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Don't often yell at the child, because often yelling at the child, the child will be very insecure, he feels that no one in this world loves him, every time you coax the child, he will be in a very comfortable mood, but the child will self-deny, just feel why his father or mother does not like him so much, he will deny himself after a long time, so we usually have to praise the child more, don't yell at him and scold him.
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In parent-child communication, we must avoid the impact of language on children's self-confidence, children's self-confidence is very important, good self-confidence can make children have greater self-confidence, whether it is for life or future work will be helpful.
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It's just that some of the more negative energy is really useless, I don't want you anymore, why are you so stupid when you go out, don't follow me anymore, everyone's children are better than you, why are you so bad? Why can't I write well. These are relatively taboo language, which will seriously hurt the child's self-confidence and affect the relationship between parents and children.
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If you want to communicate with your child, you must first have time to communicate. Many parents are so busy with work that they give up communication with their children. The parent's personal behavior is undoubtedly telling the child, "You don't have the key to my job."
How likely is the child to want to communicate with the parent when he or she receives this information?
Many parents are habitually arrogant, subconsciously feel that their children are immature and incapable of working, and are more accustomed to intervening in their children, saying and moving, and coercing, but they are not patient to communicate. As a result, many parents' "communication" is "authoritative": parents assume to speak, children to listen, and ultimately children to do the opposite.
That will only cause the child to close the door of communication and refuse to communicate with the parents.
Epictas: "God has given people one mouth and two ears so that we can hear from others many times more than everyone else can speak. "Communication is mutual, mutual discussion and mutual consultation.
Parents lack the ability to "listen", so in the whole process of communication, children only feel the parents' upset, and in the long run, children are unwilling to "communicate".
Mark Twain: "The mastery of human beings is based on the mind, not the eyes or the intellect." "Communication" builds a highway bridge between the heart and the heart, and clears up the misunderstanding between parents and children.
Reasonable "communication" helps parents build a harmonious parent-child communication, and parent-child communication is the foundation of parenting education.
Parents are right to have their own standards in some issues and decisions, and stick to their own ideas, but this does not mean that they should ignore their children's suggestions, no matter what their suggestions are, so that they can publish them at least two benefits: one is that the child has been asked for advice at least, and he will be more receptive to the best decisions; The second is that it will make the child's self-esteem greatly achieved. Many parents like to "ban" their children on "important" issues, which inhibits the urge to communicate with their parents.
Many children have a dark shadow in their childhood - "other people's children", and almost all of them have seen their parents complaining "It would be nice if you were like so-and-so", "Look at who is in your class", "It's good if you have half of the family". That kind of blind following the trend can only make children less and less confident or more "alone".
Many parents don't understand the big truth that "children's thoughts and opinions are usually different from adults", or call their children's mentality or opinions about something a big fuss. In this way, the child who cannot be understood will have difficulty understanding the good intentions of his parents.
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There are a lot, because there are many sellers who often abuse children when communicating with children, and the sedan chair often complains about children, and is more emotional, and will blame the unhappy things in their lives on the children, and learn to guide the children.
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Don't be too frequent, choose a calm tone when communicating, don't complain and insult the child, be sure to communicate patiently with the child, and lead the child to speak, don't hit the child.
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Don't swear in front of your children, don't compare your own children with other people's children, don't say that your own children can't do it, don't suppress Akira Shino's own children, and don't put too much pressure on your children.
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It is wrong to not pay attention to the way of mating and splitting, not to pay attention to the tone of communication, not to pay attention to the quietness of communication, to often criticize children, and to educate children.
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There are often quarrels, and if you don't understand the child's true thoughts, you will lack the Tongzhi to educate the child when the meal is in the Lunling, and the child is not allowed to go against his will. Will force the child to do something.
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In the process of children's growth, parents play a very important role, in a good educational environment, children can learn more knowledge, but also to establish a good study habits, so parents must strengthen communication with children, so as to understand the child's inner thoughts more clearly, so as to make better guidance. There are no children who can't teach well, only parents who can't teach, especially in the process of children's growth, it is easy to have parent-child communication problems, which affects the feelings of both parties.
Parents should spend more time with their children. Although the society is constantly developing, but the pressure on adults has not decreased, in order to maintain the daily expenses of the family, often go out early and return to work at night, there is not much personal time at all, let alone communicate and communicate with children, which often makes children lack parental care, thus alienating the distance between the two sides, so no matter how busy parents are, they must take a little time to communicate and interact with their children, so as to better understand the situation of children.
Parents must not be high-minded in the form of a match. Although the children are younger, they also want to be respected, so at this time parents should communicate and communicate with their children with an equal attitude, after all, with the continuous development of society, children can also learn a lot of knowledge through the Internet, and in some aspects children may know more than their parents, so parents must not underestimate their children, and usually share and communicate more, which also helps to shorten the distance between each other.
Parents can't educate their children in a way that's too harsh and stupid. Nowadays, children attach great importance to their self-esteem, many parents are very rough when educating their children, so it is easy for children to resist the psychology, so as to gradually distance themselves from their parents, we must set a good example for children, and guide children in a more gentle way, which can make children realize their mistakes, do not let children continue to change themselves, communication is the best way to solve problems.
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When communicating with your child, try to avoid question-based communication, and instead use something like "I guess you played on the slide in kindergarten today?" "This kind of interactive hall is a stupid way to communicate with children, which can allow children to express themselves immersively. Myth 2:
Regardless of the severity of the child's remorse.
