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Try to relax the atmosphere at home, communicate with your children more, and don't just teach! The child's situation is related to his own psychology, physiology, and family. Mainly the last two points, he is now in the rebellious period, which is irreversible and difficult to suppress, it is recommended that parents say more words of encouragement, try to reduce the involvement in the child's private life, and try to talk in the way of friends.
I understand this helplessness, my child was like this last year, his father was about to give up on him, and he had to suspend school for a while, but finally persevered with everyone's efforts.
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Keep smiling, don't do it, getting angry won't solve the problem. Show weakness appropriately, but don't be weak. Treat him as an independent person, equally, with respect.
His right to eat, drink and play is in your hands, are you afraid that you can't control him, you can reward and punish him appropriately, but don't let him feel forced and threatened. Respect his good decisions, remind him of bad decisions, estimate the risks, and teach him how to manage them.
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Don't always criticize, blame, and suppress some of his rebellious behavior, just do it, and the child will only rebel more and more. Sit down face-to-face and calmly talk about your child's recent thoughts, understand his needs and grievances, and let him know that his parents will respect your ideas and that they can understand your rebellious period, but there are some things that should not be done in principle. Those things that are on the bottom line, let him be clear, don't touch them.
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Every child goes through this period of rebellion, and I think the rebellious period is also the only way for them to mature, as long as they don't do anything out of the ordinary, just let it go, just hurt him but don't say much. Although children are rebellious, they will also have the ability to distinguish between right and wrong, so don't worry too much. My brother was also very rebellious when he was in the third year of junior high school, and he quarreled with his family, and suddenly told me that he was going to run away from home, so I said, "Then I can only give you a dress for food as a support for you" You have to make the rebellious child feel that you are on his side, remember to mumble less!
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Use positive words and avoid negative words when guiding your child's behavior. Instead, they all use positive language to talk to their children, rather than saying why are you so timid, it's better to say that the baby is bolder, it's better to say that you don't want to be so clingy, it's better to say that you can be more independent, it's better to say that you're too playful, it's better to say that today's game time is over, it's time for us to take a nap.
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Parents should talk to their children calmly at this stage, don't quarrel with him at every turn, the more you argue, the more rebellious she will be.
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First of all, we must understand the child's feelings, empathy is the basis of being a parent, a parent's ability to be a parent, in the final analysis, is his ability to chase childhood, those parents who can empathize with their children, often can recall their childhood experiences and feelings, and will put themselves in their shoes for empathy, and then take action.
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First of all, we must realize that children have self-esteem, there are always parents who feel that their children are still young and don't understand anything, in fact, on the contrary, children's hearts are pure and sensitive, and even words that they don't understand can figure out the meaning from the intonation.
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It can be treated coldly. That is, not to interfere too much, let the child do things on his own. When he is in a situation where he has no way to solve it on his own and does not know what to do. You give them inspiration or help at this time, and over time, the child will gradually become kind.
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Children generally have to go through a rebellious period in the process of growing up, and some children are particularly obvious, and children in the rebellious period are not easy to manage, so they must learn to listen and encourage their children more.
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Remember, be sure to respect your child and get along with him as an equal! In this way, your expression will be smooth.
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Communicate more with your child, and don't communicate with a purpose when communicating.
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The rebellious period is an important stage in a child's growth, and parents should take a correct view of this stage and adopt the right way to guide it. Here are some ways parents can take:
1.Maintain communication: Communicate with your child, try to understand their thoughts and feelings, and respect their independence.
2.Build trust: During the child's rebellious period, parents should try to stay calm and avoid conflict with their child. Building a relationship of trust is key, so that children feel supported and cared for by their parents.
3.Develop self-esteem: Children's self-esteem is very important, and parents should respect their child's personality and wishes, and give positive feedback and encouragement.
4.Set boundaries: While parents should respect their child's independence, there are also boundaries that need to be set to ensure their child's safety and well-being. For example, set a time for your child to come home, and not to smoke or drink alcohol.
5.Provide support and help: During the child's rebellious period, parents should provide necessary support and help, such as helping the child solve academic problems, providing psychological counseling, etc.
