The child was scheming with me, thinking that what I was doing was a matter of course, and doubting

Take a look at Aihejia Academy, maybe you can send him to **. I heard from a friend that he was much better after being sent there.

Are you using your own efforts as bargaining chips to ask your children to repay you? This would certainly cause him to resent it. Maybe at first he will study hard and listen to you because of guilt, but after a long time he will be disgusted.

Don't let your child feel that all the efforts he makes are to "repay his parents", in fact, his own life is to live for himself. Striving for one's own ideals is the happiest, most efficient, and longest-lasting!

It is necessary to develop children's independence. 16 years old is the time to rebel, don't think about everything for him. It's time for him to have his own way. Especially financially, it is necessary to make him understand that money is not easy to come by. Usually, listen to him more. Be patient.

It's that you spoil him too much, and you have to tell him why you did what you did in the future when you did it or decide, and only by telling him could you understand.

I'm not a few years older than your child, and I can probably understand some of his psychology, which should be that you are too doting, causing him to feel that everything is what you should do, and he can't understand the good intentions of his parents, which leads to his slower growth (psychologically). I think you should talk to your child at the right time, after all, it is not too small to say that he is not small, so that he feels that you pay because you love him, not owe him, only you can do selfless dedication, and others will not be so selfless to him. If it doesn't work, you can make him suffer a little frustration, such as asking him to work for a day, or taking two days to leave him alone, so that he can feel that your efforts are not easy to come by.

Pay attention to the tone of your words when talking, don't be too eager, 16-year-olds are very rebellious, good luck.

Good boys are boastful. But boasting is also very particular. If the child is doing something that he has never tried before, then he must praise it a lot, which is a kind of positive reinforcement.

But when boasting, you should also pay attention to the praise is not the baby itself, but the good behavior he has done. For example: "How seriously the baby reads (listens to stories)!"

This is much better than you complimenting him on how smart he is, and he will be more serious next time he reads a book (and listens to a story). It's the behavior that should be praised, not the baby itself. The same is true for your baby's bad behavior, you can only criticize his bad behavior, but never belittle him personally.

And for the baby has done a good job of things do not need to be praised frequently, you can increase the difficulty and then praise him (that is, reduce the number of praise, so that the child gradually feels that to be praised still needs more effort, and then to better performance development rather than just staying at a level, to get praise is not an easy thing, so that the next time you get praise will be more happy, rather than too much praise leads to numbness, then praise will lose its due effect. Praise is an art that parents need to learn and master, not verbal abuse.

As for the material reward, it is only in the early stage of infancy because the baby's comprehension ability is limited, so the praise is linked to his behavior with specific objects, but when used in a child who already has a certain ability to understand, it is actually a regressive behavior, which will make any behavior lose its original purpose and make the child material. Once a pattern of behavior is formed, then even praise loses its usefulness and eventually evolves into a material transaction. Material praise is not impossible, but it must be used very carefully, otherwise the consequences will be difficult to say.

Personally, I'm more opposed to material rewards. In the words of some experts, spiritual praise is the highest level of psychological needs of children, and material praise lowers the level of praise.

For example, the front of a BMW is plugged into a Mercedes-Benz logo.

It's easy to say when it's open, but it's broken. Are you looking for a BMW 4S shop or a Mercedes-Benz?