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When communicating with children, we must empathize, and at the same time, we should also think about the ways and means of communication from the perspective of children, and when communicating with children, do not force children to do some things, and should go shouting according to children's ideas and concepts, so that we can understand children better, and also know how to educate children, so that the relationship between the two can become better.
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Personal communication is the most important part of the parent-child relationship, because whether the parent-child communication is good or not directly affects the quality of the parent-child relationship. So what should we pay attention to as parents in parent-child communication? Let's get up and take a look.
First of all, it is certainIt is necessary to avoid coercing the child, who is an independent individual, whose will cannot be transferred by our will. If we force our children too much, it will lead to two results, one is that the child will have a rebellious psychology towards the parents, which will lead to more and more difficult communication between parents and children, especially in the child's adolescent years. Another result is that the child becomes more and more dependent on the parents, because the parents always force the child to do a certain thing, and the child is powerless to resist, then the child can only obey the parents, which will make the child gradually lose himself in the process of growing up and become an accessory of the parents.
And secondly, it isTo respect children, we must treat children as equals, and we can't use our identity to suppress children because we are eldersThis can make your child feel pressured during the communication. As a result, our own children are reluctant to communicate with us. At the same time, respect for children should also be reflected in all aspects of small things, not only in the process of communication.
At the same time, don't see respect as humble, we just need to treat them as equals in the process of interacting with children.
And finallyLearn to compromise with your childSometimes children do have more ideas than us in some aspects, and even these ideas are very good, so parents should learn to put down the posture of their children and the so-called elders, and consider their children's ideas or suggestions.
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First of all, we should pay attention to the way we communicate with our children, and at the same time, we should accompany our children more, care more about our children, give them more sense of security, and take our children to participate in more social activities to enhance the relationship between parents and children.
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Pay attention to the attitude of communication, let the child express his emotions, understand the child's psychological thoughts, you must share your feelings, give the child enough time, and learn to listen.
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When communicating with parents, you must pay attention to your attitude, learn to respect your child, and listen to your child's ideas.
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Targeted conversations, don't ignore the topic, pay attention to the choice of words, phrases, and the locale, don't swear words, these questions should be paid attention to.
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When communicating with your child, you should be on an equal footing.
First of all, for parents, when the children communicate, we must ensure that your communication is in an equal position, you must know that in real life, there are many parents in the communication with their children, always a condescending position, and this condescending position is likely to make the child to the parents have a fear of attraction, but also is likely to make their children do things submissively, and then cultivate the child has a cowardly character, And if children have a cowardly character in life, it is very detrimental to their life development.
Be patient when communicating with your child.
The most important thing for parents is to be patient when communicating with their children, because children also have their own ideas and the ability to think about problems on their own, so when parents have a patient attitude when communicating with children, then they can better hear what their children are thinking, so that they can better make their children's understanding of the problem to a higher level, and at the same time, they can also make their children not timid in the process of interacting with others.
When communicating with your child, be sure to pay attention to the way you guide.
In fact, for parents, it is very important to guide when communicating with children, only when parents communicate with their children, pay attention to a suitable guidance method, then they can make children have unique insights into problems and thinking about life, so as to ensure that their children have greater self-confidence on the road of life, and when children have self-confidence, they can better face any problems in the world, and at the same time when exploring the worldThey will also have a greater sense of security, and their lives will become very distant.
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The most important thing to pay attention to in parent-child communication is that two people should communicate equally, and they can't think that their parents are big and powerful, and the children must listen to him, and the two people can't talk too much, and they can't yell at the child.
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In parent-child communication, we must pay attention to the way we usually speak, give children a good example, and do not talk big and nonsense.
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Parents are the guides of children's life on the road, but also the companions of children's growth process, our words and deeds will become the object of children's imitation, and every word we say to children will become a carving knife for carving his character characteristics.
It can be said that the personal character traits of children in the future are established in the words and actions of their parents. Therefore, in the process of parent-child communication with children, parents should carefully consider every word they say and think about whether it will have a positive or negative impact on their children.
Abusive language. These abusive words will only make the child feel more and more inferior, thinking that he is really as unbearable as his parents say. Children who have grown up in such an abusive environment for a long time are likely to have a state of self-abandonment and are unwilling to refute their parents' untrue words in celery.
Unhealthy contrasts. Some parents often compare their children's weaknesses with the strengths of others, which can seriously damage their children's self-esteem and self-confidence, and make them feel inferior. One of the most common behaviors is that parents talk to their children all day long about "other people's children", which not only affects the child's normal classmates at school, but also stimulates the child's jealousy and makes him target "other people's children" everywhere.
Threaten to abandon it. When some parents communicate with their children, they like to use the words "if you are disobedient, you will be thrown away" as a bargaining chip to threaten their children's sensible and obedient words. Although this technique is effective in a short period of time, it does not have a positive effect in the long term.
On the contrary, it will keep the child in a state of mind of suffering from gains and losses, and always worry that he will be abandoned by his parents. There is a risk that the bond between the child and the parent will become weak.
Fail to keep the faith. Lack of faith is the most common problem for parents in the family. They often make promises to motivate children to accomplish their goals.
However, when the child achieves his goal, the parents refuse to fulfill their promises and do not keep their promises. This will greatly erode the child's trust in himself, reduce his prestige, and make the child look down on you.
As parents of children, we must know that these 4 taboos must not be committed in parent-child communication, otherwise it will not only affect the relationship between parents and children, but also affect the harmonious conversation of the family atmosphere. Only by communicating well can we truly enter the hearts of children, understand what children think, and become a qualified parent.
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