Why do others make mistakes and feel very uncomfortable in their own hearts?

It has nothing to do with you when others make mistakes, but you will feel very uncomfortable in your heart, I think the reason is that you should be the one who indirectly caused others to make mistakes, so you will have such a sense of guilt!

I've been through this before, and I wasn't the one who made a mistake and was criticized, but I just felt very uncomfortable and felt sorry for that person. Because that incident seems to have nothing to do with me on the surface, but I know very well that I am a participant in that matter, and I gave her the wrong guidance that caused her to make a mistake.

At that time, the company wanted to hold a dealer conference, and I, a veteran employee, was only responsible for the follow-up progress, and a lot of implementation and follow-up matters were handed over to the newcomers to do.

The newcomer Xiao Zhou was in charge of making customer docking invitations at that time, and she must not know which customer is more important, which customer needs to be invited, and so on. I was busy reading a performance table, so I didn't take Xiao Zhou's questions very seriously, so I directly told her to follow the customer docking table sent by the previous leader, and just go to the docking one by one.

But I forgot the docking table that Xiao Zhou got, it was actually wrong! It's not the latest, many new customers are not in the ** at all, so that when it comes to following up the progress and submitting the docking data, I find that there are still many people in Xiaozhou who have not gone to the docking, and these are potential new customers, and they are also the main customers we want to develop at this dealer conference.

Xiao Zhou was reprimanded by the leader, saying that she didn't even know what customer resources were, and I happened to go out for a meeting at the time, and when I came back to know, I really felt very uncomfortable, after all, she asked me, an old employee, and it was just that I didn't tell her well.

I also feel this way a lot, because they can't just say anything when they make mistakes, and when they say it, they get angry easily, and if they don't say what they say, it's easier for me to get angry, so in the end it's uncomfortable anyway.

Just like when I was in high school, I was the representative of the Chinese class, and my classmates thought I was easy to talk to, and I never handed in my homework on time. Every time they don't turn in their homework or write their homework, it's their own business, it's their own mistake, but in the end, it's me who is unhappy. Because when they are punished by the teacher, I always feel that it is my dereliction of duty, that I have not supervised them well.

But every time they make a mistake, when I criticize them and supervise them, they are always angry with me, which makes me baffled.

Another time, the math teacher lost his temper with us, thinking that our class was too lazy, and many people did not write homework in class and did not pay attention to the lectures. Although I wasn't in that group, I felt even more sad than them.

Later, the students who wrote our homework could leave first, but I still stayed there with those who didn't finish their homework.

When I go to college, I often see people making mistakes. And the mistakes I made were all low-level mistakes, and I felt very uncomfortable in my heart, I wondered why people would make such mistakes?

There are also many people who have a wrong understanding of other people's hometowns, and then use those questions to ask other people's hometowns, which seems to be particularly disrespectful. At this time, I felt very speechless, I always felt that they didn't come through time?

Some people make mistakes that are really speechless and uncomfortable. Especially the attitude of some people when they make mistakes, that is called a speechless.

It shows that you are a soft-hearted person, and you will feel sad when you see others being punished for making mistakes.

Because you are compassionate, you don't want to be put in a bad situation.

You have done something wrong, it is very uncomfortable to blame yourself and feel guilty, this situation has been experienced by each of us, if there is no way to make up for your mistakes, then try to enlighten yourself.

1. Repent in your heart.

Since we can't make up for our mistakes, and we can't turn back time, we can only repent in our hearts and always warn ourselves not to make the same mistakes, so that our hearts will feel better.

2. Transfer the object of compensation.

When we can't forgive ourselves for doing something wrong, we can transfer that guilt to make up for other objects. We can make up for our mistakes with other things, so that we can feel more at ease in our hearts.

3. Great love in the world.

We can do more kind things in our daily lives and help more people in need. Let our spiritual life love our world with great love.

4. It can be written in a diary and recorded.

If you have a mistake that really makes you feel very uncomfortable, you can write down your feelings and write down your confession, so that your heart will feel a lot better.

