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These questions are comprehensive, you can take a look, they are all from the psychological aspect, and there are many such psychological counseling questions on the Internet. Nice**.
Some young parents asked, what should I do if my child has a tantrum? The reason was that he didn't buy him his favorite toys. Listen to what the experts have to say about this question.
If you don't buy a toy, the child will lose his temper In front of the toy counter in the store, we often see such a scene: the child asks the parents to buy a certain toy, and the parents refuse, the child loses his temper, makes noise, and even rolls on the ground. Parents who are afraid of losing face rush to fulfill their children's wishes to make their children stop making noise and tossing.
The child felt that as long as I lost my temper and made a fuss in front of others, my parents would fulfill my wishes. As a result, whenever the child has a new wish, the parents do not agree, the child loses his temper, and finally the parents have to give in. Over time, the child becomes more and more aggressive, his temper grows bigger and bigger, and the person becomes more and more willful and rude.
On the other hand, when it is time to walk, the child's desire to "do everything by himself" begins to sprout. For example, if you want to eat by yourself when you eat, but because you don't know how to use a spoon, you will scatter more than you eat, and you will end up eating with your hands. However, in order to cultivate the child's spontaneity, even this should not stop him.
Analysis of the causes of children's tantrums Children who begin to show spontaneity often want to do something beyond their power, and once they don't do it well, they lose their temper, either screaming, rolling on the ground, or throwing things. This is a very nerve-wracking time for mothers, so when the child wants to do something by himself, the mother is likely to reprimand him without saying, "No."
However, the child's desire to do it on his own is a manifestation of his desire to grow. Therefore, mothers need to understand that this is what their 1-year-old child is like, and let him try to do it when he wants to do it himself. In addition, when the child is noisy and noisy because he cannot live up to his imagination, the adult should deal with it as if nothing happened.
What should I do if my child has a tantrum? Tantrums are a phenomenon that occurs in children around the age of 1, and once they are not satisfied, they cry loudly, stomp their feet, and roll. This kind of "liver fire" is not necessarily aimed at others, and sometimes it is directed at yourself.
Wishing for others to be "like that" and wanting to be "like this" - these desires are too strong and the reality cannot be satisfied, and then the child's childish heart panics and shows emotional instability. When you want to sleep, when you are hungry, or when you feel tired, the slightest thing can cause your child to lose his temper.
When a child has a tantrum, parents should pick him up silently or watch him calmly and wait for the child to calm down. There is no other way. This period of temper tantrums is a necessary stage in the child's development, and moms and dads need to understand this.
Don't think that your child has "gone bad" and blame and reprimand him.
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How can our rural children be so happy to buy toys, we made our own toys when we were young! For example, spinning tops, bamboo dragonflies, and more! Why don't you think about doing these for your kids to play with? Finally, I have to teach him to do it himself and cultivate his hands-on ability!
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The excessive pampering of the family, so that the child is used to getting the toys he wants for granted, will have a bad impact on the child's future character development, if he will cry, tantrum to ask, then the first thing parents should do is to refuse, cold treatment, so that the child learns to accept the "refusal", let him learn to think, what kind of needs are reasonable, what is unreasonable. It's normal for a child to have a tantrum and you don't need to pay too much attention to his behavior.
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As a parent, when a child wants something outside, I do the following:
1.Understand your child's psychology. Children who want toys or other things are usually motivated by curiosity or the influence of their peers, which is normal psychology and requires understanding and patience. It should not be directly denied or scolded, which can cause the child to be depressed or misunderstood.
2.Communicate the reasons with your child. On the basis of understanding, take the initiative to communicate with your child to understand the specific reasons why he wants the object.
If it's just a momentary novelty, it can be guided to consider actual needs; If there is a deeper cause, it should also be communicated patiently. Communication avoids contradictions and allows children to express themselves and make judgments.
3.Consider whether it is necessary and appropriate. If your child wants something that meets a basic need or is conducive to development, you should consider giving it.
If it is entertainment consumption, the decision should be made after comprehensively judging the family's financial situation and other needs of the children. Meeting your child's requirements is also part of developing a good character.
4.Do a good job of explaining. Whether or not the child is given what he or she wants, he or she needs to do a good job of explaining it.
If so, it should be stated that it is based on understanding and supporting his needs; If you are not satisfied, you need to patiently explain the reasons, such as the family's financial situation, the actual value of the things and the degree of need, etc. Explanations allow children to understand their parents' intentions and avoid misunderstandings.
5.Propose alternatives. If it really does not meet the child's requirements, you should propose alternatives in time, give other options or toys, etc.
This can distract your child from being too disappointed or attached. While guiding the child to divert attention, it is also necessary to express understanding and encouragement.
6.Enhance the guidance of disguise rent. In addition to a specific scene, it is also necessary to strengthen the child's daily guidance.
Cultivating a good concept of consumption and understanding of actual needs and the value of goods can affect the reasonableness of their judgment in the long run. Relationships also affect how times of crisis are handled, which requires constant practice and accumulation by parents.
