Ask for the funniest lies in a hurry.

One day, Xiao Ming took the homework book that Xiao Tao had just copied and judged a full score, and gave Xiao Tao 5 cents to tell Xiao Tao not to say it. Xiao Tao was very puzzled, so he came to the school, in order not to let the teacher see that he copied. I deliberately wrote a bunch of words next to the question I copied (teacher.

Don't think I'm copying, in fact, I'm not copying, I'm really not copying, don't believe you to ask Xiaotao, Xiaotao can prove that I'm not copying, I can get 100 points today because I worked hard, You know no. I worked hard, and it took me half a class to get a perfect score for my homework. I know you definitely don't believe that I did it, but this is what I did, whether you believe it or not, he was done by me, whether you believe it or not, you go and ask Xiaotao.

This time, I and Xiaotao have full marks in the whole grade, and you don't want to reward me 、..Without further ado, let's judge it quickly) As a result, he scored 0 points, why is that? Because Xiao Tao's full score was written by himself, he actually scored 0 points for fear that his father would scold him so he added 1 10 Xiao Ming finished copying it before listening to Xiao Tao's explanation, So, The teacher's comment is:

Obviously, your lie is too outrageous, Xiaotao's score is obviously 0, and you told me that it was 100 points, and I haven't judged you yet, so you say that you are 100 points, which is too exaggerated, you prophet.

Remember.

Point your finger at the moon, and at night the moon will come down and cut your ears.

When I was a child, the old people in the family always told us not to point our fingers at the moon, otherwise the moon would come back at night and cut off our ears. And I also gave an example of whose ear was cut off, because the people who gave the example are people we know very well, so I have always thought it was true.

There have been several times when I accidentally pointed to the moon, and I listened to the old people's nonsense and kowtowed to it, hoping that it would forgive me and not come to cut off my ears.

Now that I'm older, although I know that if I point to the moon, the moon won't come to cut off my ears, but I still don't dare to point to the moon. After accidentally pointing it, even if you don't kowtow to it, you will still silently pray for the moon's forgiveness in your heart.

Your ears are hot because someone is thinking about you and laughing.

I don't know if sometimes your ears suddenly get hot, I used to do this a lot, and every time this happened, I would ask the adults why this was. They told me every time that it was because someone was thinking about me.

Some time ago, one day my ears were hot again, so I went to ask my mother, and my mother still told me that someone was thinking about me.

I told my boyfriend this statement and he said it was superstition. Actually, I also know that it should be caused by some other reasons. But I may have been used to this statement since I was a child, so I am still willing to believe it.

I think it's a beautiful lie, after all, it's always a happy thing for someone to think about themselves.

Jokes about white lies.

[Joke 1 about white lies].

In high school Chinese class, the teacher talked about the top ten people who moved China and said that there was a mother who needed a kidney replacement, and his son told a white lie and donated his kidney to his mother.

Then I asked my tablemate, "What do you think he lied?"

The thing looked calm, "Mom, I have three kidneys!" "I laughed and was asked out.

[Joke 2 about white lies].

One day, Xiao Chengcheng and his parents were watching TV on the sofa ......

Daddy Daddy, is it true that the little ones on TV lie and their noses will grow? Xiao Chengcheng tilted his head and asked his father who was sitting next to him.

Of course it's true, so Chengcheng can't lie, otherwise his nose will grow." Dad touched Xiao Chengcheng's head.

Then Dad always said to Mom that Mom is the most beautiful woman Dad has ever seen, why didn't her nose grow? ”

[Joke 3 about white lies].

The father took his 4-year-old son to the zoo to see the monkeys and told him about human development. After hearing this, the son asked, "So, people are monkeys?" Father: "Of course." Son: "Dad, which zoo did you belong to?" ”

[Joke 4 about white lies].

When Xiaozhi was in middle school, Mr. Xu, who taught them the Sipin class, was not good-looking, and he also spoke with a Tangshan accent, and his dignity and tone often became the laughing stock of those naughty boys when they discussed in private.

In fact, Mr. Xu also knows the nickname given to him by his classmates, but he is silent and shows his. The cultivation is extraordinary.

On this day, Ash and their class have a thinking class. Mr. Xu talked a lot about being honest, kind, and not lying, and then he suddenly asked: "Students, generally speaking, lying is shameful and sometimes terrible, but some people say that there is a 'lie that is good at fighting Yu's intentions'.

Just as everyone looked down and pondered, Ash's tablemate Dabao took the lead and raised his hand high.

Or Dabao's quick thinking, please tell me. Teacher Xu pointed at Dabao and shouted, he is a student who likes to raise his hand first.

After Dabao stood up, he cleared his throat and said, "Teacher Xu! You're so handsome! ”

As soon as his words fell, the classroom burst into laughter.

Teacher Xu was also amused, he was quite emotional and humorous and said: "I accidentally hit the muzzle of the gun, classmates try to imagine: if Teacher Xu is really handsome, then, will there be ugly monsters in the world?!."

Dabao's 'white lie' is really up to the international level! ”