How parents can help their children navigate puberty

As your child grows up, have you ever felt like this?

The child, who was always tired of crying in our arms and wanted to cuddle with us, suddenly did not want to have intimate physical contact with his parents;

Every day when he comes back to talk to us about "twittering" and can't stop a child, he suddenly doesn't want to reveal his heart to his parents;

Children who once saw us as role models and had to consult us on everything they did suddenly became unwilling to listen to their parents and were critical of us in every way.

From nothing to nothing to nothing to say, it seems as if suddenly everything has changed and caught parents off guard.

Is the child changing too fast? Or are the parents too poorly adaptable?

No, it's neither! The real reason is that children are going through a very important moment – adolescence.

Carl, a Harvard scholar and clinical psychologist. Pickhart, with his personal experience and more than 30 years of counseling practice, in the book "Welcome to Adolescence", tells us about the importance, criticality and uniqueness of adolescence from a positive perspective, and provides practical solutions to help millions of families solve the common problems of adolescent development.

In the book, the author depicts the blueprint for the growth of adolescent children, systematically and deeply dismantles the problems of adolescence, and constructively puts forward a variety of practical ideas and solutions for parents from the perspective of developmental psychology, so that parents and children can change from "opposition and conflict" to "friendly cooperation", and then successfully pass adolescence.

Let's take a look at how to solve adolescent problems such as parent-child conflict, school boredom, emotionality, peer pressure, and addiction to the Internet through positive guidance.

For parents, adolescence is a special stage, and it is also a stage when the child's physical and mental state is constantly changing.

From completely obeying the instructions of parents to never compromising at the slightest discomfort, the seemingly "difficult" adolescence is not static, it has different characteristics at different stages.

When should parents guide their children to accompany them? And when should I let it go completely? If we want to maximize the effect of our parenting, we need to understand the psychological characteristics and behavioral performance of children at all stages of adolescence, and prescribe the right medicine to help children redefine and evaluate themselves.

Introduction: If parents want to help their children go through adolescence smoothly, they should see if their children have troubles in adolescence. Some children always like to talk to their parents during puberty, and if the adolescent child is more rebellious, the parents should treat the child in an appropriate way.

Today, I would like to tell you how you can help your child through adolescence as a parent.

If a parent is always looking to help their child through adolescence, the best way is to help the child in time when he needs help. Some children often like to work against their parents when they are young, and parents should correct their children's attitudes in time to prevent their children from behaving badly. Some children are naughty when they are young, and parents should also dissuade their children in time to prevent them from making irreparable mistakes.

When children are young, they often like to chat with their parents, and parents should actively cooperate with their children and learn to take the initiative to chat with their children, so that children can know what they should do. Children like to be with their parents when they are young, if parents want their children to be with themselves very well, they must first understand their children's growth, so that children can learn to learn better, so that children will be very happy.

Parents must learn to respect and trust, only in this way can children get better development, and children will feel that their parents love them very much. If a child resists his parents a lot when he is young, parents should also tell their children in time that this is bad behavior, and talk to them patiently. Some children are reluctant to do homework, parents should not assign a lot of tasks to their children, which will make children feel uncomfortable, parents must learn to communicate with their children, and have correct communication with their children, so that children will be very happy.

If the child likes to work against his parents when he is young, the parents should change the child in time.

Praise the child more, don't force the child to do things that the child doesn't like, don't impose your own ideas on the child, you must care more about the child, and accompany the child more.

Parents should accompany their children well at this stage, do not put any pressure on their children, and should also guide their children well, so as not to make mistakes in the process of growing up.

Children should be helped in a scientifically effective way of smiling in a round way. Give the child some psychological guidance to accompany the child, and let the child understand his own mind and position. Talk to your child often and listen to him often.

Usually you must care more about your children, pay more attention to your children's empty bends, take your children out to play, encourage your children more, reward your children more, don't beat your children, don't scold your children, and don't be in a hurry to deny your children.

1. Parents should have a correct mentality.

This period is very special, children will not obey their parents' arrangements for everything in middle school like elementary school, and some rebellious behaviors may occur at this time. Parents should recognize that their children are not acting against each other intentionally, but rather that they are trying to reflect their immature self-consciousness. Parents should set a correct attitude and stay calm in the confrontation of their children, and avoid overreacting.

2. Teach children to deal with interpersonal relationships.

When children enter the campus of junior high school, they will be separated from their familiar classmates in primary school, and when the design is an unfamiliar face and an unfamiliar campus environment, children will inevitably have a sense of fear in their hearts, which will also be a new challenge for children. Parents should help their children adjust in time, teach them to deal with interpersonal relationships, and tell their children that others will be afraid of the same as themselves, so be brave enough to make friends with new classmates.

