How will you get along with your children when you get old?

I don't know about others, but when I'm old,I will definitely be the kind of old man who does not cause trouble to my children, and I will definitely try not to get involved in the affairs of my childrenAfter all, I also came from this age, and I know that there is a big gap between the ideas of the old and the young, so in order to avoid annoying the children, I will choose not to mix with their things, so that it is the best for me and for the children. <>

I believe that when I say this, there will be many old people who will come out to refute meBecause in their eyes, everything they do is for the good of their children. Indeed, I can't deny the hard work of these old people, but the old people should think carefully before doing these things, are you doing all this what the child wants? Sometimes it is really good to do bad things, when we are old, the children have grown up, they already have a clear view of right and wrong, they know what to do.

Moreover, the times are constantly advancing, and the development of all aspects is very fast, and when we get old, we may not be able to keep up with the development of the times, and then it is very likely that we will become a backward old man, if we use our backward thinking to limit the behavior of children, this is not harmful to children! Therefore, for the elderly, it is best not to meddle in the affairs of children, they can decide their own lives, if they need our help, we can help them, but when they do not have this need, we can live our own livesThis will not worry you and will not turn your child off. <>

Other than that, I might choose to live alone, after all, the children have their own jobs to keep busyIf I wasn't old enough to take care of myself, I would never trouble my children, after all, their lives are not easy, and I can find less trouble for them, and live alone is also free, do whatever you want, and are not constrained by others. In short, I will be a very independent old man, an old man who will not let his children worry about it!

If the child needs it, keep the space distance together, and the child is independent, keep the time interval together!

Children under the modern education system are independent and self-reliant, and they have problems to solve on their own. So when I get old, I won't be like my predecessors, I want to live with my children, help them take their children to cook, I will go out to travel, take a walk around the great rivers and mountains of the motherland, take a look at the ethnic customs of various places, and when I am tired and can't walk, I will find a nursing home, and quietly spend that little time in my old age. If the child really has any difficulties that are difficult to solve, we still have to give full play to the residual heat, help solve it, and try to only contribute money and not people in life, after all, children and grandchildren have children and grandchildren, and we should not participate.

When I am old, I will get along with my children as equals, and I will explain my needs directly to my children, so that my children will not guess their parents' thoughts, and I will point out their shortcomings, and I will also ask my children to put forward their own ideas.

During this time, the news of a 79-year-old mother buried alive appeared on the mobile phone repeatedly, and I once saw an old news that the children and their parents were only a few streets away, and the parents died at home for many days, and the first thing they found was the neighbor who smelled the odor. How sad it is to raise children and daughters who have worked hard all their lives, but when they are dying, they are so undignified! These phenomena made me think:

When people are old, they should compete for how to get along with their children in order to have a good death. ”

The closest person is the children, although the "pension" solves the economic problem of the old-age, so that the "raising children to prevent old age" has become a thing of the past, the elderly can live independently and independently, and they do not want to trouble their children more and more, and the children seem to be very relieved of their parents, and they are used to not often asking Hou to care about their parents. In the long run, the spiritual connection between parents and children will become less and less, and eventually it is possible to become "strangers".

The elderly can walk and be able to move when they are filial, but when they are old, they will one day get sick and unable to move, and they will have to rely on people. Either be taken care of by your children or have someone else take care of you. There shouldn't be much that children can take care of, and after all, they have a lot of their own affairs.

If you have the conditions, you can ask someone to take care of them at home, or send them to a nursing home with good conditions, but what if you don't?

As the saying goes: "There is no filial son in front of the bed for a long time", like the one who buried his mother alive may be willing to take care of him at first, but after a long time, he becomes impatient, and he has no conditions to ask someone to take care of him, and finally competes to the point of losing his humanity. This kind of thing is rarely heard of, but parents and children are close to each other, and parents die at home many days before being discovered, but I have heard a lot, and their children are often blamed by relatives, and I believe that children must also feel guilty.

So what can be done to prevent this from happening? When parents are healthy, they will try their best not to trouble their children in life, and when their children are in need, they should try their best to care for and help their children; Children should not be ignored just because their parents can take care of themselves. If you don't live together, you need to care for each other mentally, keep in touch diligently, even if you send a WeChat message to ask each other every day, form a habit, and once there is an abnormality, you can find the problem in time, so as not to leave irreparable regrets.

Grandma, what's wrong? My dad said that you are the most open-minded, and you are ahead of your time, how can you bother with this problem?

2. Gossip less and gossip less; Try to be more tolerant and understanding of your children, and even if you find that your children are not satisfied with some aspects, do not always criticize and blame them.

3. Do not make excessive demands on children; Try not to make excessive demands on them, and know how to make concessions in terms of money, so as not to cause too much financial pressure on your children.

4. Appropriately share housework and decompose children's pressure; Modern society is very stressful, children work under pressure, parents can share some housework within their ability, and children will appreciate your efforts.

More understanding, more enlightenment, more care.

As the saying goes, "if there is an old man in the family, there is a treasure", but if there are old people in the family, it is also a few happy and a few sad. Children and the elderly live under the same roof and get along for a long time, and there will inevitably be some small contradictions and small frictions at the starting point. In this regard, experts remind that when the elderly get along with their children, they should try their best to avoid rumors, suspicion, favoritism, arbitrariness, pickiness, indifference, competition for money, accommodation, extremism, and nagging, so that they can live happily together.

First of all, the old man treats his son, daughter-in-law, and son-in-law equally, and does not favor one over the other. Secondly, the elderly should not talk about the younger generation among relatives and friends. And don't spread the word among your children, so as not to misinform and cause conflicts.

