How to face the bride price culture, if it is beyond its own ability, is it normal not to give the b

Normally, husband and wife are the foundation of humanity, so marriage culture is the most important branch culture in any social form. The ancient marriage culture mainly includes three aspects: the first is the dominance of marriage.

As both parties to the marriage, they have no dominance in the marriage that is related to their lifelong happiness. "The order of the parents, the words of the matchmaker" This is where the dominance lies.

After entering the modern society, the marriage system has also undergone earth-shaking changesFor example, equality between men and women and freedom of marriage have become the mainstream of marriage culture, and the marriage registration system has replaced the marriage declaration system of "three media and six certificates" in ancient society, and so on. However, the marriage procedures left over from ancient society have also been inherited and continued to a certain extent. In the ancient marriage "six rites", the "levy" included the procedure of the man "giving a dowry" to the woman's family.

In the high bride price area, there have also been many campaigns to boycott the bride price and advocate a new style of marriage, but with little or no effect, the bride price is still unimpeded. There are many reasons for this, such as the imbalance between men and women, with more men than women; the cultural inertia of "easy to move mountains, easy to vulgar"; The psychology of comparison between the female parties exists, and the psychology of buying and selling in a very small number of women's families; Professional matchmakers who withdraw commissions from the bride price and so on.

There are also many families who find the reason for asking for a high bride price: it is handed down by the ancestors, and this is to protect the interests of girls. This reason seems to be very reasonable, but in the social context of the existence of the ancient bride price system, this reason can only be half tenable.

Indeed, the ancient marriage culture did have a tradition of paying the bride price, so it is correct to say that the bride price is a tradition left by the ancestors. However, if you want to kidnap the high bride price and the inheritance of traditional culture, it seems too far-fetched or even forceful.

I think it's very normal, because two people who really love each other will not be affected by external conditions, let alone exceed their own capabilities.

I think that after all, the bride price is a tradition from ancient times to the present, and it is not good to negotiate with the woman beyond your own ability, and it is not good to give a little less, and not to give a bride price.

The bride price itself is a cultural custom, and the picture is a joy, if it is beyond one's own ability, it is not very suitable.

The bride price is a custom, how much you can negotiate yourself, if you really can't do it, just follow the local ordinary standards.

It has been a custom since ancient times for the man to hire and the woman to accept the lottery. It means that when a man wants to marry a woman, he needs to give the woman's family gift money (goods and money), which is commonly known as the bride price, which represents the meaning of a man's attitude of treating the woman as a treasure and sincerely asking for marriage, and it is also a thank you salute to the father-in-law and mother-in-law for raising her daughter.

Whether to give or give, how much to give depends on how to communicate with the woman's family. Originally, marriage was a happy event, and it could not be broken up unhappily because of the bride price.

The bride price is all a name, and the meaning is forgotten.

It is not normal not to give a bride price, it is already a traditional custom.

If you exceed your own ability, you can negotiate with the woman, give less, and it is not good not to give a bride price.

What do you think about the bride price? The meaning of the bride price is the attitude of the man and the man's family towards the marriage, and expresses the degree of importance and recognition of the woman. Only by valuing and recognizing the woman will the man be willing to pay more bride price, so that the woman and the woman's family can feel your sincerity.

If you are not too satisfied with the woman and the woman's family, you are naturally unwilling to pay a bride price that exceeds their expectations. It's not that the bride price is good after more marriage, and the bride price is not good after marriage. However, having a bride price will still make the woman and her family feel happy.

The significance of the bride price is actually very large.

It was a symbol of engagement in ancient times, and many people did not understand the true meaning of the bride price. In ancient times, if the man's family took a fancy to a girl, they would go to their house to say that the matchmaker was married, and then voluntarily give the woman's family a bride price. First, after the woman's family marries her daughter to the man, she is unable to serve her biological parents regularly, and these bride prices are used to make up for the girl's inability to serve her parents often and repay her kindness.

The second is that the man's family wants to marry the woman's sincerity, because after many years, she has to take care of her elderly father-in-law and mother-in-law.

This is the respect that the man's family has for the girl, and it is also to reduce the worry about the parents for his future daughter-in-law. The true meaning of the bride price is full of warmth and understanding. I think the bride price should be the child's upbringing fee for the woman's parents to manage the child until she is in her 20s, if you want a bride price of 200,000 yuan, then, assuming that the girl is 25 years old.

The annual maintenance fee is less than 10,000 yuan. It is impossible for a big living person to give it to the man for nothing, I think it is right to ask for a bride price, but it can't be excessive. Nor can a man object to a woman's bride price.

After all, it is a big living person, who comes to your house to give birth to children, serve the elderly, do housework for you, and dedicate all our love to this person for you, we should not have many points, we can only blame ourselves for not having the ability, not making money, not saving money, this is my understanding and opinion.

The market decides. Marriage and love are also a market, women are a resource, and good women have advantages. Since they all wanted to have a son, they had to accept the fierce competition today.

Or to use an analogy, a buyer's market and a seller's market, this metaphor is not appropriate, but the principle seems to be the same, when a certain resource is not enough, the price will inevitably rise!

I think it is still necessary to give a bride price on this issue, which is also an attitude of both parties, and there is not much amount of money required.

I think it is necessary to give some bride price, after all, if you give birth to a child, you have to follow the man's surname, and the woman has always been the one who pays, so it is more equal for men and women.

I think the bride price is as it should be. Because the parents of girls have put in a lot of effort to cultivate good girls. When the girl grows up, she goes to another family to be filial to other parents.

The boy's family should come up with some bride price, which is a sign of respect for the girl.

This is a normal thing, it has been passed down for many years, and this is what every guy should give to a woman.

