How do you write a joke of less than 100 words and more than 50 words? Urgent need is urgent, and th

1. A county magistrate with a strong accent came to the village to make a report:"Rabbits, shrimps, pig tails! Don't pickle melon, pickles are too expensive!!

Translation: Comrades, villagers, pay attention! Don't speak, it's time for the meeting!!

After the county magistrate finished speaking, the host said:"Pickles please sausage pickles! "(Translation:.)

Translation: Don't speak, I'll tell you a story...

2. Taoyuan dialect is very peculiar, and the tail note is very high, for example"Bureau", and it is pronounced"Pigs"。First go to the Propaganda Department of the county party committee and contact the Personnel Bureau for an interview. The people from the Propaganda Department called ** to make an appointment for me, using hands-free.

Propaganda Department:"Hey, are you a pig? (Bureau of Personnel)."Other:

No, you're mistaken. I'm not a human being a pig (Personnel Bureau), my mother is a pig (Food Bureau). "I tried so hard to hold back my laughter that my stomach hurt.

The next day, I attended a debriefing meeting in a county. Roll call before the meeting. Moderator:

Which units have arrived? "So the participants reported themselves to their homes one by one:"I am a male gelding pig (Public Security Bureau).

My name is Pig (EDB). " "I'm a bit of a pig (post office). " "I'm a typical pig (telecommunications bureau).

It is possible to write a translation without it, and this should be achieved. Wish.

Male and female colleagues drove out on a trip, stopped on the side of the road to kiss, and were met by the patrol police. Ask the man, "Is this your car?"

Answer: "Unit." And then asked:

She's your wife? Answer: "It's also a unit."

The police were shocked: "What unit?" The benefits are so good!

Our unit only distributes mooncakes! ”

My wife went on a business trip and didn't come back for several days.

In the afternoon, when she had a meeting, she secretly sent me a text message, and the leader next to me slept like a dead pig, which was so funny

As a result, the telecom problem was sent to my phone in the middle of the night.

I almost didn't jump off the stairs...

Q: Who has lived in darkness all their lives?

Answer: Tinker Bell.

Q: Why?

Answer: Because he couldn't see his five fingers.

There was a mother who gave birth to a conjoined baby, and her sister's name was Mary, so what was her sister called? Answer: Monroe (Marilyn Monroe).

What color is celery poop? Answer: Yellow (Qin Shi Huang) At three o'clock in the afternoon, the scorching sun was in the sky, and the supervisor ordered:

Chop! Suddenly, the death row prisoner burst into laughter, and the prison officer asked, "Why are you laughing?"

The death row prisoner hesitated for a moment and said: The expert is really right, a smile every day can prolong life by 5 seconds.

The unique insights of the four famous books] are very incisive:

Water Margin: I cut; Journey to the West: I Change; Three Kingdoms:

I cried; Red Mansion: I say! Journey to the West:

Got it; Red Mansion: The family is defeated; Water Margin: Dead; Three Kingdoms:

It's unified! Water Margin: There are people on my rivers and lakes; Red Mansion:

There are people in my court; Journey to the West: There are people in the sky; Three Kingdoms: I have to be human!

Water Margin: Mostly men; Red Mansions: Mostly women; Journey to the West:

Most are not people; Three Kingdoms: Most of them are people!

Not far away, a guy drove with his wife and father-in-law past the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco. As soon as he crossed the bridge, he was stopped by the police standing on the side of the road and the mayor of San Francisco. The policeman said to him with a smile on his face

You are the 500,000,000,000,000 person who has crossed the Golden Gate Bridge since it was built, and the Mayor will give you $5,000 as a souvenir. The old man was so happy that he couldn't keep his mouth shut. The police asked him:

What are you doing with the 5,000 yuan? The old man hurriedly said, "I'm so poor that I can't even afford a driver's license, so the first thing I need to do is to hurry up and get one."

His wife listened with a wide range of eyes and quickly told the police: "Don't listen to his nonsense, he talks nonsense when he gets drunk." ”

The old father-in-law, who had been dozing in the car, woke up at this time, saw the policeman, and shouted angrily: "You see, I said a long time ago, the stolen car can't go far!" ”

The problem of alcoholics.

You're almost cured, and now you can drink a small glass of wine during the day. "Great! Excuse me, how many glasses of wine can I have? ”

The fire Xiao Ming came home and talked to his mother.

Ming: Mom, I have two messages, one good and one bad, which one do you listen to?

Mom: Okay one.

Ming: The school was burned.

Mom: What's the good news? What about the bad?

Ming: The test paper was actually rescued!

It's funny. Xiao Wang was in a hurry, so he rushed into a public toilet, there were two cubicles in the toilet, the first one was empty, and the second one was full of people. Xiao Wang immediately thought that the first compartment might be very dirty, but he couldn't hold it back, so he rushed in and unexpectedly found that it was very clean. Xiao Wang took a closer look, there was a small story on the wall, Xiao Wang was deeply attracted when he read the first sentence, and the more he looked at it, the more interesting he felt, but the story was interrupted at the most critical time, leaving only one line of words:

Go down to the second room. Xiao Wang hurriedly came out and lined up in the second room......

Guo Degang and Liu Qian took the car to the prairie and got off.

Qian: Which of the two is good or bad?

Gang: Bad. Qian: I lost all my money, so I had to eat cow dung.

Gang: Ah! Okay?

Qian: Cow dung is there!

Melon seed face, red crisp hands, willow thin waist, cherry mouth, apricot eyes and willow eyebrows, white skin like lotus root ......You're so beautiful, more beautiful than plants, are you the legendary vegetative person?!

Manager: Why do you have to take time off every month?

Secretary: Someone from my mother's house is here.

Manager: What's your name?

Secretary: It's called Liu Honghong.

Manager: Liu Honghong!? He's my cousin. Then I'll go with him too.

A: Do you have A Brief History of Time? B: Neuropathy! I don't pick it up when I have time!

The bride went to the doctor, the doctor said what's wrong with you, the bride said Minting ate too much, the doctor said why not read the instructions, the bride said read it, it said one tablet at a time, (one tablet a day).

A couple was walking down a desolate sheep intestine path on a dark and windy night, and the man asked, "Are you afraid?" “。

You now have a cockroach on your shoulder." Woman: "Ah!

Faint!

1) Penguin Meat Problem:

One day a girl made a dish for a boy, and the boy finished it, but he thought it tasted strange, so he asked the girl, "What kind of meat is this?" The girl said that it was penguin meat, and the boy pondered for a moment. I cried bitterly and committed suicide, why?

2) Jumping Train Problem:

A person took a train to a neighboring town to see a doctor, and after seeing it, he was completely cured. On the way back, the train passed through a tunnel, and the man jumped out of the car and committed suicide, why?

3) Aquatic weed problem:

A man went for a walk with his girlfriend by the river, and suddenly his girlfriend fell into the river, so the man hurriedly jumped into the water to look for it, but he couldn't find his girlfriend, and he left the place sadly. After a few years, he revisited the old place, and then saw an old man fishing, but the fish he caught did not have aquatic weeds on it, so he asked the old man why the fish did not have any aquatic weeds on his body, and the old man said, "You don't know, this river has never grown aquatic weeds."

Speaking of which, the man suddenly jumped into the water and committed suicide, why?

4) Questions with Funeral Stories:

There were three mothers and daughters, the mother died, the sisters went to the funeral, and the younger sister met a very stylish man at the funeral and fell in love with him at first sight. But after the funeral, the man was gone, and my sister couldn't find him. Later, a month later, my sister killed my sister, why?

5) Half a Match Problem:

There was a man in the desert, dead head down, with several suitcases scattered around him, and this man clutched half a match tightly in his hand, reasoning how this man died?

6) Wood chips all over the floor:

There are two gnomes in the circus, the blind gnome is shorter than the other, the circus only needs one gnome, and the dwarf in the circus is of course the shorter the better. The two gnomes decide who is shorter than the tallest, and the tallest one will commit suicide. However, the day before the appointment was made, the blind dwarf, the short dwarf, had committed suicide at home.

In his home, nothing but wood furniture and sawdust were found all over the floor. Ask him why he committed suicide?

7} Knocking on the door in the middle of the night:

A man lived in a hut on the top of the mountain, and in the middle of the night he heard a knock on the door, but he opened the door but no one came, so he went to sleep, and after waiting for a while there was another knock on the door, and when he went to open the door, there was still no one, and so on several times. The next day, a dead body was found at the foot of the mountain and the man at the top of the mountain was taken away. Why?

8.Reply to the question.

People who read this log and don't turn around, the same thing happened the next day, do you know what happened?

1.One day, a young lady called a taxi. Miss:

Hello! I'm at such and such an intersection, and I'm going to take a taxi. Driver:

So what are you wearing? Miss: "I wear a white shirt and a blue skirt."

Driver: "To **?" Miss:

to the knees. Driver:

The trio went to see a psychiatrist.

A: "I want to jump off a building." ”

B: "I want to lie on the rails." ”

C: "I want to get married." ”

After hearing this, the psychiatrist said to C, "You are the most suicidal of the three." ”

3.One day I was on the street with a friend, and I came across a convertible Ferrari, which was called a puller, and I said, "That's handsome!" ”

My friend said: "Based on my experience in appreciating cars for so many years, I can see at a glance that this car is a second-hand QQ that was changed by removing the ceiling, obviously, because the number of tires is the same." ”

I didn't say anything all the way.

