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<> what parents all want most is that their children can live happily, as long as their children are happy, they will definitely be successful. Because every parent wants their children to be happy and take good care of themselves.
Especially women, don't want your husband to say whatever she wants, and pay more attention to proportions when she is at her in-law's house, many parents will remind their daughters that these four things must not be done at her in-law's house, because it is thankless!
1. Do not participate in the conflict between in-laws.
As a daughter-in-law, you must be clear about your identity in your in-law's family, although you are now a family, you are not related by blood after all. So it's best to pay attention to some behaviors, after getting married, you are no longer a little princess who is pampered by your parents, many things are not what you want to do, and you can't say what you want to say, so it's best to pay attention to your words and deeds.
If you are a smart woman, you will definitely not participate in the affairs between your mother-in-law and father-in-law, one is not to say that your father-in-law is not in front of your mother-in-law, and the other is not to say that your mother-in-law is not in front of your father-in-law, so that you can appear to be very sensible. Even if there is a conflict between them, it is better not to get involved, it is better to turn a blind eye.
2. Don't get involved in the affairs between your husband's brothers and sisters.
Many married women feel that their parents-in-law are too partial, only taking care of their children and not caring about themselves at all. So they will say that they are not in front of their husbands, but no matter what, it is their own business who they want to be good to, no matter how dissatisfied you are, don't say these things in front of your husband, after all, it is their own business, and what you say will make your husband think that you are too stingy.
Therefore, if it is a matter of the husband's brothers and sisters, whether a wise woman is involved or not, let alone make irresponsible remarks, will not be passed on to the ears of her in-laws, and there will not be so many contradictions, and the relationship between relatives can be handled calmly.
3. Don't hide from your in-laws to help your mother-in-law's family.
If the mother's family is in difficulty, the best way is to discuss with the mother-in-law, and then work together to come up with a solution, then I believe that the mother-in-law's family will not be too much, after all, helping the mother's family is what the daughter should do, and she can't be too fully committed. But if you ignore your husband's feelings because you help your mother's family too much, and the whole family is in chaos, it will also hurt the feelings between husband and wife.
If the consequences are more serious, there will be a breakdown of the marriage, and there will be a lot of conflicts with the in-laws. Therefore, if you want to support your mother's family, you must consult with your husband so that you can get his consent to act, so that it will not lead to quarrels and divorce.
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These four things must not be done in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law: one is to complain to your husband about your mother-in-law; second, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law quarrel; the third is that the husband and wife quarrel in front of the mother-in-law; The fourth is to interfere in the life of the mother-in-law.
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Take money with your mother-in-law, beat your husband in front of your mother-in-law, don't clean up, dislike your mother-in-law's cooking is not good, borrowing money from your mother-in-law shows that you have no ability to make money, beating your husband in front of your mother-in-law feels that your son is being bullied, not cleaning means that you don't love cleanliness will be disliked, and dislike your mother-in-law's cooking will give people a feeling of disrespect for their elders.
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Speaking ill of your mother-in-law, sowing discord, and complaining with others are all inappropriate and inappropriate practices, especially with your husband.
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The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is actually about a hard up, one has to be soft, when the other party is angry, we resolutely do not get angry and do not get angry, after all, if you are angry and angry, then you will quarrel, when the other party is angry, we are not angry, when we are angry, we should look at the problem rationally How to solve the problem is the most correct way, not like a roaring beast. 4 iron laws, then it is mutual respect, mutual tolerance, mutual understanding, for the good of everyone, there may be some differences in ways and methods, but we must pay attention to seeking common ground while reserving differences.
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Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can also communicate more and respect each other's living habits; First of all, we must learn to respect the elders, our country has the traditional virtue of respecting the old and loving the young since ancient times, and the contradiction between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law is mainly the husband, to care for the husband in front of the mother-in-law, but also to learn to do housework appropriately, which will make the relationship between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law more harmonious, and learn to pretend to be stupid, don't worry about it in the family.
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Both parties care for each other, understand each other, tolerate each other, and trust each other, but try not to interfere in privacy and life; Be more helpful, more understanding, more tolerant, more caring, and less interfering in life.
