Who told me 5 homophonic jokes 5

One day, I went to a restaurant with a foreign friend to eat dumplings.

Nice service lady came to ask. My friends always don't miss any opportunity to practice Chinese, rushing to say, how much does it cost to "sleep"?

The young lady was embarrassed and very angry, and I hurriedly explained that he was asking how much the dumplings were.

[Popular copywriting].1. I drove past a small mud pool, and the splashing water in the small mud pool was so loud, it turned out to be "good mud".

2. Do you know how much a star weighs? Eight grams, because the star god quietly bucks.

4. I am a little sheep, I sheared today, and I lost my cotton.

5. Before he died, he said to his son: "Move mountains, move mountains", and his son said: "Bright and shiny".

6. Want Want snow cakes will turn into Want Want senbei when they feel hot.

7. The puff was flattened, and my mother said that I couldn't eat it, and I asked why, because it was a flat puff.

8. I ate a lot of peanuts, the more I ate, the happier I became, I checked, it turned out that it was a good thing to peanuts.

When I was a year old, I grabbed a cicada, I thought I caught the whole summer digging and cracking, who knew that the cicada said, I don't love to pull the cicada, just like it at all.

10. Be sure to eat supper before going to bed, so that you don't have hungry dreams.

Hello dear, I'm honored to answer for you! The 15 homophonic jokes are as follows:1

Why do pigs go to the sky? Because they have "wings" (pig's trotters). 2.

Why can't ducks play mahjong? Because they only "quack". 3.

Why do dogs climb trees? Because they have "bark" (dog skin). 4.

Why do cats drive? Because they have a "clear tail" (cat tail). 5.

Why do chickens swim? Because they have "hydrofoils" (chicken wings). 6.

Why don't any rabbits dance? Because they have the "footsteps" (rabbit steps) of the reeds. 7.

Why do bears sing? Because they have a "throat" (bear's paw). 8.

Why do whales skate? Because they have "ice whales" (whales). 9.

Why do ants play basketball? Because they have "ball skills" (ant skills). 10.

Why do butterflies swim? Because they have "hydrofoils" (butterfly wings). 11.

Why do bees ski? Because they have "snow bees" (bees). 12.

Why do snakes sing? Because they have a "throat" (snakeskin). 13.

Why do deer jump high? Because they have "leg power" (deer power). 14.

Why do sharks dance? Because they have "shark steps" (sand steps). 15.

Why do geese skateboard? Because they have "plate wings" (goose wings). The above is mine, I hope it will be helpful to you, if mine is helpful to you, please give me a thumbs up<>

Have a great day!

[Popular copywriting].

1. One day the elephant was eating ice cream, eating a lot, the more he ate, the more disgusting he became, the little mouse said that he was tired of it, and he was tired of destroying it, did you hear Yu guess? Missed you.

2. I accidentally stepped on an ant, and the little ant said aggrievedly, that's the queen ant, woo woo, we don't have the queen ant.

3. The doctor prescribed me some pills, and I accidentally knocked over the bottle, and the pills crackled and rolled out.

5. Don't even pay attention to me, what are you doing, barbershop?

6, even I don't kiss, what are you kissing? Tsingtao beer?

7. There is a group of ducklings looking at the moon, but the moon is always not round, and one of the ducklings whispered: "Not round, not round, do you hear?" I don't forgive.

8. Guoba and Mud are good friends, one day Mud went to Guoba's house to play, and Guoba asked, "Who are you?" Who are you? Mud said, "I am mud, I am mud, do you hear?" ”

9. When I was fourteen years old, I caught a cicada, and I thought I had caught it all summer, but I didn't expect the cicada to say: "I don't like it at all?" ”

10, even I don't coax, what are you coaxing, Hong Shixian?

The ears are here.

The newly appointed magistrate is a native of Shandong, and because he wants to hang up his son, he said to his master:"You can buy me two bamboo poles. "

The master put the Shandong accent"Bamboo poles"Listen to it"Pork liver", hurriedly agreed, hurriedly ran to the butcher shop, and said to the shopkeeper:"The new county master wants to buy two pork livers, you are an understanding person, you should know it in your heart! "

The shopkeeper was a clever man, and immediately cut two pork livers and presented another pair of pig ears.

After leaving the butcher's shop, the master thought to himself:"The old man told me to buy pork liver, and of course this pig ear is mine......"So he wrapped the hunting ears and stuffed them in his pockets. Back to the county office, to the county magistrate:"Back to the master, the pork liver has been bought! "

Seeing that the master bought back the pork liver, the magistrate said angrily"Your ears are gone! "When the master heard this, his face turned pale with fright, and he hurriedly replied:"Ear ......Ears ............ hereIn my ......In my pocket! "

Yes"machine"Rideable.

There was a salesman who went on a business trip to Guangzhou, and after arriving in Beijing, because he wanted to go by plane, he sent a telegram to the manager because he was afraid that the manager would not agree to the reimbursement:"There is an opportunity to multiply, multiply it or not"The manager received the telegram and thought it was a deal"machine"It's arrived, and I'll call you back immediately:"Take it as you can. "

When the salesman came back from a business trip to reimburse the travel expenses, the manager did not agree to reimburse the airline ticket because of the stipulation that the plane would not be reimbursed due to the lack of rank. The salesman took out the manager and called back, and the manager was dumbfounded.

Meetings in the villages. A township meeting, due to the homonym, the village chief said:"Rabbits, dried shrimps, don't have melons, pickles are too expensive. "(Comrades, villagers, do not speak, now the meeting is open.)

The moderator said:"Pickles please sausage pulp melon. "(Now I give the floor to the village chief.)

See the chicken. Once upon a time, there was a landlord who loved to eat chickens, and the tenant rented his field, but he had to give him a chicken first. There was a tenant named Zhang San, who went to pay rent to the landlord at the end of the year and tenant the land for the second year. When he went, he put a chicken in a bag, and after paying the rent, he told the landlord about the second year's tenant land, and when the landlord saw that he was empty-handed, he looked to the sky and said, "

There are no three kinds of fields in this field. Zhang San understood the meaning of this sentence and immediately took the chicken out of the bag. When the landlord saw the chicken, he immediately changed his words and said:

Who will not give Zhang San to? Zhang San said, "Your words become so fast!"

The landlord replied: "The sentence just now is 'nonsense (chicken) talk', and at this moment this sentence is 'made when the opportunity (chicken) is made'." ”

The principal was furious. At the school council meeting at the end of the semester, the principal was furious at the inefficiency of personnel administration. He said:"ignorance in charge of the director's business; Unconscious personnel in charge of personnel management; As an officer, he is not an officer! "

The coach said: The first class kills chickens, the second class steals eggs, and I will cook porridge for you. (One squad shoots, the second throws bombs, I'll show you how.) ）

The soldier asks the company commander for leave to go home. The company commander said: Step (no) line. The next day the soldier went home anyway. Three days later, the soldier returned to the company, and the company commander asked him: Why did you go home without permission? The soldier said, "Didn't you tell me to walk home?"

A county magistrate with a strong accent came to the village to make a report: rabbits, shrimps, pig tails! Don't pickle melon, pickles are too expensive!

Translation: Comrades, villagers, pay attention! Don't speak, let's have a meeting!

After the county magistrate finished speaking, the host said: Pickles, please sausage and pickles! ( Translation: