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If parents are particularly fierce to their children when they are young, they will treat their children with violent behavior, no matter what mistakes the children make. Then it is very likely that your children will feel that this society is very scary, and no matter what they do in this society, they will become very cowardly, because they are afraid that others will also treat them violently.
When children are young, parents are busy with work and do not have time to take care of their children. Let the child stay alone at home from an early age, so that the little one will feel very curious about this society, and also fearful. They don't know what this society is like, because they've never seen it, so they act like they're cowardly.
When the child is young, the parents often quarrel at home, which can also make the child especially scared. In the future, when he entered the society, he did not dare to quarrel with others, because he was afraid that he would quarrel with others like his parents and become very cowardly.
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I think my personality is a bit cowardly, and I think it has something to do with my parents' education, so let me share my opinion here.
The first is excessive spoiling. I have always treated my children as little children, talking and eating and coaxing, so that the child's heart will be very simple, but it is easier to have a glass heart, and when others have a slightly bad attitude, they can't be overwhelmed. <>
The second case is like my parents. When they are in a good mood, they hold me and coax me hard, and when they are not in a good mood, they are very fierce, especially my mother, who was also angry when she was young, and she scolded and beat people in every way. When I was a child, I was quite lively, but then I was scolded a lot, and I didn't like to talk to my family about anything, so I was bent on living in school.
Once, when there was a conflict with children outside, my mother came back and attacked me and beat me up. You can imagine why I didn't have the confidence to be bullied outside.
I think the most important thing for parents is to give their children a sense of trust and dependence. No matter how to discipline the child, you must pay attention to the child's psychological situation, the child is very sensitive in his heart, don't leave the problem and don't know, as the child grows up, the problem may become bigger and bigger.
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1. Lack of awareness of boundaries, regard children as accessories, and do not respect children's autonomy in personal life. 2. Forcing children to bend their will through moral kidnapping, or accusing them of unfilial piety, or going through the hardships of raising children. 3. On the platform, if you don't agree, you will belittle your children's character, ability and even personality.
4. Single values, believing that the perceptual experience based on their own experience is the truth of life, holding a negative attitude towards things they don't understand, and requiring their children to follow their own values. 5. Attach importance to the authority of parents and ignore educational methods, and like to admonish children with empty truths, rather than conducting more equal and effective communication.
6. Do not know how to manage emotions, or often vent negative emotions on their children, or be moody and cause their children to lack a sense of security, or involve their children in the conflicts of their own marital life. 7. Strong vanity, regard children as a tool for comparison, and do not pay attention to their inner feelings and personal happiness. 8. Strong desire to control, express opinions on any trivial matters.
9. Treat people harshly, unable to properly tolerate the mistakes of children, and often turn over old accounts. 10. Double standards, on the one hand, parents who are too demanding of their children, and on the other hand, who think that there is nothing in the world, do not admit or reflect on their own mistakes.
All human suffering is essentially anger at one's own impotence. "We have all been angry and bitter about our inability to do anything about our parents' words and actions. And when you grow up, you will also have character defects because of this.
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<> if the child has a weak personality, most of them are still insecure. Today's children, compared to before, carry too many things, do things they don't want to do, and are afraid of living up to their parents' expectations of themselves. Most parents want their son to become a Chan, but they don't think about the *** it may bring.
When the child is young, he has to cultivate the child's independent personality and does not want the child to lose at the starting line. Actually, it's a lot of money. The human body is very delicate, and the mind is also very delicate, as long as it is correctly guided, when it reaches that suitable stage, the child will naturally be on the right track.
If you have to change something, the child's ability to accept the mind will not reach that level, and it will only be counterproductive. He only knows that his parents ask him to do this, then he will do it, if he does not achieve the results that his parents want, then he will have an inferiority complex, premature independence, in fact, is not good, it will only make the child's concept of parents more and more shallow, and the anxiety in his heart is more and more profound. Parents should encourage their children more, chat with him more, and praise him more; My baby was reluctant to make friends at first;
Once I asked him why he was crying, he said that someone else robbed his toy, and then I took him to find the child, and told the child that it was wrong to snatch toys and hit someone, if there was a next time I would hit your palm, the child cried and ran, I turned around and told my son, there will be children like this in the future, you will fight back for me, don't be afraid of the mother here, let him take this step by himself. In order to exercise him, let him not be too cowardly, too timid, every time I will take him to a place where there are many children, encourage him, let him play with those children, at first he was unwilling, I accompanied him, and then slowly became bolder, and was willing to make friends, sometimes I will tell me: Mom, I have made a new friend today, and will also teach other children not to hit people and grab toys, but also learned to share, more and more courageous, and more and more lively and cheerful, Until now, you still know how to discuss things with me, and you are very considerate of people; Parents should guide their children slowly, encourage them more, take them out to play more, let them make more friends, and play some projects to exercise their courage; Increasing children's courage requires the perseverance and patience of parents.
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Parents still need to encourage their babies, and many times they need to take their babies to try more opportunities, so that they can become more confident, learn to be brave, and learn to express themselves.
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In this society of the jungle, cowardly children are destined to be hurt more, after all, school violence and wolf workplace are the real society, so we parents need to cultivate their children's brave and decisive character from an early age. However, most parents think very comprehensively about their children's education, and they can't take care of their children in a 360-degree envelope, which undoubtedly weakens the child's ability to survive the fittest.
Most of the parents of the 70s and 90s generation have one thing in common: strong and controlling. After all, parents at this stage have just come out of the "obedient" thinking of the past, what do they obey?
Obedience to the leader, it can be said that this generation has just developed an emancipatory mindset, a feeling of "turning over the serf and singing", and often the urgent need to control everything that belongs to them, including children.
