When I go back to my in laws house for dinner, my husband always asks me to wash the dishes, is it

Seeing the subject's confiding and trouble, maybe you feel that your husband doesn't understand you, and you also cooperate with him, but for failing to do his requirements once or twice, he gives you an evaluation of laziness, which makes you very uncomfortable.

From the subject's text description, the subject's husband usually helps with housework, and it can be seen that the subject's husband is still a more considerate person, so why is this happening between you?

Different views, different ideas, different understandings.

In the subject's husband's opinion, it is a normal thing for the subject to do housework, although his father is a person who does not do housework, but he has not learned enough from his father, he will also help with housework at home, in his opinion, housework is everyone's business, since the mother cooks, then someone has to share the dishes.

It's not that the subject doesn't want to wash the dishes, but he thinks that washing the dishes is not a big deal, and he is usually willing to help wash it, and occasionally when he doesn't want to wash, his husband will evaluate you as lazy at the time, so he will deny what you have done and paid before, which makes you feel uncomfortable, so you are not willing to implement the requirements in his heart.

It is precisely because men and women think differently that you have differences in looking at the same thing, and it is not difficult to solve this problem.

1. Communicate

For the husband, I believe that more than just washing the dishes makes the subject have ideas in his heart, and the husband's thought is not what the subject wants, so in other things, if the husband also has this attitude, it is easy to cause conflicts between you.

You can communicate more if you have nothing to do, ask your husband why he usually has to do this, what is his purpose, and does he take too much care of your feelings in order to achieve this purpose?

Be a listener first, don't be in a hurry to express your grievances, listen to your husband's words and then think about whether his ideas are reasonable, if they are unreasonable, you can put forward some of your own ideas, so that each other can find the best solution, rather than preferring not to go to your in-law's house because of a situation like this.

2. Be aware of your emotions

It stands to reason that the mother-in-law cooks and the subject washes the dishes, this is a very small thing, even if the husband doesn't call it, you can do it yourself, so why do you complain in your heart after your husband tells you to do it?

Your real emotions are not because of washing dishes, you are just using this matter to vent your emotions, what is the dissatisfaction, I believe that only the subject himself knows, only the real emotional problems can be solved.

3. Know how to relieve yourself

Maybe there is a conflict with your husband, or maybe it's taking children day after day that makes you tired of this kind of life, and there is pressure invisibly, and the pressure needs to be released, otherwise ignoring the pressure sometimes accumulates for a long time and will crush a person.

The subject said that his husband will also help him do housework, so he can also negotiate to find time for him to help take care of the children, take some time out to do what he likes to do, get stress relief from it, go shopping, get together with friends, exercise appropriately, etc., and find a suitable solution for yourself.

May my help to the subject, best wishes.

Of course not, such behavior may be a kind of disrespect to you by the other party, and it will also affect your family status, or cause you to be bullied by your in-laws in the future.

Of course not, if you don't brush it, it means that you are very tired from work today, you can talk to your husband.

I don't think it's lazy, there is no rule that you have to wash the dishes, you have your own choice, and it is wrong for my wife to do this.