6.Reflect on your own way of education: Parents should also reflect on their own way of educating the cherry blossoms, whether it is too strict or too doting, and whether it needs to be adjusted and improved.
To sum up, parents should take a correct view of their children's rebellious period and face their children with an attitude of tolerance, understanding and support. At the same time, parents should also provide the necessary guidance and help to help their children get through this stage and grow into healthy, confident, and responsible individuals.
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When children enter puberty, certain physical and psychological changes occur, and rebellious emotions and behavioral problems will inevitably occur. As parents, we should not blindly accuse our children of being "disobedient" and "ignorant", but should empathize. Correctly understand adolescent children, regulate their emotions, learn better communication skills, improve interaction patterns, and help children solve problems.
A psychology expert once said: "The real problem is not the child, but the family relationship-poor interaction model." ”
First, parents should establish a solid relationship of trust with their children, actively identify and actively accept their children's emotions, and encourage them to express their inner thoughts.
Second, it is necessary to improve the degree of control and acceptance, be more tolerant of children, do not use dogma to restrain children, and do not want children to assume the posture of parents as soon as they are disobedient.
Third, to be a loving and strict parent, we must have a bottom line on some issues of principle, but we must not be forceful and reasonable, and we must guide them in an appropriate way.
Fourth, creating a good environment for growth, growing and developing in an inclusive and diverse family atmosphere, children will be richer and more secure in their hearts, which will help children establish a correct self-awareness.
However, then again, when it comes to tattoos, parents do have to stick to principles considering the growth and development of their children. However, now that the environment in which children grow up is becoming more and more open, and children's minds are becoming more and more free, parents should also selectively respect their children's wishes.
Huang Lei's eldest daughter, Huang Duoduo, was once on the hot search because of hair dyeing and ear piercing. Many netizens in the comment area said that Huang Duoduo was too precocious, and he had his ears pierced and dyed his hair at a young age, which was easy to become the object of imitation by his peers, which brought bad influence. However, some netizens feel that other people's parents are not against it, what do netizens care?
As long as the school allows it!
Indeed, children at this age are paying more and more attention to their image and have certain aesthetic standards. Xiaoya's mother feels that as long as she does not go beyond the bounds in dressing up and does not violate the rules and regulations of the school, parents should respect their children's choices instead of blindly stopping them.
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1. Allow your child to say "no".
Where there is oppression, there is resistance. When the child says "no", the parent should not refute it at the first time, let the child express himself completely, and allow the existence of different opinions, so that the child will have more trust in the parents.
2. Try to "return a tooth for a tooth".
How to deal with your child's rebellious period? When a child turns a deaf ear to his parents' words or deliberately speaks against them, parents may wish to follow his example. Empathy often allows children to have deeper feelings.
When using this trick, parents must be gentle and not deliberately raise the bar with their children. Let children realize their wrong attitudes so that they can correct them.
3. Learn to affirm and praise.
Don't be stingy with affirmation and praise, when the child is in a rebellious period, parents may be biased towards accusation and criticism, which will make the child more irritable. In the past, I used to yell or discipline my children strictly, but it was basically in vain, and it made the children even more disgusted. However, after studying in the Gaotu Beautiful Family Course for a period of time, I finally know how to get along with my children correctly, and guide my children to have correct values, no longer as antagonistic and disobedient as before, and now I am more like friends with my children!
Every child has something worthy of affirmation and praise, when the child is rebellious, parents may wish to change the angle, replace the blame with an encouraging way to guide the child, praise the child for doing the right thing, parent-child relationship and communication will be much smoother.
4. Treat children as adults.
Parents should learn to treat their children as equals and treat them as adults, which is the most critical issue. Otherwise, it will not be easy for parents to get the approval of their children, and if they don't get recognition, it will not be easy to know what they are thinking in their hearts. If you don't know what your child is thinking, it will be difficult to prescribe the right medicine, and this will not achieve the effect of education.
5. Strictly control the bottom line.
How to deal with your child's rebellious period? For children who are in the rebellious period, parents and children must not be accommodating on issues of principle. As parents, we need to strictly control our bottom line, and parents have a bottom line, which can not only help children establish their own rules, but also make children feel safe.
