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Rationale: The theory of attachment styles is based on the fact that people follow a biological program to find love.
Ever wondered why you become clingy as soon as you have a partner? Or why can't you stay in a relationship for long? New research has found that the way we behave in intimate relationships is predetermined by our "attachment style".
By identifying yourself as an "avoidant," "anxious," or "secure," you can find the perfect spouse and improve your intimacy.
For avoidant people, it is important for them to maintain their independence, so they often choose freedom over emotional intimacy. When they want to be close to someone, they will feel uncomfortable because they are too intimate, so they try to keep their partner arm's length away.
They don't spend a lot of time worrying about whether they will be rejected by the other person and they don't open up to their partner, so they often complain about the other person's alienation and indifference. In intimate relationships, they are often highly vigilant for signs that their partner is controlling or violating themselves.
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Don't be overly attached to each other, and grasp the distance between the two parties, and don't waste all your time on each other.
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I think the most important thing to pay attention to is not to hide your love in your heart, and you must think that they express your love for them very clearly.
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I think if you want to avoid this situation, you should try to let him make his own decisions, otherwise everything will depend on you, let you decide and learn to let him be independent.
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Avoidant attachment may have some advantages in a relationship, such as:
High level of independence: People with avoidant attachment are usually more independent and can handle life's problems and challenges on their own without much support and attention. This independent attitude can make them less dependent on each other in a relationship, thus reducing the risk of being hurt.
Less need for emotional communication: People who avoid sexual attachment may be less likely to need deep emotional communication with their partner because they are often less willing to expose their emotions and feelings. This trait may make it easier for them to remain calm and sane, thus avoiding emotional conflicts.
Less emotionally dependent: Because people with avoidant attachment are less likely to need an intimate relationship with their partner, they usually don't develop much emotional dependence on their partner. This trait may make it easier for them to get out of an unhealthy relationship or recover more quickly after a relationship breakdown.
However, avoidant attachment also has a lot of drawbacks, such as:
Difficulty forming intimate relationships: People who avoid sexual attachment often have difficulty forming intimate relationships with others, which can limit their social life and romantic opportunities.
Lack of trust: People with avoidant attachment may have difficulty trusting others due to past hurts or avoidance of feelings, which can cause them to miss out on good opportunities in a relationship or to build a relationship with someone who is right for them.
May lack of emotional expression: People with avoidant attachment may be less adept at expressing their emotions and feelings, which may cause them to appear aloof or detached in a relationship. This can cause confusion or dissatisfaction for the partner, which can affect the development of the relationship.
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Avoidant attachment is an attachment style that manifests itself in a greater tendency to avoid intimate contact and emotional expression in intimate relationships. Although avoidant attachment can present some challenges, it can also have some advantages in some cases:
Independence and autonomy: People with avoidant attachment are often more independent and autonomous, tending to rely on themselves rather than others. This makes them more likely to stay ego, pursue personal goals, and make decisions independently.
Self-protection and independent thinking: People with avoidant attachment tend to be good at independent thinking and self-preservation. They tend to deal with problems more calmly and rationally, are not easily influenced by the emotions of others, and are better able to cope with stress and difficulties.
Not overly dependent on others: People with avoidant attachment are relatively less dependent on others for their own needs and well-being. They are more inclined to rely on themselves and are less dependent on others, which may help to reduce expectations and disappointments in others.
However, it is important to note that excessive avoidant attachment may lead to emotional alienation, difficulty in establishing intimacy, and difficulty communicating with your partner. In building a healthy romantic relationship, it is important to balance personal independence and intimacy with others. Seeking psychological support, enhancing emotional communication skills, and developing emotional security can all help people who are avoidant to be sexually attached better at managing romantic relationships.
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Avoidant attachment is a pattern of interpersonal relationships that typically manifests as avoidance and distancing from intimacy. In a relationship, avoidant attachment may bring some advantages, such as:
1.Strong independence: People with avoidant attachment are usually more independent and less dependent on others, so in a relationship, they may be more autonomous and self-reliant.
2.No strong emotional dependence: People with avoidant attachment are usually less likely to show strong emotional dependence, so in a relationship, they may be more calm and rational and will not make impulsive decisions because of their emotions.
3.Adaptable: People who are avoidant of sexual attachment are often able to adjust to being single, so in a relationship, they may be more likely to adapt to the changes and challenges in a relationship.
4.Emphasis on self-growth: People who are avoidant attachment tend to focus more on self-growth and development, so in a relationship, they may focus more on their own development and growth, and will not neglect their personal development because of love.
In conclusion, avoidant attachment may bring some advantages in a relationship, such as strong independence, absence of strong emotional dependence, strong adaptability, emphasis on self-growth, etc. However, it is important to note that avoidant attachment can also lead to unstable and unhealthy relationships, so proper communication and understanding need to be maintained in a relationship.
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Avoidant attachment is a type of attachment that refers to avoidance and distancing from intimate relationships, which may stem from parental alienation or absence during childhood.