3. Help children adjust their learning methods.

We all know that the learning of primary school, the heavy limbs will be concentrated in the three subjects of language, mathematics and English, and the child will face the situation of the joint examination of seven subjects when entering junior high school, and the difficulty of the subject is also greatly increased, the learning method of the child in primary school is not suitable for counting socks at this stage, parents should keep abreast of the child's learning situation, help the child adjust the learning method, so as not to keep up with the learning progress and lose confidence.

4. Develop the habit of being organized.

Parents should help their children develop organized habits in a timely manner, tidy up their learning utensils, and arrange time in advance for homework in each subject. In this way, when you need to use it, you will not be looking around, you will be upset, and it is easy to affect your learning mood, and when you are organized, you can greatly improve the efficiency of learning.

There will be a lot of changes in adolescent children, they are sensitive, impulsive, eager to contact the opposite sex, disobedient to parents and teachers, these are considered "dangerous" signs, so many adults feel very headaches for children at this stage. In fact, adolescence is a stage that everyone must go through in their lives, and many people describe him as the best time in his life, because he represents that the child is finally about to cross the threshold of becoming an adult. This is not only a physical threshold, but also a psychological threshold.

The main reason why it is difficult is that adults do not have the right way to deal with them. So what can parents do to make their children go through adolescence smoothly?

The arrival of puberty means that the child has become an adult from the biological level, and even the psychological changes will occur at this time. They are more sensitive than ever, self-conscious, and more concerned about the opposite sex. These changes make each child behave at a loss, and parents do not answer their questions, but still treat their children in the same way as before, which is bound to cause some conflicts.

From this point of view, parents must start by respecting their children. They need to face up to the fact that their children have grown up, and at the same time they need to treat their children as adults, and the way adults get along with each other is based on respect.

There are a lot of changes in the adolescent child, which is very different from what the parents have in mind, so they feel that the child has become bad. In fact, being alone, being disobedient, and contradicting parents are not shortcomings, but adults can't accept these changes. From the perspective of results, children's physiological and psychological changes are inevitable, so in order to solve the conflict, parents can only adjust their personal thinking and adopt a new model to get along with their children, which needs to be very important to try to be positive and considerate of children.

Growing up is destined to be lonely, which is why adults often prefer to be alone. When children enter adolescence, they will become more and more eager for private space, and at this time, adults should not interfere too much in each other's lives, and "respect for change" can cultivate a more harmonious parent-child relationship.

For adolescent children, parents need to pay more attention to their children, at this stage they are easily rebellious and easy to do some bad things. Therefore, parents should guide their children correctly and pull them into the right track to go through adolescence smoothly. First of all, parents need to care more about their children, care about their situation at school, be friends with their children as much as possible, talk to them as friends, understand their thoughts, and know their living situation.

At this stage, children hate their parents' nagging very much, so parents don't nag more when they care about their children, just communicate with them normally, help them groom, and for some things they are more curious about and want to try, parents can accompany their children to do it together during the holidays, and when school starts, they need to change back to their original appearance. <>

For example, children will feel that dyeing their hair is very individual, they want to try, if the parents directly tell him that he can't do this, but they will be more rebellious, it is better for parents to accompany their children to dye their hair during the holidays, to experience such a freshness, and then return the hair to its original state when school starts, tell the children what kind of things to do at what stage, the holidays can let themselves indulge, but when the school starts, you need to study hard. At this stage, parents can tell their children that smoking and fighting will hurt their physical health, which is not a cool behavior, and they can try to persuade their children, and use their idols to tell them how they are so good, and they don't do these behaviors. <>

As a parent, you should actively enlighten your children and pull them when they are about to go in the wrong direction, so that they can get back on track. Children are rebellious because they are curious and have a wrong understanding of things, so parents need to put their minds in order and let them know what they can and can't do. <>

First, care more about your children and give them a sense of security; Second, give your child a little space and discuss everything with him. Third, play with him and do what he likes.

1. The nervous system of adolescents gradually matures, their thinking ability is strengthened, their self-awareness is getting stronger and stronger, and they think that they can be independent and no longer rely on their parents as before; 2. The appearance of physiological secondary sexual characteristics makes children have obvious gender differences, which then affects emotional characteristics, and adolescents are prone to emotional instability; 3. Parents are too strict or spoil their children, resulting in rebellion or excessive demand; 4. Unable to adapt to the pressure of daily life; 5. The influence of the learning atmosphere, the education and guidance methods of teachers and parents are not suitable for the age characteristics of children.

6. The impact of bad peer relationships.