Call for jokes, first of all, to be funny, and then not too few words

It's not funny to find in the jokes, and it's not suitable for funny.

My classmates asked me if I knew that Sophie was 410mm for long nights.

I asked what was wrong.

She said it changed her worldview.

I wonder how powerful this sanitary napkin is.

She replied, "Because I found that I was only as tall as four sanitary napkins, I felt so small." ”.

Actually, when you think about it, it makes a lot of sense. I can't get four sanitary napkins, how can I be embarrassed.

One day my dad went to the electronic city to buy a mobile phone The boss said that this mobile phone was a rice version of 358 yuan Dad wanted rice It turned out that this mobile phone could be used to make rice to eat Dad said I bought it Dad said that my wife could eat this mobile phone My wife immediately baked the mobile phone when she heard it Just put it in the pot and my mother turned gray Dad was beaten by my mother with a long tail On the second day, my mother said why don't you go to work Dad said I have a long tail and I want to cut off my tail.

The person who cut the tail said that he could not cut it off.

Q: What kind of car do I want to buy if I have 1 million?

Answer: Buy 30 QQ cars, form a fleet, drive into an S type for a while, and drive a B type for a while.

Suddenly, I received a **, and the other party said: "Hello, I just rushed to your account with a hundred phone bills, can you call me back?" "Okay.

Thank you so much, you are such a nice person. After hanging up**, I immediately called over and said, "Okay, I'll call you, I'll hang up if it's okay, 88."

The principal of a third-rate college passed by the back door of the school one day and suddenly heard a sentence: "I want to take the Oxford exam!" The principal was immediately moved, he didn't expect that there were such aspiring young people in their school, and he decided to get to know him well, and at this time he heard another sentence:

Two more kebabs, boss. "Headmaster:"...

To judge whether the girl is from the south or the north, the history teacher gave a good answer: about"You are wrong", Northern Girls:"You are talking nonsense! "Southern schoolgirl": You're talking nonsense"The bold and graceful...

Continue to send a car driver to park on the side of the road and want to take a good rest.

As he lay down in his chair, someone asked the time, and he looked at his watch and said, "It's almost 8 o'clock." ”

As soon as he fell asleep, there was a knock on the window again: "Sir, do you know the time?" ”

He had to look at his watch again and tell him, "It's half past eight." ”

There were so many people knocking on the window that he couldn't sleep well at all, so he wrote a small note and pasted it on the window: "I don't know the time!" ”

Too sleepy, the driver lay down again.

But a few minutes later, a passer-by knocked on the window again: "Hey, sir, it's a quarter past 9!" ”

In recent decades, many scientists have been asking: How did dinosaurs go extinct? In the e-era, there is finally an answer: dinosaurs are scared to death by frogs!

Brothers, look at it.

Listen to my confession.

Live in this day and age.

Men are also to stand up.

MM is too rich these days.

We just had enough to go grocery shopping.

Is it really sad.

But don't blame anyone.

Ten mm (even a man).

Seven (silly).

Eight Jiao (Stay).

Nine Blame (Bad).

There is one left for you to love (and one left to love you).

Brothers stand up (mm to self-love).

No matter how hard and tired it is.

Coax her (I coax you well).

You can't (don't) fail to fall in love.

Loving a neighbor is like paying a debt.

It doesn't matter if you're handsome or not.

Don't mess with MM and throw you down.

The horse has to be filmed as well.

You can suffer any grievance.

I'm afraid of a green hat belt.

Don't pick wildflowers when you see them.

Even if it's for the next generation.

When I was in high school, I had to hold back if I could run and dance, and I had to endure it if I could speak and sing. Everyone is the same steamed bun and looks the same. In college, what you play is quality, you can be independent if you have a specialty, although it is all buns recently, but it depends on which bun has more pleats, which bun looks like a hamburger, and fights for personality.

So, I understand, even if I am short of everything, I still have to have a specialty at the critical moment.

One day, three demons came to God and said to God, "God, let us enter the immortal class." God said, "Tell each of you how you died." ”

The first ghost said, "I was cleaning the windows on the twelfth floor, and I accidentally fell down and grabbed the balcony on the second floor, but I don't know who brought the refrigerator down, and I was crushed to death." ”

The second ghost said: "I was talking to a female colleague at her house, and suddenly her husband came back, and she told me that her husband had a bad temper, and I immediately hid in the refrigerator, but I don't know how he found me, and threw me down with the refrigerator, and I was thrown to death." ”

The third ghost said, "When I came home from work, I saw my wife talking to a man at home, and I saw a hand on the balcony, and I picked up the refrigerator and went down, and I was." ”

God doesn't know what to do.

1. One day, the father tells his son a story.

Dad: "In the Spring and Autumn Period....”

Son: "Tell me if it's spring or autumn?" ”

Dad: "There is a prince....”

Son: "Is it a pig or a monkey?" ”

Dad: "....2. My son is three and a half years old and has recently fallen in love with role-playing games.

The son said, "Dad, I'm a dumpling, you can eat me!" ”

So my husband was very involved in arching his son's belly. The sound in his mouth made the child giggle.

The son smiled and asked, "Dad, am I delicious?" ”

My husband said, "It's delicious! It's much better than the dumplings made by my mother. Oops, baby, what kind of dumplings are you? ”

The son who wanted to poop said very seriously: "Dad, I'm-stuffed!" ”

3. A man's son was bitten by a mosquito, and he gave his son wind oil essence and said to his son: "Wind oil essence contains a kind of thing, and mosquitoes are afraid when they smell it, so they won't come to bite you." ”

The son said, "What if it comes back pinching its nose? ”

4. Today, a friend sent me a copy of her 8-month-old daughter's **, **The little baby is holding a half-eaten banana in her hand, pouting and crying.

I was surprised and asked my friend, "Does she eat bananas?"

I asked, "Then why is she crying so sadly"?

There was a blind man, a deaf man and a crooked neck to go to the play, and when he came back, the blind man said, "I have to sing very well today, but I can't move." The deaf man said

I did a good job today, but I didn't hear a word of what I was singing. Crooked his neck and said: "You two are not right, in fact, today's play is singing well, and the movements are okay, but the stage is crooked."

In the spring, a pair of sisters-in-law went to pick cabbage, and the sister-in-law was about to go out with a basket, and the sister joked: "Sister-in-law carries the basket and thinks about Han." In the afternoon, the sun was shining, and my sister put her hand on her forehead to watch the sun, and my sister-in-law took the opportunity to retaliate and said:

My sister is afraid of the sun and the shade. Someone linked these two sentences together, and it became a couplet:

Sister-in-law Tilan thinks about Han, and her sister is afraid of the sun.

A pair of lovers had a quarrel over a discussion issue, the man was a little excited and raised his voice to argue loudly, and the girl shouted angrily: What are you doing?! What is fierce?! The man said aggrievedly: I'm not fierce. After that, I thought about it and admitted: No, I have "breasts".

One day, Xiao Ming's father said, if you score 100 points in the final exam, I will buy you a bicycle for 200 yuan. If it's a double hundred, I'll buy you a bicycle for 400 yuan. And so on!

Dad, do you know how to buy a bicycle for 100 yuan? Xiao Ming's father said, you!

Be happy. Remember to hurt her and care about her.