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When the person you like gets married, learning to let go is actually a relief for yourself. Since you are married, it is already a real loss for yourself. If you don't know how to realize yourself in the face of such feelings, you will definitely be hurt emotionally.
When you learn how to let go, you will find that in the rest of your life, you will definitely meet someone you like more, or someone who is more suitable.
1. Don't pursue your own feelingsIf it's not your own feelings, don't pursue it. Feelings that don't belong to you definitely can't be obtained. No matter how hard you ask, you can't get the feelings you want.
Only by doing a good job of yourself and truly finding your own feelings can it be good for yourself.
Second, be responsible for your own feelings, and you will have betterTake responsibility for your own feelings and you will have better. Everyone needs to be responsible for their own feelings, because things like feelings can affect their lives. If you know how to take responsibility for your feelings, you will be able to experience less pain.
Once a person is responsible for his feelings, nothing can affect him.
3. Choose the relationship that suits you, and you will be happyChoose the relationship that suits you, and you will be happy. You must choose the relationship that suits you and the relationship that suits you, so that you can truly experience what happiness is. Because it suits you, never worry about whether it will hurt you.
You will only find out when you find a relationship that really suits you. The feelings that have been lost are not important things.
Feelings that don't belong to you, don't cling to a relationship again. It doesn't belong to you, no matter how attached you are, you can't get it in your heart. A person who is too attached to feelings will not let himself get the feelings that truly belong to him.
Because I am too persistent and don't know how to let go, what I bear in my heart will always be pain.
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In fact, if you want to return to your own life, you should let go of everything you did before and start over, so that you can have a new self.
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Now that they are married, you should focus on your career, constantly improve yourself, make your career have great development, and then find or start another relationship of your own.
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You must tell yourself that other people's lives are someone else's, and you must also face your own future life, and you can return to your own life when you figure it out.
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Now that the other party already has their own family, they should no longer bother others, and they should start a new life and find their own love.
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You must look forward and tell yourself that you can make your life better by forgetting all the things you have done before.
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Let yourself go, tell yourself to stop paying attention to that person, to look forward and make yourself live better.
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Then let yourself let go of this relationship, and gradually find your own happiness and make yourself happy.
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If your wife is an only child, she can take it home. It's not all yours sooner or later. It's normal for girls to love home, if you say it's a small padded jacket.
Your wife didn't take any money from home, why do you keep thinking about asking your wife to give you the money?! She's letting you see it and take it home, and if you can't see it, you don't have to say anything. It's better to let go a little, as long as the family is harmonious, it is not a big deal to give money to parents.
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Since you want to return to your family, it means that you still love your wife and are still nostalgic for your family, so why hesitate.
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Let it go! You should rest now!
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If you don't have children, you can choose to stay with her.
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It's better to think about nothing and work hard to earn money now and have time to travel and let off steam.
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It's a multiple-choice question! You first have to judge which one is right, and then choose her!
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It is really difficult for a woman to choose to watch her child or go to work after giving birth to a baby, in essence, I am willing to return to the workplace to work, which is far easier than watching children, and can stay away from the smoke of family fire, and is more financially free.
But a lot of the actual situation is very complicated, what do you do when you go to work with your child, miss the time to grow up with him, many experts say that children are best brought up by their parents, I think it really makes sense, my eldest is an example, not that grandparents bring up children are not good, and you have not met strange grandparents, this world is full of wonders, after marriage I am considered to be a long knowledge.
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From the perspective of a mother, you should take care of your child at home for three years after giving birth, because the child at this time is the most inseparable from her mother's arms.
As a member of the family, especially the other half of the family, for most families, the economy is one of the most important measures of happiness, after the child is weaned, you can return to the workplace to share the pressure for the husband;
As a modern woman's point of view, you should return to the workplace, you are married, and you have changed from a girl to a woman, and then a mother, but you should not be out of touch with society because of the change of identity, and returning to the workplace is one of the important channels to establish contact with society.
I think the above three points are enough to explain the decision of most women.
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Men are not praying mantises, and they will die immediately if they don't get married. Why is it only a woman who has to choose between going home with her children or working to support her family? All matters of the family should be resolved between the two of them, especially in the area of childcare.
Before getting married, it is necessary to clearly discuss the distribution of family responsibilities after marriage and the arrangements for future childbearing. Instead of waiting for the child to be born and then bothering about whether or not the woman should go home and take the child.
No one can guarantee that their jobs will always be secured, and there is a possibility that their own business will go bankrupt, and civil servants may become temporary workers at any time. So it's troublesome to change the bad habits of the male protagonist and the female protagonist, otherwise it is not impossible for the whole family to sleep on the street without three meals one day due to an accident. Both men and women have jobs to at least share the financial pressure on the family, and in case of accidents, the family's financial situation does not collapse.
The key is that even if you are very busy at home with your children, even if the Internet is developed now, most of the people who stay at home are extremely easy to be disconnected from society, and it is easy to have a huge gap with the other half who works outside. It is not uncommon for people at home to think that people at work are fishing, and people at home think that they continue to complain to each other on a busy day.
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There are at least two ways to consider this
1. For individual women, the period from childbirth to nursing can be equivalent to a period of disconnection from society. There is an old saying that "one pregnancy is stupid for three years" can also be regarded as an explanation of the disconnection from society. Although the development of communication technology can reduce the degree of disconnection, society is the result of everyone's participation, in other words, the society acquired and perceived by communication technology is someone else's society, and one's own society needs to be involved.
