Another essay that requires an IELTS angle score

Overall, the writing is okay, and it can be seen that it is very serious, if you use the standard of IELTS to evaluate:

task response, there is a clear point of view, but it's a bit messy, like when talking about the reason in the middle, there should be first, second, such words, reflecting logic. In addition, the number of words is seriously exceeded, LZ has not been mock tested, usually in the exam room is not enough time to write so many words! Learn how to write more concisely.

The coherence and cohesion structure is well organized, but there are no transition sentences, it is not coherent enough, and the second paragraph is too long, which affects the balance of the overall structure.

Lexical Resource Some words are used well, such as laid a good foundation, job hunting, but it can be seen that there is no memorization of the usage when looking up the dictionary or memorizing words, like entail, fanatical, on them own money, are used incorrectly... It is advisable not to pursue flowery words, but rather to use the words you are most sure of. Examiners will prefer simple but correct language.

grammatical range and accuracy, but there are a lot of basic grammatical mistakes, like sentence structure, singular and plural, which can make your essay drop a lot.

It is recommended to rewrite it yourself according to the IELTS scoring criteria, which will improve a lot.

If you take it for grading, it's a bit difficult to get a score, and it takes a lot of effort.

4 criteria. The style of academic writing is required.

Grading Criteria: Essay 1 examines the candidate's ability to select the most important and relevant information (some minor information can be ignored) in a chart or ** and describe this information clearly, and the examiner will rate the candidate's ability to organize this information and the accuracy of the language used.

Aim at least 150 words or you will be deducted points.

A one-stop study abroad guide.

It's still 5 in essence, but it's a slightly better kind written in 5. For example, 6 points not only require that there are no errors in grammar, but also require that the article is reasonably structured and logically rigorous, and 5 points require that there should not be too many errors in grammar. So if your syntax is very, very good, but the logical proof is not strong, then you are only points.

It's been a long time since I've read or written a small essay. But I still want to give you some personal advice. It's not very well written, but it's not bad either.

It is not bad because your article meets the most basic requirements of a small essay, that is, I can draw this bar chart by looking at the article (believe me, many people can't even do this, and there are many people who can't match the IELTS examiner when they look at the article and the original picture).

There are many reasons why it is not good. Let's talk about your beginning first, there is no role in the beginning. The opening chapter needs to explain a few points:

What is this diagram (you have, bar), what is drawn on the diagram (you didn't write it accurately enough: it's not time, it's usage; Not three categories, but three different types of telecommunication methods; not from 1995 to 2002, but in 1995, 1999 and 2002 respectively; What does the picture illustrate (you didn't write it, have a small summary, tell the examiner what the main problem of your small essay is.)

Besides, don't say anything about your ending, don't say anything about the grammar, these are personal habits, there is no right or wrong. But what you say is too superficial, and it's not accurate enough, most popular doesn't seem to be good enough here, and it weakens the mobile surge that you really want to talk about later. The end should highlight Mobile's market share constantly**.

This brings us to your analysis of the whole text.

There is nothing wrong with the text analysis, but it is still the appearance. The most test of a small essay is comparison, especially bar, line, and the like. You're just talking about the numbers above, and you're not even talking about the basic percentage or anything like that, only a few multiples of the same year.

What's more, I didn't see the deeper meaning of the chart, such as the original mobile share, and the market share in 2002, which is more convincing than the numbers; In addition, if you add the usage in the same year, you can find that the total usage of telecommunications in the UK has risen from 103 to 180, almost double, indicating the development of UK telecommunications.

In my humble opinion, please forgive me for any mistakes and omissions.

IMHO, in my opinion, if the total score is 30 points, you can score 15 points at most and deduct 15 points.

7 No problem 1The introduction is very clear, there is conditioning 2Grammar and sentence patterns are diverse3Rich vocabulary.