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Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship. It can be said that it is the most delicate relationship in the world. Some people compare it to a flood beast, talking about their mother-in-law or daughter-in-law's itchy teeth, as if they have met the biggest enemy in their lives!
There are also some people who talk about the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law with a happy face, feeling that they have an extra mother or an extra daughter in this world! In my opinion, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is good or bad, and I don't believe you see that the bad relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law around you is a contradiction that gradually accumulates in daily life and finally erupts, rather than a bad relationship from the beginning. Some people say that there are several situations in a family with a bad relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law:
Some people say that there are several situations in a family with a bad relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law: first, there is a man in the family who can't carry it clearly, or even a mother's treasure man.
has no opinions, does not know how to resolve the problems between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and blindly avoids, which leads to the deterioration of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law! Second, as the subject said, there is an unreasonable mother-in-law in the family, and such a family is generally a family of origin.
The environment is not good, such as laziness, selfishness, there is no warmth between family members, more calculation and utilitarianism! Third, the gap between the family environment of men and women is too large, resulting in daughters-in-law not being able to integrate into the new family, not tolerating each other, blindly trying to change each other, and causing conflicts!
Of course, there are many reasons for the conflict between mothers, and these are the most common. And when you meet an unreasonable mother-in-law, I think the wise thing to do is to "can't afford to hide", don't confront her head-on, since you know that your mother-in-law doesn't know things, if you still have the same knowledge as her, it means that you are also an unreasonable person, are you right? When many people meet such unreasonable people, they always try to use their own concepts to change each other, but they don't know that the most difficult thing to change in this world is people's hearts, and the other party's decades of personality problems are not something that others can help her change!
Therefore, we can't change others, we can only change ourselves, and let ourselves accept that there is such an old man around us, and turn a blind eye to some things that we are not used to. There is no need to deliberately maintain any kind of state, maintaining a good sense of distance from each other is actually a wise move, do your own thing, talk less and do more, you will avoid a lot of head-to-head confrontations. A friend of mine, his mother and wife did not get along, and it was useless for him to mediate, and then his mother and daughter-in-law were under the same roof for more than ten years but did not speak to each other, and the rest was peaceful, and when they got older, the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law reconciled themselves.
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You should maintain a good attitude, I think there is something wrong with your mentality, which is why you always feel that your mother-in-law is not reasonable. You can also stay away from your mother-in-law, so that less contact with your mother-in-law will save you a lot of trouble.
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Leave it alone, feel like your mother-in-law doesn't have it. Responsible, not sensible. Because in my mother-in-law's heart, he is also for your good. If your mother-in-law does something wrong, you should talk to him openly and honestly, so that he will get rid of his problems.
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When you meet an ignorant mother-in-law, there is really no way. He is not reasonable, he is because his approach is correct, then you think that your approach is correct, if it is the tip of the needle, then there will definitely be no growth between you, so it is good to say that there is only one person to compromise.
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You can't always think that everyone's lifestyle is different. She has her way of life, you have your way of life, and you can't impose your way of life on her.
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You should let your mother-in-law understand that what you are doing is right, and now there will be a certain difference in the minds of the old and the young, which is very bad, so it should be done.
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I always feel that as a junior, I don't have the right to point fingers at my elders, even if she doesn't do it to herself, that is, don't clash with her head-on.
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Because there is a big difference in life between myself and my mother-in-law, and there is a big generation gap, if you encounter this situation, your husband can adjust it.
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You should stay away from your mother-in-law, try not to get into an argument, and keep a certain distance between the two parties, so that it is good for both parties.
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You can communicate with your husband and let him persuade your mother-in-law, and the communication between mother and son is a little better.
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If you think that's the case, then you'd better not contact each other and keep your distance so that his actions don't affect you.
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Love the house and Wu, try not to see her in general, don't reason with her, because you can't understand how to theoretical, it's rare to be confused.
