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I haven't had a face for a long time, and when a friend encounters something sad, as a friend knows, I should still comfort and comfort and express my heart.
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This can come according to your thoughts, because you haven't been in touch for a long time, which means that your relationship is not very deep, but because you are friends, you can comfort this and live up to the previous friendship. If you don't want to comfort you, it's okay, because you haven't been in touch for a long time, and there's no need to re-contact. It's good to come according to your heart.
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Since it's a friend, you should comfort it, a friend, help if you can, this is human nature.
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At this time, there must be a distance of comfort, because you have not been in touch for a long time, and you don't know much about each other's recent situation, it seems more appropriate to be a listener at this time, and don't speak casually.
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Since we are friends, no matter how long we haven't been in touch with him, when he encounters something sad, I think you should still comfort and love him.
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I think of course it needs to be. Because friends need to help each other.
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Now that you know about it. Although I haven't been in touch for a long time. But as a friend, I feel like you should be comforted and comforted.
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It depends on what sad things you encounter, and most people are reluctant to mention sad things. The relationship with the fruit is general, and if the relationship is good, accompany him more.
Personal humble opinion, for reference.
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A true friend is one who gets along when he needs it most and when it's most difficult, so it doesn't matter how long he doesn't get in touch. What matters is your heart, your care.
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This situation depends on whether or not you communicate emotionally in the process of getting along. Good! If it's been a long time since you have been in touch, you don't have the urge and desire to comfort him. Then you can do without it. But in the past, if the relationship with you was good, you should be comforted.
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As a close friend, when he encounters something sad, you should reach out to help him, open your heart to accept him, and comfort him with enthusiasm, this is what a friend should do, isn't it, you can also experience happiness in the process of helping him.
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Since it is a friend, of course it should be comforted, friend, it is also a friend who has not been in touch for a long time, and when you encounter a sad thing, you should not only comfort, but also help.
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1. Be a good listener. Due to differences in life experience, family background, education, etc., each person's psychological characteristics are different, and their understanding of distress is different. Therefore, when trying to comfort a person, it is important to first understand his distress.
Comforting, listening is more important than speaking. A depressed heart needs a gentle listening ear, not a logical, well-organized head. Listening is to listen to the other person's voice with our ears and hearts, not to ask about the cause and effect of things, and not to rush to judgment, but to give the other person space so that he can freely express his feelings.
When listening, empathize with the other person and perceive the touch in our hearts. If we can "grieve his sorrow and rejoice in his happiness" for what happened to him, this is the best comfort for the comforted person.
2. Accept each other's world. The biggest obstacle to comforting people is often the inability of comforters to understand, experience, and agree with the distress that the person perceives. It is easy for people to limit the definition of distress to the scope of their own understanding, and once they exceed this range, they think that "suffering" is unreasonable.
Because they do not take the "pain" of others seriously, the comforter is prone to have a reverse psychology in the process of listening, and cannot wait to interrupt others to express their own opinions. This often makes it difficult for the "comfort" to continue. Therefore, the comforter needs to let go of his own deep-seated beliefs and prejudices and truly put himself in the other person's shoes to see the problems he is facing.
This is what psychologists call "letting go of your own world and accepting someone else's world". The best comforter is to temporarily let go of oneself, go into the other person's inner world, and see what happened to him with his eyes without judgment.
3. Explore and understand each other's life experiences together. The comforter often feels obligated to offer a solution for the other person. As everyone knows, almost every person who is tormented by distress has had the experience of constant attempts and failures before seeking comfort.
So, all we have to do is explore the path the other person has taken, understand his struggle, let him be heard, understood, recognized, and tell him that he has done enough, good enough, and that's comforting.
Psychologists remind comforters of an important idea: "Comfort is not the same as psychological." Psychology is to make people change, and to get rid of distress through change; Comfort, on the other hand, is affirming, recognizing, and re-experiencing the pain, and understanding the value of the pain can give people deep thinking.
In fact, in the process of comforting someone, any solution offered is likely to fail and disappoint the other person again, and we should be careful not to intervene and not to judge right and wrong, but to listen, understand and agree with their distress, which is the highest principle of comfort.
4. Accompany each other for a journey in the soul. The other party will feel safe and warm in the company of your intentions, so he will pour out his pain, tell his resentment, self-blame, regret, and say all the things he wants to say.
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1. Comforting advice.
1.Listen quietly.
People who are not good at words don't have to be afraid that they can't comfort their friends like this, as long as they are by their side, listening to the other party venting their emotions is already very heartwarming.
2.Accompany friends to eat hot pot.
There is no trouble that cannot be solved by food, one meal is not good, two meals, in the fireworks to re-energize friends, suitable for foodie friends
3.Divert attention.
If a friend is stuck in ruminative thinking and will unconsciously repeat and recall negative events and negative emotions, you should divert your friend's attention, for example, you can ask your friend to go on a mountain picnic and turn their focus to other things.
4.Give him a hug.
Sometimes, a warm hug is worth a thousand words. Your hug can actually give your friend the strength to keep going
5.Give him some advice.
If your friend is depressed, don't give advice at this time, because he will feel that you don't understand him and that you are picking on him.
If you want to give advice, you can wait until he is done venting his emotions and his reason is on the line. This allows him to understand his own problems and accept suggestions with an open mind.
6.Make him feel cared for.
The most important thing is to make your friends feel that you care, give Chun Qingliang the opportunity to confide in the other party, provide emotional support to the other party, and preferably provide support in action.
2. Words that are suitable for comfort.
1.Don't worry, I believe in your abilities, in my heart, you have always been that shining person.
2.When I want to go shopping and eat, I'm always available!
3.Cry if you want to, I'll be with you.
4.I'm always there, and you can come to me at any time.
5.How can I help? You can come to me if you need it.
6.No matter how much you lose, you must have the courage to smile in the sun.
7.Life must have cracks for sunlight to shine in.
8.Time will slowly precipitate, some people will slowly blur in your heart, learn to let go, your happiness needs its own fulfillment.
9.Life has always left us bruised, but in the end, those wounded places will surely become our strongest places.
10.It's not your fault, you've worked hard.
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Just accompany him, and you don't need words.
If you want to find someone you haven't been in touch with for a long time, the first thing to start with is to find your friends and relatives to see if anyone knows him, and then through various means. **CONTACT** to find out.
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