Children cry when they lose, how can parents let their children develop good habits?

There are many children who cry and fuss when they lose a game or competition, and even refuse to participate in similar activities later.

This is what we call "can't afford to lose".

The awareness of winning and losing is not a bad thing in itself, it is normal to be afraid of losing or not liking to lose, and no one will compete to lose.

We need to know more about the character of children who "can't afford to lose", what kind of character is easy to become when they grow up?

In the face of a child's character of "crying when he loses", parents will always say that "the child is still young and ignorant", using this wrong idea to help the child clear his fault, and at the same time let the child use our excuse to escape perfectly.

The punishment that needs to be borne by oneself after the mistake occurs, but I don't know that the parents' big package makes the child think from the bottom of his heart that he does not need to bear any consequences, even if he knows that he has done wrong, someone will naturally help him bear it, and slowly rely on his parents, becoming a person who has no ideas, no ability, and no responsibility. Over time, it will leave a bad impression on the classmates and teachers around you, and when you grow up, you will form the character of what we often call "soft persimmon".

What can parents do to make their children confident and strong?

1. Give your child a sense of security.

In fact, everyone in an unfamiliar environment, let alone children, will have insecurities. Children belong to the disadvantaged group in society, and if you want your children to grow up and not fall into this vulnerable state, then you need to give your children enough security, and the most direct sense of security is the companionship, protection and trust of parents for their children.

2. Affirm your child's efforts.

In the variety show "Mom is Superman", the 5-year-old Dalinzi was always at a disadvantage in the boxing match, and was knocked to the ground by his opponent many times, but he stood up again and again with tenacity and continued to fight.

After three first rounds, Da Linzi lost in suspense without any problem, he hid in the arms of a mother Deng Sha with a lonely face and did not speak, looking like he was about to cry.

Deng Sha praised Da Linzi at that time for being amazing, even if he was knocked down, he would still persevere to the end, and told him that his mother was happy for him, and Da Linzi's mood gradually improved.

3. Teach by example.

For children, the attitude and perception of parents is the most important. Usually we don't want to show dissatisfaction with our children. When children encounter some difficulties and setbacks, comfort and care for them in a timely manner; Let children feel the love and help of their parents all the time.

This will neither lose your child's self-confidence nor weaken their ability to accept setbacks.

4. Let the children understand the truth in the story.

The best way to develop a strong character is to teach your child to accept failure in real life. If the child falls, don't rush over to help him up, and don't tell him "forget it, if we can't do it, we won't do it" or just know how to encourage "child, you are already very good, it's not that you're bad, it's that your mother makes it too difficult for you to do this".

It is necessary to teach children to win and lose. As long as it's a game, there will be wins and losses, and as long as we put in the effort, even if we lose, it's not terrible. It only shows that our opponents are strong and we should work harder.

Let the child have enough security, because every child will have a feeling of insecurity in an unfamiliar environment, and the sense of security is the companionship and protection of parents and trust. Acknowledge your child's efforts, and don't want him to hit him with everything he does.

In the process of guidance, parents can guide their children to do something in the right way. Although you lose, you can tell your child that if you lose, you will lose in **, and don't make this mistake again next time.

I don't know if your child has such a thing, whether it is in kindergarten or with the student's parents, you can't lose, once the child realizes that he has lost, he will cry and play scoundrel, which is a headache. When the child loses, he plays a scoundrel, no matter what method he uses, he must win, in the end, he is competitive, although he is blinded by winning or losing? Furthermore, is the concept of winning or losing innate, or is it an acquired good habit?

Let's take a look.

How do children develop good habits of winning and losing?

Children's desire to win and lose is naturally learned, and basically passed on by parents and teachers, children are born with a blank slate, there is no concept of winning or losing, they are simple and interesting, and enjoy the happiness that every new thing brings me. But as the child grows up, parents place hope on their children, and compare their children with others again and again, and in the long run, you will find that children will subconsciously feel: winning is a very honorable thing, losing is a very bad thing.

How to make children treat winning and losing calmly?

First of all, when you play games with children, you don't have to let your children do everything, the important thing about this game is not who wins, but to let children learn to admit defeat, let me learn some experience from failure, and understand how to be diligent next time. Only children who have experienced unsuccess will know how to overcome difficulties and have the courage to start again.

Let the child face the problem of winning and losing.

It is a good thing to be competitive, it can be the strength of the child to move forward, but all people cannot help but experience failure, so for the child, it is more important than "winning" to let him "afford to lose", teaching the child "losing is losing, we should accept this thing." Blindly trying to quickly dissuade the release of his negative emotions, he will become more and more unable to play.

Motivate your child to be proactive and self-improving.

In order to make children afford to lose, it is a very important part of cultivating children, and it is also very important to treat children correctly and treat wins and losses, which is also very important for the cultivation of children's perseverance. The key is to let children look at things with a heart that goes all out, and do their best to obey the destiny of God, even if the conclusion is not satisfactory, the spiritual essence of hard work is very important.

Remember to lead the child to summarize.

In addition to letting the child feel the whole process of losing, you also need to remember to help the child build confidence, the key is to adjust the mentality after the disappointment, and set sail again. Being able to communicate with your child will not only increase the distance between you and your child, but also let him know that victory and defeat are common things, and the key is how to break through himself again after failure, so that the child's personality can become more and more resolute.

First, let the child cry for a while and reflect on it. Second, tell your child that there is bitterness before sweetness, don't be afraid of losing, and you can win next time; Third, give your child enough security to rely on even if he loses.

In this case, the only way to do this is to make the child cry there. Sometimes the child also knows very well that he has been wrong, but he wants to use this way to achieve his own goals, and we cannot let the child go.

Parents must be calm when educating their children, if the child is crying and playing Laipi, at this time parents should strictly stop it, should not be comforted in time.

For such a child, we must cultivate his independence and autonomy, and I can't help him do everything, but I want the stall boy to learn to let him do it himself.

Be sure to constantly encourage your child to be strong, and sometimes you have to keep a certain distance from your child so that he can become independent.

Parents should communicate well with their children and be sure to improve their children's resilience so that they can make changes.

Don't worry about your child at first, let your child cry on his own. When children stop crying, their emotions are mild. At this point, they can communicate normally. Parents should come forward to comfort their children and tell them that they understand you.

Just watch him from the side, ignore him, wait for him to make enough trouble, stop making trouble and then reason with him, tell him that crying will not solve the problem, and if he crys, we as parents will not give him what he wants.

Ignore it, some children cry when they try to persuade the more they make a fuss, if they don't think there is anything, they cry for a few minutes and they will be fine.

1. Communicate with your child. There must be a reason why children cry non-stop, and parents only know that it is very derelict to let their children not cry without asking the reason. In this case, parents should first learn to communicate with their children, ask the reason for crying, there is a cause to have an effect, knowing the reason, it is much easier to solve the crying.

2. Distract your child's attention. If you know the reason and can't persuade your child, parents don't have to worry, you can try to divert your child's attention. The child is the most innocent creature in the world, it is very easy to coax, and giving her a delicious meal can stop the child's crying.

The child's attention span is very short, he was crying just now, and he will laugh when he sees something he likes, and parents should not worry too much about the child.

3. Ignore the child's crying. Some children are coaxed by their parents to cry non-stop, like this kind of children, parents directly amplify the courage to ignore it, no matter how fierce the child cries, the wild relatives ignore him, the indifferent way to deal with it is not to love him, just to let him understand: crying can not solve the problem.