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The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not related by blood, there is a large generation gap, and there is a relationship between two women who are very important to each other, it is difficult to get along, the key is whether they can treat each other sincerely, whether they can be less calculating and self-conscious, and more understanding and tolerant!! For the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, I first want to say: why should women be embarrassed by women!!
For your mother-in-law, you have been a daughter-in-law for many years, why can't you understand your daughter-in-law? For your daughter-in-law, you have just started to boil, and one day you will also become a mother-in-law, so why fight so hard?!! The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law may be a relatively bad relationship at present, mainly because the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have a large difference in thinking, the mother-in-law manages too much, the daughter-in-law is too self-conscious, does not give in to each other, and the original prejudices, etc., I think that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can be understood from the following aspects:
First of all, your in-laws are elders, and they are equivalent to your own parents, so you should respect your in-laws, and at the same time you should be humble, after all, your in-laws and your thinking are quite different, so it is normal to have some different opinions, as a junior, you should learn to take a step back; Secondly, you have to know that you are marrying into this family, which is like integrating into a new environment, you have to take the initiative to adapt to the environment, and you can't let the original environment adapt to you. Because as a daughter-in-law living in her mother's house for more than 20 years, the living habits and the way she has been educated, etc., are definitely different from the habits formed by her in-law's family for decades, so you must learn to seek common ground while reserving differences, and gradually integrate into the family, instead of encountering a little-for-tat quarrel with yourself, which can only quarrel your happiness and family harmony. Third, if there is a problem, we must figure out the essence of the problem, if it is wrong, we should take the initiative to admit the mistake, if it is the mother-in-law is wrong, do not ignore the unforgiving, after all, the people born in their era are very different from modern young people in terms of thinking and way of thinking, but one thing is certain, they also hope that the younger generation is good, although their words or ways are somewhat inappropriate, but we do not need to be judged; Finally, when it comes to this kind of situation, I think you should let your husband communicate with your mother-in-law, your husband is your mother-in-law's son, no matter what your husband says and does, your mother-in-law can tolerate and understand, but if you come forward, it is easy to cause the mother-in-law's unhappiness, because she will think that my son did not say me, you want to say it for life, so as a daughter-in-law, you must talk about ways and means, as a daughter-in-law, don't be too strong, care about your mother-in-law's affairs, try your best to do it, if you encounter a problem, try to let your husband come forward to communicate, This is the art of singing a red face and a white face!
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When your mom and your daughter-in-law fall into the water at the same time, which one will you save first? "Although it is an old-fashioned stalk, it has become a problem for the ages. I don't know how many heroes and heroes have been stumped.
The tension in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can be seen from this.
As the saying goes: "Every family has a scripture that is difficult to read, and the most difficult thing to read is the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law scripture." ”
Xiaohui's mother-in-law has been a primary school teacher all her life, and her loud voice has transitioned from a professional habit to a living habit, and Xiaohui's tutor has always paid attention to speaking softly. Xiaohui has always been disgusted by her mother-in-law's loud voice.
Last weekend, Xiaohui took her mother-in-law to the open-air hot spring, and everyone gathered around a hot spring pool.
Others chatted softly, only the mother-in-law spoke in a loud voice, Xiaohui saw this and signaled her mother-in-law a few times with her eyes, but her mother-in-law did not understand what Xiaohui meant.
The mother-in-law's loud voice caused frequent sideways glances from the people next to her, which made Xiaohui extremely embarrassed.
In the end, Xiaohui reminded her mother-in-law to speak in a small tone, and her mother-in-law was embarrassed at the time, her voice was lowered, and her mood was also low, so she went home alone that night. Since then, there has been a gap between her mother-in-law and Xiaohui.
The collision between the original family can not only cause conflicts between husband and wife, but also lead to tension between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law due to different living habits.
Before pregnancy, most of the conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law were due to different living habits between each other.
But after giving birth, the difference in parenting concepts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has become the main reason for the tension between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
Nowadays, taking care of children has become the work of the older generation, and the mother-in-law of the "next generation" always likes to tell her daughter-in-law how to raise children as a passer-by.
As a woman in the new era, the daughter-in-law does not agree with the traditional concept of mother-in-law, and consulting experts and reading parenting books have become the main ways for daughters-in-law to obtain educational concepts.
