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Is it ugly for my mother-in-law not to go home for the New Year? I don't have a good relationship with my parents-in-law and don't want to go home for the New Year, this time is a very headache experience, I want to say that my husband should also go home for the New Year, after all, the New Year is a day of family reunion.
Many daughters-in-law and parents-in-law have a bad relationship, they don't want to go home for the New Year, they don't want to face their parents-in-law, they are afraid of quarreling with their parents-in-law, in fact, this approach is very wrong, after all, the traditional Chinese festival Spring Festival pays attention to a reunion, if you don't go home for the New Year as a daughter-in-law, it will make others laugh.
As a daughter-in-law, you must also be sensible, even if the relationship with your parents-in-law is not good, don't be angry in the New Year, a festival of family reunion, and don't have any conflicts with your mother-in-law and father-in-law.
Of course, if you really don't want to go home for the New Year, you have to discuss it with your husband and explain the reason, after all, sometimes if you say that you don't want to go home for the New Year and don't explain it to your husband because of the relationship with your parents-in-law, it will also worsen the relationship between the husband and wife.
Now because of busy work, many couples do not go home for the New Year, which is also very normal, you can say to your parents-in-law for work reasons, you will not go home for the New Year this year, in fact, your parents-in-law also understand, sometimes when you go home normally, you don't necessarily have to wait for the New Year to go home.
Don't want to go home for the New Year because of a bad relationship with your parents-in-law, you have to consider your husband, and you also have to consider that the Spring Festival is a traditional Chinese festival.
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No, although going home for the New Year is a kind of respect for the elderly and caring for the family, but if you can't go back if you have the necessary conditions, you won't say that it will embarrass your mother-in-law.
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The Chinese New Year is a day for family reunions, and everyone is usually running for life, and there are few opportunities to be together. When it comes to the New Year, it will be happy and lively, and if you don't go back now, your mother-in-law will be a little disappointed.
You have to tell her the reason why you don't go back, because of the epidemic this year, many outsiders** have suggested that they spend the New Year on the spot, and I believe that she will understand you if you tell your mother-in-law.
It is also possible that your parents and mother-in-law are not in the same place, and then you want to go to your parents' side during the Spring Festival, so you have to tell them to spend the next Spring Festival with your mother-in-law.
The explanation is in place, and the old man will understand.
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The in-laws treat you as an outsider, and go back to show you a face! If you don't go back, you won't go back to your home for the New Year! Actually, I really don't know where home is!
I don't know what kind of home is a home! Third, enhance the relationship between husband and wife, talk to your in-laws about your husband's childhood, experience your husband's living environment before marriage, if you don't go, will it tie a knot in the relationship between husband and wife, even if you don't say it, your heart will definitely be uncomfortable, why bother, in order to show fairness, go to your in-laws' house, and go to your mother's house next year. Wouldn't it be nice for everyone to be accommodating and everyone happy.
It's really bad to spend the New Year every year and not want to go back to your mother-in-law's house! It's good, it's sad, her son is your husband, you should go to your mother-in-law for the New Year, you don't want to go back to your mother-in-law's house, you can go to eat a meal and you don't go back to your mother-in-law's house for the New Year, it doesn't matter right or wrong, just explain it, because there are not many children now, even only children, so you should be flexible about the old rules before, you don't need to be too entangled, as long as there is respect, concern, and love in your heart, the elders and juniors should understand each other, tolerate each other, and respect each other.
<> so the big and small festivals are spent at the in-law's house, and you can only go to your mother's house after the festival. Since ancient times, it has been a trend, and those who are older recognize this principle. Young people can't talk to them about the elderly, let alone pick the daughter-in-law's reason, to be tolerant, the husband's parents and your parents all need your care, especially at the Spring Festival, the old people want the whole family to reunite, which one is missing, it is a pity not to put the old qualifications.
Think about it, didn't the reason you choose a daughter-in-law make your own son unhappy? Your son is uncomfortable, can you feel better? As an old man, you must look at things, don't be confined to the situation, treat you as an outsider, and go back to show you a face!
If you don't go back, you won't go back to your home for the New Year! Actually, I really don't know where home is! I don't know what kind of home is a home!
Our family is very open-minded, and we never care who our son and daughter-in-law want to go to for the New Year. The key is to be happy. That's right!
The fault is that everyone thinks differently. Whether the person who gave the bride price received the same dowry is fundamental. If there is, both sides have the confidence to win or lose!!
If not, it's still according to local tradition! When my parents were in that era, they would not argue about which house to spend the New Year in.
