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A sense of need is a feeling of a person who is in a relationship. Exposing your need for girls too early will only make girls think that you have other plans. And girls can also be terrified by such hints.
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For the pursuit and desire of beautiful things, it is very desirable to get something. It's easy to make people think that you are annoying, and you are very idle to guard her every day, wanting to escape from sight.
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The sense of need should be the feeling that you need the other person, because this will cause you to fail in chasing girls.
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Hello everyone, I'm Xiaobai, in this issue, let's talk about it, when chasing girls, why can't you expose your sense of need? Before talking about today's topic, let me ask you a question, do you know what a sense of need is? Simply put, it's the intensity of the feeling of wanting to do something, or wanting to get something.
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Because she will feel that you don't really love her as a person, just want to satisfy yourself, and will think that you are selfish.
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The sense of need, in short, is the intensity of the desire to do something, or the desire to get something. The stronger the sense of need, the more you want to do it, or get it. As the saying goes:
The more you want to get something or the more you want to do something, your emotions tend to fluctuate with your progress. This will have the opposite effect and make you further away from your expectations. Because, when a person's mood swings are great, it is easy to be exploited by others at this time, so as to put themselves in a passive position.
In love, the party with an excessive sense of need is often the one who is passive. As the compound guru said, "The grasp of the sense of need largely determines your position in an emotional relationship, dominating or being led."
The sense of demand is low, and the initiative is grasped; On the contrary, emotions are easily driven by the other party and are passive. "For people who have just fallen out of love, the one who is broken up often shows a high sense of need. Because they think that if they want to save their love, they must let the other party know how much they need him and how much they can't do without him.
In order to express these thoughts, they will continue to do things that their ex does not want to see or disgust, but instead escalates the conflict with each other. This is completely useless for redemption and will only push the ex further and further.
Therefore, on the road to redeeming love, if you want to change from passive to active, you must first reduce your sense of need, what are the benefits of reducing your sense of need for your recovery? It can lower the points of conflict between you and leave a ray of life for your path of recovery. As mentioned above, if the sense of need is too high, you will do things that the other person hates, increase his disgust with you, and the conflict between you will continue to rise.
It is very likely that the other party will block you directly, and you may never be able to contact him again in the future. Growing like this will only make your recovery efforts more difficult, and the whole recovery cycle will be extended indefinitely.
If you lower your sense of need, and show that your sense of need is lower than that of the other person anyway, then you can take the initiative. For example, if you reduce your contact with him, or even agree with his idea of breaking up, then the other person will feel that you don't seem to care about and need him as much as he thinks. Why are you like this?
Is it like yourself, do you think he is not good enough? Then he will start to reflect on himself, at least at this time he is still thinking about you. At the same time, as the connection decreases and the feelings fade, the original contradictions between you will slowly be weakened over time.
You don't contact him much, and you have to let him know that you are better off than he is, then he will feel that it was wrong to break up with you, and thus rationalize the breakup as wrong.
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The sense of need is a person's need for a certain person or a certain thing, such as the emotional sense of need, which is the need to be cared for, accompanied, and understood, and the sense of demand for objects is the sense of comfort, for example, a pair of shoes should fit the feet, and the sense of demand is that the feet are comfortable, and the feet are not tired after wearing them for a long time.
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The sense of need is only a temporary emotion, but if a girl obeys the sense of need, then it will be easy to do something that she regrets. Girls can control their sense of need by shifting their attention, taking deep breaths, confiding in others, and presetting results.
1. Divert attention.
Shifting attention is about putting the sense of need aside and distracting it with something else.
For example, when you have a strong need, you can ask a friend to go shopping and watch a movie, or you can play the piano and draw by yourself, so that you can have something to do. When you devote yourself to something else, your sense of need will naturally decrease.
2. Take a deep breath.
When you have a strong sense of need, your heart rate will rise and your muscles will become tense, and at this time, you can also adjust the breathing rate by taking deep breaths from a physiological level, so as to reduce the sense of need.
3. Confide in others.
When you have a strong sense of need, you can also confide in friends, family members, or psychologists, etc., in the process of confiding, you can relieve your emotions and reduce your sense of need.
4. Result preset.
We can't control our sense of need, and often our brains heat up and we do things we regret. At this time, you may want to preset the result first.
Presetting the outcome in advance will also allow you to pull back from the precipice and control yourself.
The five levels of Maslow's hierarchy of needs.
1. Physiological needs.
Including people's needs for air, water, sleep, food, warmth, and so on. This level is at the lowest end of the pyramid and belongs to the "basic needs".
2. Security requirements.
This refers to a person's need for shelter and stability. This level also includes the availability and security of resources, employment stability, family well-being, and so on. Security requirements are also "basic needs".
3. The need for love and belonging.
This level of need is "psychological", which refers to the need for people to have a sense of belonging and being loved. It can refer to a person's family relationships, or it can refer to friendship and love relationships.
4. Respect needs.
It also refers to a person's need for recognition, respect, and acknowledgement, as well as the desire to get things done and have those achievements recognized and appreciated.
5. Self-realization needs.
The last level in Maslow's hierarchy of needs, which is classified as the need for self-actualization, refers to a person's need to realize the full potential of self-acceptance, including the satisfaction and fulfillment that comes from creative efforts and other life-enriching activities. Essentially, this level emphasizes personal growth. <>
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When chasing girls, you must control your sense of need, and don't chat with girls frequently!
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The sense of need is simply to make a person feel the extent to which you need him to return to the branch, for example, your intention to pursue the other party is too obvious, so that the girl obviously knows that you want to get someone else, which exposes the sense of need.
The sense of need in a relationship, that is, the degree to which you like or need a person. The sense of need is actually a momentary emotion.
Sense of need and love are two different concepts, but in actual relationships, they are often confused. Sense of need refers to the degree to which a person needs or depends on another person, whereas love refers to the degree to which a person likes or appreciates another person. The need for Lu Shihan's sense of desire and love is not directly proportional, sometimes a person has a strong sense of need for another person, but does not necessarily really love him; Sometimes a person's love for another person is deep, but he is not necessarily needed.
A sense of need and love are not the same thing, but two factors that laugh at each other. If a person wants to have a healthy and happy love, he must learn to lower his sense of need, increase his self-confidence and self-love, and respect and trust the other person. In this way, you can feel comfortable and satisfied for both yourself and the other person.
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