4.What I watched on TV said that nutritionists said that fruits and vegetables should be eaten first, then staple foods, and finally meat, because fruits and vegetables are digested the fastest, followed by starch, and protein is the slowest.

I listened to it and thought it made sense, after I ate a melon, a bowl of noodles, I found that my beloved roast duck could not be eaten...

What nutritionist are you**!!

5.Every time I take the elevator and hear the sound of "ding" opening the door, I feel like I'm in the microwave. Sometimes there are acquaintances inside.

One day, the teacher took a group of children to the mountain to pick fruits, and he announced: "Children, after picking fruits, we will wash them together, and we can eat them together after washing." All the children went to pick fruit.

When the meeting time came, all the children gathered. Teacher: "Xiaohua, what did you pick?"

Xiaohua: "I'm washing apples because I picked apples." Teacher:

What about you, Xiaomei? Xiaomei: "I'm washing tomatoes because I picked tomatoes."

Teacher: "The children are great! What about you, Amin?

Amin: "I'm washing my shoes because I'm stepping on poop." ”

It's a very good joke.

It is said that a farmer drove an ox cart into the city and was stopped by the police, the reason was that there was no license plate, the farmer found a broken wooden board and wrote a plate to hang up, and the police immediately fainted after seeing it, and the sign read: Niu X-74110. When I was in elementary school, I thought the latest time in the world was half past nine.,When I went to middle school, I found that there was more than ten o'clock.,High school thought that if you didn't sleep at half past eleven, you would die the next day.,Now I'll pout my lips contemptuously.,It's only past twelve o'clock.。。。

Math Teacher: "....Now, we can conclude that x is equal to zero. Student:

Alas, it's all in vain. In art class, the teacher asked the students to draw portraits, but everyone was busy with Chinese and math homework, and no one drew a picture. The art teacher was furious:

If it takes too long, you can stair with a high chance.

At night, I went to the supermarket downstairs in the dormitory to buy snacks to eat, a total of 13 yuan.

After I gave the proprietress a hundred dollars, I thought about it and handed it over to three yuan, wanting to say that it was convenient to find money.

The proprietress said, "No need, this hundred yuan is enough." "Laughpic laughs.

As for Xiao Ming, he has an exam tomorrow, but he is watching TV at night.

Xiao Ming's mother praised Xiao Ming very happily: Good boy, then you must do well in the exam tomorrow Xiao Ming cried and said: Mom, I mean, 'Mom, I see, it's over'.

"Dad, Xiaohua's dad swims very well, why are you swimming so ugly? ”

Xiaohua's father eats a lot of fish, so he swims well, and I don't eat fish often, so of course I don't swim well. ”

You've eaten more chickens than anyone else, and I've never seen you lay eggs!" ”

Summary. Hello, I am helping you to inquire about the relevant information and will reply to you immediately.

Write a 50-word joke.

Hello, I am helping you to inquire about the relevant information and will reply to you immediately.

There was a boy whose head looked like a brick, and his classmates laughed at him, and he went to ask his mother if his head looked like a brick, and his mother told him to go to the well to take a look, but as soon as he put his head in, someone below shouted to the people above to pay attention, don't throw bricks.

Hello, glad to answer for you, your question has been answered, is there anything else you need me to help you with?

If you are satisfied, you can click "End Service" at the top right and give me another like? Thank you.

A dentist said to his patient, "I'm sorry, but you need to have this wisdom tooth removed." ”

The patient asked, "Oh, really?" These wisdom teeth are very smart. ”

Dentist: "Really?" I didn't see it. ”

Patient: "yes, because it's always helped me go around other teeth!" ”

Although the joke is only a few short sentences, it embodies a sense of humor and wit that greatly arouses the interest and empathy of the audience. We are often surrounded by all kinds of problems and stresses in our lives, and humor and jokes can go some way to dissolving these troubles, allowing people to relax, reduce stress, and build friendly relationships.

When we are in a tense or dull situation, a small joke is enough to break the ice and relieve the tension. Jokes are also a vivid way of expressing language, which can turn simple and boring topics into fun. At the same time, through creative humor and jokes, we can also eliminate prejudices and stereotypes, break down barriers, and promote cross-cultural communication.

However, there are many types of jokes, some are funny, some are philosophical, close to daily life, involving politics, culture, life and even human nature, some jokes can resonate with people, some can make people think deeply, which also reminds us to look at jokes rationally, not only to fully understand the meaning, but also to apply them to daily life. <>