5. You can confide in your loved ones.

If you can talk to your loved ones about your faults, then you can talk to your loved ones. Some things are very uncomfortable to hold in your heart, and it will be easier to say them, but remember that the person you confide in must be reliable and will not cause you harm.

Everything, I feel that I am wrong, even if it is something that is very certain, after being told two words, I start to doubt myself, and then even if it is right, I feel that I have something to do with wrong, and no matter what I do, I feel that I am wrong and sinful. The vast majority of people who are accustomed to self-denial have a positive subconscious inside of them – "I want to be better!" ”

The concept of self-denial is a kind of social evolutionary thought driven by self-denial. Whether you want to admit it or not, "self-denial" has a certain positive effect. But once we develop the habit of self-denial, how can we be so miserable and even lose the way forward?

I will first analyze the "why" from the "reasons for its formation" and "psychological explanation", and then the solution that the subject wants to know.

Hello, I am the emotional fairy sister, waiting patiently for me.

This shows that you have too much ability to condemn yourself, and you think too much, which will create pressure on yourself, so don't think so much, don't think nonsense, just come out with anything, solve any problems, don't pile up in your own cognition, make yourself embarrassed, difficult for yourself, and feel bad.

Questions. I'm the person in charge of an outpatient clinic, and I recently had a problem that didn't have anything to do with me, but when it came to being fined, I felt that I didn't handle it properly.

Now that you have a fine, then you can fine it, this matter has passed, and it can be regarded as a finished deal, don't blame yourself, just continue with the reality in the future.

Questions. I blamed myself in my heart, and I felt that in fact, if I had reacted faster at the time, it could have been avoided, not that things had already appeared, and there was already a ticket, so I didn't care about it, as long as I paid attention to it later, and didn't make a second mistake. That's right.

Some people have been around since childhood, that is, the original family of the family, maybe their parents blame you too much, often criticize you, or blame you, and no matter what you do wrong, they just beat and scold you, so what about the children? When I grew up, I felt that everything was my fault, and I felt inferior.

It's all his own fault, this kind of person should have a heart of self-blame, but he may be a more ashamed kind of person.

Summary. Hello dear.

Why do people with intelligence make mistakes "knowingly".

Because people, living in this world, will not always do what they want to do, "knowingly" is just a general statement, for example, we have been taught to be a good person since childhood, not to lie, not to do bad things. But when we get older, we will find that if we really do that, then we will fail to the end, and we will not be scolded by others, and we will be regarded as abnormal by others.

Why do some people feel uncomfortable knowing that they are making mistakes but not making mistakes?

Hello, dear, why do people with intelligence make mistakes "knowingly". Because people, living in this world, will not always do what they want to do, "knowingly" is just a general statement, for example, we have been taught to be a good person since childhood, not to lie, not to do bad things. But when we get older, we will find that if we really do that, then we will fail to the end, and we will not be scolded by others, and we will be regarded as abnormal by others.

So, don't think about whether what you're doing is wrong, but think about whether you're doing it and whether it's worthy of you. Just make yourself happy! Hope it helps.

The mistakes I am talking about are small mistakes in life, and it is uncomfortable not to be criticized.

Am I subconsciously begging to be noticed?

Cheerful with acquaintances.

Coincidentally, there will be such a heart.

Summary. Feeling uncomfortable doing something wrong, most people have this feeling, learn to accept yourself, if you can change something wrong, then try to recover the loss, change, if you can't change, then learn to face it, eat a trench and grow wise, don't make the same mistakes in the future, learn to tolerate yourself, because no one is perfect, everyone is easy to make mistakes, it is impossible to make no mistakes at all. Cultivate more hobbies and find more interesting things to do, use them to divert your attention, and don't make yourself always entangled in mistakes.

It's very uncomfortable to do something wrong, what should I do?

Feeling uncomfortable doing something wrong, most people have this feeling, learn to accept yourself, if you can change something wrong, then try to recover the loss, change, if you can't change, then learn to face it, eat a trench and grow wise, don't make the same mistakes in the future, learn to tolerate yourself, because no one is perfect, everyone is easy to make mistakes, it is impossible to make no mistakes at all. Cultivate more hobbies and find more interesting things to do, use them to divert your attention, and don't make yourself always entangled in mistakes.