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For the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, if you want to get along, you must respect, trust, understand, and tolerate each other in your daily relationship, and you must also know how to consider the problem from the other party's point of view, create some romantic surprises for each other appropriately, and create some romantic surprises for him as much as possible on the other party's birthday.
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Some mothers-in-law can't see their daughters-in-law go to work, but they are heartbroken, and the children are very stressed to support the family alone. Sasha's mother-in-law is like this, Sasha wants to resign before getting married, and she leaves her job to plan for her wedding.
Until after getting married, because the market was not very good, Sasha didn't find a good job, so she planned to rest for a while. Anyway, I still have some savings, which is enough for a period of time, and I am worried that if I really can't find a suitable job, then I will simply prepare to have a child in advance, and I will talk about it until I have a child. But what he didn't expect was that since she got married, her mother-in-law often called her **, asking her if she was looking for a job and when she was looking for a job.
And openly and secretly reminded her that she usually doesn't have to spend money like running water, she has to save a little, after all, it is really not easy for her husband to support the family alone. At the beginning, when she received her mother-in-law's **, Sasha felt that she cared about her very much, and with the increasing number of **, she came to Sasha's house from time to time without any knowledge of the silver limbs. Sasha began to dislike this mother-in-law from the bottom of her heart.
Finally, in a situation where they couldn't help it, the two of them had a corner of their mouths.
The mother-in-law scolded Sasha for being an idle person, not making money, living at home every day, spending money and spending money indiscriminately. Sasha said that the money spent was her own savings, and she didn't spend a penny on her husband. My mother-in-law feels that she is already married, so don't talk about yours and mine, anyway, she has all kinds of suggestions for Sasha not to go out to work.
Sasha has been hit hard, because he didn't expect that the relationship between his mother-in-law and daughter-in-law would be so difficult now, he was so disgusting and wanted to vomit, and he didn't know how to live in the future.
It is very likely that the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along very well when they have no children, but when they have children and the daughter-in-law is in confinement, the two will have many differences. After Xiaoping got married, her mother-in-law urged her to have a child, and she felt that her mother-in-law was quite good, and agreed with satisfaction, and she also needed to have a child as soon as possible. It wasn't until Xiaoping was pregnant and gave birth to confinement that Xiaoping understood that she couldn't really get along with her mother-in-law.
Because of her mother-in-law's thrift, Xiaoping wanted to find a confinement sister-in-law to serve the confinement child, but was rejected by her mother-in-law, and her mother-in-law felt that there was no need to spend this money, she could serve well. Xiaoping believed her mother-in-law's words, until she was indeed gradually confined, and Xiaoping's intestines were repentant. Because the food cooked by her mother-in-law is not delicious, and she does not follow these scientific and reasonable postpartum confinement meals at all, she completely relies on her previous work experience with Xiaoping's husband, and she is still righteous.
Especially at night, the mother-in-law said that she snored and would fall asleep to them, regardless of Xiaoping and the children. Her husband was busy with work, and Xiaoping took care of the children by herself for several nights, and Xiaoping didn't recover well, so she had to take care of the baby like this. So a lot of sticking points came down.
Since then, Xiaoping's attitude towards her mother-in-law has also changed dramatically, her mother-in-law forced Xiaoping to have a second child, Xiaoping pretended not to hear, and she didn't match at all, and the two of them were getting deeper and deeper.
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Look at how your mother-in-law treats your shirt when you don't have a job, what kind of attitude your mother-in-law has when you are confined, and whether your mother-in-law will take the initiative to help you take care of your children when there is no one to take care of them.
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In the event of a quarrel, if the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law who have a good relationship are Tuan Mintong who will not tear her face, in terms of treating her husband's mistakes, Guan Shutan's good mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship will criticize her husband.
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Look at whether you are willing to wash the scum clothes for the other party of the stove family, your mother-in-law's attitude towards you when there is no industrial sales, and whether your mother-in-law will help you watch the children, just try it in these little things.
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How to have a harmonious and beautiful family after marriage, a good relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is indispensable, and how to get along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law must be something that most women care about? Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law integration teaches you to do these 6 things:
1. Communicate more. For in-laws, whether you listen or not, try to listen. Insist on patiently laughing and telling stories with them, so that your parents-in-law have a stage to show, and don't show your impatience.