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This situation is to ask us to relax our mentality, relax our mentality and look at the problem, and we will not be entangled.
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There is an unreasonable mother-in-law who will not tolerate the other party for no reason, because her blind withdrawal will only make the other party worse, and it will also cause her normal life to be seriously affected. Therefore, at this time, everyone must treat the mother-in-law's interference with a rational attitude, and only in this way can we better maintain the peace of the three parties. First of all, you can choose to have a good chat with your husband, tell your husband what is wrong with her mother-in-law's behavior, and let her husband communicate with his mother.
must pull the husband into his camp, only in this way can he better deal with the unreasonable interference of his mother-in-law. There are many people who always feel that they are juniors, so they are as envious as they want to let their elders, and feel that this is a kind of respect for their elders. However, the elders did not do their job well, they did not respect the lives of the younger generations, but arbitrarily interfered in the lives of their children, which would have a great impact on the children.
As a child, you can indeed choose to respect your elders, but you must do so on the basis of not affecting your normal life. <>
After communicating with the husband, let the husband think about whether the mother-in-law's behavior is problematic, and if the husband is willing to communicate, it is the best choice. If the mother-in-law can change after the husband communicates with the mother-in-law, then the daughter-in-law can also choose to take the initiative to talk to the mother-in-law at this time. And tell the other party that he just wants the family to be more harmonious, so he will make such a decision, and resolve the conflict between the two people in this way.
But if there is really no way to change the mother-in-law's mind, you can try to live alone with your husband, because living together will definitely cause all kinds of problems, so it is better to choose to be okay with each other, so it is also very good to live without disturbing each other. During the New Year's holidays, you can choose to visit your elders, and you can also eat and eat together, as long as you don't live together, it won't cause these problems.
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I will treat it with a rational attitude, because she is an elder after all, and if I don't respect her, it will definitely seem that I have no family education, but if she has always been a messy person, then if there is no matter, I will not go to her house at all, and try to avoid less communication.
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I will choose to keep a little distance from my mother-in-law, and I will not live in Zhengqueshan in a home, as much as possible not to meet, when I encounter problems, I will choose to let my husband communicate with my mother-in-law.
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If you meet a mother-in-law who can't do things, this should be a troublesome thing, but you should also accept it gladly. I have to say that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is the most difficult relationship in the world, whether the mother-in-law can do things or not, I believe that when the mother-in-law meets her daughter-in-law, she will become less able to do things. So I suggest that whether you meet a good mother-in-law or a mother-in-law who is not so happy, try not to get along for a long time, as the saying goes, distance produces beauty.
If you can't live together, you can't live together, because this is the easiest way to reduce conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. You can have a family gathering one day a week, which not only creates a sense of freshness, but also maintains a good atmosphere of home. Some people may say that they can teach their mother-in-law how to do it, or correct it themselves.
This method will exacerbate the conflict, and everyone will not admit that they have made mistakes, so don't ask the other person to correct them. If you want to change yourself, then you will feel that you are very wronged, and one day you will explode.
So personally, I think the best advice is that the mother-in-law has a family, and the son has his own family, and each can go his own way. Not disturbing each other is a very good way to get along.
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The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is always a problem for the ages, and living under one roof should be more tolerant. After all, people who are not in the same era will have certain differences in ideological concepts. For example, the elderly are more frugal.
Young people nowadays have some habits of life. The old man may nag if he can't get used to it, so the daughter-in-law will definitely get angry when she hears her mother-in-law's nagging. Don't be like the elderly, be broad-minded.
If you really can't live with the elderly, then buy a house. Or move out.
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Since you have found that your mother-in-law can't do things, you have to correct your mentality, it is already a matter of affection for your mother-in-law to come to help, and it is not up to her to decide whether she can help or not. So, since your mother-in-law can't do things, you might as well lower your requirements so that you won't be so tired.
