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Parents should first be emotionally calm.
Then talk about things, distinguish between right and wrong, praise those who do well in time, and correct estimates in time if they do not do well.
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Hello, happy with your question.
Essential elements of a good communication pattern with your child:Encourage your child to open up and express their emotions and thoughts authentically.
Listen carefully to what your child says to you and respond to what she says in a calm, positive way, whether your child is saying good or good news, or expressing bad emotions such as anger, shame, sadness, and fear.
Pay attention to your child's non-verbal expressions, such as body language, tone of voice, and phrasing, so that you can truly understand what your child is trying to say.
You need to take into account your child's age, level of understanding, and attention span.
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When communicating, parents need to get their children's approval. Talk to your child in a consultative tone, rather than arbitrarily allowing or not allowing it, which will make your child more averse to communicating with you.
I remember that Mr. Sun Jian once shared with us in the Wisdom Parents class: We should try to give the initiative of the conversation to the children, so that the children can take the initiative to cause the topic. When children take the initiative in the conversation, they will be more willing to share with us their feelings, their recent troubles.
Because he felt that the initiative of this conversation was in his hands, and he could end it whenever he wanted.
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First, parents and children communicate patiently.
Second, parents respect their children's opinions.
Third, parents listen patiently to their children's opinions.
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I once consulted a teacher in the Wisdom of Mind Parent class, and the teacher shared with us: Many times children do not really want to go against their parents. He just wants to express his thoughts, wants his parents to approve of his ideas, wants to establish an equal relationship with his parents, lets adults know that he is also an independent individual, and hopes to get emotional resonance with his parents.
Therefore, as parents, we try to avoid denying our children. When communicating, you can give your child more choices, instead of telling your child what not to do, you can suggest what to do. Most people don't like to be denied, so you can give your child more affirmation.
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To communicate with children, be patient, parents must master skills in communicating with children, parents should also respect children's opinions, listen patiently to children's opinions, and must master the trick of communicating with children.
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Support your child's hobbies and hobbies, and communicate with a smile and a calm mind. Don't talk about your child's previous mistakes.
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Parents and children are all about communication, and they must first respect their children's ideas. The second is to try to find some common language with the child first, so that the child does not have too much estrangement from the parents.
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Don't put on an aggressive, trendy posture. You should have a long and calm conversation with your child.
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Communicate more, communicate more.
Hope, thank you!
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Parents need to learn to treat their children equally. When taking the initiative to communicate with your child, squat down and keep eye level with your child, you can avoid giving your child a bad feeling of being condescending, and as a parent, you should also respect your child's feelings. Because in the Wisdom Parents class of Heart and Harmony before, the teacher shared with us:
Most parents are prepared for an unequal exchange before chatting with their children, hoping that through the so-called "communication" the children will meet their various requirements, or the reason why they communicate with their children is because the children have not met their expectations in a certain aspect and have a reprimand or criticism to start the conversation.
This is one of the biggest reasons why communication with children is the biggest problem, and if you really want to communicate effectively with your child, you must first avoid these stereotypes.
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1. Be sure to communicate with your children on an equal footing, and you must not be condescending, or even not always understand that your children have matured and grown up, which may make your children feel that there is no way to communicate and communicate with their parents, or even feel that their parents cannot understand themselves. 2. Be more tolerant and patient, especially when the child already has a sense of independence, be more tolerant of the child's thoughts, and then let the child express himself bravely and have more opportunities to express it. 3. It is also necessary to use skills to communicate and communicate with children to effectively alleviate the problem of poor communication, such as giving children more opportunities to express, and at the same time giving more affirmation to children's opinions and suggestions, encouraging children to have their own ideas, and when children have some very good ideas, we must encourage children to do it bravely, rather than always pouring cold water on children.
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How should parents communicate with their children, many parents complain that they and their children can't communicate at all, and even quarrel after not being able to say a few words. There are even fathers and sons who will fight when they communicate. In fact, the communication barrier between parents and children is a problem for parents in terms of mental health.
Below I will share an article on how parents should communicate with their children, I hope it will help you.
1. Listen attentively to your children's demands
In the process of communicating with your child, you must listen attentively to what your child is saying, and it is best to give appropriate and satisfactory information. Response, which is the premise of effective communication.
2. Pay attention to your child's reaction and attitude
When parents communicate with their children, they are often anxious to express their opinions and instructions, and expect their children to do what they say, and it is best not to have opinions. Therefore, often the child is not listened to carefully, and the child feels that it is difficult to communicate with the parents, and the generation gap will inevitably become deeper and deeper. Therefore, it is important for parents to be patient when talking to their children, not only to listen to their children's explanations, but also to understand their children's wishes.
3. Pay attention to the child's feelings
If the child is wronged outside, or separated from a good friend or beloved pet, the child's delicate little heart will be sad, at this time it is very necessary for the care of parents, parents can communicate with the child with gentle words, so that the child feels that the parents care about the child's feelings.
1. Command, control, threat, warning
Shut up for me, don't speak, and if you don't, I'll lock you up in a dark room.
Go back and finish your unfinished homework now, or you won't want to sleep.
You are not allowed to hang out with your children, and if you don't obey, don't go home.
