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We only have this one life together.
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<><1. People who call for less and talk more are very smart people
2. People who don't tell you the truth are beware of you;
3. The person who talks to you politely deliberately keeps a distance from you;
4. A person who loves tears must be an emotional person;
5. People who love to pat on the back. Generally prefer to bully others.
6. The person who perfunctory you is telling you not to bother him anymore;
7. People who love to swear often have fear in their hearts;
8. Most of the people who like to brag are people with low self-esteem;
9. The person who groomes in front of you mainly wants to please you;
10. The quietest person in the crowd is often the most powerful;
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Do you really know the people around you? Maybe very well, or relatively well, or vaguely. In fact, no matter the degree, there is a problem with the way we understand.
We all like to label others according to our own perceptions, thinking that this is the person we know, but in fact, it is very one-sided. For example, we are all very familiar with Lin Zexu, who sold cigarettes in Humen, and history textbooks label him a national hero. But Lin Zexu still has a side that we are not familiar with.
He is also a balancer who is good at dealing with interpersonal relationships, and is good at dealing with public relations crises, which can be seen from his family letters, he has two sons, one is an official in Beijing, and the other is a daily study at home, so he wrote letters to his two sons separately.
The content of the letter to the first son is roughly meaning: I am an official outside the country alone, and my health is not good, and I hope to see my son and meet him in Guangzhou.
The general content of the letter to the second son is: I am in good health, don't worry. Reading books is for use, not for theoretical research, but to walk around and see more. Encourage him to get in touch with the outside world.
Why is it so different? Because he is good at interpersonal public relations, he understands the warmth and coldness of society at that time.
The eldest son is an official in Beijing, and serving in one region for a long time is easy to make too many enemies, which is not conducive to development. As an official, you should serve in more places and accumulate experience as an official in different regions, so that you can be fully prepared for future development. So he asked his son to go to Guangzhou to see him, and actually arranged an official position for him in Guangzhou.
The second son has been studying at home for a long time and is easy to become a "nerd". So let him walk and watch more, experience more accidents and human feelings, let the book knowledge be used to help him grow.
Next, let's take the famous Humen cigarette sales as an example. Why did Qing ** let him be the governor of Liangguang, and he congratulated him on being the governor of Liangguang and dared to sell cigarettes in Humen? You must know that foreigners are afraid of officials.
Because he knows his principles as an official, in addition to the macro theories of allegiance to the country, he will also be remembered for centuries. He regarded Liufang Baishi as the highest level of being an official, and in line with public opinion, he decided to ban smoking. He knew very well that drugs were banned worldwide, and the destruction of what was originally forbidden was in line with the world trend and could stand the test of the future, so he sold cigarettes.
Lin Zexu is not only a national hero, he also has a far-reaching strategy for planning and shooting, is proficient in interpersonal relations, and his ideas were very advanced at that time.
History textbooks only tell us one side of Lin Zexu, and if we want to understand the shape of the whole, we must make a judgment from multiple details. Therefore, every person is a complex individual, just like a tall tree. What we see is only his branches, but his foundation is in the soil, and only through multiple details, to understand a person in an all-round way, can we draw the final judgment.
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I've always been asked if it's really important to know the people around me.
Recently, after carefully reviewing all the talent assessments I have done in the past year, I have summed up a pattern: all communication problems between parents and children or couples stem from not understanding each other.
Someone will say, "Aren't you talking nonsense?" All communication problems come from not knowing each other, okay? ”
Indeed, the ignorance between people has really become the key to the problem in communication, but it is normal for people who have nothing to do with each other in life not to understand, if there is no special reason, we do not need to understand others, and naturally do not have to face these problems, even if there is a need, there will be certain social etiquette and rules to help us weigh the mode of getting along, and the problem will not be too important.
However, in a small family, husband and wife, between parents and children, brothers and sisters, and even relatives live together for a long time, and there is a need for communication every day, and these exchanges affect people's psychology, emotion, behavior, study, work, friendship, and intimate relationship all the time. and all other day-to-day affairs play a very important and long-term role.
When a highly diverse and perceptive wife meets a highly focused and calm husband.
If you don't understand each other, the former will dislike the latter for being simple, dull and slow to react, and the latter will hate the former for being the same for a while, and it is indefinite.
