Why am I not cowardly but not respected?

Whether it is in life or in relationships, the more you give, the less you get respected, why is this? Because this is human nature, today we will analyze this issue from the perspective of psychology.

1.Sense of value estimation.

A person's sense of worth is reflected in two aspects, one is the value we can create for others, and the other is the value that we identify with. If we blindly pay for others without asking for anything in return, others will think that our efforts are simple and taken for granted, and others will continue to devalue us, which will affect our own value judgments, and over time, we will agree with other people's thoughts in our hearts and think that we are worthless. Just like when a product in a store is discounted, people think that its true value is only so much, and when the merchant returns to the original price, consumers are not willing to buy it.

2.Low sense of self-identity.

Most people with a low sense of self-identity have been suppressed and denied since childhood, and they have never had a correct understanding of self-worth. Such people have been accustomed to paying for others since childhood, and are eager to prove to others that they are valuable with bottomless pay, this kind of pay is even more self-deprecating in the eyes of others, and will not treat you as the same thing, the more you pay, the more worthless in the eyes of others, and then the sense of self-worth becomes lower, forming a dead circle.

3.Over-reliance.

Excessive giving is easy to form over-dependence, and dependence will pull into the relationship with each other, dissolve the sense of boundary between two people, and do disrespectful things without a sense of boundary. It's easy to be grateful to strangers and ask for something close to us. A little boy who ran away from home after a quarrel with his mother was cold and hungry, the owner of the noodle restaurant saw that he was pitiful, invited him into the house and cooked him a bowl of steaming noodles, the little boy was very grateful to the boss after eating, and claimed that he would repay the boss's kindness in the future, but the boss asked:

Your mom cooked you more than one meal, did you thank her properly? The boy blushed in shame. In life, we also leave patience and good temper to outsiders, impatience and impatience are given to those closest to us.

A cowardly person will definitely not be respected.

But to be respected, it's not enough to be "not cowardly."

If a person wants to be respected, he must first have the strength to be superior to others.

Respect, the premise is to respect the strong.

Only the strong are entitled to respect.

If you are not strong enough, you are not eligible for respect.

And "not cowardly" is only the minimum requirement for a person to maintain a basic state of independence. ......Such a state is not enough to gain respect.

Specifically, in order for a person to be respected, he or she must possess the following abilities:

1. Superb professional skills.

This is the basis for a person to base himself in the workplace, make achievements, and then win identity and status for himself.

Only with a high level of professional skills can you make achievements in the workplace and obtain the corresponding status and status. Only by oneself can you be qualified to be respected.

Therefore, in order to be respected, you must have a superior level of technical skills.

2. Interpersonal skills.

The person who can be respected in the crowd must be someone with strong interpersonal skills.

This type of person knows how to get along with people and has the ability to live in harmony with a wide variety of people.

If you can't even communicate with others, you won't be able to gain the respect of others.

3. Self-reliance and self-reliance.

Those who are confident stand and those who are self-reliant are strong.

Only a self-reliant and self-reliant person can have a decent identity and a status of his own. ......Such a person can gain enough respect.

From the above analysis, it can be seen that people who can gain respect must be excellent people. It's hard for mediocre people to gain respect.

Therefore, it is not enough for a person to be respected simply by having the basic condition of "not being cowardly". He still needs to improve his quality to have any chance of gaining respect.

It's not only cowardly people who don't get respect, sometimes they are too strong, and when they don't take advantage of them, they still don't get respect, even if others respect, it's only superficial respect, we all say that if you want to get the respect of others, you must first respect others, and then make yourself strong, and at the same time, you must also convince people with virtue, so that you can win people's hearts.

There is a reason why you are not cowardly, but you are not respected, and it should be reflected in the following points!

1. I don't know how to get angry.

You don't lose your temper when you should lose your temper, you get angry when you shouldn't, you get angry when you don't do anything, you get angry when it's not pleasing to your eyes, or you get angry every day, so that you become less terrible, and there is nothing to be valued.

To be a man, you must know how to get angry, when you shouldn't be angry, when the sky falls, you won't get angry, when you should be angry, you will be angry, just like the angry King Kong, you should criticize when you should be criticized, and you should be praised when you should be praised, so that others can be afraid of you and respect you.

2. There is no principle.

Others say good is good, others say bad is bad.

At first, everyone thought you were a good talker, but after a long time, no one will cherish you.

We must have our own principles in life and everything, and principles can improve our own value.

3. Patience.

For the person you suddenly get angry with, you don't know how many times she has endured you in her heart, you don't know how many times she has been wronged behind your back, and you don't know the price and effort she has paid behind your back.

Once she gets angry, you won't tolerate it, you won't tolerate it, you won't be patient, you will fight with her, just like fighting on the battlefield, after a long time, she is not willing to pay for you, and she will lose confidence in you, so she will naturally stay away from you.

