I m helpless, I m living purely for my parents

Now your main contradiction seems to be the contradiction between your mind and your parents' mind.

Try your communication methods first, try to communicate your thoughts with them very calmly, and I think they are not so open-minded that they don't even listen to your ideas. If it really doesn't work, you can consult the school's psychology teacher, don't be afraid of embarrassment, really, if you really want to change the status quo, only a psychologist or a psychologist can give you more professionalism.

Don't think about your parents' vindictiveness, even if you do feel it. Tolerance is the greatest virtue.

The world is so big, if you are right, then you are really sorry that such a thing has also happened to you.

If your parents are still healthy and still thwart your opinions, then it is recommended that you learn to rebel and regret your future. Or they are old, you have to think about what he meant by him, because to such an extent, they can only rely on you, just understand each other.

ok.You're right.

At least I believe this is the case.

Parents want you to be as you are in their image.

Just don't do it. You're not right. You rebel. You have to get educated.

This kind of psychology is as stubborn and old-fashioned as a fossil.

Such parents. Even if you don't say it, I believe that such people exist.

At least I don't recognize the approach of such people. I don't disagree with your idea.

But they do it because they want you to have a better life in the future.

Or is there something wrong between them, so it's vented on you.

Or maybe it's because you've done something wrong in the past that caused them to do this to you.

Can you tell us about your situation?Or maybe you want us to help you with something

The question is not clear. I don't understand.

Yes, everyone has their own life, and they don't want to have their parents decide everything, so what's the point of living by themselves, life is colorless.

The girl's parents couldn't believe it, how could such a kind, well-behaved, obedient, positive and sunny girl commit suicide!

The girl is sunny and cheerful on the surface, but there are secrets hidden in her heart. She doesn't like to study, and she is the last one to leave the classroom every day, in fact, her homework has already been written; She hates socializing, and pretends to talk and laugh with her classmates in **, but in fact, there is no one on the other side of **. She doesn't know what happiness is, she doesn't know what she wants, she just wants to be an excellent daughter in the eyes of her parents.

She does not live for herself, but a puppet of her parents' will, and in the end does not bear the burden.

"Dad said that after graduating from the girl, she should go home to take the civil service exam, so I had a big fight with him and chose to stay in Beijing and struggle. I do, right? ”

I want to study psychology, but my family says it's hard to find a job, should I stick to it? ”

Growing up, it seems that every time I choose, I listen to my parents' ......I don't want them to be sad. ”

Many people actually have their own thoughts in their hearts, but they often can't distinguish what they want from what their parents want, and often suppress themselves and don't want their parents to worry.

In fact, any adult who fails to achieve inner independence is, to some extent, a kind of "suicide", erasing the possibility of living oneself and having a wonderful life.

So, today, Uncle will talk to you about "inner independence"!

What is true inner independence?

Mahler et al., an expert in object relations theory, believe that from childhood dependence on parents to the completion of psychological independence, it is necessary to go through a process of separation and individuation: [4-6].

Stage 1 (5 - 24 months): Internalize the image of your parents, how your parents treat "me" and "me" as you would treat yourself.

Stage 2 (adolescence): Separation from internalizing parents, detachment from emotional dependence on parents.

Stage 3 (late adolescence): reconciliation with parents and harmony between parents and parent-child relationship.

What we mean by psychological independence is that in the second stage, we have not departed from our emotional dependence on our parents, established good psychological boundaries with our parents, and realized that "I" is "me" and "parents" are "parents".

Does independence mean staying away from one's parents and not listening to them at all?

1.Independence equals rebellion? <>

Some people think that rebellion is independence. My parents told me to go east, and I went west; My parents told me to go west, and I went east.

Uncle heard the story of a school bully who rebelled against his parents.

This boy is in his third year of high school, and his studies are very good, and the teachers and parents all think that this child will definitely be admitted to Tsinghua University.

And this boy "won't go to Tsinghua University even if he is killed!" The reason is that his parents want him to go to Tsinghua University, but in order not to let them succeed, he will never go to Tsinghua University!