Dislike is the biggest killer of feelings!
If you understand each other, the former will appreciate the latter's persistence and patience, and the latter will appreciate the former's erudition and quick response.
Is there still a contradiction between each other?
When a parent of auditory spiritual processing wisdom meets a child of visual physical processing wisdom.
If you don't understand each other, the former will dislike the latter's slow response, and he can't understand it for a long time, so he is angry. The latter will resist the former, and will only talk all day long, do nothing, and just talk and not imitate the travel draft.
Resistance is the prelude to rebellion!
If you understand the other person, the former will learn to write down what you want to communicate and demonstrate it again to teach the other party. The latter will worship the former, have a super learning ability, understand it as soon as it is heard, and can quickly transform and teach others.
What else can't be taught?
There are countless examples of this, but they all show us how much difference there is between knowing and not knowing.
Is it really important to know the people around you?
It's really important, only when you get to know each other, you will have the angle and reason to appreciate it; Only by understanding the other person can you know the reason and method of acceptance; Only by getting to know each other will you find the way to inspire and fulfill; Only by getting to know each other will you discover that anything is possible!
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Observe physical features: Each person's physical characteristics are unique, such as facial contours, hairstyle, height, body shape, and many more. Paying attention to these details can help you identify the people around you more easily.
Pay attention to the style of dress: everyone's style of dress is also different. If you're familiar with the style of the people around you, you'll be more recognizable when you see them wearing their usual clothes.
Voice: Each person's voice is also unique to Shina Town, especially the tone and accent of speech. If you're familiar with someone's voice, you can easily recognize them when you hear them.
Behavioral habits: Everyone's behavioral habits are also different. If you are familiar with the behavior of people around you, such as the way they walk, the way they do things, etc., then you can more easily recognize them based on these behaviors.
Interpersonal relationships: Interpersonal relationships between people around you are also a way to identify the people around you. If you know someone's relationship with other people, such as whether they are family members, colleagues, or friends, then you can more easily recognize them based on those relationships.
In short, you can more easily recognize the people around you by observing and understanding their appearance, clothing, voice, behavior, and interpersonal relationships.
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Dear Hello <>
How to identify the people around you? <>
It can be distinguished from the following points: 1. Don't look at what a person says, but look at what a person does. We must learn to observe a person's behavior through the fog of rhetoric.
2. The latitude of a person's thinking represents the height of the person's thinking. If a person's thinking is always hovering at a low level, you must understand that such a person is difficult to change, and communicating with the other party for a long time will only make you doubt yourself. 3. A person who can't empathize with you is a person with poor tolerance and understanding.
Being with such a person will make you feel like you are hitting a wall everywhere, and it will also make you slowly doubt life. 4. People who compliment and praise you too much are hypocrites. Their compliments and compliments on you do not promote your progress, and their flattery has a purpose behind it.
If you don't see this clearly, you will fall into the sweet trap and can't extricate yourself. 5. People who can't see you doing well must stay away. People who can't really bless you will one day hurt you because of jealousy, stay away from such people early, Lingshan Huai is to protect yourself.
6. A person who loves to express himself everywhere is a vain person, and vanity will affect your relationship. 7. People who like to inquire about other people's privacy, try to stay away. 8. People who are really good to you may often point out your shortcomings and shortcomings, but you can feel the sincerity of the other party.
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When two people are familiar, they will let go of their posture, they can talk about more things, and it is convenient for us to ask more things we need to know, so we should spend more time to contact and chat more, so that we can understand each other faster.
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The praise of the villain is the protection of himself, because for the villain, he always likes to expose the shortcomings of others, and exposing the shortcomings of others is equivalent to wanting to elevate himself, so we should not be stingy with his mouth, praising him makes him happy, and he has less chance of harming himself.
Is he really rich or fake? If he is pretending to be rich, you can say some tactful words to expose him, and let him know that you actually know that he is really poor, and that what he said is just blown, and he will not dare to blow it in front of you in the future. If he is really rich, he is too disgusting, you don't want to pay attention to him, then stay away from him, he takes the initiative to approach and want to talk to you, you consciously walk away or find an excuse to leave, so after a few times, he knows that you don't want to talk to him, and he won't be thick enough to stop you again and again, listen to him blow.