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First of all, help your child realize that lying will not succeed, and even if he is deceived, it will only be temporary. Honesty will reduce the punishment for his mistakes, and lying will be punished more severely. At the same time, the child's honest behavior should be encouraged and rewarded in a timely manner.
Second, teach your child with positive words, noting the difference between "a child who lies is a bad child" and "it's important to tell the truth." When we convey information to our children in positive language without losing authority, they don't feel blamed anymore. On the contrary, dissipating rhetoric can make children feel badly labeled and cause them to hide their bad behavior later on.
Again, when a child tells the truth, there needs to be appropriate praise. When your child admits that he has done something wrong, he should be praised by you for his honesty: "You shouldn't play with a vase as a toy, and I hope you don't do that again."
But I'm glad you told me the truth. Of course, you also have to make him understand that telling the truth does not mean that the mistakes he makes are allowed.
In short, in dealing with the rebellious period of children lying, parents must take it seriously and treat, at the same time, if you are not clear, you can also consult Henan Kezhen Education Technology ****, the company is a consulting agency focusing on the study of adolescent mental health, not only has a strong theoretical foundation, experienced full-time psychological counseling expert team, and has a national certified psychological counselor certificate to serve the first service guidance, and then, fast, professional, all-round help parents and children out of the predicament, Escort the physical and mental health of teenagers.
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Normally, children will lie when they are three years old, it's just that you don't know so much, and it doesn't matter. Adolescence is rebellious, and now he is self-aware.
You need to identify yourself, your status at home, among your classmates, and in society, don't force him, help him identify himself, there are some things to lead him to do, support him to do it, and it is not a bad thing to hit a wall, encourage him to move forward. In fact, there are some things he doesn't tell his parents anymore, don't panic, believe that he has his own opinions, and not interfering with him doesn't mean that he doesn't care, observe. My niece is a good friend of the second year of junior high school, she used to talk about everything, and now she has a lot of little secrets, but she understands the reason, that is, I said it, she will go through her brain, and then you can see her changes.
I'm sure your child is the same, maybe the parents say that he will be resistant, then the uncle, aunt, big brother and sister who are closer to him will say that it will work. Don't worry too much, your over-worrying is not good for the child, he will feel that his parents do not trust him, force him or something. If you have time to take him out for a spring outing, it will be beneficial to play, and take the initiative to get close
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Talk to him well and find out why he is lying. For example, he tricked your school into paying you money, and the school confiscated the money at all. At this time, you have to reflect on whether the usual pocket money is really less, or whether the child is in trouble outside, or whether he has any bad habits.
Communication, finding the root cause, and making children trust you can really solve the problem. In fact, today's children are very reasonable, and he also has his difficulties.
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It's normal to have a generation gap, my mother is the same with my brother, don't care too much, don't look at him too closely, he has his own ideas and space, don't interfere with him too much, of course, laissez-faire is not good, managing people also depends on the character, introverted children, can not always hit his self-confidence, extroverted children, please be not as good as agitated, the best family is a more loose and tight, generally the mother is more gentle, the father is more strict, (my family is like this, I don't know if your family is like this.) Hehe.
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Every child has a rebellious period, which is normal, as long as you don't learn badly, don't interfere too much with him, it may backfire.
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Don't always lecture him, be patient and reason with him, and you can take him to watch more educational movies.
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Parents are very concerned about their children, because parents also hope that their children can be better, but parents must pay more attention to their children in life, because at this time children are also very prone to problems, and the characteristics of each child are also different. The child is a junior high school student, but the child is very rebellious and likes to lie, how will you educate the child at this time?
Parents pay a lot of attention to children, because parents also hope that their children can be better, but everyone also knows that children are also very prone to problems at this time, and at this time children are facing more environments, so children are particularly vulnerable to the external environment, parents must do a good job of guidance at this time. If your child is particularly fond of lying, then parents must tell their children that lying is a bad habit, and never let your child develop a bad habit of lying.
But parents should not directly use theories to preach at this time, because at this time children will not listen to them at all, and if your child is in a rebellious period, then at this time children may have some prejudice against their parents, because children may feel that their parents are very nagging. Therefore, you may find that there are often disputes between children and their parents, and children will become very sensitive at this time. Parents must pay attention to the use of methods at this time, and parents can use the examples around them to educate their children.
These issues are necessary for parents to pay attention to, because parents' educational methods are very helpful for children's development. If parents can adopt the right way to educate their children, then you may find that children will become very good at this time, and the relationship between children and parents will also become very good.
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At this time, I will tell the child that it is not right to lie, and also tell the child the truth of the facts, so that the child knows that he has seen through his lie, understands the child's inner thoughts, and helps the child solve the difficulties, so as to avoid the problem of the child lying.
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I will tell my child not to lie, and then when he lies, I will definitely criticize him, and I will also punish him, because he is now a junior high school student and understands some truth. Therefore, if it is useless to preach, you must punish the child in a way that is afraid, so that they will not do it again.
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Grasp the child's behavior and personality characteristics, analyze the problem, and educate and persuade with emotion and reason.
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Junior high school students belong to adolescence, and their thoughts and psychology are changing, their thoughts are immature, their emotions are unstable, and they are more rebellious. Therefore, it is normal for children in this period to lie, and parents should treat it correctly. What is the psychology behind lying in junior high school students?
First of all, there is the rebellious mentality. As soon as a child enters middle school, he or she will break through the way of thinking in childhood.