In addition to the resolute refusal to endanger life and health, Yu encourages children to try, most of the time relaxed, and if it is strict, it will not be strict.
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Don't make a fuss about the phenomenon of rebellion in your child.
Everyone goes through this rebellious period, and of course it is important to keep it calm. Therefore, parents should observe more and be more considerate of their children, and know that educating children can no longer rely on simple and crude forms such as fist violence and abuse, but must be civilized, reformed, cultivated, and master the knowledge of modern educational concepts, so as to be a good parent, so that children can go well, and go through the inevitable course of adolescence in this period of life.
Step into the inner world of your child.
Play more with your children, eat, go on outings, travel, and have more parent-child activities with your children, so that you can get to know your children better and become your children's good friends. Turn the task into a fun game where each other's hearts are relaxed. From the game, it is also good to feel the mood of both parties and get additional emotional communication and understanding, which is more conducive to the child's acceptance of your guidance and guidance.
Family relations are democratic.
During this time, we adults may wish to invite them to join in and hear their thoughts when making decisions about the affairs of the family. First, let them feel that they are a member of the family, and if the correct opinions are adopted and approved by us, it is also a kind of life exercise for them; The second is to let them feel the pressure of adults, and to feel that compared with the opinions of adults, that is, to consider whether they are comprehensive and mature.
If parents blindly criticize and blame simply and rudely, it will definitely lead to the child's rebellion, and the correct way is to analyze the cause of the problem with the child and provide reasonable advice to the child, rather than simply blaming the child for his mistakes.
For children in the rebellious period, parents should grasp the general direction and never compromise on issues of principle, but do not interfere too much in the details of children's private affairs, and give children autonomy.
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Parents should first realize that there is no necessarily relationship between good or bad learning and good or bad nature, and do not measure everything about their children by their academic performance. For example, parents can pay attention to their children's strengths and interests other than learning, use this as an entry point for communication, build a good communication atmosphere, and solve children's emotional confrontation problems, so that children can learn with a more relaxed attitude and let children's grades gradually improve.
Extended Information: There are four stages of rebellious behavior in a child's development.
1. The first stage is the 5 to 6 years old in early childhood, which is the embryonic stage of the child's personality.
2. The second stage is 10 to 12 years old, the period when the child's personality begins to manifest itself and early adolescence.
3. The third stage is 13 to 15 years old, when the rebellious period is the most prominent period, and it is the period when the child's personality type is truly formed.
4. The fourth stage is 17 to 18 years old, when the child's personality is basically stereotyped, and there are obvious differences in self-development and self-improvement. The rebellious period brings with it a number of physical and psychological changes.
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First of all, children should be cared for, but not spoiled, and parents should not indulge their children unlimitedly. Secondly, appropriately delay meeting certain needs of the child, so that the child learns to cherish and respect. Finally, learn to say "no" to your child, and to explicitly refuse unreasonable requests and explain why.
02 Frustrated rebellion.
Adolescent children are fragile and sensitive. Learning difficulties, criticism from parents and teachers, and friction between classmates can all affect children's emotions, make them feel sad, and even feel that their self-esteem has been hurt. If children are not comforted and enlightened in time, they are prone to panic or hostility towards everything around them, and are prone to arguments with their parents.
It is recommended to pay attention to the child's emotions first, and a warm and relaxed family atmosphere can effectively help the child relieve stress. Secondly, let the child talk freely, and when the child is found to be emotionally abnormal, parents should find the right time to talk to the child and guide the child. Finally, never call a child a "bad child", parents should not give a completely negative evaluation to their child, but should see the child's strengths.
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For children in the rebellious period, many parents are anxious and do not know how to educate their children. Children in the rebellious period will say whatever they want, they will always say that they are right, if their parents oppose it, the children will make trouble with their parents, and even beat them, some children are locked in the house, some children run away from home, and adults are anxious. If the child is in the reverse period, parents should wait for the child to finish his thoughts, explain to him the wrong place, he understands, he will listen to you, be patient with the child, communicate with each other, the child's ideas sometimes make sense, give them the right to speak, let them solve it themselves.