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Parents have too much control over their children, either causing their children to be rebellious, and he will think why do I have to obey your arrangements in everything, the more parents force them to give them tasks, the more they don't do it, but it is counterproductive. Either the child obeys the arrangement of his parents in everything, has no opinions, has no ability to think independently, and relies on his parents for everything, resulting in a cowardly personality. Therefore, parents should not be very controlling over their children, but should communicate with their children appropriately to understand their true thoughts.
The impact on the child.
1. Children are timid and withdrawn.
In terms of opinions and behaviors, he does not dare to go beyond the thunder pool outside the jurisdiction of his mother. In the future, in the face of new communication, I don't dare to express myself, and if I have been suppressed for a long time, I am prone to extreme personality. And can't control their emotions.
Suddenly being emotionally irritable, suddenly crying and fussing over trivial things, is bound to be criticized. Because of poor emotional control, it is easy to act aggressively. This is very dangerous, or at least very harmful to one's free development.
2. The child's dependence psychology becomes stronger and has no own opinions.
Because the parents have done everything, and no one cares about their own ideas, and no one respects them. This way you don't have to think and act on your own. When encountering things, they will become more and more unable to deal with them on their own, and they will become less assertive and have no ability to solve problems.
In life, everyone has a desire to dominate themselves and the ability to decide for themselves, and this autonomy makes a person unwilling to accept the control of others.
When parents educate their children, they are more in the position of authority and elders, hoping that their children will act according to their own ideas, and do not respect their children as an equal individual, so children's behavior problems increase. Therefore, reducing parents' attempts to control children's activities will be more conducive to the healthy development of children's behavior.
3. The absence of the role of the father.
Generally, mothers who are too strong not only make children lose themselves easily, but even make the role of father almost absent. But the role of the father is very important for the development of children. Fathers can teach their children to be brave, confident, and optimistic.
Because children imitate by nature, boys love to imitate their fathers, and girls love to imitate their mothers. Therefore, mothers who are too controlling will let their children lack opportunities for exercise from their fathers.
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Parents' desire to control is too strong, which is harmful to the physical and mental health of their children, and it may cause children to have psychological distortions from an early age, not daring to express their true inner thoughts, and not daring to do what they want to do.
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It can be harmful to physical and mental health. Controlling parents, who only focus on the requirements of the parents and ignore the inner needs of the children, will only have a negative impact on the children. First, children are not cared for by their parents, and are prone to low self-esteem and deviations in emotional management.
Second, children are particularly afraid in their hearts and tend to become sensitive and afraid of new things.
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Parents who are too controlling are the ones who do the most and are the most tired for their children, and they are also the ones who are most likely to intrude on their children's autonomy and creativity. Parents impose their own desires on their children, and the children will feel "invaded", and out of the instinct of individual existence, the children will "wrap and seal" the free and autonomous self inside. As a result, the child becomes succumbed to the lack of vitality.
From a psychological point of view, this is a child who has not left a symbiotic relationship with his mother. Mom always treated him like a child. He agreed with his mother's evaluation, succumbed to his mother's control, and has been surviving as a child, with a slight desire to grow up, and all kinds of moral pressures of guilt and accusation followed.
He didn't really grow up, so how do you "mature" in other areas of life? That's it, he cooperated with his mother's control, and couldn't get better (really growing up, separated from his parents). Because of "okay" (separation from parents), my mother is not at ease.
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It is harmful, because to a certain extent, it will cause some psychological burden on children, so that they will not have a good development, and affect their future life.
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1. Too much control makes children lose self-confidence. Excessive demands cause the child to lose a sense of security and increase psychological pressure, at this time the child becomes tired, no criticism can touch him, and he becomes unconfident and inactive. 2. It will make children rebellious.
Too much control can make children want to escape control even more.
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Naturally, it is harmful, which will cause children to have a certain inferiority complex, which is very scary, and is not conducive to their healthy growth.
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If parents are too lenient, it will have a great impact on their children's physical and mental health, which will cause children to rebel and bring pressure to children, and they will grow up in a depressed environment and have a sound personality.
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Yes, it will make the child have no own opinions, and there will be a sense of fear for the parents, which is not conducive to the development of the relationship between the child and the parents, and will make the child and the parents become very strange.
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The physical and mental damage to children is very great. It will leave the children without autonomy and love.
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It can be said that this has a great impact on the child's body and mind, and will make the child grow up to be very cowardly, without his own views and opinions, and will become very timid and without any sense of responsibility.
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Parental control is particularly strong will make children become particularly inferior, dare not express their opinions, will make children have psychological problems, and the relationship with parents will be very poor, sometimes will not communicate with parents, these are the impact of too strong parental control on children, to give children their own space, can not be particularly strong in their desire to control.
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Every parent has their own ideas for educating their children. No matter what kind of parents they are, they want their children to end up being good people. However, in the process of growing up with children, if parents control too much, they can easily play a negative role.
Parents should understand!
Children feel inferior.
Most of these children are influenced by their original parents, or their parents have a strong desire to control themselves, so they will bring that control to their significant other. After marriage, they have a strong desire to control their other half, hoping that the other half will tell them everything they do.
However, some people think that there is a strong sense of space, and they want to have their own private space and not live under the supervision of others, so there is conflict, and the lives of two people become very contradictory. Therefore, one thing that parents must understand is that although children are born with the help of our bodies, they have a soul of their own, they should not live in our place, we should not explore the world in their place.
There is no assertiveness, only obedience.
Too much control on the part of parents can take a toll on a child's self-confidence and create thoughts of "I can't", "I can't" and "I can't". Driven by this notion, children learn to obey, so they don't have the ability to innovate. Parents with a strong desire to control have a hard time raising creative children, but more often than not, they can only obey.