In relationships, avoidant attachment people tend to be independent, self-protective, and self-controlled, and therefore relatively less likely to be overly dependent, addicted, and controlling over each other like other attachment styles. This may make the avoidant attachment person more mature and rational in some ways, such as being more calm in problem-solving, decision-making, and responding to challenges, and not being affected by emotional fluctuations.
In addition, avoidant attachment people tend to focus more on personal space and privacy, and do not be too intrusive and intrusive with their partner, which can help build a healthy romantic relationship and an atmosphere of mutual respect.
However, it is also important to note that avoidant attachment people may also exhibit some negative effects in relationships, such as excessive independence and self-protection may lead to a lack of emotional interaction and communication, which can affect the stability and quality of the relationship.
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Avoidant personality is a common type of personality disorder in which people generally avoid intimacy with others and often exhibit patterns of emotion-avoidant behavior. If you've ever been in a relationship with someone with an avoidant personality, you'll find that the relationship can be even more challenging. In the process of being in love, you are likely to feel difficulties in establishing an intimate relationship with the other person, and even experience insecurity and psychological tension.
First, we need to understand the personality traits of the avoidant personality. They often tend to feel insecure and afraid of being hurt and therefore tend to avoid others emotionally. Some people with avoidant personalities may display ambivalent behavior, i.e., a desire to connect with others, but an unwillingness to truly focus on the emotional risks they fear.
For falling in love with someone with an avoidant personality, the first thing we need to do is not to take the other person's avoidance as a rejection, because avoidance does not mean that there is no affection for you. On the contrary, they may love you deeply in their hearts and just don't know how to express it. Therefore, when dealing with an intimate relationship with someone with an avoidant personality, we should express our emotions as much as possible, so that the other person gradually understands our trust and support, so as to gradually build a comprehensive foundation of mutual trust.
Second, we need to understand the emotional needs of the avoidant personality, as this is the foundation for building a stable relationship. Dating someone with an avoidant personality requires respecting the other person's needs and feelings, and letting the other person know that we accept and respect. We need to understand the emotional needs of the other person, support them psychologically, and try to communicate with them.
Slowly, he established a relationship of security and trust with the other party, so that he could succeed in love.
Finally, through my personal experience, I have found that what we need is mutual respect, mutual understanding, which is necessary for us to be successful in a relationship. In my time with people with avoidant personalities, I realized that I needed to take more understanding and support to make them feel my trust and love in order to build a strong foundation of trust.
Therefore, what is needed to fall in love with someone with an avoidant personality is patience, understanding, support, and building full mutual trust. This can be achieved by communicating with the other person, respecting their needs and feelings, and providing psychological counseling. Ultimately, we need to focus on mutual understanding and support to achieve our emotional goals together.
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When you fall in love with an avoidant person, first tell the other person the result, and then give the other person a loose and disposable choice. This sounds a bit mysterious, for example.
You're going on a date with your partner, and your intention is to take her out for a walk. The other half has an avoidant personality, and subconsciously wants to escape out of fear of seeing people and social fear.
At this time, the other party is still struggling, and if you don't reply to your messages in time, you keep asking, and the result will be counterproductive. The other party will feel that you have put too much pressure on him, and instinctively begin to avoid your relationship, and want to gain his trust again, and have to toss again.
The right way should be this. You tell him the result directly: "I want to go out with you, go out with you." However, it's up to you whether you go or not, and even you can decide at any time whether to go or not, to regret it or not, and I am happy to be with you. ”
This is to tell the result directly, and then give the other party enough choice, go or not, it's okay, even if you decide to go, and then you want to regret not going, it's okay, even if you don't want to go, and then you decide to go, it's okay, don't have any pressure. It's all up to you.
Avoidant personality is mostly caused by some kind of psychological trauma when childhood, which requires enough patience and love to ** each other. Patience is the ability to persist in companionship, because without patience there will be pressure. Love is the trauma in his heart, and love is the best medicine for all psychological wounds.
Therefore, when it comes to falling in love with an avoidant person, patience and love are the most important.
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Falling in love with someone with avoidant attachment must be different from dating someone with secure attachment, and the experience of falling in love and the applicable dating skills will also be different. The first thing you need to do is to forget the love experience and relationship patterns you have seen and learned from others before, face the person in front of you seriously, recognize the uniqueness of the person, and listen to the person with your heart, don't apply the universally applicable love rules to you, let alone put others on you.
Try to understand his thoughts and not force them to change. The reason why people with avoidant attachment form such a personality is often related to their family of origin.
Maybe he lived in an unhappy family since he was a child, his parents did not respond to his expectations much, nor did they pay attention to him, he rarely received the love of his parents, he did not trust love, held a skeptical attitude, and gradually formed an avoidant attachment. The logic of such people's thoughts and behaviors is likely to be deeply ingrained, and even if some of them are unreasonable, it is difficult for them to change them all at once. So when you associate with such a person, you should try to understand his world, understand his thoughts and figure out why he thinks the way he thinks, and guide him in a way that he can accept, rather than letting him change for you.
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