4. It will not return to zero.

Life needs to be zeroed, and every time you have a while, you have to clear the past and start again.

Let go when it's time to let go, forget what you should forget, throw away the burden of the past, and refresh yourself from time to time, so that your network expands and you will be able to reap a satisfying life.

1. First of all, please know how to respect and love yourself, only if you respect and love yourself, others will value you. A person can only love others if he first loves himself.

2. Please don't promise others things easily, and don't promise things that can't be done, because if you can't do it, you will lose your trust in others.

3. Learn to be less suspicious. Trust between friends is the most important, distrust will slowly alienate you from your friends, there are things that are better to make clear.

4. Learn to keep the secrets that others tell you. Because others can tell you what is in their hearts, it is the trust of others in you, and if you ignore this trust, you are distrusting others.

5. Please be humble, don't pretend to understand, whether at work or in life, please seek truth from facts, don't pretend to understand. If you don't know how to be humble, ask others for advice.

6. Please learn to be strict with yourself, be strict with yourself, but be generous to others, and be able to tolerate the unintentional mistakes of friends, so that the friendship will last longer. Thank you.

If you want to be respected, first of all, what you do must be **, be praised by others, your character must be upright, so that others will respect you and treat you as an admirable person, so the most important thing is to start from your own behavior, not only cowardly people are not respected, sometimes they are too strong, and when they are not reasonable, they still can't be respected, even if others respect, it is only superficial respect, we all say that if you want to get the respect of others, you must first respect others, Then make yourself strong, and at the same time, you must convince people with virtue, so that you can win people's hearts.

If you want to be respected by others, you must first respect others yourself. Don't cultivate yourself in the hearts of others, and don't force others in your own hearts. Respect for other people's lifestyles, take into account their feelings and dislikes, be tolerant, and be enthusiastic about helping others to earn respect.

Earning respect is not about being strong, powerful, or capable. It is not that cowardice is not respected, but that one's knowledge and character, unique temperament and personality charm are appreciated by others.

Respect is not a matter of face, it can't be regained, and it is not given by others, but it is obtained by relying on one's own strength, wisdom and wisdom to conquer others.

If you want to gain the respect of others, you must start from yourself, respect others, and then ask others to respect them.

If you violate this law, you are likely to fall into a passive situation.

is not cowardly but not respected, it is his own strength or coldness that distances him from everyone. If you don't help others enthusiastically, you won't get help from others, you won't respect others, and you won't get the respect of others. What kind of flowers bloom?

What is the result? Life has always been like this.

It's not that you will be respected if you are not cowardly, the premise of being respected is to learn to respect others, and your emotional intelligence should be higher, don't be too nosy, and don't participate in rights and wrongs that have nothing to do with you.

It is said that people are good at being bullied, and horses are good at being ridden. People are too weak, and they don't get the reward and respect they deserve for their efforts. On the contrary, if you are tougher, he will please you and be your friend.

But I am not weak at all, and I will fight back even if I am physically or verbally violated. belongs to the kind of "you respect me a foot, I respect you a foot; You have to inch in, I cut the grass and eradicate the roots" type! The end result was that I wasn't bullied, but I didn't have any friends.

Whether it is elementary school, junior high school, high school or university, although I am at the top of my academic performance (I have not been in the top five of my class), I have a good character, I am polite, honest and trustworthy, I do not litter, I do not spit, etc. But no one wants to get along with me, and even if there are one or two, they are all the same type as me. Every time the class cadres and party members vote for the election, I have very few votes.

I'll admit that I'm an introvert and a mean talker, but I have absolutely no bad intentions, and I've never done anything to be sorry for them.

It is said that kindness must be a little sharp, I thought that I was strong, and others came to hug my thighs, but why am I strong, but others come to isolate me. Is it that my "edge" is too sharp, and others dare not approach. Is it my problem or theirs.

Because respect is mutual, it has nothing to do with character. If you respect others, they will respect you. If you don't respect others, how can others respect you.

Therefore, you can start with your own reasons and see if you are not good enough in any aspect. Or maybe it's too strong and hurts others.

Whether or not you can get the respect of others has nothing to do with your own cowardice, and you don't need to care about this at all, just do your own thing and let others say it.

This question is complex and simple, it is a problem of interpersonal relationships, not everyone you respect him, he will respect you the same, to be respected in addition to others to have basic cultivation, but also to have your own place to be respected, otherwise, the more you respect others, in the eyes of others you are not only not cultivated, but the more lowly, so, neither humble nor arrogant is a compliment.

The relationship between people is determined by interests and games, and there will be no conflict between two unrelated people, you can only say that you have violated the interests of the other party.

The benefits here include, money, power, self-esteem.