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When I went back to my parents' house, my mother didn't let me stretch out my hand, just stayed on the kang, and was happy to see me eat delicious food; When I go to my mother-in-law's house, my mother-in-law will not be happy if there is less work, I will be beaten or I will be tired or complain with a voice that I can hear, and I must pay attention when eating, especially not to clip too many times of meat, my mother-in-law will say that I am greedy. Alas! After all, the daughter-in-law is an outsider!
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To be honest, I'm thinking about that too. This year, I may really choose to let my husband celebrate the New Year at my mother-in-law's house, and I will go back to my parents' house for the New Year. I grew up, I have three families, and the New Year is really different, I actually don't like the New Year, I feel that I am already very happy to live with my husband, but I am uncomfortable in my mother-in-law's house.
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I've experienced it for myself. This is a topic for the ages, and the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has not been compatible since ancient times.
I don't know if the men have ever thought about such a question:
My wife doesn't want to go back to her in-laws' house for the New Year, is it really just because of the long distance? Are we women really afraid of suffering this little bit? In fact, the crux of the matter is that when you take your wife back to your in-law's house for the New Year, do you really feel good about taking care of your wife?
Generally, the daughter-in-law goes to her mother-in-law's house for the New Year, in order not to let her mother-in-law gossip behind her back: "Look at her, she doesn't do any work, is it usually my son who cleans up the house?" "The daughter-in-law has to be busy all the time.
When you are tired from the busy work, you want to rest for a while, and you are worried that your mother-in-law will say, "You will be tired from doing this little work, so what else can you do?" ”
And when the wife is so busy that she is tired enough and is always worried, what is the husband doing? Playing cards with old friends, eating and drinking with relatives and friends, or lying on the sofa watching TV ......Just don't care about your wife: "If you're tired, just rest for a while, I'll do it for you." ”
I remember that my best friend once complained to me, saying that before her husband took her back to her hometown, he specially reminded her: "Wife, I can do whatever I want at home, but when I go back to my hometown, you have to save some face for me." You should do as much work as you can at home, and don't let people say that I married a daughter-in-law who doesn't know anything.
Hehe. For the sake of the so-called "face", can you dictate to your daughter-in-law? The daughter-in-law returned to her mother-in-law's house for the New Year, but the result was not as easy as being in her own home, and she would be suppressed and instigated, it is estimated that no one wants to spend the New Year in such an environment, right?
So, men, if your wife starts to make excuses and doesn't want to go home with you for the New Year, then you should reflect on whether your family has not done a good job for your daughter-in-law.
If you insist on taking your daughter-in-law back to your home for the New Year, then please make sure that your daughter-in-law has a happy New Year at your home. Don't hurt and wronged your daughter-in-law because of your worthless face, and destroy the harmony of the family.
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I have no opinion, happy to go home for the New Year, my mother-in-law is very open-minded, my mother-in-law's house is a few steps away, you can go home and play for a while before eating, my mother-in-law has always hoped that my parents and my sister will go to my house for Chinese New Year's Eve dinner, the crowd can also make me feel different, but my parents have no sons, only two daughters, my sister has not yet married, so my parents do not agree, my mother-in-law will call my parents to eat at noon on the Chinese New Year's Eve every year, they do not come to the Chinese New Year's Eve dinner, the first day of the new year is still together, the relatives are not together, It doesn't matter where the New Year is, anyway, they think I'm a child, happiness is the most important, no one cares what I want, and I will let my husband accompany me, all kinds of delicious food, and the children don't have to worry about me, it's just a magnified fake.
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Recently married, it takes five minutes to walk from my mother-in-law's house to my mother's house, but we can't spend the New Year at our mother's house when we get married, except for those who marry far away, of course. The customs are all the same. Years ago, I was busy, and I had to steam bean paste, vegetable buns, jujube rolls, and flower cakes.
Croquettes, lotus root sticks, fish, tofu. They all use stoves and cauldrons, and the fire at the bottom of the pot has not stopped for two days during the Chinese New Year. Mother-in-law will generally buy a sheep after planting wheat, feed it for more than two months during the New Year, such mutton is delicious, peel the sheep on the twenty-eighth day of the New Year, and stew the mutton immediately after frying things.
I seem to have a soft spot for fire, probably since I was a child, and I have a complex. Thirty in the morning to stomp on the dumpling filling, in the afternoon the women's dumplings, the men's couplets, to the ancestral grave (we call it Shanglin). Shanglin Nu can't go, and in the afternoon, I heard the sound of firecrackers outside making dumplings.
We don't have the Chinese New Year's Eve dinner, we just eat dumplings at night, nothing else. When I was a child, the lunch of the Chinese New Year's Eve was like a random stew, several dishes were boiled in a pot, and some noodles were put on it. My eldest aunts and sisters-in-law will bring a bowl to grandma, and we will also serve a bowl to the second grandfather on the other side.