When the new concept of parenting conflicts with the traditional view of parenting, it will lead to tension between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and in serious cases, it will escalate into a conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law love their children the same, but different parenting styles will also cause conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
Third, the position of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is different.
In an era of material scarcity, it is a problem for people to wrap their stomachs, let alone pursue any spiritual pursuits. At that time, there were few conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, unlike now, where there are various reasons for mother-in-law and daughter-in-law conflicts.
Nowadays, the times are different, and not only young people are pursuing"Ego"Older people now also pay attention to spiritual freedom and live their own lives.
Xiaojing's mother-in-law can be regarded as a comparison"Funky"of the elderly, singing and dancing pervade the entire life of old age.
Last weekend, Xiao Jing was going to attend an educational lecture on how to communicate with children, and wanted her mother-in-law to help take care of the children.
And the mother-in-law happened to make an appointment with her companion to dance together, knowing that it was"Education"On the premise of the lecture, the mother-in-law, who hesitated repeatedly, still refused to help take care of the children.
In Xiao Jing's opinion,"Education"The lecture involves the education of children, which is related to the future of the family, and is far more important than the dancing of the mother-in-law.
The mother-in-law chose to dance instead of taking her grandson, which made it emotionally difficult for Xiao Jing to accept, and Xiao Jing's mother-in-law believed that the education of her grandson was important, but she had worked hard all her life, and she should enjoy life to the fullest when she was old.
The mother-in-law said that the mother-in-law was reasonable, and the daughter-in-law said that the daughter-in-law was reasonable. Different positions are often also the cause of tension between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
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The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law and the relationship between husband and wife, these are all things that need to be solved through communication, and communication requires ways and means, such as for the specific contradictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, you need to communicate with specific things, and only express your inner feelings and specific things when communicating without blaming them, so that the other party can listen to them to better solve the problem, and husband and wife also need to communicate more. People's hearts are exchanged for people's hearts, and eight taels are exchanged for half a catty. You should understand this.
Do more self-criticism and find your own shortcomings, after all, you are an old man, and the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not good, and your husband is very sad. Elevate your own pattern. Care.
As a family, we need to care for each other. As a daughter-in-law, no matter how your mother-in-law is, if you care about her, she will remember you well.
Strive to improve yourself, don't worry about trivial family matters, don't care about gains and losses, don't care about whether you suffer losses, no one fights, and a farce of one person naturally can't make a fuss. The conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law still needs to be resolved by both parties.
Communicate honestly, communicate, say the crux of the problem, and don't be emotional when communicating, otherwise it will turn into a quarrel. As long as both parties are reasonable people, the conflict will naturally dissolve.
This move also avoids the long-term accumulation of contradictions and causes greater damage to family relationships.
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The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has been a difficult problem since ancient times, and almost all mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationships are extremely tense.
In family life, the guidance of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a process that many people need to learn and run-in. If you want the family to be happy and stable, the contradictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law should be effectively resolved, otherwise in the long-term process of getting along, there will only be more sparks, which will lead to the disintegration of the whole family, and the stability of the family is related to everyone's future and destiny. At the same time, the stability of the family also requires the joint efforts of every member of the family, no one can be immune to himself, and no one can win in such a war without gunpowder.
Therefore, good results can only be achieved if they work together with each other.
In fact, the main reason for the tension between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law lies in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the intermediary of contact is the role of the son and the husband, and the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law seem to be in a competitive and antagonistic relationship, especially for many mothers-in-law with a bad mentality, the existence of the daughter-in-law takes away the attention of their daughter-in-law and son, they may have a strong sense of possessiveness, and hope that the son will always be their intimate little jacket. When the son is good to the daughter-in-law, they will be jealous and hateful, so they are more critical of the daughter-in-law, and even some mothers-in-law think that their son is perfect, impeccable, and no one is worthy, so they are always beautiful and cold when facing the daughter-in-law, which causes the asymmetry in the whole family relationship. Of course, there are also daughters-in-law who do not have the most basic respect when facing their mother-in-law, thinking that their mother-in-law is a burden and unwilling to give their sincerity, which leads to more and more tension between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law...
