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Because the tone of one party's question is a little out of line with the other party's mind, they start to quarrel, and who will be comfortable listening to your tone.
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The most inexplicable quarrel I ever had with my parents was caused by a single look. Mom felt that the eyes of Lao Douzi talking to her were wrong, and there was a sense that she was not pleasing to the eye, so she quarreled about this.
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Watching TV, my father was discussing history according to the plot, and my mother said at this time, today's cabbage is quite fresh. Then the mother was criticized, her thoughts were deserted, her vision was narrow, she lived in her own world, and she never considered the atmosphere, etc. Even so, they never divorced.
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In my impression, there is almost no quarrel between parents, at most it is a mix, but once, I was very impressed, that is, my father went out to play cards, played for a day, and did not come back at night, and then my mother was very angry, it is said that I went to play cards table, and after coming over, I played and scolded my father, and I couldn't say it, I was still young at that time, and I didn't dare to speak, I didn't dare to block the fight, but later, my father rarely went out to play, and my mother didn't care so much, and then I didn't see them quarrel.
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My parents would turn small things like stepping on the dirty floor into an inexplicable quarrel because my father or mother didn't change their shoes or listen to persuasion when they entered the door.
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My parents often quarreled inexplicably, for example, my mother would fight my dad if she was in trouble with housework, sometimes for no reason but to vent her temper.
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For example, they may quarrel with each other because they didn't mop the floor today, and the other person doesn't care, I think just go and mop the floor immediately, there is no need to argue.
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This kind of thing is quite embarrassing, and I am afraid of meeting acquaintances, so I hide it.
My daughter, 23 years old, my parents are now divorced, my mother still loves my dad, but my dad doesn't love him anymore (my mom is very controlling and nagging), so my dad can't stand it.
Some time ago, my relatives introduced me to a boy, one year younger than me, I told my parents that I didn't want to go, my dad said to go and see it's okay, in case I met the right one, I want to go and see it, it doesn't matter, anyway, I won't get along with him, after reading it, my dad was very satisfied, asked me how I felt, I said I don't like it very much.
The boy in the back came a few more times, and my dad liked him very much and thought he was very down-to-earth, but I told you the truth, he was really good, but it was not the one I liked.
Later, my mother came back from out of town and wanted to go to his house to see the family conditions. She thinks that his parents are very good, and they will not quarrel for three days after marriage, and my mother is very satisfied.
Not long ago, on my mother's birthday, I called that boy to dinner, because she was going to go to another place the next day, and said something else to the boy, and asked me to be good with others before leaving.
The reason for the quarrel with my parents is because, during the Mid-Autumn Festival, the boy asked me to go to his house for dinner, and I said that I was very busy with work and probably didn't have time. But I think that the Mid-Autumn Festival, the meaning of family reunion, I am not related to others, what does it mean to go to someone's house to spend the Mid-Autumn Festival, I want to take the opportunity to explain to others. Before that, I called my parents and said it, and my mother reacted very strongly, which probably means:
If you miss this, can you meet a better one, a woman is young for so many years, do you think you are very good, find someone who loves you, and you can almost get it. **After hanging up, the phone is out of power and turned off, and I am busy with work, so I turned it off and was charging, and after I turned it on, my mother sent me WeChat,: If you don't pick me up**Forget it, I've already pulled you into the blacklist, don't contact me in the future, anyway, you grow up and your wings are hard, don't listen to me.
Then the next day, I talked to the boy, and the boy said that we had different views, so it was better to forget it. My dad called ** and asked me what I wanted to do, such a good person you don't know how to cherish. Then he said that you can make money now, and you don't need us to raise it, and you can do whatever you want in the future, and I don't care about you.
Actually, I don't think I've done anything wrong about this, I said from the beginning that I didn't like it, from beginning to end. They didn't respect my opinion, they thought the boy was very good, I admit he was very good, but I really didn't like it, there was not only that good man in the world, and I didn't understand why they would treat their own daughter like this for an outsider.
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The things of life are very complicated. The reason for the quarrel with my parents must be the same. Not one.