It's not really a problem with any one person, it's something that most of our generation share: a strong desire to control. And the controlled child lacks the right to choose, many times is "obedient" to the parents to live, that is, we often say no character, just imagine, how many opportunities can children who are habitually obedient be brave?
Many parents can be said to have dedicated their lives to their children, in order to let their children live in the "ivory tower", they have arranged everything for their children, and hope that their children will be happy every day.
Parents often beat their children, children naturally dare not fight back, cowardly beaten, scolded, children growing up in this environment with an inferiority complex in their bones, this kind of damage is irreparable.
Many parents love to cry poverty to their children, thinking that this is a good way to cultivate their children to be diligent and thrifty, we can be materially poor, but we must not be spiritually poor, why do you say that? Some parents think that their families are poor, and they will deliberately emphasize that they should not provoke those rich children, and they will also tell their children "the different social treatment brought about by the gap between the rich and the poor", this kind of education is to tell children to learn to tolerate, but most of the children's forbearance methods are reflected in "cowardly avoidance", so insistent children, the character must be cowardly.
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Frequent abuse of children, very strict management of children, do not let children have their own ideas, do not let children have their own opinions, do not let children contact with the outside world.
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Parents always take care of their children's affairs, always unconditionally tolerate children, there are no rules, parents always spoil children, and are particularly good to children, children's ability to resist frustration will be particularly weak, and when the child grows up, the child's character will become very weak.
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For example, parents are usually very strong, or excessively interfere with some of their children's thoughts and decisions, or often quarrel and fight in front of their children, or often beat and scold their own children. These behaviors can make the child's personality very weak.
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Intruder children can only communicate slowly and shyly with others, but shy children do not even dare to refuse to communicate with others. In this way, there will be some obstacles. When children grow up, it is difficult to integrate into society, it is difficult to get along with others, and they are not sure what to do, so they lose out on many opportunities.
Give their children cavity dust a safer future that can change their lives. How to raise a timid child?
A child's cowardice is a heart condition for many parents. Timid children do not believe in themselves, are always in a state of great depression, are poorly adapted, overly cautious, and have a lack of security. This will have a significant negative impact on children's lives, learning and future careers.
Through communication and feedback with their contemporaries, children can consciously imitate the personality traits of others. Parents should let their children have more contact with brave buddies and let them exercise in play.
Children who grow up in cowardice tend to be very sensitive. Because they are timid, their psychological endurance is very poor. As a result, they will have some unhappiness and pain, which will lead them to excessive basic judgment, suspicion that they are being ridiculed, doubted, and despised by the bend.
As a result, it can also lead to extreme behaviors in children. It's certainly not good that children are so obsessed and even sick. Uncertain children have the ability to show it, which increases their confidence in themselves and becomes confident.
After receiving affirmation, children will be more courageous and generous in their dealings with others.
If children really can't get rid of their bad character, we don't have to worry too much. At the moment, cowardice is their weakness for children, yes, but it's not theirs. If you apply your cowardly personality correctly, you will reap unexpected rewards at some point.
Every child is the fruit of the love of the couple. Children inherit not only the strengths of their parents, but also their disadvantages. Whatever a child is, it's our child.
Let go of all expectations of your child, accept your child's imperfections, let your child feel the unconditional love of their parents, and then give them wings of freedom.
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Parents need to encourage their children, especially in front of many people, to praise the baby, so that he can become particularly brave.
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Parents should not control their children too strictly, interfere in everything, and scold him at every turn, so that after a long time, the child will become timid and afraid. Parents should praise them in a timely manner, and if they encounter something that they will not do, they should guide them correctly.
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We take our children to go to more public places to guess together, let them make more friends, accompany children and accompany children to travel, register more interest classes for children, and most importantly, as parents, we must play more with our children, so that the royal shed type can overcome children's cowardice.
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Parents should take their children to do more adventurous sports, cultivate the courage of children, take their children out more, observe the world chain, let children speak, and build self-confidence.
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Many parents suffer from the harm of thousands of years of thinking such as "learning and excellence", thinking that children only need to learn textbook knowledge well, and everything else is basically meaningless, so that the future can have the dream of a good job, have a good life and a happy life, but do not know that this concept has long been adopted, the concept must keep up with the progress of society to work and live stronger. In fact, parents should not only care about their children's ranking, but also pay attention to their children's psychological growth and future character, which will be more important to his future life. Children's psychological growth is largely affected by the daily behavior of parents, as the saying goes, "dragons give birth to dragons, phoenixes give birth to phoenixes, rat children will open holes" is what it means, these points of parents can easily lead to children with weak personalities, easy to be bullied when they grow up, but if you are one of these parents, please correct them in time.
1. Make decisions for your children.
We parents not only have the responsibility of raising children, but also the responsibility of educating children culturally, and when the child is a little older, we have to make him learn to make his own choices, which will be of great benefit to the child, so that he can slowly learn better and more and more assertive. If parents decide everything and do not pay attention to their children's thoughts and experiences, it will also make children develop the character of being weak and dependent on others, and they will not have the mentality and impulse to do things positively.
2. Husbands and wives often argue.
If the husband and wife often fight and make trouble, and the daily life is not harmonious, it will inevitably be for the child, and the child will realize that the home is not a safe harbor, but an area full of indifference and violence, which will be very bad for the child's psychological growth, so that the child has no sense of security and sensitivity, and is unwilling to deal with many things when he grows up, resulting in a cowardly personality.
3. Replace everything for your child.
The development of the child is a whole process of all-round psychosomatic development, not only need to learn textbook knowledge, but also should learn the professional skills of independent bending life and doing things, which will be very beneficial to the child's future life and work.
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