2. For the child, although the newborn seems to be an independent individual, the dependence on the mother (the mother here generally refers to the generation of immediate relatives related to the child) is related to the child's future growth, which is a subtle process.
It is worth noting that the care of children is in principle a common obligation of both parents, but it is a question of how the father and mother in each family play this role well. But many people will accidentally push the obligation to care for their children directly onto the mother's side.
So to sum up, choosing to be a housewife is a manifestation of responsibility for future generations; Choosing to return to the workplace is a kind of responsibility to your family and yourself.
As for the trade-off, my personal recommendation is to go with family members (in this case, family membersLimited to the first generation of immediate family members associated with the childThe principle of joint deliberation, after the opinions are agreed, the specific decision is made.
Anyway, hope it helps.
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Hello and thanks for the question.
In Zhao Liying's TV series, there is a line that is very right, this world is too difficult for women.
It was difficult for women in ancient times, and it is even more difficult for women in modern times.
The economic base determines the superstructure.
If you don't return to the workplace, you won't have the economy and lose your independent family status.
If they do not return to the workplace, women will lose their way forward and cannot keep up with each other's footsteps, which will lead to an unstable foundation, a loss of center of gravity in the balance of marriage, and an unstable marriage.
If you don't return to the workplace, you will be separated from society, people are social animals, you will become more and more dependent on the existing family, and even prone to a series of problems such as domestic violence, which is easy to cause physical and mental harm.
To sum up, women should return to the workplace, regain their self-confidence, and be independent women in the new era, even if there are any changes, they are still independent individuals. As for the children, it is possible to hire a babysitter.
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I just happened to watch this movie, so let's talk about my thoughts.
Families with economic foundation or people with particularly strong abilities can make reasonable arrangements for work and life. For example, Zhu Min is a mother, I think she is a failed woman, her family is rich, she can find a nanny, find a less intensive job by herself, or further her education. Usually have a certain amount of time to spend with children, and you can also keep yourself out of touch with society.
People need to be aware of adversity, and they may have a smooth road in life, but they must still have the strength to resist wind and rain.
Ordinary families may indeed be entangled, but be clear! The important point is that my current family situation, my financial situation, I can only make an imperfect decision! Then there is no way, there is no better choice, do your best, and listen to the destiny of God.
I think most women in Chinese families are faced with such a choice, there is no absolutely right choice, only the right choice for their family.
Of course, I really think it's risky for women to give up their jobs for a long time.
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Women have children is the only way for every woman, and it is very likely that the matter of having a child will affect you, of course, this impact is not necessarily a bad influence, but it may also have a good impact.
As a working person, first of all, you can't position yourself as a special group, and don't expect the company to give any preferential treatment to working mothers themselves, because the company is not a charity. The more others think that you are stupid for three years, the more you must maintain your due enthusiasm for work and show a positive work outlook.
Every woman should choose the way back to the workplace according to her actual situation, her educational level, her major, and her strengths. If you can be a housewife, you should not be too young and should not choose an industry that you are not familiar with, because they are not as motivated as young girls who have just graduated, and they can't afford to spend time.
Women should have their own careers!
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It's definitely going back to the workplace!
I believe that most of the families are still ordinary. It is necessary to compromise with real life. So after I got married, my feeling now is that I want to have a stable job or a stable income at any time.
This is not only a responsibility for the family, but also a cultivation of one's own confidence. Work income can make you confident, live a wonderful life, and have a certain right to speak.
After getting married, having a child, I will definitely go to work after a while! That's for sure!
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Since ancient times, China has had the habit of teaching each other husband and child, and the mother follows the child. But this can also be regarded as feudal thinking. So whether to be a stay-at-home mom or return to the workplace is a choice that needs to be weighed.
First of all, whether the mother values the time with the baby in the early years, if you attach great importance to the emotional cultivation during this time, you can choose to stay at home first, but my personal experience feels that the child has no memory of this time, so there is no need for special accompaniment, see each other every day, ta will be intimate with you, not to mention breastfeeding, this is a very good activity to enhance intimacy.
Then, consider your ability to make money when you return to the workplace, if it is far more than hiring a good nanny, you would rather go to work and then hire a nanny, professional things will be done by professionals, the mother is new (unless you are a multi-child mother, then you don't need to ask this question), you need to slowly accumulate experience, the hardcore nanny is ready-made, and her ability is much stronger than you, a new mother. If you can't make money and hire a nanny, you can completely let go of your job, grow up with your child, and accumulate more ability to be a mother in the process, which will definitely bring you a lot of benefits to your child's education after school in the future. Remember, don't leave your child to your parents, their doting will make you regret it in the future, but you can't change it.
Finally, whether you are with your children, or return to the workplace, you must leave enough time to accompany them, if your return to the workplace means that you leave the shopkeeper, and you can't even see the child, then you are advised to stay with the child, after all, the child is only one child, and you, as the only mother, should not be missing.
Purely personal opinion, I think my family basically still takes care of the children by themselves, but my grandparents still help a lot, but there are also a lot of unfortunate helps, hahaha, complain, I hope you like my point of view.
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