2. Always prepare some small gifts. To understand the preferences of your parents-in-law, it is best to have items that can be collected, such as beautiful wine glasses or baseball caps or beautiful decorations, which are very suitable and economical and affordable.
3. Don't preach.
Keep the "knowledge" to yourself, don't preach in front of the elders, who are older than you, even if you do have more insight than them on some things, then don't say, don't "educate" them, that will make them feel very uncomfortable.
4. Don't complain, always be grateful.
You have to always feel that staying in your mother-in-law's house is like staying in your own home, and even if you don't like their old-fashioned home, don't complain, it's not too difficult. Don't get bored with their nagging, mantras, prejudices, etc., and get along with them with gratitude.
5. Do work that is inconvenient for them to do.
For example, weeding the patio lawn, wiping the screen windows, asking someone to fix the air conditioner, etc., can not only be courteous but also show their thoughtfulness, make it easier for them to enjoy life, and at the same time make you a caring jacket in their hearts.
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Xiaoyun's mother-in-law has a very thorny problem, that is, men are inferior to women, and the mother-in-law doesn't look down on Xiaoyun for giving birth to a daughter, so after the baby is born, that is, she doesn't take care of her daughter-in-law, she doesn't take care of her granddaughter, and the second mother-in-law never gives Xiaoyun the attention she deserves. It is very obvious that the mother-in-law feels that she is in the lead, and Xiaoyun is manipulated by her, so to speak, the mother-in-law is the basic contradiction of Xiaoyun's family crisis.
Male superiority and inferiority of women is a kind of thinking of male superiority and inferiority, which has been significantly improved in recent years, but it is necessary to change this thinking, and everyone must work together to solve the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, first of all, it is necessary to understand each other, to recognize that the other party has an independent personality and economic strength of rent, and it is a fair relationship with each other. As a mother-in-law, don't always be arrogant in front of your daughter-in-law, you should see the advantages of your daughter-in-law, pay more attention to your daughter-in-law's suggestions, push yourself and others, naturally daughter-in-law should cultivate feelings with her mother-in-law, in addition to material filial piety, you need to pay attention to emotional communication with your mother-in-law, and often care and be considerate to your mother-in-law, so that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can get along in harmony.
From Xiaoyun's story, it is not difficult for us to find that her husband did not have a positive meaning in the relationship between his mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, he did not find out the contradiction between his mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in time, in other words, he didn't care at all, let their relationship be tense and indifferent, when his wife was angry with his mother-in-law, he had to let his wife take care of his mother-in-law, and I had no obligation to do my duty in marriage and family, and my wife not only did not pay attention to it after giving birth, but also gave birth to a child as a matter of his wife alone.
It is important to remember that in the mother-in-law relationship, the husband is the bridge between the mother-in-law and the wife, and the son plays an important role in the handling of the mother-in-law relationship. The husband can help the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to carry out psychological communication, such as what is the good thing about the mother-in-law at home on weekdays, the child recommends calling the wife out, the mother's birthday, buying something and asking the wife to come out and give it to the elderly, etc., in the relationship between husband and wife, the husband also needs to assume his own responsibilities and obligations, care for his wife and children, rather than only knowing how to work, and hand over his daily life and children to his wife.
Naturally, in this matter, Xiaoyun also has an inappropriate area, first, when Xiaoyun was wronged in such a family, and her husband didn't understand her, she didn't prepare herself well and chose to make do again. Secondly, Xiaoyun feels that she does not divorce for the sake of her children, and for the healthy and happy growth of her children, but in fact, if she is unhappy and often quarrels with her family, it may not be beneficial to her children's growth.
Marriage is a long-term theory created by two people under their own premise, the purpose is to build a warm home, when you find that the home is in crisis and it is clear that it cannot be remedied, it is best to break it off to avoid more damage and avoid adverse effects on children. It is best not to continue to destroy each other in an unhappy marriage because of the children, which also has a great impact on the children, although the children need a complete home, but they also need an atmosphere full of happiness.
The first is always suffering from gains and losses, checking each other's mobile phones, the second is a particularly strong desire to control, the third is that you just want to gain and don't want to pay, and the fourth is to love him to the point of losing himself.
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