High scores, the same changed questions, hilarious jokes, and the dialogue should be longer

One day, when Chubby was in math class, the teacher asked Chubby: 1+1=? , Chubby said he didn't know.

The teacher told Chubby to go home and ask. Chubby asked his mother, his mother was cooking, and told Chubby to get out, and Chubby asked his father, Dad, let's watch the ball, and yelled "cool". Chubby asked her sister, her sister was singing, she sang baby, Chubby asked her brother, her brother was playing **, and said:

I'll be waiting for you outside.

The next day, the teacher asked Chubby: 1+1=?. Chubby said:

Get out. The teacher slapped Chubby, and Chubby yelled "cool"! The teacher scolded Chubby for his "rice bucket", and Chubby scolded him for being "despicable (baby)".

The teacher said, "Get out!" Chubby:

I'll be waiting for you outside. The teacher had high blood pressure at that time and fainted...

Xiao Ming and Xiao Hua went to the school to sign up, and the teacher asked Xiao Ming, "What is your name?" Xiao Ming said, "It's called Xiao Ming." The teacher asked, "What do your parents do?" Xiao Ming said, "Wash the toilet." "The teacher was very satisfied.

Xiao Ming told Xiaohua the answer.

The teacher asked Xiaohua, "What is your favorite celebrity?" Xiaohua: "It's called Xiao Ming." Teacher: "He likes it?" Xiaohua: "Wash the toilet." ”

Dumb walked in. The boss asked, "How old is it?" Dumb replied: "It was originally Sun Wukong, but now it has been changed to Zhu Bajie." ”

The boss said, "Are you mentally retarded?" Dumb replied: "Although scientists haven't confirmed it yet, I think it should be."

The first time a gentleman took a plane, he was afraid to open his eyes, but after 15 minutes, he opened his eyes, looked out the window, and shouted: "Oh, it's flying so high, people are like ants.!" ”

The neighbor said: "That's an ant, the plane hasn't taken off yet." ”

If it's funny, just one sentence will do.

A new student came to a certain class.

One day, the teacher asked him, "How old are you?"

Student: May I ask the teacher how old I am?

Teacher: Your age.

Student: Oh, would the teacher want to know my age last year or this year's age?

Teacher: Nonsense, it's definitely this year's pull.

Student: Oh, does the teacher want me to tell you now or is he telling you after class?

Teacher: Now.

Student: Oh, do you want the teacher to say it out loud or quietly?

Teacher: Damn, do you say it or not! Don't fool me!

Student: Say, why does the teacher want to know how old I am?

Teacher: Can't I just ask?

Teacher: Khan died .........

Count the pull, count the pull, students, our topic today is to repeat the antonyms. The teacher says a word, you take a sentence, OK!

Teacher: The weather is very good today.

Student: Tomorrow the weather is bad.

Teacher: I ate fish heads yesterday.

Student: You eat turtle tome today

Teacher: Wrong.

Student: Correct.

Teacher: I said it was wrong.

Student: That's right.

Teacher: You idiot.

Student: I'm a genius.

Teacher: Stand up for me.

Student: I'll sit you down.

Teacher: Did you hear the teacher telling you to stand up?

Student: The teacher told me to sit down, and I heard me!

Teacher: You dare not listen to the teacher.

Student: I don't dare to listen to the teacher.

Teacher: Do you know what you just said?

Student: I know I didn't say anything right now?

Teacher: This classmate, I know you did it on purpose.

Student: Teacher, you know I didn't mean to.

Teacher: You're not big or small.

Student: I'm small and big.

Teacher: You don't study well at such a young age.

Student: I'm so old that I can't learn well.

Teacher: I don't want to talk about you.

Student: You want to talk about me again.

Teacher: Stop.

Student: I'll give you a step.

Teacher: I'm afraid of you, can you stop?

Student: I'm not afraid of you, can I continue?

Teacher: This concludes the antonym exercise.

Student: Synonym practice starts now.

Teacher: You're not done.

Student: I'm endless.

Teacher: You are not educated.

Student: I'm educated.

Teacher: Do you look like a cultured person?

Student: Am I not like an uneducated person?

Teacher: Depressed.

Student: Glad.

Teacher: I'm about to be by you.

Student: You're going to be by me.

Teacher: Can you not speak?

Student: Can I not shut up?

Teacher: Go on, I'm not going to take this lesson, I'll go.

Student: I'll stop, this lesson still has to be done, I'll do it.