Hurry up and clean your room, or don't eat.
Don't get up again, have your good fruit to eat, and see how I clean you up.
I warn you that if you cry again, you will be beaten, and you must not cry.
2. Suggest, nag, preach, and give methods
You shouldn't be like that, you should.
You have to listen to the teacher, don't talk back to the teacher.
You have to study hard and be a productive person in the future, otherwise you will have to pick up garbage.
You will certainly have no problem doing what I say.
If you don't listen to the old man, you will suffer in front of you.
It is recommended that you take the initiative to admit your mistakes to the teacher and review yourself.
3. Evaluation, accusation, denial, labeling
You're just a bad boy who doesn't obey.
Doing anything is three points of heat, and it doesn't last long.
I already knew that you wouldn't get a good grade.
It's your fault, and no amount of talk can cover up what you've done.
I don't want to do things clearly, and I lose everything.
This thing is that you are not doing it right, and you still don't admit it.
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Many parents know that when communicating with their children, they need to squat down and talk to their children on a horizontal line, so as to give their children a better environment for natural communication and better understand their children's feelings. 1.Squatting down and communicating with children, Liang Chong always looks at problems from the perspective of adults, and his thinking about problems is naturally different from that of children, and his feelings about many things are also different.
Therefore, when parents and children have conflicts, parents try to squat down and think about problems with their children, and they may be able to find that the children's world is different from ours. 2.Eye ContactIn basic social etiquette, both parties need to look into each other's eyes as a sign of politeness, but parents often forget this when communicating with their children.
Eye contact is very important, and many times the child's inner activities are expressed in the eyes, which is also where parents just ignore it. Parents need to squat down when criticizing their children, because only through the child's expression can you judge whether your criticism is effective for the child and whether the child understands that he is wrong. Sometimes you will find that the child's eyes are actually full of horror, he does not know that he is wrong, and he does not understand why his parents are throwing tantrums.
The natural height of parents is strong in front of their children, and they will unconsciously be condescending when they speak, and when parents squat down, children will feel that their parents are close to them and can better communicate with their parents in eye or other ways3Squatting down to communicate reduces anger Sometimes when you squat down and talk to your child, the older type is still irritable for one second, and the next second you find that you are not so angry. When you squat down, you can feel the child's small world, and find out how weak the child is, everything around him is different from usual, and his mood has changed.
When you squat down at about the same height as your child, your child's worries and fears will be alleviated, so that your child is more likely to tell you the truth from the bottom of his heart, which can promote better communication with each other and cultivate a parent-child relationship. Parents who do not have the ability to have a big temper often treat their children condescendingly, and their children will gradually have a bad temper and be impolite to others in this environment. When parents discover their children's shortcomings, they should first reflect on themselves to see if their own bad problems are transmitted to their children, and then choose whether to criticize their children.
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Children are often very sensitive, and the tone of their parents' communication with them implies an attitude that is just as important as the content of the conversation.
Learn to listen and allow your child to lose his temper.
Learning to listen is the first step in communication. If your child is angry about something, allow him to lose his temper. Parents may wish to sit down first, quietly watch the noisy reputation serve the child, listen attentively, and stop what is at hand, which is equivalent to telling the child:
You are being cared for by us, and we are listening carefully to the feelings or problems that you are talking about.
Respond sincerely and express your parents' true feelings.
Don't make fun of children, children's ideas are different from adults, no matter what children say, don't laugh at them unless they are laughing themselves. When your child is serious about telling you, your contemptuous or disbelieving attitude will only hurt your child, and he will no longer want to talk to you in the future. Humor in conversation is good, but use it carefully to see if your child understands the difference between humor and teasing.
Take the initiative to share with your child, of course, as a parent, you don't need to show your child the worry in your heart, to increase the psychological burden of your child's worry, but sometimes you might as well take the initiative to share your mood, feelings, and views on things with your child, and the child will of course be easier to tell you about his mood, feelings and opinions.
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Maintaining good communication with children is an important part of parenting their children. Here are a few tips for parents to communicate with their children:
Communicate with your child with equality and respect. Parents should respect their children's opinions and feelings and maintain equal communication with their children as they would adults.
Learn what your child thinks and feels. Parents should listen to their children's thoughts and feelings as much as possible, help them solve problems, and support their decision-making.
Establish a good relationship between the letter and the coarse man. Parents should let their children feel trusted and supported, and maintain sincere communication with their children.
Show love and encouragement. Parents should always tell their children about their love and encouragement so that they feel important.
Avoid excessive control and criticism. Parents should avoid overly controlling and criticizing their children, as this may lead to resentment and resistance in their children.
Ask for help. If parents find that they are unable to solve a problem in a rock roll, they can seek help from a professional, such as a psychological counselor, education specialist, etc.
In conclusion, maintaining good communication with children is essential for a healthy and harmonious family relationship. Parents should communicate with their children in an equal, respectful and caring manner, understand their thoughts and feelings, make them feel trusted and supported, avoid excessive control and criticism, and seek help to solve problems.
In fact, parents and children should be friends, communicate and exchange well, and explain any problems face to face. In this way, it is beneficial to the growth of children.
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