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How much does verbal violence from parents hurt children? Accepting their child's imperfections is something every parent must learn. No matter how well the child behaves, the parent's yelling and violent language is harmful to the child, and the parent's bad temper affects the child's lifelong happiness, making the child insecure, sensitive and inferior.
Which words do the most harm to children?
I saw a report that a mother in the United States was angry when she saw her son addicted to online games all day long, decadent and depressed, and couldn't listen to it, so she brought a loaded pistol and put it on the table, and said something she would regret forever. The result was tragic, as his son grabbed a gun and pulled the trigger on his head to end his young life.
Her mother's despair at that time, the heart-rending pain was indescribable, and she collapsed on the ground, and only tears of regret could not turn back time. We can imagine that the child must have experienced self-blame, pain and helplessness, and his mother's words have a kind of don't live, knocking heavily on the child's heart, which became the last straw that broke the camel's back.
Every parent wants their children to be healthy and happy, so how can we avoid harming them? Parents can think about organizing the language so that their children can be more receptive.
For example, if the child is naughty in the living room and makes the room dirty and messy, what will we parents say, we will generally be angry and say, why are you so annoying, too annoying, too disobedient. When the child listens, he will resist in his heart, is it that his parents are annoyed with me and no longer love me? You can change it, so to speak, good baby, I hope you can develop a good habit of cleaning up and being a hard-working little bee that mom and dad like, okay?
Comparing the two statements, the child is more receptive to the second one, which can also serve the purpose of education.
Share parenting knowledge every day, so that parents can be more worry-free and children are better.
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openly mocking the child's shortcomings; humiliating children in front of many people; distrusting children and always questioning them; There are also demeaning children. For example, "You're so bad now, and you won't be better in the future." "Solve your own problems, don't expect us to go far with you.
If you don't obey every day, I think you just don't fight enough. ”
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Don't tell your child that your husband and wife are not in harmony. Don't plant bad seeds in your child's heart, but show the good side of your parents to your children, because children will follow their parents' example.
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What parents can't say to their children, stupid, useless things, I can't do it if I say no, I don't care about you anymore, if you get 100 points in the test, I'll buy it for you...., It's all the same child, why are you not as good as others, why are you so stupid?
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1.Don't say that children are not good-looking. In the eyes of parents, children should be the best-looking.
2.Don't say that children can't do it, and their grades are not as good as others. In this way, the child's self-esteem will be affected.
3.Don't always tell your children that your parents are going to divorce. He wants to have a warm family, so he doesn't want his parents to divorce.
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You're a sister, and you're going to let your sister. Educating children in this tone for a long time will only make the eldest party hold a grudge against their younger siblings, and gradually become a mustard between siblings; The younger siblings, on the other hand, will rely on their young age and take others for granted, and will continue to make mistakes in the future.
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1.If it weren't for you, your dad and I would have divorced a long time ago.
2.If you go to school now and look for a job in the future, you have to rely on the trust relationship to go through the back door.
3.You were born to be a useless person, and that's it for the rest of your life.
4.Study hard, find a good partner, and you will be happy in this life in the future.
5.Parents work hard to save your family property, so that you don't have to struggle, don't have to endure hardships, just enjoy the blessings in the future.
6.This kid is smart, he doesn't care about it at all, he will naturally become a talent.
7.Don't let yourself suffer, others beat you with a false spring fist, and you beat him with two punches.
8.Don't do anything when you go to your mother-in-law's house, let them do it.
9.Child, you have to remember that it is your fault that you remember, and it is not your fault, don't admit your mistake.
10.Don't work too hard, just live comfortably.
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1. What do you know as a child?
Parents should remember not to say this to their children casually, because although children are very young, they also have their own world and crave recognition and respect. When parents face their children's desire to explore and seek knowledge, but parents bluntly refuse and deny, the child's psychology will be hurt, the child's self-confidence will be hit, and after a long time, it will become introverted and inferior, imprisoning the development of the child's creative ability.
Second, your parents are unproductive, it's all up to you.
To tell the truth, in every family, children are pinned on all their hopes by their parents, especially in some families in adversity, often hear parents nagging in front of their children, parents can understand the eagerness of their children to become Jackie Chan, but if they often nag these words in front of their children, it will bring strong psychological pressure to children, bring negative emotions to children, and affect the healthy growth of children.
Three, why are you so stupid, you can't learn this.
As the saying goes: no one is perfect, and it is impossible for a person to be perfect in everything, and this is true for adults and children. For children, what is most needed is the encouragement of parents, relying only on sarcasm will only hit the child's self-confidence, although the parents' intentions are well-intentioned, but it will not bring encouragement to the child, but harm, which will not only kill the child's ability to do things well, but also stifle the child's hope for the future.
Fourth, you will be rewarded if you score 100 points.
This sentence is the opposite of the practice mentioned above, and this kind of so-called encouragement, which is more utilitarian, will also lead children astray. Parents should know that what to do, you need to master a degree, for the child should complete the things, give appropriate rewards on it, learning is a matter of the child's part, good grades are inevitable, rewards are just an incentive means, but can not become an end. Motivation needs autonomy to be long-lasting, and rewards alone are not sustainable.
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Adults' habits may plant seeds of doubt in children's hearts, and they often think about it over and over again.
Intimidation, to any degree.
Accidentally swallowing a seed, parents can explain it scientifically, not to say that it will sprout in the stomach and grow into a tree.
Children will worry about their stomachs all day long, but parents don't know what happened to their children, the police came to arrest you, gave you to the wolf grandmother, there are ghosts, eat earwax and become dumb.
Some people may think that these are small things, but small things or big things are what the child was feeling at that time.
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Dad can't say these words to the child, otherwise it will affect the child's life.
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Can you stay on your own for a while.
Silly big man! ”
You're so ignorant.
Can you? I think xx is more suitable.
If you cry again, Grandma Wolf will take you away.
If you don't obey me, I don't want you!
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