Find some jokes, like nephew Momo or something.

Xiao Ming: Xiao Mao's family must be very poor.

Mother: Why do you say that?

Mila.com: Lots of jokes.

Xiao Ming and Xiao Hong at the same table had an awkward quarrel, Xiao Hong scolded "I am a fool at the same table", Xiao Ming was very angry and scolded "You are a fool at the same table".

In this semester, one of my classmates loved to tease girls, and the girls were angry, only to hear her shout "Besides, let's talk about giving you a face on your feet!" "

Once upon a time, there was a brother and sister, the elder brother had clairvoyance, and the younger sister had ears.

The elder brother used his eyes to see new things in the distance and told them to his sister.

The younger sister listened to the chants of the distant church with his ears and sang them to the elder brother.

As time went on, they fell in love, but no matter how they proved the innocence of their love, the father insisted on marrying off his sister, so the elder brother blinded his eyes, and the younger sister made his ears bulge.

No, why, just because there is no true love in this world, what should you be able to do?

Later, a great ** family was very moved when he heard this story, and in order to remember them, he wrote a hand-handed hand-to-hand work:

Two tigers, two tigers, running fast.

One without eyes, the other without ears, it's weird, it's weird.

A Chinese teacher read aloud an ancient poem by Lu You entitled "Lying Spring" to the students and asked the students to dictate it.

The Chinese teacher reads aloud as follows.

One student dictated the following.

Wo Chun" "I'm Stupid".

Dark plum and ghostly flowers, I have no culture.

Lying on the branch and hating the bottom, My IQ is very low, and I am like water in the distance, If you want to ask me who I am, it is easy to see through the spring green. A big stupid donkey.

The shore is green, I am a donkey, the shore is green, I am a donkey, the shore is green. I'm a stupid donkey

Why is Panasonic not as strong as Sony? Answer: Panasonic (I'm afraid of Sonic) Who is taller A or C?

Answer: C is higher (because ABCDA is lower than C) Which flower is the weakest jasmine, sunflower, or rose? Answer:

Jasmine (a [beautiful] jasmine) that is so powerless).

What line do orangutans hate the most? Answer: Parallel lines.

Parallel lines do not intersect (bananas) Which one is the worst, eraser, tiger skin, lion skin? Answer: Eraser.

What are you afraid of cloth and paper? Answer: Cloth is afraid of 10,000, and paper is afraid of what if.

I'm not afraid of 10,000, I'm just afraid of what will happen if the unicorn flies to the North Pole? Answer: Ice cream.

Reason: Which number is the most industrious and which number is the laziest in ice cream (ice unicorn)? Answer:

Lazy; Industrious. How do you calm down a sparrow? Answer:

Press it down. Reason: What is the value of Xiaobai and Xiaobai?

Answer: White Rabbit (two).

Undergraduates, postgraduates, and doctoral students write an essay on how to make braised pork. Undergraduate students write that they can put the meat in the pot and add some condiments to it; The graduate student said that he wrote clearly how much meat to put in, how many condiments, how to cook it, and how long to cook it; A month later, the Ph.D. student published a book called "How to Make Braised Pork" and opened the table of contents, "Chapter 1, How to Raise Pigs".

Scenario 1].

Teacher: Honestly, do you smoke?

Boy A: Don't suck.

Teacher: Don't suck? Well, eat the root fries.

Naturally, Boy A reached out with two fingers and took ......Teacher: Don't suck? Ask your parents to come and ......

Scenario 2 Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy B: Don't suck.

Teacher: Don't suck? Well, eat the root fries.

B Hearing A's situation, he carefully took the fries with the palm of his hand.

Teacher: Don't you dip some ketchup?

b I accidentally dipped too much, so I immediately flicked the ...... with my fingersTeacher: You are very skilled at flicking cigarette ash. Ask your parents to come and ......

Scene 3] Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy C: Don't suck.

Teacher: Don't suck, okay, eat a piece of fries.

c Because of the previous two examples, I ate the fries with a sweat very carefully.

Teacher: Why don't you bring roots back to your classmates?

c After receiving the fries, clip them on your ear ......

Teacher: Don't suck? Ask your parents to come and ......

Scenario 4] Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy D: Don't suck.

Teacher: Very good, let's eat a piece of fries.

d Finished his fries in horror.

Teacher: Why don't you bring roots back to your classmates?

d Carefully placed the fries in his jacket pocket.

