What you can t say in real life, why can t you tell the truth in life?

Focus on these four areas.

The first is to avoid privacy.

Privacy is certain situations that cannot be disclosed or do not have to be disclosed, some are flawed, some are secret. In a highly civilized society, privacy does not have to be known to the general public, except for a few interested persons who must know it. Therefore, avoiding talking and asking about privacy in verbal communication is an important aspect of politeness.

Europeans and Americans generally do not ask each other about their age, occupation, marriage, income, etc., otherwise it will be considered very impolite.

The second is to avoid shallowness.

Shallowness refers to not knowing how to pretend to understand, "teaching others" or speaking layman's language, or not being able to speak righteousness, not knowing knowledge, only knowing firewood, rice, oil and salt, chickens, pigs, cats and dogs, Zhang Chang and Li short, men and women marry. The rhetoric is monotonous, the vocabulary is poor, the sentences are incomprehensible, and the white characters are often spit out. If the shallow meet and do not feel shallow, but the educated and knowledgeable people listen to their conversation, they will undoubtedly feel unhappy.

Society and nature are oceans of knowledge, and it is impossible for each of us to be a universal doctor or a jack of all trades. We should be specialized and knowledgeable, but there are always things that are inferior to others, there are always things that we don't understand a certain kind of knowledge, we should be modest and cautious, and we should not make arbitrary comments.

The third is to avoid vulgarity.

Vulgarity refers to rude language, even filth, full of foul language, ugly words, and swear words, going back to ancestors, sisters, descendants, and both sexes, which is unbearable. Vulgar language is the most impolite language. It is the contamination of a national language.

The fourth is to avoid taboos.

Taboo is the phenomenon, thing and behavior that human beings regard as taboo, and the language that avoids taboo has a conventional correspondence with the words it replaces. The common avoidance language in society is also an important polite language in society, which often takes into account the feelings of the other party and avoids breaking taboos. Here are some important types of avoidances:

The first is the avoidance of words that denote things that are fearful. For example, there are quite a lot of evasive words about "death", even things related to "death" should also be avoided, such as "coffin" saying "longevity material", "longevity board", etc. The second is the avoidance of the physical defects of the other party and the person concerned.

For example, people with serious physical defects are now commonly referred to as "disabled", which is a relatively elegant avoidance. Finally, it is a shy away from the words of morality, customs, and behaviors that cannot be disclosed. For example, going to the toilet to urinate is called "going to the bathroom".

It's better not to ask people how much they are paid, and how old the women are.

And don't give people nicknames, or say that so-and-so you look like something or something.

Don't gossip behind other people's backs. If you have an opinion about someone, you should raise it in person.

Do unto others as you would have them do to you. If you don't want to hear or answer, don't say or ask what you don't want to answer.

Such as: privacy question, other party's defect question, etc.

Don't say all sorts of disgusting things while others are eating.

the privacy and defects of the other party.

Because the truth is often hurtful. In addition to thinking, people still have emotions, so why should we remove the factor of emotional harm? When you say what you think is the "truth", others may only think about "why can you say it without worrying about my emotions", and what he cares about is not the right or wrong of what you say, but why you don't take his emotions into account.

And a lot of what you think is the "truth", the other party may not actually understand it, or it can be said to be dismissive, but when you actually bring it to the table and tell it, there will be an invisible embarrassment, and most people will choose to change the topic or not to the formal question itself.

Most of us in our lives are hermit crabs who live a difficult life by self-irony, shrinking themselves into the shells of others. Only by constantly complaining about yourself every day to find some self-confidence, and at this time you have to pry open this shell, and then tell others that this is the real you, others are unwilling or even disgusted with your so-called "truth" You are asking, why they are not willing to listen to your truth.

If a person has a dream, but has no talent, or has not yet shown it, then he or she may be considered "unrealistic" by the world.

Therefore, if a person's life is unrealistic, the judgment is the size of the gap between his achievements and his dreams.

To give an inappropriate example: movie stars, especially Hollywood stars, some are artists, some are poets, some are disgusted with commercial films and only want to act in feature films, and some only want to be actors, but they are not evaluated as "unrealistic".

It is because, in the eyes of the world, their talents, money, and social status support "unrealistic" dreams.

Unrealistic is equivalent to bragging to some extent, just listen to it, there is no need to take it seriously, go to the heart.

Some people just like to brag. You just know it. Don't take his words seriously. Don't be serious with him.

Don't worry about some people, they say theirs, you just do it yourself.

What do you think is realistic? Speak up and listen.

Why say realistically?

There are all kinds of people, animals have twelve personalities, and so are people.