My parents always make a lot of decisions for me, what should I do if I feel useless?

Both parents love us and make decisions for us. They decide what we want to do in the college entrance examination, they decide which unit we work in, they decide who we fall in love with, they even decide when we get married, and even when we should have children. Are your parents like that?

In fact, the love of our parents for us is the most unquestionable emotion in the world. No one wants us to be well off more than our parents.

However, is it really what our hearts want to go through this life according to the path prescribed by our parents?

In order not to make our parents sad, we compromise again and again, and every time in the dead of night, there is always a voice questioning: This is the life you want to live?

If you want to break free from the shackles of your parents, you can try to do so.

Step 1: Prove yourself

Nothing is more convincing than action. Your parents always make decisions for you because you are not independent enough. The first step you have to do is to prove that you are independent.

Strive to gain the appreciation of the boss at work, and properly arrange your own food, clothing, housing and transportation in life. It's good to let your parents see that you can do it alone. They won't have to worry anymore.

Step 2: Convince the parents

Have an in-depth conversation with your parents。Many people don't have the courage to do so, and they always feel that they don't know how to communicate with their parents, but it's actually very simple. You just have to be brave and honest with your innermost thoughts.

Speaking bluntly shows that you have grown up and no longer need your parents to make decisions for you, this is your life, and you need to take responsibility for your own life. No matter what the future holds, you can take responsibility for the outcome of your choice.

Step 3: When your parents want to intervene in your choice, tell them directly and trust your choice

In many cases, whether or not your parents make decisions for you also depends on your attitude. If you are ambiguous, then your parents will definitely think that you can't make up your mind and will make decisions for you. If you are very decisive, then your parents will see your determination and will not intervene too much.

Step 4: Don't have negative emotions when you make the wrong choice

You must know that everyone will experience a variety of choices in this life, and many decisions need to be made, and not every choice will be correct, and not every decision will be smooth. So once you make a wrong decision, don't give up on yourself and have negative emotions. It's about responding positively and making the right choices again.

After these four steps, I believe that your parents will slowly let go and let you go the rest of the road alone. You must also be prepared to take on everything. No one's life is smooth, take your courage and go on the road.

Try to learn to decide your own business, of course.

In life, no one's life is smooth sailing, they will encounter problems of one kind or another, when faced with these problems, what should we do? Idle? Sad?

Dysphoria? None of this is useful, and there is only one way to change the situation, and that is to find a solution and put it into action.

For you, I think, first of all, you should talk to your parents and tell them that you want to decide your own affairs and hope that they don't interfere. You also know that they love you, but you want to exercise yourself. Discuss with your parents first because you must be ruthless to yourself, and the help extended by your parents will make you waver.

Secondly, it is necessary to do the following:

1. Choose your own clothes when you buy them;

2. Find some questions to express your opinions;

3. In collective activities, the person who forces himself to be the leader;

4. In everything, consciously cultivate your own ability.

If you do these things, you will not only exercise your ability to make independent choices, but also exercise your ability to solve problems, and be able to deal with them calmly the next time you encounter a setback.

What kind of person do you want to become, and what kind of things do you want to do now? Let's take an example, just like a girl**, she always says, I want to **, but I can't help it when others eat, comfort myself, and I must start ** after eating this time. Day after day, it never starts, you are still you, you can't become the person you think you are.

So, when you encounter a problem, don't worry about it, but think about what you can do to solve it.

In this way, you will definitely exude a charming light and impress others.

In the eyes of our parents, even if we have gray hair, we are all children. They make decisions for us, which is a very happy thing for us, so that we can save a lot of time and energy. Remember, only the people who love you and care about you will rack their brains to think about what you do right and what is wrong, and then decide it all for you.

And after all, their parents are many years older than us, and their social experience and life experience are much richer than ours, after all, they have experienced all kinds of storms and waves, so their mentality and way of thinking about problems are more comprehensive than ours. We must admit that.

In fact, many times, when our parents make the next decision for us, we may feel that it is wrong at first, but in the end we will be grateful to them for this decision. When we make decisions, because we are young, we rarely think deeply, and we often have a hot brain, and then we decide to do this and that, or we see that this is better, and we want to do that. But that's not the case when parents make decisions for us.

We can always see what is in front of us, and we are too short-sighted. Because we are the people they love the most in the world, they always look at the whole thing when they think about it. They will take into account our factors and then choose the best one for us to do.

In fact, it is really a happy thing to have parents make decisions, because making decisions is a very painstaking thing, when we make decisions, we have to think a lot, such considerations will make our thoughts become disorganized, and even make us upset, sometimes a decision may make us feel like our heads are going to blow up. Think about it carefully, if our parents make decisions for us, we can save these troubles, take myself as an example, I am a person who is particularly afraid of trouble, I don't like to decide some things by myself, girls prefer to buy clothes, but all my clothes are bought for me by my mother, what she buys I wear, saving my time, but also satisfying her desire to shop, the best of both worlds.