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This situation is normal, why does she have to do these things when she is a mother-in-law, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along, and sometimes you are not necessarily satisfied with what your mother-in-law does. If you are a very active mother-in-law, it is estimated that you will also be angry, because she can't look past what you do, and she thinks that you have done something wrong and not done well. In the future, you will also be someone else's mother-in-law, you will be so powerful, what your daughter-in-law thinks in her heart, you will know what to do immediately?
Be a person and do things, think more from the perspective of others, your mother-in-law has no obligation, she has to help you do something, and if you can't get used to it, you can do it yourself.
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I'm in a similar situation to you, and when I first got married, I couldn't stand it. Later, I found out that it is I who suffers, and the other party will not change. But life still has to go on, and the relationship can't break up with your own temperament, so you have to slowly change yourself.
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If you really meet a mother-in-law who can't do things, I think you should tolerate her and slowly teach him what to do in the future.
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Mother-in-law can't do things, she didn't know how to do things when she was young, and when she is old, you still ask her to learn to do things? Mother-in-law doesn't know how to do it, so you'll do it yourself. You know, life is your own.
Be smart to be a "daughter-in-law", life is with your husband, not with your mother-in-law, you don't understand now, your mother-in-law can help you, your mother-in-law is gone, who will help you? Who can you count on? Then you are young and don't understand anything, and in the future, you will not be a mother-in-law or mother-in-law who "doesn't know how to do things" in your mouth now.
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It's best not to expect too much, or you'll be disappointed even more. Endure it for a while, and it's over. Even if you can't bear it, people are over half a hundred years old, and they won't change anything because of anyone. So it's better to endure and be good to yourself.
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What to do is to find out what she can do through a few days of observation, such as mopping the floor, washing dishes, cleaning, whether she can still do it, even if these things are not good, it doesn't matter, you can tell her how to do better.
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It can be said that in this life, if there is an unreasonable mother-in-law, of course, it is very hard, and the whole life is very depressing, and I don't know how to live at all. In fact, in the emotional life, a sensible mother-in-law is very important, and there are many little girls who don't understand this problem when they first look for a partner, and always feel that liking someone is enough. But I didn't expect that in life, a sensible mother-in-law is much stronger than a sensible husband.
It is recommended that all girls must pay attention when looking for a partner, at the beginning they are trying to figure out the person they like, and of course they should pay attention to the later marriage. The sensible mother-in-law will be more harmonious in all aspects of her life in the future. After all, after getting married, it is all a matter of firewood, rice, oil and salt, and every bit needs to be asked by both families.
In particular, some mothers-in-law are very unreasonable, which leads to the relationship between two people will eventually break down, and in this case, it is the girls who are hurt. <>
The pressure of life is relatively high now, and the pressure of work is also great every day, especially now that the children's education is very careful in all aspects. Mother-in-law is a very important pillar, without a good mother-in-law, of course, she will suffer in the future. I often hear some mothers-in-law saying that daughter-in-law is not good for various topics outside, like this kind of mother-in-law, who is more snobbish, and the daughter-in-law will often be wronged at home.
When some husbands talk to themselves, there will be some comfort, but some husbands will be biased towards their parents to make themselves feel like an outsider, which is a feeling that many people can't accept. It is each other who is hurt by the breakdown of this marriage, and the most pitiful are their own children. Therefore, when I was looking for a partner to marry, I had to look not only at the husband, but also on the situation of the parents of both parties.
Family can highlight the influence of feelings, it may be said that many girls don't understand this, but after entering married life, they will suddenly understand.
Since you have married an ignorant wife, then you should use your wisdom to help your wife slowly become sensible, maybe your wife with your help, can slowly become a sensible wife, of course, this requires patience and time, if your wife loves you very much, then she will be able to change her ignorant bad habits, be a kind wife. If you don't know how to quarrel with your wife, then your wife will become more and more ignorant.
If you are really sick, you can go to the hospital for examination. If there is no illness after the examination, he still suspects. I can't help it. Let him doubt it. There are people with suspicions.
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