Why is you an older sister, you have to let your younger brother raise a brother demon , and hurt

Parents will think that as the eldest in the family, they should have the obligation to take care of their younger siblings, but some parents may forget that the eldest in the family is also a child, and too many rules about them can cause harm to the child's mentality. The sister-brother combination is the ideal way for many parents to have a second child, because the elder sister can take care of the younger brother, and when she was a child, she hoped that her sister would let her eat and wear, and when she grew up, she hoped that her sister would give money and things.

But like this sentence "You are also a sister, you want to let your younger brother", what kind of child's heart is broken, the palms of the hands and the backs of the hands are full of meat, please let the younger brother protect the younger sister when teaching the younger sister to let the younger brother. They must have been spoiled by their parents, but due to the arrival of their younger brother, they were ignored by their parents and even suffered psychological trauma in their differences.

In that way, children will be able to do a lot of things that are not genuinely willing to do things for the sake of love, to understand the needs of their parents and to understand how to make them happy. so that they get very little care, they can't believe that they love unconditionally, and they have the level to love others; But when others treat themselves well, they will feel uneasy, and they will try their best to gain several times the amount of love, and then they will scare off the other party as a matter of course. And this kind of teaching method is also very easy to cultivate the "brother demon" that we often say, and even feel that my life exists for my younger brother.

In this type of family, parents need to pay attention to the way of home education.

Many parents have a mindset that older children must give way to younger children. If the child does not do this, he is not sensible. But for children, this perception is very unequal.

Maybe at first, the child will continue to understand why, but in the long run, the older sister will get used to this kind of request, until finally, the younger brother's needs can not be refused, and even think that what they are doing is right.

Girls are born to be more sensible than boys, and their nature will gradually flood unconsciously, and the sisters of many families unconsciously take special care of their younger brothers, and the younger brothers are used to the care of their sisters, and their parents must let their younger brothers understand that everything their sisters do is not what they should be, and that younger brothers should not rely too much on their sisters, and that they should grow up as an individual themselves.

Parents' ideas for their children should be respected, and if there are areas where things are inappropriate, what parents should do is to try to communicate and guide them correctly, rather than denying and blaming them impetuously. It is even more incorrect to make do with the child, which will make the child more repulsive and will not be beneficial to the creation of a parent-child relationship. In the case of two or more children in a family, parents must pay attention to the way of family education, and do not cause the shadow of the child's life due to the improper way of family education.

There is no measure for doting on his brother.

In traditional thinking, there is a concept called patriarchy, in ancient times, patriarchy, just because men are needed to inherit the family business, and in modern society, there are also some families with this kind of thinking, the first characteristic of helping the younger brother is that in the second-child family, the sister has lost herself, ignoring the fact that she is a child, and doting on her brother without a scale, has surpassed a normal sister's love for her brother, and seems to have become the second mother of her brother.

Yes, it hurts the two children, for the elder sister she has been thinking about her younger brother all her life, but it is also a very bad thing for the younger brother, it is easy to make the younger brother lawless.

Because the children educated in this way may also hurt their sister, and it will also lead to a bad relationship between the two children.

Everyone is afraid of "helping the younger brother", but many parents, especially those in rural areas, want their daughter to be a "helping the younger brother", but they don't know that this will not only spoil their son, but also hinder their daughter's marriage and the development of a small family.

And many daughters who are not loved and consumed often crave the recognition and love of their parents, and the more they are "pretending to be sensible" and trying their best to meet their parents' requirements. As everyone knows, some families are like a bottomless pit that cannot be filled.

As a woman, you still have to refuse when you should. Of course, you have to lend a helping hand when your mother's family is really in trouble, but there is really no need to be responsible for daily expenses, the more you do, the heavier the dependence of your parents and younger brother will be. Life is difficult, but you still have to manage yourself well before you have the spare energy to help your family.

