I don t want to have children, my family doesn t agree, find a way to make me accept their opinions,

1. Look at the reasons why you don't want to have children.

From your description, I can feel your inner irritability, anxiety, worry, restlessness, tiredness, pain, and overwhelm. I advise you to be rational about why you don't want to have children. Because looking at it rationally can make you better recognize yourself and reality.

Looking at it rationally, you need to do the following three things: First, understand that after careful consideration, it is possible to make a decision without regret after making a choice. In other words, you have to think carefully about the reason why you don't want to have children, whether it is really impossible to change, and this kind of scrutiny can make you make a decision that you don't regret.

For example, if you don't want to have a child because of physical reasons, then you need to ask the hospital to do a relatively comprehensive examination, listen to what the doctor says, and then make a decision; If you are worried that you will not be able to bear the hard work of raising children in the future, then you can communicate with your family, including your partner, and listen to what they do, which may also allow you to make rational decisions, etc.

2. Having a baby is not about completing a task, but out of your love.

You said in the description that you even want to have a baby early, complete the task, and then end your own life, which is not right, because if you give birth to a child in that case, it is better not to have a child, because the child is painful, and the child should be born because of love.

3. The right to have children or not has always been in your hands, and others have no right to interfere.

Of course, you have to discuss it with your partner, otherwise it will not be worth it to have conflicts in the future. When you look at it rationally like this, all kinds of negative emotions in your heart.

Maybe it will defuse some. Again, I suggest that you focus on yourself and think about what you can do to make yourself more relaxed. When you look at the reasons why you don't want to have children, you may know what to do, and then you focus on yourself and do your best.

If you still don't want to have children after communicating with them, then you can give them some time, during which you can learn the communication style of "non-hostile resoluteness", that is, "you reject them, do not do things according to their ideas, and the attitude is very resolute, but you are not hostile", so that after many times of communication, they may also realize that their approach has crossed the line, something is wrong, and then change, and your mood will be eased because of their changes.

4. Don't rush to make a decision, because when you get married, your mind is likely to change.

If you are a little hesitant about the idea of having a child, you should give yourself some time and don't rush to make a decision, because when you get married, your mind will likely change.

If you think rationally and finally decide not to have children, and they can't accept it, then you can only accept the reality, because it is normal for them not to understand you, after all, it is a person of different eras, and they have different understandings of marriage, love, and children, and then you just need to be prepared not to regret it, so that your mood may also be better, because you know that having children is your own business, and you need to make your own decisions; Wait, you have to know that you can do something to make a difference.

I can understand how you feel. I conclude that it is easy for yourself to accept and difficult for others to accept.

To accept yourself first, you have to affirm your conclusions and have enough reasons to support your ideas. If you're undecided, take the time to think for yourself, as you may regret it.

It's hard to get others to accept it, and you can only choose to ignore the feelings. The saddest thing among relatives is husband and wife, and husbands or wives are the most likely to regret them.

Take the initiative to communicate with your family, tell them every day that you don't want to have children, and slowly and subtly affect them, and after a long time, they will accept it.

I think at this time you should communicate with them and tell yourself what you really think, and secondly, I think you still have to have children, don't be so selfish.

I should communicate well with your husband, tell your husband what he thinks in his heart, and let your husband convince the family.

Legal basis: "Law of the People's Republic of China on the Protection of Women's Rights and Interests" Article 51: Women have the right to have children in accordance with relevant state provisions, and also have the freedom not to have children. Husbands and wives of childbearing age shall follow the relevant provisions of the State in family planning, and the relevant departments shall provide safe and effective contraceptives and technology to ensure the health and safety of women undergoing birth control operations.

The State implements a system of premarital health care and maternal health care, and develops maternal and infant health care. People at all levels shall take measures to ensure that women enjoy family planning technical services and improve women's reproductive health.

As a dink (childless couple), it can be difficult to deal with parents, because many parents want their children to have offspring as soon as possible and continue the family lineage. Here are some suggestions:

1.Start by understanding your parents' thoughts and expectations. When communicating with parents, listen to their ideas and expectations first to understand their perspectives and attitudes. This will allow for a better understanding of their position and a more targeted response to their questions and concerns.

2.Be honest about your thoughts. If you and your spouse have decided not to have children, be honest with your parents about what you think and explain the reasons behind your decision.

You can emphasize the importance you attach to your family, career, personal development, etc., so that your parents can understand that you have your own life plan.

3.Respect each other's choices. Whether you want children or not, you should respect each other's choices. If you've already made a decision, stand firm for your choice and respect your parents' feelings of resentment or resentment.

4.Pay due attention to your parents' feelings. While you have the right to make your own choices, pay due attention to your parents' feelings as well. Try to put yourself in their shoes, understand their concerns and expectations, and try to ease their anxiety.

5.Maintain communication and understanding. Communication with parents is very important to constantly exchange ideas and feelings with each other.

If you can understand their concerns and expectations, and let them understand your plans for the future, it may be easier to reach a consensus.

Finally, remember to stand firm on your choices no matter what, and respect each other's positions. Hopefully, the above advice will be helpful to you.

You are also a piece of meat in your parents' hearts, so you just insist on your own decision, and your parents have no choice but to bear it silently.