Fixed mode. When encountering problems, you should patiently explain and explain. Quarrels don't solve the problem.
Only calm down and communicate patiently. Here's how to solve the problem. The quarrel made the family unhappy, and the problem was not resolved.
Effect. Will you quarrel next time?
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Especially when you were young, if anything, are you often irritable now, you will lose your temper when you encounter a little thing, or do you often involuntarily be afraid, nervous, and your limbs will be very stiff, then these may come from the influence of your original family on you. From a psychological point of view, when a child is young, if the parents quarrel for a long time, it can have these serious effects on the child.
The first is that parents always quarrel, in fact, the child will be very angry in his heart, he will think that you are annoyed to death, can you stop arguing, you are not finished, can you stop for a while? But because you're a child, you don't dare and can't fully express your anger, so what happens to that anger? He's going to keep it in your heart, and when you grow up, he's been angry for so long, and he's always going to be angry.
It will explode and make you emotionally upset and emotionally out of control.
The second situation is that the parents quarrel too much, not only noisy, but sometimes even copy things, use knives, and even hurt the child. So if you think about how your child will feel at this time, he must be very nervous and very scared. Many children tell me that when their parents quarrel, they only dare to huddle in a small corner, and they don't even dare to get out of the air.
If this is the case, then your nervousness and fear will continue to accumulate until now, resulting in your body will not be very soft, very stiff, and even when you talk to others, others may stare at each other and raise their voices, and your body will involuntarily tense up all of a sudden.
The third situation is that the parents have quarreled all their lives, and it doesn't matter what they do, but after the child witnesses the failed marriage of his parents, he already has a dangerous prediction about marriage, and he will feel that he is talking about marriage. It must not be happy, so if he has such thoughts, when he grows up, he may be afraid of marriage, because he feels that marriage is the beginning of burying her happiness in life. So I've only listed some of the above, so if you're a parent, be sure to learn how to manage your marriage, and a good relationship between us and husband is the best gift you can give to your children.
If you are a child who grew up in such an environment, then you may have to learn some psychological knowledge to heal the wounds of your own family of origin. Don't be afraid, trust me, these can be done.
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may be because their three views do not agree, their temper is also relatively short-tempered, they can't tolerate each other, they can't communicate when they have something, they care about each other, and they don't know how to back down.
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The economy is the main aspect, and the two are often super over money, and there are serious communication problems between the two. I've been tired of watching it for so many years, and when I was a child, I stayed next to them when I watched them arguing, and I didn't care whether I was holding a knife or throwing something, and I wouldn't persuade them to fight. When they grow up, when they quarrel, they say that they want to quarrel and go out to quarrel.
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Parents who often quarrel may be due to incompatible personalities, poor economic foundation, and different ideas. At this time, the child should act as a peacemaker, help the parents reconcile, and wish your family harmony, happiness and health.
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The possible reasons are as follows1. Unbalanced division of labor
In the process of raising a baby, if the division of labor between husband and wife is unbalanced, and one of the spouses takes on more responsibilities and workload, it may lead to the accumulation of dissatisfaction and pressure. For example, if one partner takes on most of the childcare tasks and the other is less involved, this can lead to conflict and conflict.
2. Inconsistent concepts
There may be differences in the concepts and methods of parenting between husband and wife, which can easily lead to quarrels. For example, disagreements about children's education styles, living habits, and schedules may lead to arguments and conflicts.
3. Fatigue and stress
Parenting is a onerous task that often requires a lot of time, energy, and thought from both spouses. For a long time, due to the accumulation of fatigue and stress dissipation, couples are prone to mood swings and impatience, which in turn leads to quarrels.
4. Poor communication
Communication between husband and wife is an important way to solve problems and resolve conflicts. If communication is poor, both parties are unable to effectively express their needs and opinions, which can lead to misunderstandings and escalation of conflicts.
5. Compression of time and personal space
Bringing a baby consumes the couple's time and personal space, and the time for interaction and communication between the couple may be reduced, while the needs and interests of the individual may be limited. In this case, tension and conflict between couples may increase.
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