How can I not put my parents words at ease

If what you say is true, it's safe to say that your parents' upbringing was just too inappropriate! You ask: How can you not take your parents' words to heart?

So what are the consequences of taking your parents' words to heart? Why do your parents' disappointment in you and their belittlement of you make you so miserable? That's because of their words, which remind you of real-life failures:

The IQ is not high, the grades are not very good, and the students are tired of studying. The idea they instill in you is that if you don't get good grades, you won't be productive, and you should have low self-esteem.

In fact, these should not be a reason for a person's inferiority, what age is this, and your parents' thinking is still so old-fashioned. Nowadays, most of the people who graduated from college come out to help others, but the bosses are those who have not high education but have been in the business world since childhood. As can be seen from what you said:

You are a very hard worker. Since he is a hard-working person, even if he fails, he should be respected by others! At least I admire you.

But there is one question that must be bothering you and becoming an obstacle for you, and that is: why do you try hard but keep failing? You should ask yourself this question, and you may find something that you didn't find before.

Many people encounter the same problem as you: they fail, but they don't know why they failed or how to save them, which is the most tangled. You might be able to ask someone you trust to help you, such as a teacher?

If you can't find it, then you can only endure it for the time being, when you are in adversity, you should learn to survive, you should be self-reliant, do what you can do, as long as you do your best, you are enough to have a clear conscience!

Finally, I would like to send you a word: those who suffer have no right to be pessimistic; In the event of a fire, there is no right to be afraid of the dark; On the battlefield, only warriors who are not afraid of death can achieve victory; Only those who suffer and are not pessimistic can overcome difficulties and get out of trouble!

Hello anonymous friend;

Do you know what the root of your problem is? Your life goals, directions, self-positioning, and evaluation of yourself are not objective. The vast majority come from your parents.

A friend upstairs said it very well. What parents say is not necessarily right. Yes, what the parents said was not right. However, we can't talk back to our parents. So, what do we do?

1 Tell yourself all the time; This is the parents' excessively high requirements for themselves, and this is the parents' harsh requirements for themselves. It's not just that I can't do it; No one else can do it! It's normal that I can't do it. I just have to do what I want to do.

2 Keep reminding yourself; I have my own purpose and direction in life, and I have my own dignity and personality. Others, including my parents, don't respect me, it's their business, and I can't control it. However, I will never allow myself to look down on myself and not allow myself to belittle myself!

Always remind yourself of this and always give yourself the right understanding. Slowly, you will become confident, strong, and optimistic.

Bless you!

There is a story that the hunter caught a young eagle in the eagle's nest and raised it in the chicken coop in the hope that it would become a falcon, and the eagle thought that he was just a strange-looking chicken like the other chickens said, and the other chickens laughed at and insulted it. The hunter tried several times to help him learn to fly, but without success, and the eagle thought that he was inferior to a normal chicken, let alone a chicken, and could not do what he could do. Finally the hunter lost his patience and threw it off the cliff, and the eagle fluttered its wings and finally spread its wings and flew high.

Your grades may not be good when you were a child, your parents in order to vent their dissatisfaction, but also to "motivate" you, saying that your IQ is not high, and then you think that this is indeed the case, when you encounter a slightly more complicated thing, you dare not do it on the grounds of low intelligence and low quotient or will not mobilize enthusiasm to do it at all, or do not do it, even if you do things, you are passive and perfunctory, do it hard, and label yourself as a low IQ. And so you went from being an eagle to a chicken that wasn't even as good as an ordinary chicken. You have to tell your parents that scolding you will only make you sluggish, and they are also venting bad feelings on you, you need to encourage and support tolerance now, you need to let them help you build up your self-confidence, think that you can fight in the sky, tell them what I explained above, it is best to mobilize your homeroom teacher to communicate this problem with your parents, because your parents will not believe what someone you don't know, teachers have studied a little psychology and are authoritative to your parents.

First of all, I sympathize with you. Because my parents are very good, I think the vast majority of parents in the world are sincere. If you look back, don't you have a little warmth in your memory?

If your parents are really so cold, you will have to endure until you have a job. Academic performance is not the most important thing (don't be obsessed with a specific goal, such as going to university), you can't have a lower IQ than others, and you may be very talented in other areas. The most important thing is to be in good health and in a cheerful mood, so that one day God will double down on you.

At present, no matter how they scold you, you have to focus on doing everything well, and if you don't study well, at least do the other small things you can do well, and don't be controlled by bad moods.