In fact, these problems can be avoided, as long as you can communicate and communicate with each other openly, be respectful, polite, reasonable, and don't care too much about ordinary trivial things. When facing the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the husband can play a decisive role, pacify both sides, and do not be in the middle and mud, so that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can be effectively resolved and a better family state can be created.
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Because after all, the mother-in-law is not a mother and daughter-in-law is not a daughter, and the relationship between the two parties cannot be so good at all, plus both parties have too much hope for each other, but they can't do it at all, so all the relationship between husband and wife is very tense, and it can be avoided, only if both parties care about each other more, understand each other, help each other and trust each other, and interfere less in each other's lives.
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The reason why the relationship between husband and wife is strained is that the two of them do not be effective, understand communication, respect each other, and do not know how to consider problems from each other's point of view; It is completely avoidable, and in daily life, we must do both sides, respect, understand and trust each other, and we can also create relevant surprises for each other, so as to influence each other.
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Because the lifestyle and living habits of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are different, they are not able to achieve a good relationship through short-term running-in; I think this situation can be completely avoided, as long as you learn to empathize.
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The reason why the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can cause tension is that the two parties cannot understand effectively, and the two people do not communicate accordingly and do not consider the problem from the other person's point of view.
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Because mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are not related by blood, and often live together, it is easy to have problems and inconsistent views, so it will cause a tense relationship.
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Most of them are caused by the husband, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is established because of the husband, and the tension between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is also because of the husband. The husband is a bridge between two women, both women love the same man, but the way of love is different, and women's love is often more selfish, so it will cause a lot of conflicts. Except for some temperaments and personalities that are really incompatible, the husband can completely mediate and handle the relationship between his mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
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When it comes to the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it may be one of the problems in the world. It is also one of the most difficult relationships between people.
Other words. Most mother-in-law relationships. are prone to contradictions.
When there is a conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. The party with the appropriate weakness. Some people say it's a mother-in-law.
It is always said that the son married his daughter-in-law and forgot his mother. Some people say it's a daughter-in-law. She is the only outsider in a large family.
So it is the appropriate force thin one. In fact, for this matter, the public said that the public was reasonable, and the mother said that the mother was reasonable. Each has its own reasons.
Let's start with the mother-in-law's point of view. The mother-in-law thinks that her daughter-in-law is always out of place with her. That's all my son's habitual fault.
The arrival of the daughter-in-law. snatched his son away. The son's heart is getting farther and farther away from him.
So when I have a conflict with my daughter-in-law. Sons are often hidden on the side of their daughters-in-law. At this time, my mother was the saddest.
It is also the most appropriate party with weak strength.
Let's put ourselves in the daughter-in-law's shoes. I and my mother-in-law are prone to conflicts. The mother-in-law is too subjective.
My mother-in-law is in charge of too much. Big enough to have a baby. As small as eating, drinking, and Lazar, you have to take care of everything in terms of life and rest.
Even the mother-in-law always wants to treat herself like his son. As long as he doesn't follow his heart, the mother-in-law will not be happy. In such a situation, mother-in-law.
The daughter-in-law will grow up, and she will be very lonely. A large family. Except for her.
It's an outsider. The others are all family. So in such a situation, the daughter-in-law will feel.
I am the party with appropriate weakness.
After a long time, there will be more and more contradictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. In fact, for the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Personally, I think.
The party with weak appropriate strength is actually a mother-in-law. Most of the sons are married. are all afraid of their wives, and they are all the kind of wives who are strict.
So at a critical time, he always wronged his mother in front of his daughter-in-law. And the father-in-law of the family thinks. After all, the daughter-in-law is a junior, so the old man should be more responsible for the junior.
Don't always worry about the juniors. So obviously. Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are contradictory, and the weak party is actually the mother-in-law.
In fact, this is the status quo in most real life. As a mother, she worked hard to bring up her son. Get married and have children.
In the end, she ended up with the title of a wicked mother-in-law. Therefore, once there is a conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. The mother-in-law is the one who is appropriately weak.
So. It's not easy to be a mother, and it's even more difficult to be a mother-in-law, maybe only your own daughter-in-law will become a mother-in-law in the future. will understand the mother-in-law's mood at this time.
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Because children abroad will leave their parents after the age of 18 and live independently on their own. After getting married, they will not live with their parents. So there is very little mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship.
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