They have independent personalities and thoughts. They begin to try to break free from the control of their parents and teachers and handle their own affairs independently. Emotionally and academically, they have to rely on their parents and teachers and are not free to control their time, behavior and life, which constitutes an intricate state of contradictions and conflicts in their hearts, which makes them prone to lying.
Secondly, it is to seek profit and avoid disadvantages. Some middle school students lie to avoid responsibility and protect themselves. For example, some children skip classes because they don't want to go to school.
Once discovered by the teacher, they will lie to avoid the teacher's investigation in order to achieve the purpose of self-protection. There are also children who do not do well in exams and secretly change their grades so as not to be punished by their parents. These are common behaviors among middle school students.
Again, friend loyalty. Most of these ** will not make mistakes, but if it is their good friend who makes the mistake, and they are very aware of the course of events, they will lie for their friend in order to protect their friend, or to prevent themselves from being ridiculed and isolated by their classmates. Vanity.
Middle school students have a particularly good personality and self-esteem.
It's going to be a lot stronger than before. In particular, some boys especially like to express themselves in front of girls. They do it to satisfy their vanity.
And self-destructing. <>
Finally, the desire to be noticed. Children who have not received the care and attention of their parents for a long time will make the child deliberately lie and want to get the attention of their parents. Some children are more introverted and unsociable, but sometimes lie in order to rule out loneliness and prove their existence.
The above is my question to you: "My child has been lying to me a lot recently, what should I do, and what is the psychology behind the lying of junior high school children?" I hope it can help you.
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The child may feel that his parents are not able to see through the lie, and he may feel that he is very smart.
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Tell your child tactfully and communicate with your child heart-to-heart. Tell him that you already know that he is lying, but don't be too strong, and insist on communicating with him to understand the reason why he is lying.
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Junior high school students often lie, which should be caused by the rebellious psychology of adolescence, with the child's thoughts, we have to communicate more, understand the child's true thoughts, from the code of the quality of the hall to better solve the problem.
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<>1. Parents should not label their children as "love to lie" because of one or two trivial things. This may cause the child to have the psychology of breaking the jar and breaking it. Make lying really a habit. In the long run, the communication between parents and children becomes more and more difficult, and the estrangement is getting deeper and deeper.
2. When dealing with students who often lie, especially when they have not found evidence that can fully prove that the child is lying, do not arbitrarily draw conclusions, and learn to treat them coldly. This is conducive to clarifying the truth of the incident and also helps to avoid blindness in the handling process and arbitrariness in the handling of the results. At this time, parents can do some understanding work, and wait for the notice to have a correct judgment on the lying incident before making conclusions and dealing with it.
3. Lying is also a signal that the child's inner needs are not fully met and the inner feelings are not fully valued. At this time, parents must communicate with their children in a timely manner to understand their thoughts. Understanding and respect are the foundation of good communication, and good communication promotes understanding, which leads to a virtuous circle in the parent-child relationship and a reduction in lying.
4. Parents should lead by example. The educator Makarenko famously said, "Before you ask your friends to educate your children, check your own behavior."
Don't think that you are educating children only when you talk to them, teach them something, or instruct them. How you talk to others, how you talk about others, how you rejoice, how you grieve, how you treat friends, how you treat enemies, how you laugh, how you read newspapers – all of these things have great significance for children. ”
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1. Explain the reason to the child, and do not criticize or scold roughly.
2. Parents should learn to respect their children's opinions.
3. To avoid the misunderstanding of bipolar education, we can not only express our dissatisfaction with our children, but also let our children have the opportunity to express and explain.
4. Pay attention to the timing and skills of emotional communication with children. When communicating with children, don't always rely on academic performance, as this will only make children feel stressed and doubt their parents' motives for communication. When communicating, parents can start with family affairs and talk about business after their children's emotions have stabilized.
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Parents should respect, democratize, equalize, and trust their children, give their children enough space to grow, give them the right to be independent and choose, and at the same time give their children responsibilities to be loose on the outside and tight on the inside. When children are young, parents are accustomed to being at the front desk, directing their children's growth; As the child grows older, parents should move behind the scenes and let the child perform on stage. Ruoshui Education is the first education base in China where professional psychology teachers and children eat and live together, and the education base has more than 20 national senior psychological counselors in the school for a long time, as well as hundreds of experts from the Ruoshui Education Research Institute to provide support, professionally solve the problems of teenagers' rebellion, school weariness, Internet addiction, early love, low self-esteem, autism and other problems.
Ruoshui Education Base also does online counseling for rebellious children. The name of the online is: Wakasui Education Research Institute.
Under the leadership of Xu Ruoshui, Dean of Ruoshui Education Research Institute, combined with decades of work experience, the online family education course has studied a large number of books from ancient and modern China and foreign countries, carefully analyzed the various problems of parents and children, as well as the root causes of school boredom, and created a series of professional courses and targeted solutions. Of course, there are also offline schools. [Click to view the official**].
Ruoshui Education Base enlightens young people with the wisdom of life with Chinese classics; To cultivate young people with the wisdom of sages and sages to be knowledgeable, rational and develop good habits; Cultivating young people's physical fitness and good conduct through both civil and military training; Train and cultivate young people's strong will and feelings for their family and country with military simulations; With the correct knowledge and mindfulness of "reading for the sages" and "reading for the rise of China", we should correctly guide young people to be diligent in reading and have the courage to forge ahead.
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