Say I really sympathize with you. Because I remember when I was in school, my parents were all around me and they weren't happy with everything I did. Mental torture can really break a person's will.

Some parents don't know how to educate their children, to put it mildly, such parents are also ignorant! You have to know, "What your parents say is not necessarily right." Even if you have to live under the words of your parents every day, even if it makes you very, very painful, but you have to be firm in your convictions, you have to know what kind of life you want to live!!

In this world, it doesn't mean that others say you're stupid, but do you have to believe the words of a madman?

I appreciate the words upstairs: those who suffer have no right to be pessimistic; In the event of a fire, there is no right to be afraid of the dark; On the battlefield, only warriors who are not afraid of death can achieve victory; Only those who suffer and are not pessimistic can overcome difficulties and get out of trouble!

First, not all parents are right, even God makes mistakes, so even if people hide and try to show their superiority, they will still make mistakes.

Second, they say you're stupid, and that's a mistake.

Thirdly, since they're wrong, you don't have to worry about anything, you probably won't argue with anything, but you should know what's right and what's wrong, and some people think it's adolescent rebellion, but people who don't try to rebel won't grow up, let alone make a difference.

Fourth, you are who you are, stick to your beliefs and find out what is best for you, and then continue to hold on to your beliefs so that you don't regret it.

A few movies are recommended.

Harvey. Crampaert - Oscar-winning short film.

Houghton and Anonymous.

Originally, I didn't like to interfere with other people's personalities, and I liked to look at people in all their variety, good and evil, right or wrong.

But I'm going to give you a little advice.

Why was Bruno burned to death and Copernicus survived?

It's more of a problem. Hungry.

Why are your parents like that, it means that they don't know how to educate their children, and educating children is not about beating, but about being attentive, so you don't have to take what they say to heart. Go for it, you'll do it.

You say that your IQ is low with others, is this what you have tested, don't look down on yourself so much, I also think that my IQ is low, but the measured IQ is still a normal person's IQ, your parents may hate iron and steel, after all, your parents are not educators, I don't know how to appease you, forgive them, they are already very busy in life, you ask this question, it means that you are a child who cares about other people's opinions, maybe not only your parents, if your classmates, your teacher said something to hit you, You will also not be able to bear it, your psychological tolerance is very poor, you say that you don't want to give up, that's a good thing, it means that you still feel that you have hope.

Study hard and hit them back with your grades.

Your world is for you to have, and not disturbing is my tenderness.

Dear to me, filial piety, dear to hate me, filial piety.

1. Be kind to them.

You must have a very good attitude towards your parents, keeping in mind that they may be angry with you, anxious, or even slap the table and shed tears at you, and you need to be fully prepared and maintain a good attitude.

Second, keep acknowledging their views first.

It's like "playing", you have to let them "hit" first, and then you "hit" back, you can't always "attack". So the first thing you have to do is to recognize and understand their love for you and their concern for you: "Mom, if I were you, my children would not get married, and I would be very worried.

I understand you very well, you must be under a lot of pressure. "Mom will feel warm.

3. Analyze the needs.

The biggest reason why your parents are urging you to get married is that you didn't solve the matter at the right time. Your need is that I want to find someone I like to marry. In fact, the biggest disagreement between us and our parents is at the point in time.

Fourth, think about what you want to say and the reasons for it.

On why he hasn't gotten married yet, and even some about "life". You have to let your parents understand that you have a plan and consideration for your life, and that you are treating your life with an adult and mature attitude. If you live like a child, you have to ask your parents for advice on what friends you make and what clothes you wear, and they will never listen to you when you discuss marriage with your parents.

You need to be very well prepared, both verbally and behaviorally. The behavioral preparation is that you have to be very mature in everything from now on, and not only in the matter of communicating with them about whether to get married, but suddenly mature, which your parents can't accept. We live in a different era than theirs, which has become very fast, so we are facing a lot of uncertainty, so we are moving much slower.

You see who and who, and who and who, they have been married for a year and then divorced. You don't want me to divorce in the future, you want me to be happy. If you want me to be happy, let me find my happiness slowly, and I believe I can find the happiness I want.