Don't chase after the wind. It's better to talk about things in person, not behind your back; When in doubt, ask in person, don't guess. The old man should be a guide and counselor, do not act arbitrarily and alone, and do not look at the interests and hobbies of his children with old ideas and old eyes, as long as it does not hinder social morality, he must not be picky.

The old man with a wide heart and a sweet mouth, who rejoices and follows his fate, is the most popular among his children. Elderly people should be kind to their children. Don't always put on the dignity of an elder and keep a straight face all day long.

However, we should not blindly tolerate and accommodate the shortcomings and mistakes of our children. Be calm when encountering problems, and do not criticize or teach lessons about what your children do. Otherwise, your child will be emotionally alienated from you, or will speak out.

Don't worry about money with your children. Be patient with your children about things they don't understand. Criticize what you do wrong, and avoid endless nagging.

In addition to the above taboos, the elderly should try to maintain a positive attitude, expand their life circle, and not rely too much on their children. Of course, when children get along with their parents, they should also be more considerate of them, talk to them more, and don't be annoyed by the elderly, so that it is the real filial piety.

How should older people get along with their children? Remember these 8 don'ts! Be sure to take it to heart.

When people reach old age, their children are filial, and living happily is the greatest happiness, so that they can enjoy their old age in peace.

Therefore, in our daily life, we must know how to properly communicate with our children, so that we can better maintain family affection, and we should pay attention to the following points in communication:

1.Keep your profile down when communicating.

I'm right", this attitude will only lead to the deterioration of the communication relationship and make it impossible for communication to continue. When communicating, it is best to keep your profile as low as possible, that is, to fully respect the opinions of the other party, and to express your opinions and opinions appropriately and not excessively. Even if you think that your statement is not wrong or there is a problem with the other party's opinion, you should first listen to the other party's words, different people have different ideas, the ability to express and understand is also different, there may be the other party's expression mistakes or their own understanding is biased, you should lower your posture and listen patiently.

2.Don't get emotional.

When communicating, it is important to keep a calm mind and not be emotional. Emotionally charged may make communication stuck halfway and unable to communicate, and even lead to abandonment and failure of communication. If you feel particularly irritable and restless in the process of communication because of your emotions, you will have to stop communicating and wait for a period of time to calm down before you can continue to communicate, which will actually make all parties in the communication unhappy.

3.Communicate with respect.

Unnecessary self-esteem can only be a stumbling block to communication, so at the very least, you should be respectful when communicating. Don't say "My self-esteem won't allow me to ......In that case, it will only make communication impossible.

4.Be open and honest in your communication.

In the process of communication, it is very important to learn to be honest with each other, do not hide it, honesty is an important step for you to deepen the cooperative relationship through communication. First of all, you can make the other party believe in yourself through your own honesty, and then drive the other party to be honest with you, and then promote the smooth and happy communication.

5.State your reasons clearly.

No matter why, how, what the reason is, etc., you must fully explain to the other party, even if there is no reason to act, you must inform the other party of your own considerations and ideas, and get the other party's understanding and action support will be of good help to the development of communication and the development of future cooperation.

What should we do when we are old and our children don't like us?

How do we deal with our children when we are about to get old, learn to do the following points, even in old age, we can still live comfortably, live chic, and live with dignity!

First, remember: being old is not a cost.

Everything is worth a little in these years, but years are not worth much.

Don't have so many "shoulds" or "shouldn'ts" in your heart. The older you get, the more steady you should be. Someone calls you "old gentleman" and "old grandma" outside, which is the other party's choice.

Young people use their strength to take the lead, that is biological instinct; If someone gives you a seat, then you must remember to say "thank you", and don't rely on the old to sell the old.

Second, remember: "thinking about the past" is not a word that everyone likes to hear.

This is not the time to remember bittersweet memories, and no one wants to enjoy your glorious history and ups and downs.

After all, the times are different, and the wild vegetables you have eaten have now become high-end dishes; You have cultivated the land, and now you have become the destruction of the ecology.

The story of the Red Army boiling a belt to satisfy hunger made young people unable to understand that cooking a belt now is not as economical as stewing a few catties of meat.

Therefore, the topic of "thinking about the past" should be stopped in moderation, after all, "back then" is not as practical as "today".

Third, remember: be nosy, especially the "idle business" at home

The education of your grandchildren is your child's business, not your responsibility. When getting along with children, we must not chatter, we must have a sense of the position of the "CPPCC", and we must not be in place, but we must not overstep or misplace.

Make a statement on major events, don't care if you don't listen. Your children ask for your opinion to be respectful, and you should take the initiative to pursue a leisurely life.

When you are old, you have to worry less about other people's affairs and don't worry about God's affairs. Having time and leisure to worry more about yourself is the right way.

Making friends and saving for friendship is what seniors should do as soon as possible. When you can no longer play and move around, you can still give new and old friends a ** to exchange your favorite topics.

Keep your wife, old book, old nest and old friends, and at the same time have your own interests and pursuits, so that your old life will be colorful.

First of all, we should not nag our children too much, and secondly, we should learn new things, understand their preferences and talk to them about fashion issues.

Maintain communication and do not interfere with children's freedom. If you know how to respect your child, your child will naturally respect you, don't be a drag bottle, and take care of yourself.

Those who can rely on themselves are on themselves. Really, because children also have a lot of their own things to do, so for the sake of family harmony, you can rely on yourself within your own ability.