That's what I, as a parent, do about the situation where my child wants something outside. Through comprehensive methods such as communication, understanding, appropriate satisfaction and guidance, children can not only be well explained and disposed of in this scenario, but also gradually cultivate their correct judgment ability and consumption concept through long-term influence. Family education is an ongoing process that requires the patience and dedication of parents.
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A child's rebellion is not formed in a day. With the accumulation of some undesirable factors, the child's rebellious behavior will become more and more aggravated. If parents do not use reasonable methods to guide their children, then the children will become more and more rebellious.
More seriously. What should I do if my child is too rebellious?
Learn to communicate with your child and listen to their ideas
Parents think their children are unreasonable, but they are reasonable in the eyes of their children. This is the lack of communication between parents and children. Therefore, it is not that parents are required to respond to their children's requests, but after the children make requests, parents must understand the children's inner thoughts and then decide whether to buy them for their children, which will reduce the child's rebellious feelings.
Unified concept
Because children's values and views of right and wrong are completely given to children by parents from an early age, it is necessary to develop a unified standard. You can't rely on your parents' mood to judge right or wrong. If it is a mistake of principle, parents should have a unified concept.
Make rules for your child
Parents should set clear rules with their children in advance. This rule is not only for children to follow, but also for parents. It is suitable for the whole family. In this way, the child will not resist the rules, and parents can lead by example and give their children stronger role models and positive strength.
Get to know the child
There is only one way to understand people: don't be impatient when judging people. When a child talks to his parents about a topic that he is very interested in, parents should listen carefully and do not perfunctory or ignore them.
If parents are busy with their own affairs at this time, they can patiently explain the reasons to their children so that they can understand themselves. In this way, the child will feel from the bottom of his heart that this is a manifestation of the parents' respect for the child.
Pay attention to your child's self-development
The rebellious phase is the one that can be completely overcome. As long as parents help their children patiently and carefully, they will not ignore the details of their children's growth and believe that their children can have a healthy and happy growth environment.
Know how to listen
Listen to your child, understand his inner feelings and needs, and understand his or her thoughts. Only understanding can understand and understand, and the relationship between children and parents can be improved.
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Solve the child's emotional problems first, and when the child wants to buy it, we should calm his emotions and don't let him lose his temper, so that we can listen to our words. There is a reason why we told him not to buy toys, such as having them at home, for example, this time, you didn't tell me in advance that you wanted to buy toys, which has disrupted my plans, so I can't buy them for you. If you have to lose your temper, then I will wait for you quietly here, and when you are done with your temper, we have to go back.
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You can't buy toys for him, he will see that you compromised this time to buy him, and next time he will ask you to buy something else, you have to make him understand by giving examples that it is not easy to make money.
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I don't think it's important to be used to him in everything, it will make him take it for granted, be strict when you should be strict, and don't be afraid of him crying.
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Yesterday, I took my child to the supermarket, walked to the toy area, and saw a mother and baby arguing over a toy car. The child wanted it very much, and the mother felt that there were too many toys in the family to buy any more. The child cried and was unwilling, and the mother finally bought it for the child in a huff.
In fact, you will often see such a scene in the supermarket, and most mothers will have two ways to deal with it, one is to say that the family has no money and will not buy it, and the other is to buy it if they think the child likes it. In fact, these two solutions are not good, and they will affect the formation of children's future personalities. A wrong approach 1
Our family is poor, and we take out a wallet that doesn't have a penny to show our children that they have to buy toys in the face of crying children who have to buy toys, many mothers are more extreme, because they really can't get the children, so they can only tell the children that they have no money, and let the children see the empty wallets, and he will die. Many mothers still think that the stool rots their own clever method, but in fact, this has hurt the child's soul in the unaccustomed way. As a parent, the best way to instill a correct view of money in your child is never to tell him how poor our family is, because after a long time, the child will have an inferiority complex and feel that he does not deserve to have good things.
2.Since there is no shortage of money at home, the mother should tell the child where the value of this thing lies, if it is not good for the child's growth at all, or the family has a lot better, it is a waste to buy it home. If every time the child opens his mouth, the mother will buy it, and in the end he will develop a luxurious nature.
2. The right way 1Before going out, the mother should agree with the child what can be bought and what cannot be bought, so that the child will not ask for anything he likes when he sees it in the supermarket. If the child still sees everything, the mother can tell the child that when he goes out, he will take the money according to the shopping list, and if he buys a toy, he can't buy food, and the child will generally think about it clearly.
2.Give the child the right to choose, mothers will definitely give him a birthday gift when the child has a birthday, if the child goes out and sees something he likes very much, and asks for it, the mother can tell the child to wait for his birthday to buy it for him, if you want it now, the birthday gift will be gone. This can not only give the child an expectation, but also take care of the child's mood, which is simply killing two birds with one stone.
Buying insurance for your child can be done for a few hundred dollars a year, but remember these three points! First, don't buy life insurance for your children; Second, don't buy a return type; Third, if you don't have enough budget, buy term critical illness insurance.
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Alas, think about it, adults, who is he angry for, it's not adults who provoke it, plus children are sometimes disobedient, of course he will start beating people, I am from here, I have been beaten by my mother before, so that now there is no common language, even if you are obedient, if he is in a bad mood, he will pick bones in the egg, and the beating is unavoidable.