In fact, in the eyes of parents, their children are very good, so they will trust you. )

When I was young, I could get the New Year's money from my elders every time I was in the New Year, and I would feel very happy at this time. ......However, parents sometimes take away their New Year's money for various reasons......For this problem, my own response is to be ignorant and ignorant when I was a child, and I have no feelings, and when I am older, my parents will not hide my skin and then take away my New Year's money, and I can reassure my parents by reasonably disposing of my New Year's money.

1. When I was young, I was ignorant and ignorant, and my parents didn't feel anything about taking away their New Year's money.

When I was very young, I was in a state of ignorance and ignorance. At this time, I didn't have any concept of New Year's money, and I didn't know how to pretend to be a brother and manage it. Therefore, during this period of time, his New Year's money was taken away by his parents......I didn't feel anything about it, as long as my parents could buy me delicious food and a few toys for myself, I felt very happy and content.

2. When you are older, your parents will no longer collect your own New Year's money, and you don't need to deal with anything.

When you are older, especially after you go to school, your parents will no longer charge you for the New Year's money. ......They once said to themselves that they were already the eldest and that they should do their own things. ......Because of this, after I grew up, my parents never collected my New Year's money, and I didn't need to deal with it, as long as I managed my New Year's money.

3. Let your parents rest assured by rationally disposing of the New Year's money, and they will rest assured that they will let themselves manage the New Year's money.

Although their parents no longer take away the New Year's money after they grow up, they are still afraid that they will spend the New Year's money indiscriminately and bring bad influence to themselves ......At this time, your actual performance will have a direct impact on this matter......Specifically, I noticed this and took the right steps to deal with it. I have made reasonable use of my New Year's money, first of all, I don't spend money indiscriminately, and secondly, I try to save as much as possible when I spend money. In this way, my parents are very relieved of me, and they no longer ask about my New Year's money, but let me manage it myself.

My parents never took my New Year's money after that.

1. Put down the mobile phone and game console in your hand and go to watch TV and talk with your mother.

2. Take a walk with your mother, open up with her, share interesting stories, talk about your life experiences and problems, and your mother will give advice like a friend.

3. Help your mother massage. As my mother gets older and more susceptible to arthritis and other diseases, she will feel intimate by helping her massage often.

4. Respect your mother's interests and hobbies, and don't think about completely occupying your mother's time.

5. Make a small greeting card for your mother on Mother's Day, and wish your mother a happy holiday!

6. Go to bed early and get up early, don't disturb your mother's sleep.

7. Take the initiative to help your mother wash dishes and laundry. It's best to surprise your mom without knowing it.

8. Boast that the dishes cooked by your mother are delicious, even if they are not appetizing, don't be picky about them.

Taking into account the feelings of your parents, resistance and quarrels do not solve any problems, even if you verbally "win" your parents, you will not have any sense of accomplishment and hurt your parents at the same time. Therefore, when you have a disagreement with your parents, do not rush to express your inner thoughts, realize that the concepts are different, and listen patiently to your parents' words.

Don't neglect to communicate with your parents under the pretext of reassuring them. Parents have rich experience in life and quarrel with ants, and they can be consulted about small problems in life. Parents are relieved to be able to help their children solve problems.

Don't let your parents feel like they're old and useless to you except nagging.

In the eyes of our parents, we will always be children who will not grow up, be more patient with our parents, don't think that our parents are interfering in our own lives, even if we have our own life plans, we must combine the opinions of our parents. Realize self-worth can not be at the expense of making parents sad, "do not listen to the old man and suffer in front of you", we are young, is in the stage of groping and learning, and parents have gone through years of precipitation, with their own life experience in exchange for teaching us to ascend, parents' words, need to be carefully tasted.

We spend most of our time "coping" outside, smiling and welcoming. It's hard to see your parents, even if we don't agree with what your parents say, we must comply with our words and make our parents happy, because the days we can spend with our parents are getting less and less.

Abandon clothes to stretch out your hand, and food to open your mouth. Truly integrate into the world of your parents, cook a meal with your parents, take time to help your parents wash their clothes, reduce their parents' housework burden, strengthen communication with your parents, and learn to listen to your parents' voices. We are young, active in thinking, and use our own advantages to relieve our parents' worries.

As we grow older, our parents' physical functions gradually decline, and their physiology and psychology will change, and it is inevitable that there will be times of emotional instability, which requires us to find out carefully and help them get through smoothly and not have a head-on conflict with their parents. As a child, you should know that "the crow has the filial piety of feeding, and the sheep knows the grace of kneeling milk", treat parents as patient as they did when we were young, understand and care more, and put filial piety first.