has been used several times, because it has become common in the class, and other classmates don't bring it.
He brought a lot of extracurricular books, homework books, workbooks, pencils and erasers, etc., and he was afraid that some classmates would borrow them. My son often memorizes the extracurricular books at home to school and lends them to his classmates, I don't feel sorry for the books, I feel sorry for his shoulders, the books are too heavy.
He often helps his classmates buy things on his behalf, and then there are often people who can't collect the money.
How about helping people like that? Let's take one thing as an example, when he was on duty, he didn't even have anyone to help, and no one even waited for him for a while.
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Honor your parents, pay for your parents, read the books of ancient sages, read the Dharma.
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This is really a thought-provoking and good question, I am a mother of a 5-year-old child, and my work is also related to children's education, so I would like to share my thoughts.
Kindness and reality should not be opposites, "reality" in Chinese with a little derogatory, in fact, I want to replace the "reality" in the problem with "dexterity", which refers to determining their own coping strategies according to the actual situation, which is also the meaning of reality, but in other words, is it much more comfortable and easier to accept?
Kindness is like a dove, and dexterity is like a snake. Kindness must be matched with wisdom and wisdom, our kindness must be flexible, there must be a bottom line, we teach children to be kind at the same time, we must teach children to be dexterous, otherwise, such kindness will definitely be used by others, and it will not last.
Dexterity refers to dealing with problems flexibly, knowing how to distinguish whether a thing will cause harm to oneself, rather than doing things that make us unhappy and potentially hurt oneself according to a rule, a principle and a truth.
The Korean movie "So Won", based on real events: An 8-year-old girl, out of kindness, helped a drunk uncle hold an umbrella in the heavy rain, but in exchange for inhumane abuse, she lived with a urine bag for life, but the criminal was only sentenced to 12 years.
It's unbearable to put pictures.
After becoming a mother, people become very vulnerable, and they dare not watch videos and social news that hurt their children, and they can't bear to watch them, they are angry, distressed, and as if they are torn apart.
Alas, back to the point, after being hurt, Su Yuan asked: Did I do something wrong?
Child, you didn't do anything wrong, it's just that this society is very complicated, not all good people like us, and there are bad people who will take advantage of our kindness and hurt people.
As parents, when teaching their children to be kind, they must also tell their children to be dexterous and know how to distinguish, so that they will not suffer so many losses, so that they can always do good things under the impetus of happiness.
In the process of parenting, every mother must often encounter a kind vs realistic choice, and I encountered it last weekend, just a small life thing, but it involves a kind and realistic choice.
After taking Go lessons, taking the bus to swimming lessons, our mothers and sisters had seats, and gradually there were more people on the bus, many people could only stand, and my 5-year-old son asked me in a low voice: Mom, should we give up a seat for my aunt?
Me: Don't worry, you want to give up your seat to your aunt, this is a great idea, but you don't need to give up your seat to your aunt, the objects that need to be given up are the old, young, sick, disabled and pregnant, who do these 5 types refer to?
Dunton: The old are the elderly, the young are the children, the sick are the sick, the disabled are the disabled, and the pregnant are pregnant women.
Me: And who are you? Who is Auntie?
Donton: I'm a child, and my aunt is an adult, so I don't need to give up my seat to her.
Me: That's right, you are a toddler who needs to be taken care of, and Auntie is an adult who can take care of herself, so you don't need to give up your seat to Auntie. Mom also needs to sit on the side to take care of the mountain next to you, and Mom doesn't need to give up her seat to other adults.
If there are other old and young people in the car, sick and pregnant, and no one else is willing to give up their seats, your mother can give up your seat, but the premise is that you have to sit firmly and protect yourself.
Donton: Mom, I see. Me:
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The ultimate goal of educating children is kindness.
What is kindness, kindness is to be full of kindness to the world after experiencing human suffering.
Kindness, the most beautiful and precious thing in the world, should take root in childhood, otherwise it will never be cultivated. It is necessary to cultivate children's kind character from an early age.
The principal of Eton College in the United Kingdom once said, "A truly elite education, in addition to allowing children to achieve outstanding results, the most important thing is to let them learn to accept others and respect their differences." ”
Harvard University advocates that the system should be less concerned about children's grades and skills, and more attention should be paid to students' caring for others.
While we send our children to various training classes, we should not ignore the children's kindness education, and if the children have the ability to design a new product, we should remind the children of "science and technology for good".
In the process of cultivating children's kindness, the definition of kindness must keep pace with the times and have a correct understanding.
Kindness is not the same as being a good old man who swallows his anger, and kindness is not a soft persimmon to be pinched by others. Kindness is a choice, a value, an aura from the inside out.
In the past, when we evaluated a person's kindness, we often said that he knew how to "forbear", which was incomplete, and the premise of kindness was not to offend others, and at the same time not to wronged himself. Based on the above viewpoint, we must not be biased in educating our children.
I obviously have an opinion on a certain thing or a certain practice, but I am unwilling or afraid to put it forward, so I follow the crowd, sulk, and even get hurt because of it. We need to remind our children that all kindness must be something that makes them comfortable, and if not, it is hypocrisy, and it is better not to.
Modern education requires us to update our views in a timely manner, which is too much imitation, and reading books to update knowledge is a good way. We need to teach our children to respect and care for others while respecting and protecting themselves, which is the basic definition of kindness.
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Parents should educate their children to have a correct view of the outside world's evaluation of themselves. For good words, you can listen to them and learn from them; Don't pay too much attention to unpleasant words, and overturn them through self-reflection and self-sublimation.