If you feel that your parents make some decisions for you, so that you feel that your own ability is not good, so you will have such a feeling of incompetence, it can only show that in fact, it is not who made this decision for you and then affected your ability, but you are not confident in yourself. Your deep disagreement with yourself has caused you to think like this. No matter when, what decisions are made, and who makes the decisions, we have to trust ourselves.

Then make yourself useful, make yourself strong and independent. The first thing you have to do is refuse your parents' help and refuse to let them make decisions for you. And you have to try to be independent, to try to do those things on your own initiative, and to get used to taking those responsibilities.

Instead of passively staring at your parents to push yourself to be independent, give you how to be independent.

I prefer to be more proactive than to wait, and I also prefer to persuade you to work harder and be better for you. I look down on people who are depressed and chaotic, and I also look down on those who are weak and can only rely on others to live, I like people who are strong and independent like me, and I hope that everyone I meet can become this kind of person, including you. Passively accepting help and decisions from others will never make you who you are, so I suggest you make changes to make yourself more independent and empowered.

Secondly, you have to learn all kinds of things. How to get along with people, how to make decisions, and how to make the best decisions, let yourself understand these things. In fact, for ordinary people, such things are very simple and they are used to it, and the reason why you don't make decisions and don't deal with these things is simply because you haven't been exposed to such things before.

In fact, those are very simple things, and they are more simple than you can imagine and expect, and if you do, they will even catch you off guard - is it so simple that I used to try to avoid it?

Yes, that's right, as long as you get used to it. Because things in the real world are really not that hard. As long as you gradually allow yourself to be independent, you will no longer have this feeling.

Tell your parents that your daughter has grown up and it's time for herself to be independent, so don't make decisions for you. After all, they can't be with you for a lifetime, and if one day you go out, won't you have a hard time? So find a time to talk to your parents and they'll understand you.

As a parent, you always want your children to suffer less and be less tired, so they make too many decisions for you on your own, and you always go against the grain and never know how to resist, so that you feel useless when you cause the current situation. You haven't proven your abilities, so why are you so arrogant? Therefore, now is the time for you to raise objections with your parents, tell them, let them retreat into the background with peace of mind, and let you play your own stage, as long as you fire the first shot, I believe your parents will definitely let go.

So don't feel that you are incapable, ability is accumulated little by little in daily trivialities, as long as you have thoughts, motivation, you must have the ability, as long as your parents recognize you, I believe they will let you choose for yourself!

If you really follow the wishes of your parents no matter what decisions you make, it's really useless, after all, you are already an independent-minded adult when you grow up, and you have the ability to judge the whole thing and make decisions about yourself, and for your parents who love to help you give advice, we can listen to advice, as for everything to listen to, then it shouldn't be, it's more up to you to see what you think about the decisions you want to make, since you have realized that what you are doing is wrong, then be independent, Don't be like you were when you were a kid and couldn't make up your mind about anything.

Like to make decisions for their children has become a common problem for most parents in society now, they like to restrain the growth of their children since they were young, according to their own paved road for their children to let them go on and enjoy it, when they were young, they unconsciously did not have much impact, but when we really grow up, we will find that it is when we are young that everything depends on our parents, and the obedient characteristics of what they let us do are more and more so that parents think that this is what they should be. No matter what I do, my parents will ask me to make decisions that I don't like, and when I grew up, I knew that I couldn't always let them do it, and after communication, things improved.

In fact, we should have our own independent thinking ability and ability to act after adulthood, and can not rely on our parents to help us make various decisions in life, some things still rely on their own, for parents to take care of their own affairs, in fact, they are also used to helping you worry about it since childhood, and there is no need to be too anxious, feel that you are useless and may deny your ability, I suggest that you better communicate with your parents to understand your thoughts, I believe they will give you enough freedom to make decisions in life.

Parents must have a reason to make some decisions for us, because parents will not harm their children, and parents are from the past, they have a lot of life experience, so many times, it is also good for us to listen to our parents' advice. You shouldn't feel useless, because it's your parents who make the decisions, but it's us who work hard to do these things, and it's not easy for us to do what we need to do well.

In my life, from the very beginning, many things are decided by my parents, what language I speak, where I live, which school I go to, which high school I should go to, these many things my parents are making decisions for me, but these many things need to be done by me.

For example, if I want to go to a high school, there is a best high school in the city, and I used to aim for it, but my parents wanted me to take the best high school in the district that was a little worse than that high school, so I changed my goal, because it was true that my parents' decision was more reasonable, and the high school in the district, whether it was the distance, the campus, or the learning atmosphere, was my best choice.

What I want to express is that many of my parents' decisions are quite correct, and we don't need to feel useless, because that high school also requires me to work hard to get in, and if I don't study hard, how can I get there.

In addition, when parents make some decisions for us, we may not understand something, I will directly ask them why, I will learn the parents' thoughts, parents' experience, parents' carefulness in the process, this is also a good learning opportunity for me.

Moreover, if I have a better idea, I will consult with them directly, and then agree on it, and the parents are not unreasonable, on the contrary, they are more experienced.