Don't run away! The best way to do that is to be brave! The crux is that you owe them to them, you should not be afraid of the news about them, if you want to untie the knot, you should make up for your debts, there is no hurdle that cannot be passed, when you are brave to face it, cheeky to make up for it, your heart will also be sublimated by the mutual aid community of the One Psychological Q&A Hall, the world and I love you >>

I think it's because you're too empathetic.

The ability to empathize is too strong, kind, and compassionate, and can clearly feel the pain and emotions of others and feel the heartache of others. I even feel guilty and blamed myself for not being able to help others.

The result? In the end, because of this strong empathy ability, I was tortured and hurt. The others turned around and walked away, leaving themselves bruised in place.

I'm so good, so good at holding the old good, but it's always me who gets hurt. Why? Why? This extremely unbalanced psychology gradually develops into hatred for others, and even for the world.

This starts with personality consciousness.

Freud believed that human mental activities are divided into conscious, preconscious, and subconscious. The subconscious mind is the deep structure of a person's mental activity, including primitive impulses and instincts.

The structure of the personality is divided into id, ego, and superego. The ego represents the part of the personality structure that pursues the instinctive desires of the creatures, following the pleasure principle; The ego follows the principle of reality; The superego follows moral principles.

You don't think it's "my" fault, it's the level of consciousness, love parting, and so on. And in a deeper subconscious, he will keep telling "himself" repeatedly, which may be Duan Dusheng's bad result because of what Jie Sen did wrong for "me".

That's why I feel sad when it's not my fault.

This psychological person belongs to the relationship between friends, attaches great importance to affection and righteousness, and is afraid that everything will be related to him.

On the one hand, I am labeling myself, there are negative elements, on the other hand, I refuse to deny, I am conflicted, I have a part of my cognitive psychology that I disagree with, I am eager to agree, don't worry, give my heart a vacation, and slowly find the answer.

First of all, improve your awareness and understanding of yourself.

We are easily distracted by external feedback, such as: we will be happy when we get affirmation and praise from others; We will be unhappy to be criticized or denied; And when others neither affirm nor say negative, our hearts are even more depressed; This is a very normal mentality, but it also illustrates our lack of understanding of ourselves.

Note: It doesn't mean that after understanding yourself, you don't care about other people's feedback and evaluations, but you can quickly judge whether the other party's "guarantee and depreciation" of yourself is reasonable, and it will not affect your mood. (For questions about self-understanding, you can refer to the article "I don't know myself, I don't know my preferences, I don't have a sense of direction in life, how can I break it?")

Second, learn to correctly interpret the negative feedback of others.

Parents, teachers, and leaders may not be all right in their criticism of us, and our colleagues, classmates, and lovers may not be all right in their criticism of us.

If you want to be undisturbed, you need to learn to correctly interpret the negative feedback of others, that is, on the basis of accepting that they are ordinary people with various shortcomings, you need to develop your own ability to distinguish between right and wrong (this point needs to be learned over time and explored in social practice).

Third, stick to what you think is right.

If you want to breathe your heart and become your own master, stick to what you think is right, and if you are rejected, hold on to it again, hold on to it again, hold on to it again, and hold on to it again......(Just be sure to pay attention to the attitude and approach).

Here you may ask, "How do I know what I think, say and do is right?" This is a very broad topic, so you only need to meet the eight words at the same time: "Harmless to others, harmless to yourself!" "That's fine.

Finally, it takes time to correct mistakes.

Let me tell you a little secret first: once you realize some problems, they will disappear immediately. For example, because you have made a fool of yourself in front of others because you have said the wrong thing, you will never say this again in the future.

But there are some faults, even if you realize it, you need a lot of practice to correct. For example: wrong habitual thinking.

Therefore, the speed of correction depends on the degree of awareness of the mistake and the complexity of the mistake itself.

Therefore, when you agree with the negative evaluation of others about you, or find all kinds of shortcomings in yourself, and cannot change them all at once, the only way is to find the cause of this problem first, and then gradually eliminate them.