The main reason is that raising a child is too tiring, I am lazy, and I have a rejection of things I don't like, raising a child from preparing for pregnancy to being in his twenties is indeed a big deal, from drinking milk powder, wearing diapers to babbling; From early education in kindergarten, to primary school news, to junior high school, to college, after having a daughter, it is okay to work after graduation, and having a son has to help a middle school to buy a house, buy a car and marry a daughter-in-law, everything has to be done by yourself and your girlfriend.

If the two parties do not have even a preliminary consensus before marriage, but hope to try to persuade each other after marriage, this practice is extremely irresponsible, such a marriage has no common foundation, this is more difficult, my approach is to be able to procrastinate, and continue to show that I don't like the child, I hope to give the parents enough psychological preparation, and finally frankly and discussively.

I feel that if your parents are highly educated, they can accept your ideas, but the ideas are not the same as reality, and maybe one day you will get married and have children.

If your parents are just ordinary farmers or workers who sell liquid, they will not agree to anything, at least they will force you to get married, and they will not force you to have children first.

Pity the hearts of parents all over the world, parents are worried that we are old and alone, and there is no one to accompany us. I really don't know how to do this, because no matter how many reasons, it seems so small in front of the love of my parents.

01. Confessing to telling parents may not be acceptable for a while, but concealing it makes them even more sad.

A lie will always hurt more than the truth, unless it can be concealed for a lifetime. But it is obviously impossible to have children, and if you delay it again and again, you will only be talked about by your parents all day long. The mother-in-law will also feel that the daughter-in-law does not want to have children, or is infertile.

Confessing to them is the best thing to do, and it may be unacceptable for a while, but it's better than putting it off until the end. The reason why Dink is not understood by the older generation is because they believe that to be born as human is to carry on the lineage. Young couples are determined not to have children, so they must show a tough attitude, even if it will make their parents sad for a while, they must stick to their principles.

As long as two people don't want to give birth, no matter how much their parents persecute them, they can't force each other to death.

02, the choice of Dink between husband and wife should be carefully considered, parents are from the past, and they know that there is no sadness of offspring.

It's not difficult for parents, but it's the Dink couple themselves who are really sad. Before choosing a dink, it is best to think carefully, such as whether you can accept life without children in your later years? Other people's homes are brightly lit and the family is reunited, but only the husband and wife are staring at each other in their own house.

Retired neighbors with grandchildren, Dink and his wife can only wander around. Not to mention that after retirement, you can travel everywhere, and when you really reach the age of seventy or eighty, it is extremely difficult to go far away. The reason why parents oppose their son being a dink is that they know that the old man is miserable without children in his old age.

If young people can accept these drawbacks, it is not impossible to be a dink. At least there will be no financial pressure in the first half of your life, you don't have to think about how much it costs to raise a child, and how much money you earn is spent on yourself. Compared to families with children, the quality of life is indeed very different.

But the rest of their lives were not so happy, and some Dinks regretted their stupid decision. Seeing that everyone around him is full of children and grandchildren, but there is only his wife and himself at home, and he is lonely.

03. If you decide to live a Dink life, you will have to bear the consequences of not having children to take care of by your side.

Finally, I want to emphasize that when I was young, I decided to live a dink life, and I don't regret it when I am old. There is no regret medicine in the world, and before choosing not to have children, you can go to a nursing home to see how these old people live. You may not need to worry about the cost of living in old age, but you always have to be taken care of when you are sick and hospitalized.

At this time, it is estimated that many people feel that it is really necessary to have a few children, when I visited my father in the hospital, I saw an old man hospitalized without taking care of him, he did have a little money, 24 hours to hire a nurse, but the nurse is never a family, he is for money to take care of the patient, will not be like children can take care of everything. He often said that if he had a son, it would not be so desolate, and no one would care if he was sick.

A: First, if your parents are very traditional, it's best not to say it before you get married. Parents still have a lot of energy in the matter of marriage, and if you make marriage a fait accompli first, it will be difficult for them to break you up because you want to dink.

In addition, it is also out of a procrastination. Stabilizing parents with white lies and how long they can drag on seems to be the most common way to deal with stubborn parents. Again, if there are no accidents, the longer it drags on, the better the economic foundation will usually be, and the more confident you will be when you finally have a showdown with your parents.

Traditionally, an important purpose of getting married and having children is to raise children to prevent old age, and if you can show your parents enough financial strength to provide for their old age, it will be much easier to convince them.

Second, if you want to convince your parents to accept your Dink's point of view, then try to be obedient to your parents' arrangements in other matters, calm their emotions, and let them worry about you as little as possible in other matters. After all, the traditional concept is that unfilial piety is the greatest, and this emotion of parents is difficult to solve, especially your boyfriend's parents, which may be difficult to accept. So be sure to be as filial as possible in other things to dilute the impression that they think you are unfilial.

Thirdly, I am hesitant to say ......If you are fully prepared to have a showdown with your parents, they still can't accept it at all, and they must force you to have children or even force you to divorce, and there is a last-ditch killer move. That is to create a fait accompli. That is, you go to the ligation surgery with your boyfriend.

I want to remind you that this is a tactic that will end up together, and there is no possibility of going back, so if you really come to this point, please also, definitely, definitely, think twice. This trick will definitely cause serious psychological trauma to your parents, so please do your best to erase the wounds in your parents' hearts after taking this step.