The classic joke network is irritable, asking for funny quotes, and I ve been irritable lately

The twilight rain moves the eaves bells, and only the shadow is floating.

One day, there was a gummy walking down the street.

As she walked, she suddenly said, "Ahhh My legs are so soft! ”

Once upon a time there was a man surnamed Yu, and one day when he was hungry, he ate himself.

A classmate named Xiao Cai was walking on the road when he was suddenly picked up.

There was a Mr. Banana who was dating his girlfriend and was walking down the street, and it was very hot, so Mr. Banana took off his clothes, and then his girlfriend fell.

There was a polar bear and a penguin playing together, and the penguin plucked the stuffy fur off its body one by one, and when it was done, it said to the polar bear, "It's so cold!" ”

When the polar bear heard this, he plucked the hair off his body one by one, turned to the penguin and said, "It's really cold!" ”

One day, Mung Bean committed suicide and jumped down from the 5th floor, shed a lot of blood, and turned into a red bean; kept bleeding pus, and turned into soybeans again; The wound scarred and finally became a black bean.

One day, Doushabao was walking on the road, and suddenly there was a car accident, and the skin of his belly was broken, and before he died, he looked at his stomach and said, "Oh, it turns out that I am Doushabao." ”

2011-07-14 11:16Reply.

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Matchstick suddenly felt a itch on his head, so he reached out and scratched it, and burned himself to death by scratching it.

Xiao Ming got a new haircut, and when he came to school the next day, his classmates saw his new hairstyle and said with a smile: Xiao Ming, your head shape looks like a kite! Xiao Ming felt very aggrieved, so he ran outside to cry. Crying and crying, he flew.

Once upon a time there was a bird.

Every day he passes by a cornfield.

But unfortunately.

One day there was a fire in that cornfield.

All the corn turned into popcorn.

After the bird flew over.

I thought it was snowing, and I died of cold.

The little penguin asked his grandmother one day, "Grandma, am I a penguin?" ”

yes, of course you're a penguin. ”

The little penguin asked his father, "Daddy, am I a penguin?" ”

yes, you're a penguin, what's wrong? "But, why do I feel so cold? ”

A pair of corns fell in love.

So they decided to get married.

On the day of the wedding, one corn could not find the other.

The corn asked the popcorn next to him: Have you seen our corn?

Popcorn: Honey, people are wearing wedding dresses.

One day a green apple went out shopping, and suddenly he saw a red apple, and he said to the red apple.

You have a crush on me, otherwise why blush.

**In class, the teacher played a piece of Beethoven's music.

Xiao Ming asked Xiao Hua: "Do you understand?" ”

Xiaohua: "Yes".

Xiao Ming: "Then do you know what the teacher is playing?" ”

Xiaohua: "Piano. ”

Xiaohong asked: Do you use your right hand or your left hand when you stir coffee?

Xiaomei said: Right hand.

Xiaohong said: Oh, you are so good, you are not afraid of burns, like I use a spoon.

Little A said to Little B: Dig the plug ...It's raining outside!! See?

Xiao B was very excited: yes, I saw you.

Xincheng joke I think your own mood is suitable for what, you just send it directly, if you are in a particularly good mood today, then post a joke that is suitable for your mood.

Jokes about moods, in fact, everyone's mood is different, and the new forms that develop every day are also different, since there is a bad mood or a good mood. Then you have to show your feelings.

I think each person's mood must be different, so the mood described in this situation must be different.

I was in a very bad mood, I felt that I couldn't release it, and I just wanted to find someone to release it properly.

1.Without that light in the darkness, I fear that you are afraid of the dark like a child.

2.I didn't know when I died, gazing at the sky so desolate, and the mournful cry of the snowbird, slanting away from the sky, I saw your face appear above the blue sky, and I laughed, because I saw you, happy as a child who didn't grow up.

3.The night gave me black eyes, but it made me fall in love with the pain that the night gave me.

4.I can't think of killing me, and I can't think of killing as many people as I want.

5.The sound of the cello is like a river, the left bank is my unforgettable memory, the right bank is my bright years worth grasping, and the middle is my faint sentimentality every year!

6.I always gaze at the sorrow of the sun rising and the moon sinking homeless.

7.Because I know that there is always a smiling Gu Xiaobei waiting for me at the end of the road, which makes me brave.

8.The best thing is to be with you often.

9.How torn jeans stand with evening gowns, how can my guitar play with your piano ensemble.

10.I count your laughter every day, but when you laugh, you're so lonely.

11.There is so much warmth in my life, I gave it all to you, but you left me, you told me how to smile at others in the future.

12.There was once a smile in my life, but in the end it dissipated like a fog, and that smile became a turbulent river buried deep in my heart, unable to swim across, and the sound of the river became my desperate song every day and night.

13.The hustle and bustle of the world, the joy and happiness of the world, like a clear stream, in the wind, in front of my eyes, gurgling by, warmth gushing out like a spring, I have no extravagant hopes, I just want you to be happy, not sad.

14.We are like needles on the surface, constantly turning, turning and watching time rush away, but we can't do anything about it.

15.Just when I thought that nothing had changed, as long as I was happy, I could re-plunge into your arms and never come out, in fact, everything had changed, I was like a nautilus hiding in a shell and sleeping, and when I poked my head out to look at the world, the sea where I used to live had become an unattainable mountain, and I was a fossil frozen on the cliff.

16.The space formed by the song is free to come and go as the years go freely, so the faces of the people who are still protected have not changed and a huge and unending hatred.

When you are in a bad mood, you feel that your fate is very bad, why is it always yourself who is unlucky, and you feel that there is no point in living.

1.What you once had, don't forget. What you can't get, you should cherish it even more. Once it's your own, don't give up. What has been lost, keep it as a memory.

2.It's better to fail in what you love than to succeed in what you hate.

3.Hope and trust are the tails of lizards, and even if they are cut off, they will grow again.

4.Happiness is not immortality, not big fish and big meat, not power and opposition. Happiness is the fulfillment of every tiny wish in life. You have to eat when you want to eat, and someone will love you when you want to be loved.

5.Love is the light, friendship is the shadow, when the light goes out, you will find that you are surrounded by shadows. A friend is the one who can give you strength at the end.

As an aside, heart disease medicine heart medicine, you look at the quotations, it can't solve the problem at all, that will make you more irritable, it is recommended that you do a sport you like, make yourself tired, sleep quietly, get up in the morning, you are fine.

Go to "Glutinous Bar" If you need it, I'll give you an invitation code.