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Girl, as an aside, you care too much about your boyfriend, and in your world, there is only your boyfriend, which is dangerous.
You've gone to his city for him, and you're trying to fit in with his circle of friends...
If there are a few in his circle of friends that you really appreciate and can talk to, then you can make friends with a few, and there is no need for his friends to be your friends. You have to build your own circle of friends. Participate in some activities, tutorial classes, improve yourself, enrich yourself at the same time, you can also meet a few friends, you also need your own friends, understand?
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Your questions are very common.
When I was in college, I was surrounded by people who were very eloquent and very good at bragging and telling jokes. I seem to be very inferior among them, and I don't know much about humor, for example, the people in the dormitory are gagging, laughing and scolding, and when it is my turn, I get stuck, I don't know how to answer, and I am not very familiar with things, and it is easy to offend people inexplicably.
I really envy those who are "self-cooked", and why can't I do it myself? I was distressed and didn't know what I was supposed to do to mingle with people.
The boy had been on the job for nearly two months, and apart from his colleagues in his department, he was almost unable to name anyone in the other offices, and even on several occasions, his colleagues mistook him for an intern. On weekdays, everyone's work is not easy, most of the time is buried in their respective grids, occasionally when the wind is interrupted, he ponders whether to participate, while considering when and in what way to interject in, and when he "brews", everyone's topic is just over. When colleagues gossip while working, he is often a "transparent person" who is overlooked.
People have the need to socialize with others, otherwise they will feel lonely, lonely, depressed, and anxious. However, people's ability to communicate is not innate, but is nurtured and consciously cultivated by the acquired environment.
To a new working environment, first of all, you can't be inferior and retreat, passively wait for others to take care of you, ask your needs, and help you, but should have an attitude of being willing to take the initiative to "join in the fun", others are playing, you can appreciate it; Others chat, you can listen, and then look for opportunities to join.
Don't be shy, don't be embarrassed to accept the care or help of others, just focus on yourself and work hard, the result is that things may not be done well, and people will think that you are very noble and unsociable. Rather than figuring it out on your own, it is better to take advantage of the free time when you first arrive and need to familiarize yourself with the situation first, observe and observe the working environment, such as whether the working atmosphere is open or conservative, whether the communication between colleagues is direct or subtle, etc., and then slowly and naturally integrate into it.
In addition, to join the circle of others, it is necessary to find common topics with others.
Those so-called "literary friends", "book friends", "song friends", etc., are all united by a common hobby. Therefore, learn to observe everyone's common topics and interests. Of course, you also need to learn some common sense and skills, and have the same fun of activities with others, so that you can share happiness.
It is also important to note that to expand one's circle, it is necessary to actively accept the invitation of others. In the party, you will have the opportunity to meet a lot of new friends, and friends of friends will quickly become your friends after one or two meetings and contacts. In this way, your circle will slowly expand.
Therefore, when someone invites you to an event, you should be happy to do so, even if you don't want to attend. The number of friends, the success or failure of social interaction, sometimes depends on your thoughts.
Finally, you can look for people with similar values to become good friends in your general interactions with everyone, and slowly form your own social circle.
Hope it helps, thank you!
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You just can't interject, you can't act repulsive, listen to them carefully, and always give them your admiring smile, maybe they will be more willing to assimilate you. Well, it's better to start gossiping with their girlfriends.
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If you feel like the topic they talk about, then talk to them all the time, and have the opportunity to express your own opinions, if you don't like it, then just listen to it, there is no need to fight for it to speak, everyone is talking about it, it doesn't become a quarrel.
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I will send you a sentence: ideas influence thoughts, thoughts determine behavior, and behavior leads to consequences. This is what Mr. Ding Yuanzhi said in "Square and Circle 3".
To do something, first of all, you have to be clear about what you really want to get, and you have to solve it fundamentally.
Of course, you shouldn't be too anxious, take your time, and follow your own pace, if you deliberately change your personality, you may fall short.
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Summary. Kiss expresses that this circle is very compatible with your interpersonal relationship, and the people in it are compatible with you!
How to express the circle that can be integrated
Kiss expresses that this circle is very compatible with your interpersonal relationship, and the people in it are compatible with you!
1.Attend more parties or organize events. Don't stay at home all day, go out more often to find friends or colleagues to get together and chat, so that you can better integrate into the circle of friends and your circle of friends will get bigger and bigger.
