Expect too much from yourself 20 and expect too much from yourself

Do more things you can do, cultivate confidence, have the courage to try, don't believe those words that can completely reverse a person from adversity by saying a few words, time, only time can change everything, of course, you still have to persevere, do more and talk more, and you will naturally be able to slowly alleviate it!! That's exactly what I'm doing now.

Expecting too much from yourself is not a good thing, and it may make you doubt yourself and think that you are a useless person when you can't achieve your goals. Instead of this, it is better to set yourself a more appropriate goal, so that you can achieve it through hard work, which can make you more and more confident. For example, when studying, children always aim for 100 points or the first place in the class, which may be achieved in the first grade, but there is no way to achieve it in the third grade, which will make the child fall into sadness, or it may become uninterested in learning.

There is potential for people to slow down, but the potential is not inexhaustible, and everyone's ability to bear pressure is different, and some people have special ability to resist pressure.

It's getting better and better under pressure, and it's still very strong. And some people's ability to bear pressure is very weak, and when the pressure comes, they will be overwhelmed, they may die in silence, or they may start to explode, overthrow everything, let themselves be free, and will no longer be bound. Everyone has to have a clear self-knowledge of themselves, for example, if you can get 95 points on the exam, then you can make 100 points as a goal, and now this goal can make you very motivated.

But if you can only score 80 points each time, and you do it again and again, it means that you are more careless, you can aim for 90 points, and don't always try to get a perfect score. Wait until you reach 90 points and then aim for 100 points, so that a little improvement can be effective.

Every year there are people who are depressed.

And giving up life, these people are not unsmart or not hardworking, maybe because they are too confident and feel that they can achieve a lot of dreams, but in the end they are empty. It may also be too conceited, and then look down on some small people, but they are stumbling up by these people and miss the goal. A strong person may be able to stand up, but a weaker person may collapse.

Expectations. Similar to the goal, I hope parents can understand this, and I hope that adults can learn to accept themselves and not stretch themselves too hard.

People need to relax properly, for example, when you meet a certain expectation, you can go out for a walk and see the life of the public.

I think it's a good thing, if the expectations are too high, you will keep working hard, strive towards the goal, and never stop, but finally be able to grab the fruits of success, of course, too high expectations may also make yourself tired, and be hit by the blow, but the joy after success proves that it is worth it!

Of course, it's not a good thing, if it's too high, it will make you unable to achieve it, but after Han Xing, he was very disappointed in his self-emptiness and blindness, and even lost hope in life. It is still necessary to set certain expectations according to your own ability.

No. You may not be able to achieve the desired results, you may lose confidence in yourself, and there may be a lot of variables.

Expecting too much from yourself is not actually a good thing? Because the expectations are too high, the disappointment will be greater, so when you set your own goals for self-sales, you must be within your ability.

We often complain to ourselves about why we are not as good as others. Why can't we live like everyone else?

We will always want to be superhuman and can meet all our needs. But in reality we can't.

When we don't have a job, we think about how we can get a job every day;

When we get a job, we think about how to turn it into a regular job;

When we became regular, we thought about how we could get a promotion and a raise;

When we were promoted, we thought about how we could improve our performance.

We will always expect too much of ourselves and expect too much from ourselves in our lives.

A sentence in the text says it well: no matter how much wealth we have, as long as we pursue something that we can't get, we can't talk about being rich; If we are content with what we have now, no matter how scarce we actually have what we have, we are rich.

We will pursue many things in our lives that we cannot get ourselves. And then put yourself in trouble. If the mental ability is not strong enough, it may be irritable, irritable, and restless.

We will never be satisfied with the status quo, and we will always have dreams that have not yet been achieved.

The Anxiety of Identity

I'm disappointed in myself.

When I was a child, I fantasized about being good, studying my own, getting admitted to a good university, and choosing my favorite major ....... But until now, my grades are poor, I have chosen a major I don't like, I don't know what I'm doing every day, and sometimes I want to slap myself and see myself.

Now I really think differently than I thought when I was a child, and I'm disappointed in myself.

But life still has to work hard.

As children, we imagined our future selves countless times, imagining glorious prospects. However, when we look back, do we feel that we have let down our childhood selves?

In the journey of life, we continue to grow and gradually form ourselves at different stages. In this process, we should learn to respect our past selves and not need to look at the present with past thinking. You also need to learn to respect who you are now and appreciate every stage of your growth.

In those years, we had dreams, and Liang Di was full of curiosity and enthusiasm. As children, we often fantasize about what the future will look like and aspire to achieve something. However, as the years go by, we gradually realize the heaviness of reality, and we also leave joys, sorrows and sorrows on the road of growth.

Standing at the crossroads of life, we should understand that each stage of our self has its own unique values and experiences. We need to learn to cherish these experiences and face our past, present, and future selves with a tolerant and respectful heart. Only in this way can we know ourselves better.

Let's move forward bravely with our childhood selves and pursue our dreams with determination. We have to tell ourselves: despite all the twists and turns in life, we never give up and we keep trying.

We would like to thank our childhood selves for giving us the courage and strength to go further and further on the road ahead.

Life will not be smooth sailing, but we must learn to learn from setbacks and continue to grow. Let's embrace our past selves and our present selves, and let each other work together to face the challenges of the future. When we learn to respect and appreciate our own growth, we can truly feel the beauty of life.

Looking back, we will find that the former dreamer still shines in our hearts. We should cherish the original intention in our hearts and let it become the driving force for us to move forward.