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If the parents' desire to control is too strong in the family, it may cause a sense of tension in the child's heart, and it will cause the child to have a rebellious psychology.
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The impact is very bad, and it will also make the child's character particularly cowardly, and he will not dare to express his own opinions when he encounters anything, and he will also be very sensitive, insecure, and especially like to rely on others.
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But the child is also very timid, and dare not easily try and touch some other things, slowly the child will appear a kind of autism, and the child's friends will also be reduced.
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It will make the child become very sensitive and become very inferior, which will make the child particularly uncomfortable.
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If the parents' desire to control is too strong, it will cause a lot of pressure on the child, and the child will become very irritable and unwilling to communicate with the parents, which will widen the distance between the parents and the child.
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It will make the child too cowardly, timid, unassertive, and submissive. I don't dare to give my opinion on some things, I just follow them. Be careful in everything you do, for fear of being scolded.
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If parents are too controlling, they will make their children have no opinions, have low self-esteem, and will do things submissively, and they will look at other people's faces when they grow up.
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It will have an impact on the child's personality, will make the child have no opinions, rely on his parents for everything, will make the child have no self-confidence, and his personality will become very introverted.
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If the parents' desire to control is too strong, it will put a lot of pressure on the child, and it will also make the child feel inferior from the heart and give birth to a rebellious mentality.
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1. Lack of happiness when children grow up: There is a certain connection between parents' excessive control behavior and children's mental health problems when they grow up, which may have a certain adverse impact on children's happiness, and children who are overly controlled by parents are also unhappy in their hearts.
2. Lead to poor self-reliance: children's independence needs to be cultivated from an early age, and parents should not worry too much about their children's safety when they first learn to do their own things. On the basis of ensuring the safety of the child, try to let the child handle it by himself.
On the one hand, it can stimulate children's curiosity, and on the other hand, it can also cultivate children's autonomy. If parents intervene in their children, they will develop a sense of dependence. In the future, children do not find ways to solve problems on their own, but rely on the help of others.
Once this habit is formed, the child will gradually become weak and incompetent. Therefore, when children are young, parents should not do too much for them. Let your child be clear about what he should do on his own and what he needs help.
3. Lack of assertiveness in children: If children encounter parents with a strong desire to control from an early age, children will repeatedly feel that their own ideas conflict with their parents' ideas in the process of growing up. When you grow up, you are easily influenced by others, care too much about the evaluation of others, and become a person who can't make up your mind.
For example, some people are extremely unconfident when they grow up, and they must consult their parents before making any decisions, including work, love, marriage, childbirth, and buying a house.
When children choose friends, parents should not use their own principles to interfere, which will only make children lose themselves. Otherwise, the strong desire of parents to control will only make the child gradually lose himself and lose his judgment. All parents can do is correct guidance and full respect for their children, so as to cultivate children's independent thinking.
the ability to judge right and wrong. In the process of the child's gradual establishment of the three views, reasonable suggestions are put forward but not imposed on the child.
In short, parents who are very controlling may bring a series of adverse effects to their children. Children tend to be unassertive, timid, not responsible, not very gregarious, dependent, lack the ability to think independently, and have a sunny personality.
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Many parents control everything about their children in the name of love, worrying that their children's life trajectory is a little bit off, and they dominate their children's lives with their own thinking, which is not good, and controlling parents still have a lot of influence on their children.
For example, parents' strong desire to control will cause children to be prone to anxiety, withdrawal and other problems, lack of independent thinking ability, will only listen to the opinions of others, do not know how to express their own emotions and ideas, and easily develop into obedient, cowardly, lack of self-confidence, loneliness, depression, low self-esteem, submissive, lack of independent ability.
In terms of interpersonal relationships, such children will always be in the position of being led, because they have a weak sense of competition, do not think independently and do things independently, and are prone to insecurity and excessive obedience. At the same time, some children are more and more rebellious under the high pressure of their parents, lack of judgment, and rebel against their parents.
These children have been under the control of their parents for a long time, and they will have an inexplicable sense of powerlessness and do not know what they can do. Even if there is a good development in the future, there will be a life that my parents chose for me, not the life I wanted, which is actually a big failure in education.
Many parents put a lot of love into their children and have high expectations, but they will unconsciously fall into a state of controlling their children. Children not only do not feel the love of their parents, but they will feel very painful and depressed.
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Controlling parents may have a series of adverse effects on their children. Children are often unassertive, timid, not responsible, not very gregarious, dependent, and lack the ability to think independently. The personality is not sunny enough, positive and optimistic, etc.
This is not absolute, but environmental factors will have an impact on children to some extent.
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The word desire to control is a bit inappropriate to some extent, and the expression is not perfect, it is not a strong desire to control, but it just means that parents want their children to want to become a legal citizen, or a sensible and polite citizen, or some parents are a little uneasy about their children, and they are a little too strict. It will create a feeling of fear of parents and a feeling of timidity in children.
1: In fact, no matter whether the desire to control is strong, or the parents have a poor desire to control, in the final analysis, the purpose of parents to control their children is for the good of their children, parents hope to use their own life experience to guide their children, so that children can avoid detours and be happy! >>>More
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You can communicate rationally with your parents, and it is best to solve problems, because the relationship with your parents after all you can't change anything, this is innate, they are elders, you are juniors, you just say what problems I have to discuss with them, if you don't have the independent economic ability now, then you have to listen to them for many problems, if you are now financially independent, and you don't need much help from them, then you can naturally do things that you think are reasonable, Because you don't need their support, you can do it yourself.
Generally speaking, you can't interfere, but as a child, you should give due consideration to your parents' opinions.