2.Be more concerned. You should pay more attention to the friends around you, pay attention to whether others have any troubles, or when your friends are not feeling well or encounter small troubles, a greeting and some care are particularly warm and important, so friends will feel that you are a friend worth dating.
3.Learn to be tolerant, people often say, to be tolerant of a person, but also to be tolerant of yourself, hate a person is better to tolerate that person, hate can not solve any problems but will distance each other, so learn to tolerate others, others will not only appreciate but also reflect your generosity.
The above three points are how to better integrate into the circle.
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Some people, some circles, if you really don't go all the way with them, don't force yourself into their circle, because such compromises will only hurt yourself as a result.
Because of the reluctance to integrate, it will only make me feel aggrieved in my heart, and sometimes it feels unnatural when I speak.
In contrast to them, there is no common language on some topics, and their own opinions are excluded. Because it's a girl, if you say that you have some opinions, some thoughts, or some aspects that you do better than them, that kind of jealousy is sometimes enough to ignite a war.
Girls, there are many jealous phenomena, although this sentence is a bit absolute, and it will also hurt a person's self-esteem, but this also has a certain truth. If there is a fight between boys, or if there is any conflict, it is basically proved by strength.
But it's different if you change to a girl, the more you prove your strength, then it will be easy to cause the other party's unhappiness. So, if it's for girls, if it's the same for everyone, then there will be a topic, but on the contrary, there will be no topic.
Although there are many people in a circle with different personalities, it is not completely forced that a person who does not like to socialize must integrate into those circles.
A person who is taciturn and not good at communication does not mean that he has to be a maverick, but because the other party may just want to do things in a down-to-earth manner, and they may be forced by life and may not have much time cost.
People who are not good at socializing sometimes do not know how to respond to the other person's topic. It's easy to be passive, and sometimes you don't know what to say. Because I'm not good at it, sometimes it's easy for people to misunderstand what I say, and sometimes I can't explain it for a long time.
Sometimes, a person's position, as well as ideas, will be determined by the tone of a person's speech, attitude, and the topic of discussion.
For example, if someone hurts someone's inner body by saying something, maybe the other person will take the initiative to realize it and apologize, but some words cannot be said clearly in one or two sentences.
Eating at the same table, it's hard to tell who is worthy of deep friendship, and it looks like everyone is the same, all about the same. However, in fact, I don't know what is going on, some things are always "the authorities are confused".
Make friends, especially be cautious about making bad friends, but it's hard to say whether it's a bad friend or not. According to your own situation, if some social circles do not bring practical value to you, or are insignificant and dispensable in this circle, then you should not join.
At the dinner table, there will always be that kind of after-dinner conversation, some words, the parties may not care, they may not be intentional to say it, but it is difficult to say what others think in their hearts. Sometimes, although others may not have an immediate attack for the sake of the scene, or for the sake of not spoiling the fun, but after that, there is no guarantee.
If those circles are not like-minded, have common topics, have the same interests and hobbies, and can understand each other. Then such a circle, if there is no need, don't fit in.
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Kutuzov said that truthfulness, sincerity and sincerity are the best tips to move people's hearts.
As an animal that likes to live in groups, human nature is to like to build his own group circle with some friends who come to talk. Today's society is increasingly demanding win-win cooperation, so how to create a circle of its own is essential. As the saying goes, "things gather by like, people by groups", what kind of circle a person has, he will find the source and value of the dust he has.
Today's teenagers, especially those in their 20s, don't care if they have their own circle, or they don't know what a circle is.
Coming out of their 20s can be said to be the beginning of leaving school and stepping into the big circle of society, after coming out of the carefree environment of school, you will find that some of them are very confused and do not know how to live? After all, it's a new environment, and everything has to start from scratch. Therefore, it is especially important to create a small circle of your own, in which you will feel a sense of belonging and intimacy.
Let you no longer be confused, but also have a space for relaxation, casualness and interaction in the complex environment of society.
The process of creating a circle is a big challenge for yourself, you need to make new friends and find people you can trust in various situations. Because when you start to step into society, you will begin to play a new role, and start learning the character's personality, lines and actions from scratch. You'll have a new script and life quest that will be difficult but long enough to persevere and play a new role.
After this period of integration, you will have a new world.
Go to eat, drink, prostitute and gamble with the locals.
If you want to expand your circle, that is to say, your circle of friends, then you can only communicate with others through ordinary communication. Make more friends to expand.
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