Looking forward to the future, we must have firm faith and perseverance to move forward bravely. Let us use our childhood dreams to illuminate the road to the future, and down-to-earth to realize those visions that once made our hearts surge. In this way, together with our childhood selves, we will become a better and more complete version of ourselves.

Behind this nonsense is actually the "entrustment mentality", that is, entrusting some of one's inner needs (security, sense of achievement, sense of value, happiness, etc.) to the other party in the name of "expectations", and the other party will meet them.

Once the other party can't be satisfied, they will have resentment.

The specific reasons are:

1. Misplaced identity.

The identity positioning is: At this time, who do I think I think in my heart? A person can only have an identity and do a good job in one thing.

If a person does not change their identity in time during different events, there will be problems.

For example, the professional identity and the partner identity are misaligned, the professional identity is the leader, and as a result, in the family, the partner is treated in the same way as the subordinates, and the family is managed with the leader's way of thinking and behavioral habits;

For example, the social identity and the partner's identity are misaligned, the social identity is the trainer, and as a result, in the family, the partner is treated in the same way as the trainee, and the partner is educated in a didactic way;

Similarly, doctors treat their partners the same way they treat their patients; The counselor treats the partner in the same way as the client with the problem, etc. Cavity holes.

If you don't get along with each other as a partner, you will naturally not feel the value of the other person as a partner, and disappointment is inevitable.

At the same time, this practice will make the other person not feel your value as a partner, causing tension in the relationship between the two parties.

2. Projection failure.

Projection, in psychology, refers to the process by which a person transfers the patterns of getting along with his or her parents (need satisfaction mode, emotional interaction mode, emotional expression mode) and unmet needs and unreleased emotions in the state of origin to others.

For example, they will transfer their parents' mode of getting along with themselves to their partners, and treat their partners as children, so as to satisfy their psychology of being worshipped, needed, and depended on; or transfer some of the needs of the parents to the partner, treating the partner as a parent and needing the partner to satisfy themselves;

Once the partner does not satisfy himself, he will have feelings of grievance, disappointment, dissatisfaction, and even resentment.

This kind of complex, the transfer of needs, is instinctive and unconscious, and it is difficult to adjust it in a rational way. At the same time, this transfer is also ineffective, because the other person is not your child's parents, and you can only get real satisfaction from your own child's parents.

3. Immature mental model.

If a person is constantly disappointed in others, it may be a childlike mentality, he is used to being taken care of by those around him, and instinctively thinks that everything is what he deserves, and everyone should take care of him like his parents.

When someone doesn't do what he wants, he will be disappointed, angry, and blame others.

People who are controlled by imaginary desires cannot correctly evaluate the goodness and badness, progress and process of a thing.

Surprise them, not be deeply disappointed, this is the iron rule of everyone's life.

No matter how wonderful something is, it can't always satisfy our preconceived notions. If it actually exceeds our expectations, or if something turns out to be even better than we expected, then we feel happier.

Successful people pay attention to the details of commitment. He doesn't promise something lightly, even if he's sure of it. And there are many people in life who can't grasp the proportions of their promises, and their promises are very rash and disturbing, leaving no room for themselves, and the result is that the promised promises cannot be fulfilled.

It is important to know that if you have a commitment, you must work hard to do it, and do not write empty checks, otherwise you will not only hurt others, but also ruin your own reputation and make it difficult for you to gain a foothold in society. People's predictions of things are often better or worse than the real situation, and can never satisfy people's thoughts about the things themselves, we can easily imagine that something is very perfect, but in fact, it is very difficult to make a thing perfect, and desire and human imagination will produce many other unexpected things, which are rare. That is to say, reality is difficult to satisfy the human imagination.

So no matter what you do, you must keep a low profile, don't exaggerate excessively, and don't brag meaninglessly. Otherwise, even if you are realistic, you will often give people the feeling of disappointment. This can affect how others will judge and respect you.

In dealing with people, we should pay attention to words and faith, and deeds must be fruitful. Therefore!! Promises cannot be made arbitrarily and unspoken. Smart people generally fully estimate the objective conditions in advance, and try not to do things that are not sure of you, so that others have too high expectations of you.

Cheats for being a man: The higher you climb, the harder you fall.

If reality exceeds our expectations, or if something turns out to be better than we originally thought, then we will feel happier.

Colorful fireworks, crisp and loud firecrackers, fiery red lanterns, and affectionate blessings accompanied me to spend a peaceful and happy New Year. With a brisk pace and a bright sunshine, I returned to the beautiful campus with my schoolbag on my back and started the new semester of study and life. "The plan of the year lies in spring", spring is a season full of hope, and only those who sow seeds seriously in spring will usher in the fruits of autumn.

Today is the first day of school, I am happy to come to the school, the campus is still so beautiful. When I arrived at the classroom, a lot of classmates came, and they talked and laughed, just like brothers and sisters! Hey, why are there so many people on the podium, I was very curious, and the cat got up and got in.

Ao, it turns out that everyone is reading the message for the new semester written by Teacher Fan, and everyone is very puzzled, when did the teacher write it for us? After a while, Teacher Fan came, and as if he knew what we were going to ask, he said, "This is my message for the new semester that I wrote to you yesterday."

At this time, the students suddenly realized that the teacher had come to the school a day in advance to write a message for us for the new semester. We were all very moved, and felt that Mr. Fan was really a responsible and good teacher, and that he had to study well in the new semester before he could report the lead manuscript to the teacher.