How about the most serious injuries of a good child, and why is the most serious injury of a good ch

In the eyes of Chinese parents, a well-behaved child = an obedient and likable child. The label of a well-behaved child makes a "well-behaved" child form such a self-awareness:

1. I obey adults in everything in order to get the love of adults; So the good child will always live in the contradiction between his own world and the world of others;

2. I am independent in everything and do not cause trouble to adults, so that I can be praised by adults; So the good boy will always grit his teeth and be strong;

3. I learned to observe words and emotions in everything, so that I could find out what adults like and dislike; So the good child always suppresses his preferences and emotions; We pinched out the ideal child in our minds with our standards, who doesn't want to, and created a child's puppet-like life.

I have 2 pieces of advice for parents of well-behaved children:

1. Our love for children should be unconditional. It is not because children are well-behaved, sensible, obedient and endearing, that we love children, but that no matter what children are, we should love them from the bottom of our hearts; With our safe love, children don't have to be so themselves in this life;

2. We need healthy children, not perfect children. We all like well-behaved children because they are easy to get along with and the educational challenges are relatively small. But this is not healthy for children, we need to think about whether we need healthy children or perfect children.

3. We don't label our children. Whether it is well-behaved or naughty, we do not put any labels on children, children's development is infinitely possible, why let labels limit their infinite possibilities in life?

The so-called good children are more concerned about other people's opinions, sometimes in order to take into account the feelings of others, they will make themselves more aggrieved, in other words, when one of the anti-dumping and anti-dumping parties must be hurt, the good child will always choose to let himself be hurt to take care of the feelings of others, so that others are in a more comfortable state. There is also the fact that good children are naturally kind, but they often hurt themselves because of their kindness and can't bear to hurt others. You treat others with your kindness, but in exchange for not necessarily praise and care.

Some people will get more harm because of your kindness, and you will be hurt again and again, and you will choose to forgive them, and they will bring you more harm, so the good child will hurt the most.

There are also good children who will not vent their psychological unhappiness, in order to take into account the feelings of others, not to embarrass others, they will choose to suppress the unhappiness in their own psychology, in the long run, the hurt in the heart will accumulate little by little, and the small hurt will slowly accumulate into a big injury.

Another reason is that in order to cater to their so-called good child title, they will deliberately follow the way others expect you to do things, but it is not the way they really like to deal with it, so that after completing a thing, pay a lot of effort, and there will be no sense of joy or accomplishment of success, so that the pay and return can not reach a balance, and in the long run, they will feel that their spirit is hollowed out, this kind of suppression of their own inner practice is also a chronic injury, and it will also lead to a serious injury in the long run. A single type will hurt more severely, and sometimes even three injuries will be stacked together, so of course it will hurt more severely.

A well-behaved child is generally the kind of obedient child, he will do whatever his parents tell him to do, he will not do things against the wishes of his parents, and he is very obedient in the eyes of teachers and parents. But the reason why the well-behaved child is the most seriously injured is the same as "the anger of a good-tempered person is generally out of control".

Because he usually does things according to the wishes of his parents, and everything he does is agreed by some elders such as his parents and teachers, and the elders like him very much and give him a lot of hope, and when he does some small things wrong because of some aspects, he receives a little injury, and he may not be able to stand it, because he has gone according to the route given to him by everyone, he thinks that he has done a good job, and he doesn't want to live up to everyone's expectations, so once he makes a mistake, your punishment for him or his own spiritual punishment, It will all be fatal. The gap between expectations and disappointments can be devastating to immature children.

When I was in elementary school, I had a very good learner, who was always the president of my class, and I was also very good friends with him, his parents ate and drank well every day like a fairy, and every teacher in the class also liked him. He himself is also very fond of learning, he is very serious in class every day, and when I go to his house to play, he also listens to his parents, and he will do his homework when he is told to do it, and say goodbye to me when he is finished. But once he didn't get the first place in the class in the exam, he broke down and cried, and he went to the playground alone to cry and run, and he couldn't slow down that strength for a long time.

It is precisely because he studies well and he is obedient that he thinks he is already the best, and he has worked hard to live up to the hopes of his parents, but a small setback will defeat him, because his parents have given him too much hope, but it has become a shackle that binds him, and once he does not do his best, his shackles will become tighter and tighter, making the injury very serious.

A very well-behaved child is very well-behaved, so he may have low self-esteem, because he really wants to do something, but his parents don't allow it, and he listens to his parents because he is well-behaved, so he has not been exposed to some things. Seeing that others can do anything, can try anything, he will feel as if he can't do anything, because he is used to being a good child, so he will think twice about doing things, and he will not touch it if he touches it and thinks it will be a bad thing, so he will control himself. Suppress your desire to try.

