Can anyone help me write a little joke that is super funny and connotative

A loaf of bread was walking down the street, and suddenly he felt hungry, so he ate himself.

So he ate himself, and he ate himself.

[Children can't afford to hurt] 1, the bright moonlight in front of the bed --- the fragrance of Li Bai's sleep. 2. The smell --- the three stinkers is the same. 3. If you are poor, you will be alone--- if you are rich, you will have a group of wives and concubines.

4. When the book is used, I hate to be less--- money is not enough to spend at the end of the month. 5. If there is love in the sky, the sky will be old--- if people are in love, they will die early. 6, thinking about the past, Jin Ge Iron Horse --- look at the present day, stalking.

7. Don't bend your waist for five buckets of rice--- just give me six buckets.

A girl gives bai to a boy one day.

du made a dish, and the boy finished eating, but felt that the taste was weird, so he asked the girl back, this.

Answer: What is. Meat? The girl said that it was penguin meat, and the boy pondered for a while ......I cried bitterly and committed suicide, why do you say that?

Reason: The boy had gone on an expedition to the North Pole with his girlfriend, and because there was nothing to eat, the girl cut pieces of her meat to the boy to eat, and lied to him that it was penguin meat, but the boy survived and the girl starved to death. Years later the boy ate for real.

Penguin meat, finally understood the girl's hard work at that time, and under the sadness, she committed suicide.

One day the two tomatoes walked together, walking and walking, and one tomato asked the other: "Why don't you talk for the version?" "The other tomato doesn't care.

Walking and walking, one tomato asked the other, "Why don't you speak?" "The other tomato ignored.

Walking and walking, one tomato asked the other, "Why don't you speak?" Another tomato said

We are tomatoes and can't speak. ”

Once I was on a business trip with my leader, and I met an international student from Africa at the high-speed rail station and asked my leader: How to get to the airport? My leader held back for a long time, looked at me awkwardly, and said:

I don't speak English very well, ah......I was stunned at the time, and asked weakly: Boss, but what people are asking you Chinese ah......

I prefer cold jokes "I think the Phoenix Legend is very pitiful!" Each song can only be sung for 30 seconds! It's all yo! yo！ yo！ yo！！Chek Trouble!! Oh yes (sharp) Oh also

Do you know? Tomorrow, the city will go all out to crack down on the youth who affect the city's appearance, you quickly pack up your things, go out to avoid the limelight, don't say that others say that I told you, remember.

A test of love.

A millionaire has a daughter, and many lads ask her.

Marriage. One day, the millionaire at home edition.

Specially for those who came to him for the feminist son.

The man who proposed a marriage held a banquet and announced: whoever becomes his son-in-law will give half of the property.

After the feast, he led the men who wanted to be his sons-in-law to the pool, where a big fish was kept. Then he opened the door of a nearby cage, and saw a fierce lion rush out, jump into the pool, and swallow the big fish in one gulp. At this point the millionaire turned to them and said:

Whoever can swim to the other side first, I will marry my daughter. ”

I only heard a "plop" sound, the pool splashed, and a young man was already desperately swimming to the opposite side of the pool. As soon as he climbed ashore, the millionaire happily walked over and congratulated him: "My dear, you are the one who really loves my daughter."

But the lad panted and said, "I just want to know which beast pushed me down!" ”

1 A person riding a motorcycle likes to wear clothes backwards, that is, he puts the button zhi on the back to buckle dao

on, you can block the wind. One day he was drunk driving, overturned, and was planted on the side of the road.

After the police arrived.

Constable A: What a serious car accident.

Officer B: yes, I hit my head in the back.

Officer A: Well, there's breathing, let's help him turn his head back.

Officer B: Okay.

One or two made great efforts and turned back.

Officer A: Well, I'm not breathing.........

2 A woman is very ugly, she can't get married, and she hopes to be trafficked. finally made his dream come true, but he couldn't sell it for half a month. The kidnapper sent it back, she resolutely did not get out of the car, and the kidnapper gritted his teeth and stomped his feet: go, the car is gone!!

The boys' and girls' toilets of the 3 schools are connected. A girl forgot to bring toilet paper when she went to the toilet, and when she was embarrassed, toilet paper came from the men's bathroom next door, and the girl lost her face and asked loudly, "Who?" ”。The boy next door replied in a low and powerful voice: "Lei Feng." ”

A woman got off the night shift, a man followed the plot, the woman was afraid, passed by the cemetery, and said to the grave: Dad, I'm back, open the door. The man was terrified, screaming and running.

The woman was at peace and was about to leave, when suddenly a gloomy voice came from the grave: "Girl, you forgot to bring the key again." The woman was frightened and ran away.

At this time, a tomb robber came out of the grave and said: Damn, delay my work, scare you to death! As soon as the words of tomb robbing fell, I found that an old man next to him was carving a tombstone with a chisel, curious, and asked, the old man said angrily, nnd, they carved my name wrong......The great fear of robbing the tomb, waw wow screaming and running.

The old man sneered: "Damn, dare to steal business with me, and be a little more ......tender."As he was talking, the chisel accidentally fell to the ground, and the old man was about to pick it up, when he bent down and found that the chisel was held in one hand in the grass, the old man was startled, and suddenly a voice said: "You are looking for death!"

Mess with my house number! ”。The old man is rolling down the hill!

At this moment, a scavenger crawled out of the grass, "Damn, it takes so much money to make a piece of iron."

A Chinese teacher with a strong dialect read the ancient poem "Wo Chun" to the students, and the Chinese teacher read it aloud as follows; Lying in spring, the dark plum smells the flowers, and the lying branches are sad and hateful. Hearing who lies in the distance, it is easy to penetrate the spring green. The shore is like green, the shore is like green, and the shore is like green.

The teacher asked the students to dictate it, and one student wrote; I have no culture, I have a very low IQ, and if you want to ask me who I am, a big stupid donkey. I'm a donkey, I'm a donkey, I'm a stupid donkey.

My husband and wife slept in a quilt, and my husband sneezed and sprayed my wife's face. My wife said: When there is another situation, say it in advance, and it will be a while. The husband said loudly: Ready!

The wife hurriedly got into the quilt, only to hear the sound of "bang", and her husband let out a fart.

One day, a polar bear wanted to go to the Antarctic bear's house to play, and ended up walking for 5 years to the South Pole. When he arrived at his house, he knocked happily on the door and said, "Let's have fun together!"

Antarctic Bear said, "Okay, go to your house and play!" "It took another 5 years to get to the polar bear's house.