There is no difference between being at my mother-in-law's house and my own home, I also help my mother work at home, and I also help work at my mother-in-law's house, and the main thing is the elderly.
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With my in-laws and parents in the same city, this is even more difficult! Alas, after a year of hard work, tired like a fool! When I go to my mother-in-law's house, I treat you as a daughter-in-law, and I should do all kinds of things!
To put it bluntly, we really don't owe anyone, you haven't given birth to me, you haven't raised me, and you haven't spent half a dime. And when I returned to my parents' house, the family that gave birth to me and raised me, I was all kinds of freedom, all kinds of distress, I didn't have to do anything, and I had to feed myself all kinds of delicious food.
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Since getting married, I haven't been back to my home for the New Year, the first year because of the birth of a child, there is no way, the second year I bought a house, the custom of my mother-in-law's family is that I have to spend three New Year's in a new house, and I said that I will go back to my house for the New Year in the fifth year, but my mother-in-law said that I haven't returned to my hometown for three years, and I have to go back, which is understandable, so I didn't say anything, and said that I would go back next year, but it was really at that time, hehe, angry I said directly, I want to go back to you yourself, bring the child with me, I can't ask for leave from work, so I won't go back! The result is that the in-laws brought the child back to their hometown, I gambled that I didn't go back, my husband had to stay with me, the two of us spent the New Year alone, and then the second year gave birth to the second child, the due date is close to the New Year, no way not to dare to run around, said to go back this year, but the husband said, the old man (husband's grandparents) has not seen the second, the second is a son, the old couple is a bit patriarchal, and it is the only seedling, I have to go back, saying that there is no old man in my family anyway, it doesn't matter, I really want to slap him to death! My parents, as elders, are not considered elderly?
My mother-in-law is over eighty years old, not an old man! Sometimes when I think about it, I really want to beat him up! It's true!
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The most worrying thing every year is to go back to my mother-in-law's house for the New Year, it's really annoying, my mother-in-law's house is in the countryside, cooking is the bottom of the cauldron, I really won't, the toilet is outside the street door, there is no running water, there is no sewer, my husband bought a lot of things during the New Year, but at noon, my mother-in-law's house will make a fixed 4 dishes, I have not changed in the past ten years and eight years, in fact, I can't even finish a dish, just finish eating at noon, I have to prepare dumplings, everything is ready, we are very cold in the northeast, there is no heating in the kitchen, and I shiver when I work in the kitchen, Mother-in-law is used to it, people don't tremble, wrapping sauerkraut stuffing and leek filling, sauerkraut from the tank is fished out, washed and chopped, leeks are washed and cut, meat is taken out of the freezer, and so the dishes are chopped, see how much can be thawed, just cut the point, the noodles are now and, every year will remind the mother-in-law to take out the meat early, but will not listen, and do not say, other people's processes have been done on the first day, only my family has everything now, depressed to death, the most important thing is that the whole two pots of vegetable filling, I really want to die, When the bag put the panel on the kang, I rolled the dough on the kang, wrapped this afternoon, I don't know how many times to adjust the posture, sitting tired waist, squatting tired legs, kneeling and setting aside the cover, I have lived thirty this year This day is the most depressed, no good food, no good drink, tired half to death, our family of three stayed in the hometown for two days, mother-in-law for more than ten years do not know what to do, thirty years do not know what to do, which of you is like this? But in the fourth year of junior high school, my mother-in-law was busy from early in the morning, preparing a table of dishes, because the fourth year of junior high school girl came home, (one year we didn't say hello on the fourth day of junior high school, and suddenly came home to see the scene) It turns out that my mother-in-law doesn't know what to do, but the people who go home are different, so she doesn't know what to do, since last year, I told my husband, I won't go to your house for the New Year, if you feel bad, then let's divorce first, and then remarry after the New Year, I'm 40 years old, I just want to have a good New Year, I don't want to live so depressed, I won't go in the future, I don't have to look at the four tasteless dishes anymore, and I don't have to wrap two big pots of stuffed dumplings!
This is a contradictory topic, think about it, there is actually a problem of communication with your parents, for example, you have been back once before, and the time spent is relatively long, so that your parents can also know that your filial piety and you are not easy outside, from the parents, it is enough to go back to see them for a long time, and usually report safety and so on, at least I think so, if you go back at the end of the year, there are indeed a lot of practical problems there, such as tickets are not easy to buy, Go back to the New Year, the funds can be imagined, so mail 1k yuan to your parents, choose not to go back to feel more in line with your current situation, of course, if you are on your own or go back, save yourself alone outside, this feeling of 30 years is very uncomfortable. I have personal experience, think about it for yourself, what I said is just for reference.
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