So as a parent, how should you deal with your relationship with your children? Many parents ignore that in fact, a large part of the disharmony in the relationship between their children is due to themselves.

For example, the partiality of parents, preference for sons, endless "exploitation" of children for their sons, etc., will cause inequality in the psychology of children. There are even some families who kick the issue of their parents' pension back and forth like a ball between siblings.

Many parents are more patriarchal, and in China, I am still more traditional.

They all think that their daughters will get married, and they can't support their parents in vain when they are old, they will feel that their sisters should help their younger brothers.

Especially in many rural areas, the phenomenon of preference for sons over daughters is particularly serious, parents will always feel that they are old, relying on the son will not be the daughter Chi Feng's daughter to marry far, they will also test their parents for the rest of their lives, they will always feel that they are old, relying on the son will not be a daughter, the daughter will marry far away, and they will not be able to rely on the source for a lifetime.

No, I will only help my brother appropriately, help him when he is in trouble, everyone will be bored with their own family will also have their own responsibilities, and you can't take your brother's responsibilities on yourself, that will only make your brother feel that it is natural for your brother to bend the boy, and your family will not be able to withstand your brother's blood-sucking dependence on you, and eventually your family will be shattered.

No, proper foil is a must, Voldemort is excessive. It also indirectly harmed him and directly affected his own life.

Many men actually have a certain misunderstanding of helping the younger brother, thinking that unconditional helping the younger brother is helping the younger brother, which is just a way of helping the younger brother, and not all helping the younger brother is a manifestation of the younger brother.

You can follow my perspective and first understand why women have become demons to help their brothers, and are they really willing?

The first point is that it is a woman's misfortune to be born in a patriarchal family.

I can't say that there is no such family where parents treat their children equally and educate their children to support and take care of each other, but most families will have a clear preference for sons over daughters, and more resources are spent on boys, and girls are told to let their younger brothers (older brothers) from an early age.

The daughters of patriarchal families are unfortunate, they have been squeezed out of value by their parents since they were young to help their sons, and they started housework earlier than boys, matured earlier, and were worn off the edges and corners earlier, and had no sense of resistance.

Women grow up in such an environment, and the hearts of girls have long been accustomed to giving good things to their younger brothers (elder brothers) first, and even if they grow up, they will realize that they are not doing it right, but their inner psychology has been cultivated, and it is difficult for them to make changes, so even if they get married, they will help their younger brothers (elder brothers) unconditionally.

The second point is that there is no bottom line for helping loved ones.

If a woman is married and refuses to help her parents and siblings, then such a ruthless woman will not be a good lead slag daughter, and she will not be a good wife and mother in the future.

It is actually very normal for a woman to choose to help her relatives and help her younger brother (elder brother), but this kind of help should have a bottom line, and it should be based on her own ability, not after helping, making her life difficult.

Women help their families, they should know how to teach people to fish, it is better to teach people to fish, unconditional help can only be temporary, they still have a family, not Huai stool can help for a lifetime; It should be to help the family find a solution to the problem.

The difference between a brother demon and a woman who normally helps her relatives is obvious, that is, she can correctly distinguish whether she is teaching someone to fish or teaching someone to fish.

The third point is that I don't know how to distinguish the line.

As mentioned earlier, when a woman gets married, she should still know how to help her family, and she should have a bottom line to help, which also involves a problem, that is, women don't know how to divide the line.

That is, when I got married, I didn't know that the relationship between myself and my younger brother (elder brother) had changed, although it was still a serum, but both parties had already formed a family, and at this time they already belonged to two families, they should belong to relatives, and they and their husbands were relatives.

A woman who knows how to distinguish boundaries is conditional help; I don't know that dividing the boundaries is unconditional help, and I feel that I am a family anyway, and I should help no matter how I help, but I ignore my husband's feelings and ignore my family, which is the behavior of helping my brother.

No, it's not helping him hurt him, making him feel that he will never have to work hard to have everything, because someone is helping him.