The man should also be responsible for expressing the support of the woman's parents in the future, so that they do not have any worries, some of the woman's parents want a bride price and are only worried about their future pension problems, and now there are too few people who know how to be filial to their parents and provide for their parents. On the other hand, it may also be considered that the son-in-law will not be good for his daughter in the future, and the result of the divorce will also have a guarantee, if it is for these reasons to consider the bride price, then there is nothing worth hating, for the right and wrong of the bride price, standing in different angles, different specific situations, there are really different definitions of right and wrong.

Money can express whether it is sincere, time is also testing everything, in this era, how many couples say divorce, everything is not so reliable, for the fickle heart, everyone is considering their own interests, and there are too few couples who can share the joys and sorrows. No matter what parents think, I personally believe that respecting the wishes of children is the most important thing, and whether the feelings are sincere or not, children use their own way to test.

As parents, they should respect their children's choices, and whether they are right or wrong is up to their children, such parents are worthy of praise! Filial piety comes first, I hope that people in this society can be filial to their parents, so that they have no worries, and raising children and daughters is not just to be able to provide for themselves?

As for the rights and wrongs of the bride price, it mainly depends on the reason why the woman's parents ask for the bride price, if it is just to ask for money, the lion opens his mouth, it is naturally wrong, if he is considering his own pension in the future, worried that his daughter's marriage may come to the step of divorce in the future, then it is reasonable to ask for a bride price, and there is no provision at the legal level that how much is illegal, but it is stipulated that money cannot be claimed on the grounds of marriage, and it is forbidden to buy and sell marriages and other acts that interfere with the freedom of marriage. However, if the marriage really comes to the stage of divorce, the man can ask the woman to return the bride price, and the law will give the man support, such as these situations: the two parties have not gone through the marriage registration formalities, the two parties have gone through the marriage registration formalities but have not lived together, and the payment is made before marriage and causes the payer to live in difficulty.

When the man does not have the financial ability to bear the bride price, I hope that the two parties can talk directly, maybe to solve everyone's problems, if possible, the man can also consider marrying and becoming a son-in-law.

Sometimes you can't rush, look at it from a different angle.

We also encountered the problem of bride price when we got married, but the bride price should be done according to our means, and one party borrowed money because of the bride price, and the woman's family still had to repay it in the past? I suggest that if you want or give, you should do what you can, not think more about your children.

Bride price, very disgusting customs, that is the product of the inferiority of men and women in the past, now the society advocates the equality of men and women, and women have been sparing no effort to fight for their rights, so why do you want a bride price? In the past, when a woman married, she was a member of the family, but now it is not, no matter whether you are married or not, both men and women have the same inheritance rights and have the same maintenance obligations, why do you still need that bride price? Moreover, if the bride price is only symbolic, in order to please the bride price, it is understandable, why is the bride price more and more now?

My family gave the bride price, but I was very unwilling, because the bride price was too much, causing the wedding preparation process to be very disgusting, and I was disappointed in the woman's family.

Alas! I'm worried about this matter, and if I think the other party is good, it's almost fine. If you don't have much emotion, you will definitely be demanding.

First of all, I think you ask how much of the bride price can represent love? There can be no definite answer to this question itself, there can only be a relative answer, maybe this also shows the greatness of the theory of relativity, hehe, if the conditions of the two families allow, I think there is nothing to blame for having a bride price, after all, people are giving their daughters to you, and the bride price is still to be given to you in the end, besides, if you really love someone, want to marry her, if you give the bride price, you can get married, isn't it a very simple way? Isn't it always said that problems that can be solved with money are not problems?

In the end, you have a wedding, so what is it to pay a little? Unless you care about more money, so use this as an excuse to say something disgusting or something like that, so don't give it, so it's the last to disperse, but also your own heart is a little unwilling, it's not about the bride price at all, parents want their daughters to marry more beautifully, want to show their son-in-law ability, although we may not be able to accept, but this is also very normal, if you are so good for your children that you don't have a mind, is it a bit indifferent? So if you have this proposal, give it if you can, and remember the final result, not for you to be more serious in the process.

If it's me, if the man's family is really capable, I won't skip the bride price this step, after all, the era in which my parents lived had this concept, although love is beautiful, but the nurturing family affection can not be replaced, I will not accept what some people put forward What is the era and this custom, at least I will not let my parents be wronged, he must also have the idea of protecting my family, I don't think it is unreasonable. But if the man's family conditions are not very good, I will explain the situation to my parents, you can go to register first, after all, with a certificate is the real marriage, not the wedding, if the parents really agree with this son-in-law, they will not embarrass your husband in this regard, but will let you determine the help maybe, in short, this is a very normal process, I have no resentment.

Hello question. My boyfriend's mother told me yesterday that he was buying a house and renovating it now, and now he didn't have the money to get married, but he urged us to get married, and said otherwise, you see how much dowry you want here, and then we'll use the credit card first, and then I'll lend it to them and pay it back first, and then they will return it to me when they sell another house. (The other house has been on the market for a year and hasn't been sold) and then her mom urged me to get pregnant, what should I do.

Question: Her mother often called her poor in front of me, bought a house in the center of Hangzhou, and said that she had no money in her hand. There's still an amount of debt outside, and there's really nothing you can do.

Question: Well, her mother said that she would not wait for a year until the house was sold, and then get married, but she urged me to get pregnant.

Tell them that the bride price is a guarantee for yourself.

Question, but my family is urging me again, and my family says, "If they really want to be honest with you, they will marry you if they borrow money."

It's not that I don't have no opinions, I'm really embarrassed, on one side is my family, and on the other hand, he, I'm really difficult.

It's not that our material bride price is a guarantee for our women, and we must have it.

Question: I know, hey, I'm really hard.