To live is to live, how can there be so much for whom, if you say for whom it must be for yourself, don't kidnap others morally, say whatever I say I live for whoever I want, otherwise I would have left the world a long time ago, people are selfish, live to make yourself happy, it doesn't matter who you are for.

We live for ourselves, and everyone should live for themselves, and not be bound by anyone.

Of course, we live for ourselves, but because our parents have taken care of us since childhood, we should support our parents, so we must also live for our parents.

To live for yourself. Our parents are going to leave us after all, and of course we live for ourselves.

Communicate patiently with them, and fight if you can't communicate. In fact, your parents nag you just to make you work hard. The fact that they can say this about you actually shows that your career is not as successful as your family thinks.

But it's nothing, 1.2 billion Chinese, of which more than 1.1 billion are ordinary, and we are just one of them.

I think on the one hand, you should enlighten them and tell them that they have grown up, worked, and have the ability to take care of and manage themselves, and on the other hand, you should prove with practical actions that you are trying to make your life better.

Of course, simple words and actions alone cannot change the stubborn thoughts of the elderly, so when necessary, a resolute attitude and behavior are still necessary, such as "running away from home", going to a friend's house for the night, occasionally going to an Internet café to open a night market, and not going home to eat when they quarrel, so that they are properly worried (remember, appropriate). Slowly, their attitude will improve for you, and at this time, you can accept it when you see it.

Remember, in the face of parents, first of all, think about changing yourself, and if it doesn't work, at the same time, consider changing them appropriately. I wish you and your family happiness and good health.

If it's me: I can't stand it.

My parents were also annoyed and simply couldn't tolerate it.

However, I chose to endure and chose to find a way. Because, they are always our loved ones. I didn't have to say a few words to them before they got into an argument.

I'm tired. But I still have to be kind to them, and I have to give myself an explanation. You only have one life, I told myself.

I can't stand it, so not all parents think about their children, maybe your parents and the two of them don't have a good relationship themselves.

But compared to outsiders, it's better to be your own parents, and this is really like this, and if there's something going on, they'll still help you.

Try not to conflict with them, it's useless to talk about it, if you feel uncomfortable, come to the Internet and talk about it, do your job, and one day they will be proud of you.

Well, there are those who follow their own wishes and smooth sailing. If.

If it doesn't go well, it's good to jump out and see the big world outside. You can't blame your parents for having a bad family, because they themselves are poor and don't have a good education, so they don't expand their minds so much. People, life is not long, just have your own conscience, there is no need to be too kind, but all kindness must be based on your own material situation.

I don't have a good time, and I still think about others, which is practicing myself. Emotionally, I can't go on and leave, but if I have a child, I have to think about it. A few times in a lifetime, life is wonderful.

I also feel that life is very tiring, the burden is very heavy, and every day is muddy.

There are not many friends and no love.

But every time I want to die, I feel that there are thousands of people like me in the world, and it would be great if I could help them, and wanting to help others has become the reason for my life.

I hope you think carefully about what supports you to live, whether it is the expectation of happiness, it may be worrying about the future of your parents, or it may be that you want others to look up to you.

No matter what the goal is, I want you to keep it in mind and work hard to achieve it.

Additional: If your life is better, then I myself will feel very happy, and I will feel that I am helping others, so I hope you can think of me when you are helpless, think of other people who help you, we are all looking forward to you getting your own happiness.

Isn't it all because of the man's gift money to your parents? Your parents are selling their daughter. As a result, all the debts after marriage can only be repaid by the young husband and wife together.

Time will dilute everything

Life is beautiful, we are experiencing life no matter the ups and downs, don't lose hope in life, let alone lose hope in life.

Don't live in someone else's world, come out, put all these bad things aside, even if you are alone, you don't have to care about anyone's opinions and requirements, even if it is your parents, you are an independent individual, not someone else's puppet, I hope you can understand this.

Follow your heart, pursue what you yearn for, be optimistic about life, your horizons will become broader, and you will find that the world is beautiful.

Being alive is the greatest treasure in life.

As long as you're alive, anything can happen.

Hehe, I don't read, I can't write, but I can surf the Internet. How did you learn it?

Let's get out of your place without starting! There's no need to bring it,!!