The teacher suddenly shouted: The principal is here!

d Hurriedly took the fries out of his pocket and threw them on the ground, stomping on the ...... with his feetTeacher: Don't suck? Ask your parents to come and ......

Scenario 5] Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy E: Don't suck, Teacher: Good, let's eat a piece of fries.

E had just taken the fries, and the teacher said, "Don't you invite me to eat them?"

e hurriedly passed the fries with both hands, then pulled out the lighter ......

Teacher: Don't suck? Ask your parents to come and ......

Scenario 6] Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy f: Don't suck.

Teacher: Very good, let's eat a piece of fries.

f Eat it in horror.

The teacher suddenly shouted: The principal is here!

f His palms were sweaty, but he still bowed his head calmly and said, "Hello Headmaster!"

Teacher: The principal will smell the taste in your mouth.

f Pull out the fries: No, it's still here, the fire hasn't been lit yet, ...... fireScenario 7].

Teacher: Do you smoke or not?

Boy G: Promise God, absolutely not suck.

Teacher: Really don't suck? Okay, let's have a root fries.

g It is very natural to take the fries and eat them clean.

Teacher: What a good boy, what brand of fries do you usually like?

g ( get carried away) : Greater China ......

Scenario 8] Teacher: Let's eat a piece of fries.

Boy N: Thanks, no.

Teacher: ....

……The girl's firm expression made Wen De know that it was useless to persuade her, but Xing Yuxuan couldn't help but glance at her after hearing it.

F: Do you love me? M: Love. F: How do you love? M: Yes.

recordcookie = $.0,

It's funny, beg for adoption!!

Nickname is a 1st grade student, and one day, the teacher asks nickname, what is one plus one? Kina said he didn't know, and the teacher told him to go home and ask his parents.

When the little name got home, he asked his mother, who was cooking, and yelled "Get out!" Xiao Ming went to ask his dad again, and his dad was watching the ball game and shouted "Cool!" Xiao Ming went to ask his sister again, his sister was singing a pop song, singing to beby, Xiao Ming went to ask his brother again, his brother was asking his girlfriend in front of the door, and he picked up his mobile phone and said, "Honey, I'm waiting for you outside."

The next day, the teacher asked Xiao Ming what is the value of one plus one? Xiao Ming said, "Get out!" The teacher got angry and slapped Xiao Ming, and Xiao Ming shouted Cool!

The teacher scolded Xiao Ming for being a stupid, and Xiao Ming scolded back, Despicable (beby) The teacher said, give me a penalty station outside! Brother Xiao Mingxue said sensationally Honey, I'm waiting for you outside!

This paragraph was typed by my own hands and is not a copy.

o(∩_o o(∩_o o(∩_o o(∩_o o(∩_o o(∩_o o(∩_o

Adopt Adopt Adopt Adopt

One day, my friend and I were guessing a riddle...

Q: How old am I?

a：。。Speechless.

1. Teacher: "In the future, your test scores will be ranked according to the height of your occupation from the ground." Those who do well in the test are astronauts, pilots, and so on.

Tomb robbery level. 2. In class, the teacher said, "Don't look at the teacher who always criticizes you, in fact, it is for your good."

If you become a teacher in the future, and your knowledge is updated at that time, maybe you will have to teach me. How do you feel about this? A voice came from the back of the classroom

It is not too late for a gentleman to take revenge. 3. Man: "Your Excellency, I can't live with my wife anymore, she is so rough that she started throwing plates at me three years ago!"

Judge: "Then why are you filing for divorce now?" "Man:

Because she's still getting more and more accurate lately! 4, the butterfly mother said to her daughter: "It's better to marry a mosquito, it's okay to be small, it's okay if you're black, it's a leader!"

The butterfly daughter asked puzzledly, "What kind of leader is it?" Mother Butterfly said solemnly

Of course, it is a leader, as soon as it speaks, people will applaud, not what a leader is! 5. The father earnestly taught his son, who was about to go away: "Son, remember, to suffer a loss is to take advantage.

The son nodded knowingly. Then the father added: "Son, don't take advantage of others.

6.In Chinese class, the teacher asks students to say an idiom to describe a person who is happy and happy, and there must be numbers in the idiom. A student confidently raised his hand and replied, "Smile at Jiuquan!" ”

7.In Chinese class, the teacher asks students to say an idiom to describe a person who is happy and happy, and there must be numbers in the idiom. A student confidently raised his hand and replied, "Smile at Jiuquan!" ”