Because it's very well-behaved, it always thinks about others. Every good boy is a very sensible person, so he often gets hurt and doesn't like to tell others, and he is also very accommodating to others when they do bad things to him.

For parents, they always don't want them to be sad, so they try their best to do their best, but in fact, they have a lot of pain in their hearts, but they don't like to share it with others, so the injury of a good child is actually the most serious.

Because good babies are the most obedient, they have always obeyed the words of their parents and teachers. The teacher said not to have conflicts with others, and then they obediently did so, and never took the initiative to provoke others. The teacher said that you should treat your friends as warm as a spring breeze.

And then they are stupid, and the people around them are very nice. The teacher said that when others encounter difficulties, you must help them in time. So they are always responsive to others.

Even if it is not beneficial to themselves, they will do it for others.

The family education that a good baby has received since childhood is a blessing. Therefore, they have been wronged and suffered outside, and they have never spoken up. After a long time, they felt that this was what they should do.

They are accustomed to accommodating others and accommodating others. Then, after being hurt, he habitually hid to heal himself. They don't reject others, they don't protect themselves, and they don't know how to resist when they are hurt.

Good babies are especially easy to be used by some people with bad intentions, they feel that good babies are easier to bully, and they can call at will, anyway, they will not refuse or resist. So the good baby is used as a gun by those people, and all the dirty work will be done for the good baby, and he is just taking advantage of the fisherman. Sometimes, in front of some things, good babies are often dumb and can't say what they are suffering from.

Good babies are relatively pure-minded people, they don't understand those intrigues and intrigues, so they often become victims of these years. When a strong child is bullied, he can fight back at the first time, and while protecting himself, he also gives the bully a heavy counterattack by the way. But good babies are always beaten, so every time they are hurt, they are the hardest.

Because a well-behaved child is easily ignored by others, many things are taken for granted by adults who think that he will understand, and as a result, it will bring psychological damage.

My brother is like this, for some reason he and I have been staying with my grandparents when we were young, without the love of our parents, they are precocious, and they are very sensitive to the emotions of those around them. When I was in junior high school, I went to school in the city and left him alone in that place. At that time, I didn't like to be in the countryside.,Probably a little disgusted in it.,3 years he was free and then took the bus to my sister-in-law's house to see me.,At that time, I thought he was very well-behaved and sensible.,Should understand me.,So I haven't been much back.。

Later, when I finally understood that I felt guilty about him, it was already a little late, and now I remember what he said, "Your concern has gone to ** in those three years", which was the only time he said when he quarreled with me, and I remember it deeply. His emotions have been suppressed and suppressed and finally exploded, I think it would be nice if I could do it all over again, but unfortunately life is not if.

So care for those good children with your heart, they will cry and make trouble to eat candy, they shouldn't be less, they just don't want you to make it difficult to say it, but their hearts also crave that candy.

Why is it that only bear children get the most care and eat the sweetest sugar? Should we ignore well-behaved children because they are well-behaved? I think a good boy should be the one who eats the sweetest sugar.

They don't cry or make trouble, they don't try to get the attention of their parents, they don't deliberately take the favor of their parents, what is the reason why they do this, isn't it just to let their parents praise their parents? Why should parents ignore it?

Imagine how you would feel if you worked hard to cook for a day and waited for your child to come back to eat, but the child said that he had eaten outside? Children are the same, they work very hard to be well-behaved, just looking forward to the praise of their parents, and parents can't take their children's well-behaved for granted. Appropriate compliments and comforts are important.

If there are two children in the family, one older and one young, the parents will definitely ask the eldest to be well-behaved and take care of the younger ones, but the parents will not even realize that the eldest himself has no way to take care of himself, but because his parents said so, he tried his best to do his best, and he wanted to get the praise of his parents, but the parents took it for granted, and even the small children bumped into the boss and would be responsible for the boss, but the boss he was just a child who was not a few years older than the second child!

Why does a good child hurt the most? Because they are well-behaved, they will not say their sadness, but they just hold it in their hearts, and when the child grows up, the parents find that the child has not become their ideal appearance, they look well-behaved and obedient, but in fact, the relationship with the parents is not so close and not so harmonious. Because they know that no matter how well-behaved their parents are, they will not praise them.

Why can't you give a good child a candy to eat? Tell him that you are really obedient, that you are doing well, that you are very well-behaved. You ask them to be mature, you ask them to be little adults, but they are just immature children, parents are good to them, bad is bad, it is very intuitive for them, so you should keep praising well-behaved children, because parents you must know that children are not obliged to be so well-behaved.